>>> THE VIRTUES OF LOVE >>>

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The first virtue for good loving is DISCIPLINE. Discipline means doingsomething hard because it is right. We are not usually very disciplinedpeople. We tend to avoid the difficult thing, to take the easy way out. We

often avoid doing what is right because it involves SACRIFICE. Love ishard. It demands SACRIFICE OF THE SELF, which is the last thing we want togive up.Love also demands PATIENCE. It is not something that comes easily and

instantly. You have to work at it and let it grow. Loving is a slow,tedious process that comes with time. We also have to be patient withourselves and each other. Willing to wait and let love grow. Love always

grows in patience.Love must be REASONABLE. It must have an intellectual basis. Many of thecaricatures of love we see around are based on emotion and impetuosity. Ifwe act without thinking, we distort love. If love is unreasonable, it can

only lead to disaster, and eventually, to disillusionment.It is also impossible to love without HUMILITY, for the biggest obstacle tolove is pride. Humility demands acceptance of the truth. Humility is not an

easy virtue. It makes demands on us, it threatens the ego, it forces usinto excuses or self-justification. But the real lover is a truly humbleperson.FAITH is at the bottom of all happy loving. Faith means that we believe

even if we do not have evidence for the belief. You cannot love anotherperson if you do not have faith in yourself. The most deadly enemy of loveis lack of trust and faith.The final virtue that is needed for good loving is COURAGE. In many ways,

it is the most important of them all. We are good people; we need and wantto love. But what gets in the way is our insecurity, our lack of courage.We are afraid that we cannot do it, or we are afraid of what other people

will say or think. It takes a lot of courage to love.-- ! Jai Gurudev !