a little humor from the Onion

[Guest guest]

EPA Warns Human Beings No Longer

Biodegradable

WASHINGTON, DC—The Environmental Protection Agency issued a

bulletin Tuesday warning the bodies of American citizens, with their large

concentrations of artificial, synthetic, and often toxic substances, have been

reclassified as industrial waste. " The average human body is now only 35

percent organic, " EPA chief Ralph said. " Due to changes

brought about by modern detergents, silicone implants, and processed cheese

food product, it is no longer safe to allow human tissue to come into contact

with our nation's topsoil. " said the EPA is seeking funding to

construct a massive, federally managed human-body containment facility in the

Mojave Desert to safely and viably store human remains.

[Guest guest]

EPA Warns Human Beings No Longer

Biodegradable

WASHINGTON, DC—The Environmental Protection Agency issued a

bulletin Tuesday warning the bodies of American citizens, with their large

concentrations of artificial, synthetic, and often toxic substances, have been

reclassified as industrial waste. " The average human body is now only 35

percent organic, " EPA chief Ralph said. " Due to changes

brought about by modern detergents, silicone implants, and processed cheese

food product, it is no longer safe to allow human tissue to come into contact

with our nation's topsoil. " said the EPA is seeking funding to

construct a massive, federally managed human-body containment facility in the

Mojave Desert to safely and viably store human remains.

[Guest guest]

EPA Warns Human Beings No Longer

Biodegradable

WASHINGTON, DC—The Environmental Protection Agency issued a

bulletin Tuesday warning the bodies of American citizens, with their large

concentrations of artificial, synthetic, and often toxic substances, have been

reclassified as industrial waste. " The average human body is now only 35

percent organic, " EPA chief Ralph said. " Due to changes

brought about by modern detergents, silicone implants, and processed cheese

food product, it is no longer safe to allow human tissue to come into contact

with our nation's topsoil. " said the EPA is seeking funding to

construct a massive, federally managed human-body containment facility in the

Mojave Desert to safely and viably store human remains.

[Guest guest]

EPA Warns Human Beings No Longer

Biodegradable

WASHINGTON, DC—The Environmental Protection Agency issued a

bulletin Tuesday warning the bodies of American citizens, with their large

concentrations of artificial, synthetic, and often toxic substances, have been

reclassified as industrial waste. " The average human body is now only 35

percent organic, " EPA chief Ralph said. " Due to changes

brought about by modern detergents, silicone implants, and processed cheese

food product, it is no longer safe to allow human tissue to come into contact

with our nation's topsoil. " said the EPA is seeking funding to

construct a massive, federally managed human-body containment facility in the

Mojave Desert to safely and viably store human remains.