We humans manage to screw up everything......

[Guest guest]

This has been posted before (I think by Al Pater), but it's making the

rounds on the net again and is too cute not to post again:

In the beginning God covered the earth with broccoli

and cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red

vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live

long and healthy lives.

Then using God's bountiful gifts, Satan created Ben

and Jerry's and Krispy Kreme. And Satan said, " You

want hot fudge with that? "

And Man said " Yes! " and Woman said, " I'll have another

with sprinkles. " And lo they gained 10 pounds.

And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might

keep the figure that Man found so fair.

And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat,

and sugar from the cane, and combined them.

And Woman went from size 2 to size 14.....So God said, " Try my fresh green

garden salad. " And Satan presented crumbled Bleu Cheese dressing and garlic

toast on the side.

And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.

God then said, " I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in

which to cook them. "

And Satan brought forth deep fried coconut shrimp,

butter dipped lobster chunks and chicken-fried steak

so big it needed its own platter. And Man's cholesterol went through the

roof.

God then brought forth running shoes so that his

Children might lose those extra pounds.

And Satan came forth with a cable TV with remote

control so Man would not have to toil changing the

channels. And man and woman laughed and cried before the flickering light

and started wearing stretch

jogging suits.

Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in

fat and brimming with potassium and good nutrition.

Then Satan peeled off the healthful Skin and sliced

the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them in

animal fats and added copious quantities of salt.

And Man put on more pounds.

God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume

fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite.

And Satan created Mc's and the 99-cent double

cheeseburger. Then Lucifer said, " You want fries with

that? " and Man replied, " Yes! And super size 'em! " And

Satan said " It is good. " And Man went into cardiac

arrest.

God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

And Satan created HMOs.

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