FW: DailyOM: Taking the Risk - Permission to Be Real

[Guest guest]

March 22, 2011

Taking the Risk

Permission to Be Real

People who keep it real present themselves as

they truly are, the good parts and the parts most of us would rather hide.

Most of us are familiar with the idea of keeping it real and have

an intuitive sense about what that means. People who keep it real don’t hide

behind a mask to keep themselves safe from their fear of how they might be

perceived. They don’t present a false self in order to appear more perfect,

more powerful, or more independent. People who keep it real present themselves

as they truly are, the good parts and the parts most of us would rather hide,

sharing their full selves with the people who are lucky enough to know them.

Being real in this way is not an easy thing to do as we live in a culture that

often shows us images of physical and material perfection. As a result, we all

want to look younger, thinner, wealthier, and more successful. We are rewarded

externally when we succeed at this masquerade, but people who are real remind

us that, internally, we suffer.

Whenever we feel that who we are is not enough and that we need to

be bigger, better, or more exciting, we send a message to ourselves that we are

not enough. Meanwhile, people who are not trying to be something more than they

are walk into a room and bring a feeling of ease, humor, and warmth with them.

They acknowledge their wrinkles and laugh at their personal eccentricities

without putting themselves down.

People like this inspire us to let go of our own defenses and relax for a

moment in the truth of who we really are. In their presence, we feel safe

enough to take off our masks and experience the freedom of not hiding behind a

barrier. Those of us who were lucky enough to have a parent who was able to

keep it real may find it easier to be that way ourselves. The rest of us may

have to work a little harder to let go of our pretenses and share the beauty

and humor of our real selves. Our reward for taking such a risk is that as we

do, we will attract and inspire others, giving them the permission to be real

too.