Re: Called Senator Carper office today

[Guest guest]

Hi --

I'm sorry you have to go through so much... I have had to go through a lot too.

My husband and I quarreled all the time and blamed each other for our

predicament. At times it almost came to blows and we were NEVER EVER even

close to being that way before we had to move 9 times in one year and lose

EVERYTHING twice over including our health due to mold. We are just barely a

year out and things are getting better. We still have health setbacks and we

have lost all financial security. We are middle aged and are less financially

secure than 18 year olds and in debt like serial gamblers, lol. We weren't that

way before. To the contrary.... This can cause so much stress and all the fear

of dealing with the unknown... We finally decided we had to drop the blame and

get on the same side of the net and play the game together if we were going to

get through this. The reality is that nobody else, no matter how close of

friend or family, knew or could understand what we were going through except us

and others who have had to go through this walking nightmare that seemingly

never ends, and often, feels like it gets much much much worse before it starts

to get better. And expect setbacks. They are a reality to the healing curve.

The healing curve of your entire life on all levels, not just the financial,

health, and spiritual aspects... And know you cannot help or really change

another. Not even docs or lawyers or insurance companies can help us. We gotta

dig down and help ourselves. All the other stuff is external, and as you know

by now it can be gone in 60 seconds, once you know what is killing you. I have

friends who say to me: Oh, how could you leave everything? You had the MOST

gorgeous things? Your home....so lovely...well, you know as well as I do that

when something, including relationships are toxic, then let em go. I've had to

let a lot of friends and family go. I saw who they were when I went through

this. They didn't want to deal with me and my probs. They couldn't imagine

them. But guess what: I helped many through fires and other tragedies. It is

amazing how something that isn't accepted yet scares the bejesus outta folks.

So this experience will teach you total Self Reliance like nothing else. I

know. I used to think I was self reliant. I wasn't even close until now, lol.

: 0

As for food: Right now you are in survival mode. Screw it. You can't be

perfect. Yes, an ideal diet would be wonderful, but let's be practical. You've

just had a terrible shock with being separated from your husband too. What a

loss. Being abused is horrific and knowing it came from what you've gone

through is understandably so very very unfair. Try and focus and get just what

you can that is better for you. Baby steps. Don't try and redo your whole deal

overnight unless you have the funds, energy and help to do so...

That said: Try and focus on what you have, not what you've lost. If you can't

work it out with your husband, then you'll have to let him go too. Right now,

you have to take care of yourself. That isn't easy when we are in crisis, but

it's a starting place. And I'm not just blowing crap outta my keyboard. I know

some of the devastation you are feeling. Hang in there. It gets better. You

will never ever be the same, but you will like the person you are becoming if

you focus on what is right in your life, not what is wrong. The alternative is

to become a bitter, creepy, closed person who doesn't trust the world nor think

it is safe. You cannot go there. That is an attitude more toxic to your

well-being than any mold spores...

I know all the above blathering is so much easier said than done, as there were

days--more than I care to recall--that I was perusing the yellow page ads for

guns to put myself down, so I know some of your pain... Don't give up or give

into despair. This isn't permanent. I promise. You are surrounded by people

who understand what you are going through. You are safe and not alone no matter

what happens with your hubby, your house or your health. You are stronger than

you know. You will get through this. Many of us have and/or are in the

process... : ) There is life on the other side and we get there by helping

each other. For example: Just by writing to you, I feel better too, and I was

having a bit of a lull today wondering when I could get off some of these meds

and get back to having some kind of " normal " life where I didn't have to be

" bubble girl, " cuz of my recent super hero powers of detecting three mold spores

in any environment, lol. This whole mold trip is a journey. Not my favorite,

for sure, but it is what it is and we have been chosen for whatever reason to

deal with it. So, we will. I just stopped crying when I wrote to you. I am

starting to refocus on what I have, not what I don't. I hope this will help you

feel better too.

Best regards--Jaybird

----- Original Message -----

From: ldelp84227<mailto:ldelp84227@...>

<mailto: >

Sent: Wednesday, November 10, 2004 4:44 PM

Subject: [] Called Senator Carper office today

Hi all, I have been kind of getting abused from my husband. In my

desparation I called Senator Carper's office today just telling them

my family wouldn't be here if we had not had three moldy rental

properties. Slowly destroying us. If someone would have done

something in the beginning bla bla bla. My aunt use to babysit for

Senator Carper when he was governor of Delaware. Wish I knew that

back then. Told them about how so many are suffering with the

fragrances/chemical problem. They did say they couldn't do anything

about the local problem, but I did ask if he could at least jump on

the toxic mold legislation and the lady said she would call

Washington right away so I feel better about that. Just wanted to

let you guys know. I am here by myself and scared. There is an

automatic restraining order, I didn't do it. So I am here hungrey

and alone. I have food but not yeast free food. It is kind of like

I am being punished for being abused. Hopefully something good can

happen.

FAIR USE NOTICE:

This site contains copyrighted material the use of which has not always been

specifically authorized by the copyright owner. We are making such material

available in our efforts to advance understanding of environmental, political,

human rights, economic, democracy, scientific, and social justice issues, etc.

We believe this constitutes a 'fair use' of any such copyrighted material as

provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with Title 17

U.S.C. Section 107, the material on this site is distributed without profit to

those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the included information

for research and educational purposes. For more information go to:

http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/17/107.shtml.<http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscod\

e/17/107.shtml.> If you wish to use copyrighted material from this site for

purposes of your own that go beyond 'fair use', you must obtain permission from

the copyright owner.

[Guest guest]

Hi --

I'm sorry you have to go through so much... I have had to go through a lot too.

My husband and I quarreled all the time and blamed each other for our

predicament. At times it almost came to blows and we were NEVER EVER even

close to being that way before we had to move 9 times in one year and lose

EVERYTHING twice over including our health due to mold. We are just barely a

year out and things are getting better. We still have health setbacks and we

have lost all financial security. We are middle aged and are less financially

secure than 18 year olds and in debt like serial gamblers, lol. We weren't that

way before. To the contrary.... This can cause so much stress and all the fear

of dealing with the unknown... We finally decided we had to drop the blame and

get on the same side of the net and play the game together if we were going to

get through this. The reality is that nobody else, no matter how close of

friend or family, knew or could understand what we were going through except us

and others who have had to go through this walking nightmare that seemingly

never ends, and often, feels like it gets much much much worse before it starts

to get better. And expect setbacks. They are a reality to the healing curve.

The healing curve of your entire life on all levels, not just the financial,

health, and spiritual aspects... And know you cannot help or really change

another. Not even docs or lawyers or insurance companies can help us. We gotta

dig down and help ourselves. All the other stuff is external, and as you know

by now it can be gone in 60 seconds, once you know what is killing you. I have

friends who say to me: Oh, how could you leave everything? You had the MOST

gorgeous things? Your home....so lovely...well, you know as well as I do that

when something, including relationships are toxic, then let em go. I've had to

let a lot of friends and family go. I saw who they were when I went through

this. They didn't want to deal with me and my probs. They couldn't imagine

them. But guess what: I helped many through fires and other tragedies. It is

amazing how something that isn't accepted yet scares the bejesus outta folks.

So this experience will teach you total Self Reliance like nothing else. I

know. I used to think I was self reliant. I wasn't even close until now, lol.

: 0

As for food: Right now you are in survival mode. Screw it. You can't be

perfect. Yes, an ideal diet would be wonderful, but let's be practical. You've

just had a terrible shock with being separated from your husband too. What a

loss. Being abused is horrific and knowing it came from what you've gone

through is understandably so very very unfair. Try and focus and get just what

you can that is better for you. Baby steps. Don't try and redo your whole deal

overnight unless you have the funds, energy and help to do so...

That said: Try and focus on what you have, not what you've lost. If you can't

work it out with your husband, then you'll have to let him go too. Right now,

you have to take care of yourself. That isn't easy when we are in crisis, but

it's a starting place. And I'm not just blowing crap outta my keyboard. I know

some of the devastation you are feeling. Hang in there. It gets better. You

will never ever be the same, but you will like the person you are becoming if

you focus on what is right in your life, not what is wrong. The alternative is

to become a bitter, creepy, closed person who doesn't trust the world nor think

it is safe. You cannot go there. That is an attitude more toxic to your

well-being than any mold spores...

I know all the above blathering is so much easier said than done, as there were

days--more than I care to recall--that I was perusing the yellow page ads for

guns to put myself down, so I know some of your pain... Don't give up or give

into despair. This isn't permanent. I promise. You are surrounded by people

who understand what you are going through. You are safe and not alone no matter

what happens with your hubby, your house or your health. You are stronger than

you know. You will get through this. Many of us have and/or are in the

process... : ) There is life on the other side and we get there by helping

each other. For example: Just by writing to you, I feel better too, and I was

having a bit of a lull today wondering when I could get off some of these meds

and get back to having some kind of " normal " life where I didn't have to be

" bubble girl, " cuz of my recent super hero powers of detecting three mold spores

in any environment, lol. This whole mold trip is a journey. Not my favorite,

for sure, but it is what it is and we have been chosen for whatever reason to

deal with it. So, we will. I just stopped crying when I wrote to you. I am

starting to refocus on what I have, not what I don't. I hope this will help you

feel better too.

Best regards--Jaybird

----- Original Message -----

From: ldelp84227<mailto:ldelp84227@...>

<mailto: >

Sent: Wednesday, November 10, 2004 4:44 PM

Subject: [] Called Senator Carper office today

Hi all, I have been kind of getting abused from my husband. In my

desparation I called Senator Carper's office today just telling them

my family wouldn't be here if we had not had three moldy rental

properties. Slowly destroying us. If someone would have done

something in the beginning bla bla bla. My aunt use to babysit for

Senator Carper when he was governor of Delaware. Wish I knew that

back then. Told them about how so many are suffering with the

fragrances/chemical problem. They did say they couldn't do anything

about the local problem, but I did ask if he could at least jump on

the toxic mold legislation and the lady said she would call

Washington right away so I feel better about that. Just wanted to

let you guys know. I am here by myself and scared. There is an

automatic restraining order, I didn't do it. So I am here hungrey

and alone. I have food but not yeast free food. It is kind of like

I am being punished for being abused. Hopefully something good can

happen.

FAIR USE NOTICE:

This site contains copyrighted material the use of which has not always been

specifically authorized by the copyright owner. We are making such material

available in our efforts to advance understanding of environmental, political,

human rights, economic, democracy, scientific, and social justice issues, etc.

We believe this constitutes a 'fair use' of any such copyrighted material as

provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with Title 17

U.S.C. Section 107, the material on this site is distributed without profit to

those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the included information

for research and educational purposes. For more information go to:

http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/17/107.shtml.<http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscod\

e/17/107.shtml.> If you wish to use copyrighted material from this site for

purposes of your own that go beyond 'fair use', you must obtain permission from

the copyright owner.

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

I ditto what Jaybird says. Take care of yourself....let things go that you

can't control. Do what you need to do to survive for the time being. Take

baby steps to get your life where you want it to be. I know some of your pain

too, personally,....but you will become a better, wiser, stronger, and more

resilient person because of it. I was a victim of abuse and a mold victim - but

at two very different times of my life. Having to go through both at the same

time is not going to be easy - but you will prevail - I know you will.

God Bless,

ML

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

I ditto what Jaybird says. Take care of yourself....let things go that you

can't control. Do what you need to do to survive for the time being. Take

baby steps to get your life where you want it to be. I know some of your pain

too, personally,....but you will become a better, wiser, stronger, and more

resilient person because of it. I was a victim of abuse and a mold victim - but

at two very different times of my life. Having to go through both at the same

time is not going to be easy - but you will prevail - I know you will.

God Bless,

ML