My heart is broken.

[Guest guest]

From the first day of this year I started to renovate my house. As a matter of

fact, I am improving the house every year. For several years.

And now, when it's ready, looking good, then I find myself all alone, and find

myself pointless and disoriented. For what use I am doing all of those ? I

still am alone. There's none to love.

For the peoples who doesn't know me I mention I am gay, and there are some years

since I try to find myself a mate, a one I could call dear.

But then something happens and still I remain alone. I basically meet gay

people, but I do not feel like they are mine; It's a strange something, and that

is why I decided to ask for help. What is happening whit me ? Where am I doing

wrong ? What is my mistake ? What is happening ? I don't want to be alone.

Please someone help me !

[Guest guest]

Dearest Vasile:

My heart goes out to you, as I'm sure those of us reading your words feel.

However, not one of us (unless they know you intimately) can tell you what you

are (supposedly) doing wrong. I myself have had many guy friends that were gay

and I must be honest and share what I observed: many of them did not appear to

want to settle down...it seemed like they just wanted to party and play the

field.

But I can tell by the way you've worked on your house that you are one who DOES

want to settle down.

You know, Vasile, just as I was typing those words, I was reminded of a

particular species of bird where the male bird works tirelessly to build a nest

in hopes of attracting his mate. He constantly cleans and feathers it, always

adding to it...all in hopes of attracting his mate.

It is Spring (at least here)...Maybe you are just getting ready to attract your

mate.

Relax...be patient. Be yourself. Enjoy your life. Laugh! Live! Don't take

yourself so seriously. Remember, your " mate " is more likely to show up if you

are confident, relaxed and fun to be around...than if you're depressed or needy.

I hope I have not said too much or been too unkind. I did not intend my words to

bring any hurt to you.

Blessings that your mate may come 'home' soon, my brother,

Lynn ManyFires

>

> From the first day of this year I started to renovate my house. As a matter of

fact, I am improving the house every year. For several years.

> And now, when it's ready, looking good, then I find myself all alone, and find

myself pointless and disoriented. For what use I am doing all of those ? I

still am alone. There's none to love.

> For the peoples who doesn't know me I mention I am gay, and there are some

years since I try to find myself a mate, a one I could call dear.

> But then something happens and still I remain alone. I basically meet gay

people, but I do not feel like they are mine; It's a strange something, and that

is why I decided to ask for help. What is happening whit me ? Where am I doing

wrong ? What is my mistake ? What is happening ? I don't want to be alone.

Please someone help me !

>

[Guest guest]

>

> From the first day of this year I started to renovate my house. As a matter of

fact, I am improving the house every year. For several years.

> And now, when it's ready, looking good, then I find myself all alone, and find

myself pointless and disoriented. For what use I am doing all of those ? I

still am alone. There's none to love.

> For the peoples who doesn't know me I mention I am gay, and there are some

years since I try to find myself a mate, a one I could call dear.

> But then something happens and still I remain alone. I basically meet gay

people, but I do not feel like they are mine; It's a strange something, and that

is why I decided to ask for help. What is happening whit me ? Where am I doing

wrong ? What is my mistake ? What is happening ? I don't want to be alone.

Please someone help me !

>

Vasile,

It is very sad to be alone, my friend. I see that you enjoy renovating

your home but really would like to have your heart filled with the joy of having

someone to share it with. I can understand where you are coming from. Please

do not think you are doing anything wrong. There honestly is no wrong when it

comes to the person you want to spen the rest of your life with, yes? The

person must be on the same page as you, have similar likes and dislikes. Not to

say they must like everything you do, dear friend, then you would be bored, yes?

I feel that you are creating such beauty around you with renovating your house

and you do not feel that beauty inside your heart. I know it sounds terribly

cliche, but honestly from my experience, I found my partner in the least likely

place possible. I found him when I wasnt looking. I lived in the United States

just less than 2 years ago and found him on the internet of all places I am

not saying it is for you, it may be a different place you find that special

someone.

I do also realize that it is very difficult to live as a gay person in

the ugly close-minded society also. I am lucky to have many great friends that

are open minded and I am not gay myself but I have always lived by the saying

" Straight but now Narrow " I could not be narrow minded for there is so much love

out there to give and receive from friends and mates. I wholly wish you good

blessings of love on finding that " right " person. I dated for a little til I

found ...Actually, I was even married once, as was he...Please keep

smiling, I know it is hard, Vasile, but please do try for yourself, dear one! A

broken heart is not one to take lightly for it is hard to mend if we just

continue to stay stuck. It is easier to just stay stuck, I have been there, it

is a comfortable place, easier than trying to connect with someone new again...I

pray that you find that strength I know you possess to live each day knowing you

are loved and that person is out there thinking the same thing, where are you??

I hope this helps, please write me if you need anything for suuport in this hard

time...Love and light, Luna

[Guest guest]

I lived with a broken heart for many years for the same reason. I felt that I must be unloveable. But the truth is that it was I who did not love myself. And until I learned to do that, no one of quality came into my life. The way you do that is to begin to treat yourself with love. Buy yourself some flowers, just for you. Go out to a movie, just for you. Take a bubble bath, just for you. Be honest and have integrity, just for you. And above all ask your Creator to show you how He/She sees you. A process will begin that you cannot stop. I don't know what your future holds but I know it holds better than this for you. I have been happily married to my best friend now for 12 years.

Love, Light, Peace and Joy,Cheryl AnneVisit me at: http://www.myspace.com/senegalady

In a message dated 3/13/2010 6:09:09 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, vasigsir@... writes:

From the first day of this year I started to renovate my house. As a matter of fact, I am improving the house every year. For several years.And now, when it's ready, looking good, then I find myself all alone, and find myself pointless and disoriented. For what use I am doing all of those ? I still am alone. There's none to love. For the peoples who doesn't know me I mention I am gay, and there are some years since I try to find myself a mate, a one I could call dear.But then something happens and still I remain alone. I basically meet gay people, but I do not feel like they are mine; It's a strange something, and that is why I decided to ask for help. What is happening whit me ? Where am I doing wrong ? What is my mistake ? What is happening ? I don't want to be alone. Please someone help me !------------------------------------Humanity Healing,Healing the heart of Humanity,one soul at the time. <center>I GoodSearch & GoodShop for Humanity Healing Foundation.Raise money for Humanity Healing Foundation and Projects just by searching the Internet with GoodSearch.com(powered by ), or shopping online with GoodShop.com <*>To download our new ToolBar http://.OurOrganizationToolbar.com <*>www..net<*>©2006-2009 Humanity Healing FAIR USE NOTICE: This page may contains copyrighted material the use of which has not been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. This website distributes this material without profit to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the included information for research and educational purposes. We believe this constitutes a fair use of any such copyrighted material as provided for in 17 U.S.C § 107.~ Confidentiality Advisory ~This information is privileged and confidential and is intended only for the person or entity to which it is addressed.Any review, retransmission, dissemination or other use of this information(including attachments)by persons or entities other than the intended recipient is prohibited.If you are not the intended recipient, please delete the information fromyour system and contact the sender.<**>

[Guest guest]

Dear Vasile:

I am a Spiritualist and think differently than most people. What I am

about to write may ring true with you or not. I am writing a book and

it is in the final editing process. I am willing to send you the

chapter on the issue you are facing if you would like. (You are

facing the issues in the third house of the three little pigs.)

What you probably don't realize is that someone to love here on earth

still does not alleviate the ache in one's heart if one is intended

for a higher calling. It is always a risk when one relies on another

person to fulfill oneself. We are meant to be whole and that is a

life work, but cannot rely on another for that.

What our deepest desire is to end the separation we feel within

ourselves and with the outer highest, whether we call that God, the

All, the Oneness, the Universe. To end it within ourselves, one needs

to face ideas that we may carry that are not true. And we need to get

in touch with our higher selves, our soul, which can be done through

meditation and quieting our lesser thoughts and ideas. To connect

with the All involves meditation also, and it helps to connect with

those also on the path. (Incidentally, when you connect with this

group of people you may find who you are looking for.) In most cases,

this might involve study if you want to take the higher road, " the

road less traveled. "

You are also facing the Universal Principle of detachment which

states that you have to lose it to gain it. It not only will give you

inner peace to detach from your desire, but enable you and the

Universe to help guide you in ways that your highest being desires.

Love and Light,

Pat

Finding the Lost UNIVERSAL PRINCIPLES. The Three Little Pigs unlock

the door. To be released Fall 2010

[Guest guest]

Dear Vasile

You have received many loving messages and some truly excellent advice already -

bless all these kind and understanding souls!

I can tell you that some years ago I was in a similar place as you appear to be

now. I found the answer a few years later and this reflects well what many of

the others here have already told you: happiness and fulfilment are within you.

If you radiate contentment you WILL attract the right partner. The trouble is

that many gays live with a lot of guilt within themselves and lots of other

negative emotions. This is either a residue of past lives or simply their

upbringing and the difficult circumstances they have had to endure. In the so

called 'liberation' many people who are gay mistook the pursuit happiness with

hedonism but this offers only a shallow satisfaction.

My little bit of practical advice to you is simple, be yourself and try to seek

happiness in whatever truly makes you happy, when you are really and truly

yourself, you will attract the right person(s). Fretting too much may make you

anxious and this anxiety is also a negative emotion that may either attract the

wrong people or put others off. Find something constructive and fulfilling that

may not appear to be initially to be related to finding a partner, one will

come, for sure when your radiance is fully displayed.

Much of the other advice has been given to you here already. May you seek that

delightful peace which is in your heart and may you be able to find the partner

you deserve to fulfil your dreams

With love and light and blessing

Ayerbe

>

> From the first day of this year I started to renovate my house. As a matter of

fact, I am improving the house every year. For several years.

> And now, when it's ready, looking good, then I find myself all alone, and find

myself pointless and disoriented. For what use I am doing all of those ? I

still am alone. There's none to love.

> For the peoples who doesn't know me I mention I am gay, and there are some

years since I try to find myself a mate, a one I could call dear.

> But then something happens and still I remain alone. I basically meet gay

people, but I do not feel like they are mine; It's a strange something, and that

is why I decided to ask for help. What is happening whit me ? Where am I doing

wrong ? What is my mistake ? What is happening ? I don't want to be alone.

Please someone help me !

>

[Guest guest]

Vasile,

All these people are right in their advice. All of us have experienced what you are talking about to some degree (deep loneliness). IMO, the lesson for all of us starts with finding love within and connecting to our Creator.

I want to pass along some of my personal experience and the knowledge I've gained from many years of not having a life partner. (I'm 43, heterosexual female, btw.) But, I'm feeling this is not exactly the right time for that.

I have a couple questions for you...

1) Who/what do you love? (Focus on that to attract more love into your life.)

2) What are you grateful for? (Bring yourself closer to your natural spiritual state.)

3) What is your purpose for living?

4) Do you have meaninful work that in any way helps you feel you are contributing to society and using your gifts?

5) What actions are you taking to be the person you want to be? (Focus on your progress.)

I'm going to send something I clipped from a Beliefnet article in a separate email so things don't get too confusing. I hope you continue to write and share your experience with us.

Namaste,

Janey

[Guest guest]

I appreciate your honesty in exposing your vulnerabiity in this way. I'm not sure you are doing anything 'wrong'. You live in a world with an almost visceral hatred of gay love and sexuality and it is possible you have internalised some of this. My path is to seek in meditation the heights from which all may be understood and accepted - as Jesus said, 'Seek first the kingdom of heaven and all things will be added to you.'

Best wishes

Simenon

From: Vasile <vasigsir@...>Subject: [] My heart is broken. Date: Saturday, 13 March, 2010, 22:03

From the first day of this year I started to renovate my house. As a matter of fact, I am improving the house every year. For several years.And now, when it's ready, looking good, then I find myself all alone, and find myself pointless and disoriented. For what use I am doing all of those ? I still am alone. There's none to love. For the peoples who doesn't know me I mention I am gay, and there are some years since I try to find myself a mate, a one I could call dear.But then something happens and still I remain alone. I basically meet gay people, but I do not feel like they are mine; It's a strange something, and that is why I decided to ask for help. What is happening whit me ? Where am I doing wrong ? What is my mistake ? What is happening ? I don't want to be alone. Please someone help me !

[Guest guest]

dear vasile,

here is what i know. Is this an exact question about happiness? If im not wrong this is what i understand from you. We cant find true authentic happiness in other people rather it is in us. For one thing there are gays who may find a mate but those mates are only up to money. I have heard such situations from gays themselves.

Since you have good and beautiful house, why dont you enjoy pampering yourself inside it while counting all the good things that you already have. Friends, materials things, stress free life, no abusive realtionship,etc. actually countless..

good luck.

jane

From: Vasile <vasigsir@...>Subject: [] My heart is broken. Date: Saturday, 13 March, 2010, 22:03

From the first day of this year I started to renovate my house. As a matter of fact, I am improving the house every year. For several years.And now, when it's ready, looking good, then I find myself all alone, and find myself pointless and disoriented. For what use I am doing all of those ? I still am alone. There's none to love. For the peoples who doesn't know me I mention I am gay, and there are some years since I try to find myself a mate, a one I could call dear.But then something happens and still I remain alone. I basically meet gay people, but I do not feel like they are mine; It's a strange something, and that is why I decided to ask for help. What is happening whit me ? Where am I doing wrong ? What is my mistake ? What is happening ? I don't want to be alone. Please someone help me !