Marriage

[Guest guest]

I have no fears that will ever leave me. If he were to die before

me tho, I would be devastated. I sometimes wonder if I'd want to go

on...I don't think I would. Blah, not something I like to think about.

Lori

Ksmile96@... wrote:

> How do the rest of you all feel about your partner and them dying,

> leaving, etc.?

> Kimi

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Kimi, I have no idea what I would do with ought Rich. He isn't only my

partner, he is my best friend. I suppose I would be lost for a while, but I

would become the way I was before I met him again. I had fun hanging out with my

friends and goofing off when I was single and I guess I would just become that

way again. Tammy

Ksmile96@... wrote:

I was actually not looking for a major serious relationship when I initially

met , I guess that's why it took so long to see he is my soul mate. Be4

we dated I too was enjoying life, was going to school, had many friends,

etc. Things are now the mostly the same except is now the center of my

world and if something happens to him I will be devastated. Sometimes I think

this is not healthy but I just can't imagine it any other way? How do the

rest of you all feel about your partner and them dying, leaving, etc.?

Kimi

In a message dated 10/1/2005 7:46:17 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

alrt@... writes:

I actually was loving being single when I met chuck. I was was able to

date easily because i knew i wouldn't be crushed if i was rejected. i wasn't

looking for a relationship to make me happy...i already was

happy...content...fulfilled. i learned that having a rich, full life,

independent of having a

romantic relationship makes the relationship i now have all the richer. we

have our separate and combined interests and friendships.

this may sound morbid, but if something ever happened to him i'd be

extremely sad, probably depressed, very heartbroken. but i also know my life

wouldn't be over. i have many fulfilling relationships and goals and a sense

of

purpose that are independent of the romantic relationship i have with chuck.

my

life was already rich and fulfilling. chuck makes it all the sweeter.

alana

[Guest guest]

Is it disgusting to think I'd be devastated if Joe ever died because

I'd be without my major caregiver rather than " lose " a love? I know

he'd never leave me, but I worry about his safety often. I would be

heartbroken if he died, but I know I would continue to live

emotionally and I know that wouldn't have really lost him or his love.

I'm only worried that my life would end, physically, because I rely on

him so much for everything throughout the day.

<3 Kendra

>

> > How do the rest of you all feel about your partner and them dying,

> > leaving, etc.?

> > Kimi

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

That is understandable Kendra, if my husband wasn't around I wouldn't be able to

use the shower or get into my bedroom. My wheelchair barely fits down my hall

and he has to pick me up and put me into bed just so I can go into my bedroom. I

would be completely lost without his help, but emotionally I know I could move

on. Tammy

Kendra <kendranicole@...> wrote:

Is it disgusting to think I'd be devastated if Joe ever died because

I'd be without my major caregiver rather than " lose " a love? I know

he'd never leave me, but I worry about his safety often. I would be

heartbroken if he died, but I know I would continue to live

emotionally and I know that wouldn't have really lost him or his love.

I'm only worried that my life would end, physically, because I rely on

him so much for everything throughout the day.

<3 Kendra

>

> > How do the rest of you all feel about your partner and them dying,

> > leaving, etc.?

> > Kimi

> >

> >

> >

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[Guest guest]

We have financially planned for my future so that I would be very

comfortable if something were to happen to . It's the whole losing

a big part of myself thing that I would have trouble dealing with.

Twenty-one years of intense love and unconditional support would, in my

opinion, would be hard to part with.

L

Kendra wrote:

> Is it disgusting to think I'd be devastated if Joe ever died because

> I'd be without my major caregiver rather than " lose " a love? I know

> he'd never leave me, but I worry about his safety often. I would be

> heartbroken if he died, but I know I would continue to live

> emotionally and I know that wouldn't have really lost him or his love.

> I'm only worried that my life would end, physically, because I rely on

> him so much for everything throughout the day.

>

> <3 Kendra

>

>

> >

> > > How do the rest of you all feel about your partner and them dying,

> > > leaving, etc.?

> > > Kimi

> > >

> > >

> > >

>

>

>

>

> A FEW RULES

>

> * The list members come from many backgrounds, ages and beliefs So all

> members most be tolerant and respectful to all members.

>

> * Some adult language and topics (like sexual health, swearing..) may

> occur occasionally in emails. Over use of inappropriate language will

> not be allowed. If your under 16 ask your parents/gaurdian before you

> join the list.

>

> * No SPAMMING or sending numerous emails unrelated to the topics of

> spinal muscular atrophy, health, and the daily issues of the disabled.

>

> Post message:

> Subscribe: -subscribe

> Unsubscribe: -unsubscribe

>

> List manager: (Sexy Mature Artist) Email: Esma1999@...

>

>

>

>

> oogroups.com

>

> List manager: (Sexy Mature Artist) Email: Esma1999@...

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

A few more personal observations. Yes, it is important to be connected and

satisfied in one's own self - and this makes you a better partner, but I can't

believe that anyone should settle just for that and say it doesn't matter if

I ever find a great relationship. Whether early or late or once in a lifetime

or ten times in a lifetime, we need to keep trying for a relationship.

That's what it is to be human - to need the presence of another person - to

need

their touch, their love. We aren't meant to be alone. I KNOW this is true,

although I right now I don't feel it - I know it's true because I've lived long

enough to believe it and experience it. When my first wife died I was 34, and

through the pain, immediately I knew I would find someone else, that I

needed someone else - this causes some guilt, especially when you start feeling

sexual desire, and the need to talk, to love, to be with, so soon while at the

same time you are crying three times a day without warning - talk about

conflicted! When I divorced at 45 the same was true - same needs, same desires,

same grief. Now at 57, it seems different - I'm so crushed, it is almost

impossible to think of going on to another relationship, but intellectually, I

know, that we are meant to partner - and even though I can't imagine how this

could happen in my own life again, I would never tell anyone, to be satified

with themselves and content to be without a partner. We should all, always be

looking for intimate companionship, this is what it is to be alive.

Bob

C Manning Jr

PO Box 1248

Decatur GA 30031-1248

404 728-8297 home

404 725-1842 cell

residence:

2205 N Crossing Way

Decatur GA 30033-4175

work email:

rmanning@...

[Guest guest]

Lori,

I also have no fears will leave me intentionally. I know its very

morbid and upsetting to think about your partner dying, but has DMD and

the

odds of him dying be4 me are a lot greater. So it crosses my mind a lot, esp

when one of his DMD friends die suddenly.

Kimi

In a message dated 10/2/2005 11:43:14 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

those2@... writes:

I have no fears that will ever leave me. If he were to die before

me tho, I would be devastated. I sometimes wonder if I'd want to go

on...I don't think I would. Blah, not something I like to think about.

Lori

[Guest guest]

Tammy,

is also my Best Friend and the 1st male to unconditionally love me. He

has done so much for me. This is why I can't imagine life w/out him. It's

hard when he is the center of my world. I'm sure I would go on w/out him

eventually, but it would be very hard.

Kimi

In a message dated 10/2/2005 1:16:05 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

tammylinne@... writes:

Hi Kimi, I have no idea what I would do with ought Rich. He isn't only my

partner, he is my best friend. I suppose I would be lost for a while, but I

would become the way I was before I met him again. I had fun hanging out with

my

friends and goofing off when I was single and I guess I would just become

that way again. Tammy

[Guest guest]

How do you absolutely know it will never be? Theres hope. I always rely on

hope. There is always hope.

Kimi

In a message dated 10/2/2005 8:09:59 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

cenlared@... writes:

Don't get me wrong, icing can definitely be the best part. But don't

you think some cakes are made to be without? Sorry for the play on

words, but I don't want to think about or live longing for something

that probably won't be....

Is that naive?

[Guest guest]

Don't get me wrong, icing can definitely be the best part. But don't

you think some cakes are made to be without? Sorry for the play on

words, but I don't want to think about or live longing for something

that probably won't be....

Is that naive?

[Guest guest]

Bob, don't think my post was in response to yours. I didn't see it

when I wrote. You expressed it beautifully. I'm just stating the

possibility that for some it doesn't happen and we can't allow

ourselves to feel diminished because of that.

[Guest guest]

This reminds me of a favorite quote of mine,

" Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies. "

- Andy Dufresne, " The Shawshank Redemption "

You should ever give up on anything. I agree with Kimi, there is always hope.

Re: Re: Marriage

How do you absolutely know it will never be? Theres hope. I always rely on

hope. There is always hope.

Kimi

[Guest guest]

Bob,

Everything you said was beautifully put. I agree with you 100%. Believe me,

it's a lonely life when you go through your life not sharing it with someone.

Yes, it's human to need love; everyone needs that. As I said, I'm 54 and

still looking for love. Sometimes, it's discouraging and it gets tiring, but I

still try. Thanks for your understanding and sensitivity.

[Guest guest]

I agree with Kendra. A big part of Lee possibly dying first that

worries me is that, when he's gone, there will be no one to physically

care for me. He has a life insurance policy, but I'm pretty sure with

the amount of care I need, I'd burn through that pretty quickly. And I

won't qualify for Medicaid (and attendants) until I basically pay my way

into poverty. The cynical side of me is convinced I'd end up

languishing in a nursing home somewhere. And then added to that, is the

pain of losing my greatest source of emotional support too. I honestly

think it'd be more than I could bear. I actually *pray* that I die first.

Jenn

[Guest guest]

Awww Ann glad you and dh enjoyed the concert. Sunday nights are the pits for me too, I can't usually wind down early enough to get to bed and asleep at a decent hour. Hoping that things work out for dh and a new job ;-) Less stress is better!

[Guest guest]

OMG Mike.. Im so sorry...If you need to talk im here for you.. I have been there

done that,, going though it my self.. Please know Im here for ya...

  Love and soft hugs

    T

 lisa

From: Mike <mike2boys@...>

Subject: marriage

Stimulator

Date: Monday, April 27, 2009, 9:32 AM

My marriage is over my wife wants me to move out our home which i will not do. I

am worried about what going to happen thought i share i am 38 not wanting to

find another women but not going go be alone mike group owner

[Guest guest]

Wow...I wasn't expecting that.

Deanna

Sent from my iPhone

On Apr 27, 2009, at 6:32 AM, " Mike " <mike2boys@...> wrote:

My marriage is over my wife wants me to move out our home which i will not do. I

am worried about what going to happen thought i share i am 38 not wanting to

find another women but not going go be alone mike group owner

[Guest guest]

Mike, I am so, so sorry. I know a number of us on here have gone thru this and

so we're all there for you. My heart goes out to you, you don't need the added

stress with health issues. I pray you are able to work things out and prevent

this from happening.

Take Care,

B. in TEXAS

Until one has loved an animal, part of their soul remains in darkness

________________________________

From: Mike <mike2boys@...>

Stimulator

Sent: Monday, April 27, 2009 8:32:05 AM

Subject: marriage

My marriage is over my wife wants me to move out our home which i will not do. I

am worried about what going to happen thought i share i am 38 not wanting to

find another women but not going go be alone mike group owner

------------------------------------

[Guest guest]

Mike,

I know how hard it is to think of being alone. I am also 38 and alone. It can

very hard some days to not have someone to lean on, but when I am down I know I

have my friends here. Just yesterday I had to offload onto . There are so

many of us here to help you. We will always have open ears and open hearts for

you for anything you need.

Keep your chin up and be strong.

Hugs

>

> My marriage is over my wife wants me to move out our home which i will not do.

I am worried about what going to happen thought i share i am 38 not wanting to

find another women but not going go be alone mike group owner

>

[Guest guest]

Thank you so much mike group owner

>

> Mike, I am so, so sorry. I know a number of us on here have gone thru this

and so we're all there for you. My heart goes out to you, you don't need the

added stress with health issues. I pray you are able to work things out and

prevent this from happening.

>

> Take Care,

> B. in TEXAS

>

> Until one has loved an animal, part of their soul remains in darkness

>

>

>

>

>

>

> ________________________________

> From: Mike <mike2boys@...>

> Stimulator

> Sent: Monday, April 27, 2009 8:32:05 AM

> Subject: marriage

>

> My marriage is over my wife wants me to move out our home which i will not do.

I am worried about what going to happen thought i share i am 38 not wanting to

find another women but not going go be alone mike group owner

>

>

>

> ------------------------------------

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thank you maria where do you live state mike group owner

> >

> > My marriage is over my wife wants me to move out our home which i will not

do. I am worried about what going to happen thought i share i am 38 not wanting

to find another women but not going go be alone mike group owner

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Oh Mike - I am so sorry.  This is really something that no one needs to deal

with.  This has to be so tough - don't know as I'm not in this

situation........yet (not comfortable enough to share).......but can certainly

feel for you.  I can say that sometimes being alone is better than being

aggravated 24-7. (don't know if that's how you feel or not, just my situation)

Take care of yourself.................sheryl

________________________________

From: fpddcso <fpddcso@...>

Stimulator

Sent: Monday, April 27, 2009 9:33:28 AM

Subject: Re: marriage

Mike,

I know how hard it is to think of being alone. I am also 38 and alone. It can

very hard some days to not have someone to lean on, but when I am down I know I

have my friends here. Just yesterday I had to offload onto . There are so

many of us here to help you. We will always have open ears and open hearts for

you for anything you need.

Keep your chin up and be strong.

Hugs

>

> My marriage is over my wife wants me to move out our home which i will not do.

I am worried about what going to happen thought i share i am 38 not wanting to

find another women but not going go be alone mike group owner

>

[Guest guest]

Hey Mike,

What the He!! is going on !!! are you all right E-mail me let me know

what is going on! Be strong you know you can talk to me anytime

Kathy Sweet

>

> My marriage is over my wife wants me to move out our home which i will not do.

I am worried about what going to happen thought i share i am 38 not wanting to

find another women but not going go be alone mike group owner

>

[Guest guest]

Jay,

My marriage has recovered, but it took a willingness on my husbands part. He

knew deep down that i wasnt making it up. He also had outside influences that

werent helping. If your ex is willing to talk maybe you could show her some

things. If she isnt willing to listen then maybe it is for the best. From what i

have learned from dealing with people and this infestation, is that it is YOUR

reality. If someone wants to judge you based off of it then its not worth trying

to prove because they will always find something to balk at. You could also be

fueling the fire. The world will not end if one or two people dont like, or

believe you. WE believe you, and we know its true. You will see when you do find

true love, because true love would listen and understand. You are an awesome

person, and i have no doubt that you wont be single for long. I hope this helps,

if it doesnt pertain to your situation, then please disregard.

Love and Luck

Holly

> >

> >

> > I've had a horrible 24 hours. Fridays are the worst for me, probably because

of exhaustion. I'm also out of a lot of key things (ESP, Opaline, a few herbs

and oils). I tried to use the safe2use enzyme cleaner and it just seemed to

aggravate the little buggers. An all-out attack started in the shower and has

barely let up since. Everything I touch = bite.

> >

> > After the shower I put on my strongest oil yet (olive, tea tree, coconut,

neem, oregano, clove, wormwood, black walnut + esp serum). Lately the things

emerging from my skin after oil application are enough to make me want to weep..

Huge grey blobs that look like little rocks, but are very spongy. I used to get

about a dozen of these, mainly clear w/ some fibers tangled within. The last 2

oil applications yeilded appx. 400 or 500 of these little balls. They range in

size from barely visible to the size of a pea. INCREDIBLY disgusting. (I don't

know if I should scrape them all up and send them to Wymore or something.)

> >

> > I can't say that any part of my protocol is working, to be frank. I've been

hitting the Psyllium husk powder hard at night, and this has forced 6 or 7 bowel

movements per day. On my third day of doing this, a thick wad of what resembled

black rubber bands came out. I do not think they were worms but maybe they were

(I am on a high dose of Vermox). They didn't look organic at all. Pehaps the

Willard Water had some affect there, too. Anyway, enough about my shit.

> >

> > After spending most of the early morning wiping off the grey globs, I

slipped on the oil on the floor. Luckily I didn't break my neck, but I burst my

air mattress and slept on a board all night.

> >

> > Well, enough of my sharing. I will just end by saying that I looked up a

very respected friend and reverend and I think he did more for me spiritually

than anyone or anything ever has. But god I know so much can happen --

especially for my poor parents! If only the money was there. I would seriously

rob a bank if I felt i could pull it off.. I think I've passed the point where

the beautiful freedoms mostpeople experience are such gold to me, I can hardly

dream of having them again.

> >

> > Ian

> >

> > " You are in love with intelligence, until it frightens you. For your ideas

are terrifying and your hearts are faint. Your acts of pity and cruelty are

absurd, committed with no calm, as if they were irresitible. Finally, you fear

blood more and more. Blood and time. "

> > - Valéry

> >

> >

> > " It's impossible for words to describe what is necessary to those who do not

know what horror means. Horror. Horror has a face... and you must make a friend

of horror. Horror and moral terror are your friends. If they are not then they

are enemies to be feared. They are truly enemies. I remember when I was with

Special Forces. Seems a thousand centuries ago. We went into a camp to inoculate

the children. We left the camp after we had inoculated the children for Polio,

and this old man came running after us and he was crying. He couldn't see. We

went back there and they had come and hacked off every inoculated arm. There

they were in a pile. "

> > -Walter E. Kurtz (Col.)

> >

>

>

>

>

>

> __________________________________________________________________

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8. Optimized for Get it Now for Free! at

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[Guest guest]

Thanks for the reply Holly. You are very encouraging.

Jay

From: Holly <hollyjane11@...>bird mites Sent: Tuesday, May 19, 2009 10:19:06 AMSubject: Re: Marriage

Jay,My marriage has recovered, but it took a willingness on my husbands part. He knew deep down that i wasnt making it up. He also had outside influences that werent helping. If your ex is willing to talk maybe you could show her some things. If she isnt willing to listen then maybe it is for the best. From what i have learned from dealing with people and this infestation, is that it is YOUR reality. If someone wants to judge you based off of it then its not worth trying to prove because they will always find something to balk at. You could also be fueling the fire. The world will not end if one or two people dont like, or believe you. WE believe you, and we know its true. You will see when you do find true love, because true love would listen and understand. You are an awesome person, and i have no doubt that you wont be single for long. I hope this helps, if it doesnt pertain to your situation, then please disregard.Love and

LuckHolly> >> > > > I've had a horrible

24 hours. Fridays are the worst for me, probably because of exhaustion. I'm also out of a lot of key things (ESP, Opaline, a few herbs and oils). I tried to use the safe2use enzyme cleaner and it just seemed to aggravate the little buggers. An all-out attack started in the shower and has barely let up since. Everything I touch = bite. > > > > After the shower I put on my strongest oil yet (olive, tea tree, coconut, neem, oregano, clove, wormwood, black walnut + esp serum). Lately the things emerging from my skin after oil application are enough to make me want to weep.. Huge grey blobs that look like little rocks, but are very spongy. I used to get about a dozen of these, mainly clear w/ some fibers tangled within. The last 2 oil applications yeilded appx. 400 or 500 of these little balls. They range in size from barely visible to the size of a pea. INCREDIBLY disgusting. (I don't know if I should scrape them all up and send them to

Wymore or something.)> > > > I can't say that any part of my protocol is working, to be frank. I've been hitting the Psyllium husk powder hard at night, and this has forced 6 or 7 bowel movements per day. On my third day of doing this, a thick wad of what resembled black rubber bands came out. I do not think they were worms but maybe they were (I am on a high dose of Vermox). They didn't look organic at all. Pehaps the Willard Water had some affect there, too. Anyway, enough about my shit. > > > > After spending most of the early morning wiping off the grey globs, I slipped on the oil on the floor. Luckily I didn't break my neck, but I burst my air mattress and slept on a board all night. > > > > Well, enough of my sharing. I will just end by saying that I looked up a very respected friend and reverend and I think he did more for me spiritually than anyone or anything ever has. But god I know

so much can happen -- especially for my poor parents! If only the money was there. I would seriously rob a bank if I felt i could pull it off.. I think I've passed the point where the beautiful freedoms mostpeople experience are such gold to me, I can hardly dream of having them again.> > > > Ian> > > > "You are in love with intelligence, until it frightens you. For your ideas are terrifying and your hearts are faint. Your acts of pity and cruelty are absurd, committed with no calm, as if they were irresitible. Finally, you fear blood more and more. Blood and time."> > - Valéry> > > > > > "It's impossible for words to describe what is necessary to those who do not know what horror means. Horror. Horror has a face... and you must make a friend of horror. Horror and moral terror are your friends. If they are not then they are enemies to be feared. They are truly enemies.

I remember when I was with Special Forces. Seems a thousand centuries ago. We went into a camp to inoculate the children. We left the camp after we had inoculated the children for Polio, and this old man came running after us and he was crying. He couldn't see. We went back there and they had come and hacked off every inoculated arm. There they were in a pile."> > -Walter E. Kurtz (Col.)> >> > > > > > ____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _> Make your browsing faster, safer, and easier with the new Internet Explorer® 8. Optimized for Get it Now for Free! at http://downloads. / ca/internetexplo rer/>

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