Re: to Pam...Barbara

[Guest guest]

Pam,

I dont know what you could do to change her opinion of herself. I dont even know what caused my low self esteem. I had the best parents, always had friends,boyfriends, etc. I always had a lot of fears though and had panic attacks since age 14 so that may have contributed. Even when I got the implants I still never felt good enough. Did you ever ask her why she felt that way? Did she see any abuse from your 1st husband? Did you ever try counseling for her?

[Guest guest]

Barbara, I think that the number 1 reason for getting implants is low

self esteem. It's so stupid! We are all most likely prettier than

the average girl and most likely slim. Not to stereotype or offend

anyone, but I don't know any chubby homely women with implants!

Why?? It's so sad. I want so badly to change that. One of my

daughter's friends got implants about 6 months ago. Unfortunately it

was before I figured out why I was sick. She's 17! She is

absolutely one of the most beautiful girls I have ever seen! But,

she had a baby 2 weeks after my daughter had hers. So, both of them

lost their firm little teenage bodies because of being pregnant and

breast feeding. They both nursed their babies for almost 4 months.

My daughter wanted implants too! I convinced her to wait until she

was older and done having babies and then if she absolutely had to do

something - to just get a lift. She is so self-conscious. Her self-

esteem is terrible too and she is so beautiful. Not just because

she's my daughter, but truthfully, she is gorgeous! Ever since she

was born, strangers would stop me and say - O my, we're going to see

her on the cover of a magazine some day! She's too short to model,

but she won quite a few beauty pageants when she was little. I

thought that would make her realize she really is beautiful, but she

doesn't believe it! She judges her self worth on every imperfection

on her body. How do I help her change that? I tell her she's

beautiful every day. Any suggestions? She's chosen men who are

jerks too. Her baby's father is 19 and a " player " who does things

behind her back. She deserves someone so much better, but she

probably won't realize that until she's 30 something like me!

Pam

> Pam,

> I feel so bad for all you have been through! I always chose the

wrong men

> too, I always had low self esteem thats why I had gotten the damn

implants 8yrs

> ago.

[Guest guest]

Barbara, did see my husband abuse me. He still won't admit to

doing anything wrong but she's not scared to tell him all about it!

She hardly ever sees him, but when she does she brings up the abuse

and he denies it. When I finally decided to leave him it was because

he came in my room and choked me with her in the same bed. The fear

that he would hurt her next finally gave me the strength I need to

leave him. I had him arrested that day and filed for divorce. She

was 4 & 1/2 but very mature. I think that her lack of a relationship

with her father and step-father definitely contributed to how she

feels about herself and towards men. She was in counseling for a

while but when she got pregnant she stopped. I'll see if I can get

her to start again.

Pam

> Pam,

> I dont know what you could do to change her opinion of herself. I

dont even

> know what caused my low self esteem. I had the best parents,

always had

> friends,boyfriends, etc. I always had a lot of fears though and had

panic attacks

> since age 14 so that may have contributed. Even when I got the

implants I still

> never felt good enough. Did you ever ask her why she felt that

way? Did she

> see any abuse from your 1st husband? Did you ever try counseling

for her?