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Dear

Kathy,

Just

speaking

from

experience

here.

Yes you

need to

set limits

and have

consequences

for your

daughters

actions.

The word

Punishment

makes me

wonder.

My

daughter

has done

it all as

far as

violence.

Now her

thing to

do is tell

me how

much she

hates me,

later in

the

evening

she will

be crying

and will

say that

she

doesn't

mean

to say the

things she

says but

it is the

voice in

her head

and that

she also

can't

stop

hitting

the other

girls ( I

have 4

girls,

3,5,7 and

9.) My 7

year old

has OCD.

What has

finally

helped us

is seeing

a

therapist.

has

her

Psychiatrist

who

in my

opinion

only knows

about meds

and relies

too much

on Freud.

He and I

argue

every

visit. We

found a

wonderful

lady who

is patient

and sweet

and

understanding.

Once a

week my

daughter

has

an hour or

more to

talk to

her.

Right now

they

just read

and talk

about

feelings,

also at

school the

Counselor

has

special

groups for

kids with

" problems " .

One group

is for

kids whose

parents

are

divorced,

the group

is

in is for

kids with

Anger

problems....the

funny

thing is

that she

is shy and

sweet at

school.

BUT thank

goodness

the

counselor

believes

me.

SOOOOOoooo

my advice

is to get

your

daughter

into

counseling.

It took so

much

searching

to find a

good

therapist

but it has

been worth

it. She

is also

counseling

our family

on ways to

" discipline "

and

explain to

why

we are

doing what

we

are doing.

I have

never met

your

daughter

but I

don't

think she

is using

OCD as an

excuse.

OCD

is such a

strange

animal

that I

believe it

is her OCD

making her

do the

things she

is

doing.

Good Luck

and find

somebody

outside

your

family for

your

daughter

to

talk to.

Knod

Kathy

wrote:

> Hi

> everyone,

> I've

> been

> noticing

> a new

> situation

> with my

> 5-year-old

> over the

> past two

> weeks or

> so. In

> everything

> she does

> she

> seems to

> be

> asking

> to be

> punished!

> She does

> outrageous

> things

> that

> there's

> no way

> she can

> be

> unaware

> are not

> allowed

> (things

> I can't

> begin to

> overlook.)

> She is

> strangely

> not

> upset or

> affected

> by the

> consequences

> I

> impose,

> and

> punishing

> her has

> had no

> effect

> on her

> behavior

> so

> far. She

> says ocd

> wants

> her to

> be in

> trouble,

> and I

> half

> believe

> her,

> earlier

> this

> year she

> began

> hurting

> herself.

> She said

> then

> that ocd

> liked

> the

> hurting

> though

> she

> didn't,

> and this

> went so

> far as

> her

> " enjoying "

> a blood

> draw and

> kindergarten

> booster

> shots--very

> weird

> experience

> for both

> of us.

> Thankfully

> this

> hurting

> behavior

> has

> lessened

> a lot,

> but now

> we have

> this

> provoking

> of

> punishment.

> She

> suggests

> spankings--I

> don't

> spank,

> well,

> rarely--instead

> I have

> so far

> withdrawn

> privileges. Has

> anyone

> else had

> this

> type of

> behavior

> from

> their

> child?

> Is it

> ocd, or

> maybe

> meds?

> (She

> takes

> 100mg

> Luvox)

> Or has

> she

> finally

> gotten

> around

> to using

> ocd to

> excuse

> poor

> behavior?

> However,

> this

> situation

> does

> have

> that

> weird

> ocd

> " feel "

> to

> it. What

> do I

> do?

> When I

> punish I

> get the

> feeling

> I am

> playing

> into the

> ocd.

> But I

> can't

> ignore

> her

> behavior. I

> should

> add that

> this

> behavior

> is from

> a child

> who was

> formerly

> " too

> good "

> IMO.

> She

> never

> misbehaved! Advice? Kathy

> R. in

> Indiana

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Guest guest

Kathy,I think it's the Luvox, I've forward it on to Kay,may friend in FT, Wayne

IN. she is the nurse I told you about .Her daughter is on Luvox maybe she

can help.I'll be praying for you and your daughter. I'm not sure if we'll be

able to go tomorrow,e is the same today.I'm not sure her mom can handle

her. Hang in there things well get better.

----- OJriginal Message -----

From: Kathy

list

Sent: Wednesday, April 28, 1999 9:42 AM

Subject: new problem

Hi everyone, I've been noticing a new situation with my 5-year-old over the

past two weeks or so. In everything she does she seems to be asking to be

punished! She does outrageous things that there's no way she can be unaware are

not allowed (things I can't begin to overlook.) She is strangely not upset or

affected by the consequences I impose, and punishing her has had no effect on

her behavior so far.

She says ocd wants her to be in trouble, and I half believe her, earlier this

year she began hurting herself. She said then that ocd liked the hurting though

she didn't, and this went so far as her " enjoying " a blood draw and kindergarten

booster shots--very weird experience for both of us. Thankfully this hurting

behavior has lessened a lot, but now we have this provoking of punishment. She

suggests spankings--I don't spank, well, rarely--instead I have so far withdrawn

privileges.

Has anyone else had this type of behavior from their child? Is it ocd, or

maybe meds? (She takes 100mg Luvox) Or has she finally gotten around to using

ocd to excuse poor behavior? However, this situation does have that weird ocd

" feel " to it.

What do I do? When I punish I get the feeling I am playing into the ocd. But

I can't ignore her behavior.

I should add that this behavior is from a child who was formerly " too good "

IMO. She never misbehaved!

Advice?

Kathy R. in Indiana

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Guest guest

Kathy,

I believe your daughter. But, it may not be OCD, it could be something else.

Only a professional may be able to tell. My nephew has aspen and he sometimes

asks for punishment. The difference is that he does not enjoy and would cry.

He always says things that are exactly the opposite to his real desire..

Good luck.

TC

" Kathy " <klr@...> on 04/28/99 10:42:38 AM

Please respond to onelist

" list " <onelist>

cc: (bcc: Tse Chao/JerseyCity/iNautix)

Subject: new problem

Hi everyone, I've been noticing a new situation with my 5-year-old over the past

two weeks or so. In everything she does she seems to be asking to be punished!

She does outrageous things that there's no way she can be unaware are not

allowed (things I can't begin to overlook.) She is strangely not upset or

affected by the consequences I impose, and punishing her has had no effect on

her behavior so far.

She says ocd wants her to be in trouble, and I half believe her, earlier this

year she began hurting herself. She said then that ocd liked the hurting though

she didn't, and this went so far as her " enjoying " a blood draw and kindergarten

booster shots--very weird experience for both of us. Thankfully this hurting

behavior has lessened a lot, but now we have this provoking of punishment. She

suggests spankings--I don't spank, well, rarely--instead I have so far withdrawn

privileges.

Has anyone else had this type of behavior from their child? Is it ocd, or maybe

meds? (She takes 100mg Luvox) Or has she finally gotten around to using ocd to

excuse poor behavior? However, this situation does have that weird ocd " feel "

to it.

What do I do? When I punish I get the feeling I am playing into the ocd. But I

can't ignore her behavior.

I should add that this behavior is from a child who was formerly " too good " IMO.

She never misbehaved!

Advice?

Kathy R. in Indiana

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  • 12 years later...
Guest guest

my 8yr old son had a modified radical mastoidectomy in march this year this was

his seventh operation since birth an i thought they had finally fixed him. we

had a complete dry ear for almost 2 an half months then i noticed some drainage

so i tried to have a look and his ear canal is blocked with a pink fleshy lump,

his next doctors appointment it not for 6 weeks should i take him back sooner

anyone know what this could be x

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Guest guest

Could be granulation tissue. Chloe has had that a few times in response to infection or the trauma of surgery. It has not been harmful to her, and usually just needs drops with a steroid to calm it down. I would take him in if he was mine, or at least call.

On Sat, Jun 4, 2011 at 7:50 PM, noah3108 <noah3108@...> wrote:

my 8yr old son had a modified radical mastoidectomy in march this year this was his seventh operation since birth an i thought they had finally fixed him. we had a complete dry ear for almost 2 an half months then i noticed some drainage so i tried to have a look and his ear canal is blocked with a pink fleshy lump, his next doctors appointment it not for 6 weeks should i take him back sooner anyone know what this could be x

------------------------------------

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Guest guest

>

> my 8yr old son had a modified radical mastoidectomy in march this year this

was his seventh operation since birth an i thought they had finally fixed him.

we had a complete dry ear for almost 2 an half months then i noticed some

drainage so i tried to have a look and his ear canal is blocked with a pink

fleshy lump, his next doctors appointment it not for 6 weeks should i take him

back sooner anyone know what this could be x

>

the smell has come back now does this mean the C-toma has returned can it grow

back in just 3 months?

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Guest guest

The smell is probably indicating infection, which may or may not be related to regrowth.

On Tue, Jun 7, 2011 at 11:41 AM, noah3108 <noah3108@...> wrote:

>> my 8yr old son had a modified radical mastoidectomy in march this year this was his seventh operation since birth an i thought they had finally fixed him. we had a complete dry ear for almost 2 an half months then i noticed some drainage so i tried to have a look and his ear canal is blocked with a pink fleshy lump, his next doctors appointment it not for 6 weeks should i take him back sooner anyone know what this could be x

>the smell has come back now does this mean the C-toma has returned can it grow back in just 3 months?

------------------------------------

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