Guest guest Posted October 16, 2007 Report Share Posted October 16, 2007 Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital. Please select from the following options menu: If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6. If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want, stay on the line so we can trace your call. If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the Mother Ship. If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press. If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway. If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696. If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have low self-esteem, please hang up our operators are too busy to talk with you. If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. You won't be crazy forever. If you are blonde, don't press any buttons, you'll just mess it up. This coming week is National Mental Health Care week. You can do your part by remembering to contact at least one unstable person to show you care. Well, my job is done .....Your turn Spiritual freedom is my birthright. I am a free thinker. I am able to rise above mental prejudices and stereotypes of others. I am a free thinker. Nobody and nothing can manipulate me or deceive me. I am a free thinker. I freely choose truth and love. Today, I embrace a greater degree of spiritual freedom. ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Be a better Heartthrob. Get better relationship answers from someone who knows. Answers - Check it out. http://answers./dir/?link=list & sid=396545433 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 16, 2007 Report Share Posted October 16, 2007 It's a hoot! Lol! ----- Original Message ----- From: Marty Cline martin stompingelk cline Sent: Tuesday, October 16, 2007 12:20 AM Subject: [ ] The State Mental Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital. Please select from the following options menu: If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press2 for you. If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5and 6. If you are paranoid, we know who you are and whatyou want, stay on the line so we can trace yourcall.If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will beforwarded to the Mother Ship. If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press. If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway. If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696. If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have low self-esteem, please hang up our operators are too busy to talk with you. If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. You won't be crazy forever. If you are blonde, don't press any buttons, you'll just mess it up. This coming week is National Mental Health Care week. You can do your part by remembering to contact at least one unstable person to show you care. Well, my job is done .....Your turn Spiritual freedom is my birthright. I am a free thinker. I am able to rise above mentalprejudices and stereotypes of others. I am a free thinker. Nobody and nothing can manipulateme or deceive me. I am a free thinker. I freely choose truth and love. Today, I embrace a greater degree of spiritualfreedom. ____________________________________________________________________________________Be a better Heartthrob. Get better relationship answers from someone who knows. Answers - Check it out. http://answers./dir/?link=list & sid=396545433 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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