A Proven Way That Women Can Quit Drinking Without AA

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Article Title: A Proven Way That Women Can Quit Drinking

Without AA

Author: Jeannie Long

Category: Wellness, Fitness and Diet

Word Count: 1191

Article URL:

http://www.isnare.com/?id=2044 & ca=Wellness%2C+Fitness+and+Diet

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Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) has helped millions of people recover

from alcoholism. For many women, however, AA may not be the best

choice when it comes to the difficult task of quitting drinking.

The main reason it may not be the best choice is this:

AA is based on the philosophy that self-centeredness is the

root of alcoholism. In other words, AA's approach is to

instill humility and minimize egotism in its members.

While this method may have been appropriate for white males in

the 1940's when AA was founded, it does not meet the very

different needs of women. Here's why.

- Women who have a problem with alcohol oftentimes suffer from

feelings of guilt and low self-esteem.

- Women already judge and berate themselves mercilessly.

- What women need to recover is to develop a sense of

competency in themselves and rebuild their feelings of

self-worth.

- Quitting drinking requires overcoming dependencies,

forgetting the past and planning for the future.

SELF EMPOWERMENT, NOT HUMILITY, LEADS TO SOBRIETY

I agree that it is necessary for a woman to have humility in

order to accept that she has a drinking problem. But taking

humility beyond this first step is actually counter productive

for the woman alcoholic.

Kirkpatrick, Ph.D., founder of the Women for Sobriety

Program (WFS), writes that " to accept humility is absolutely

the worst thing that could happen to a woman alcoholic. " From

long experience understood that for women to overcome

feelings of helplessness and powerlessness they must have a

program that helps them to rebuild their self-image.

DOES GIVING YOURSELF UP TO A HIGHER POWER WORK FOR YOU?

The main component of AA's program is spirituality.

Specifically, they believe that in order to recover, one must

surrender one's will to a higher power.

WFS, on the other hand, does not encourage reliance on a higher

power or something outside yourself. Women for Sobriety

believes that your power must come from within.

THE WOMEN FOR SOBRIETY PROGRAM WORKS

This new, empowering method for women to quit drinking produces

concrete results. An interesting study was published in the

American Journal of Drug and Alcohol Abuse by L. A. Kaskutas in

1996.

What the study found was that after women became really aware

that they had to do something about their drinking, the

percentage of women who were sober within 1 year after

attending Women for Sobriety meetings was 38%. In contrast,

the percentage of women who were sober within 1 year after

attending Alcoholics Anonymous meetings was 26%.

WHY HAVEN'T I HEARD OF WFS?

One of the reasons why AA meetings are so prevalent is the fact

that one aspect of their spiritual philosophy is a strong

emphasis on service. Specifically, AA members are encouraged

to attend meetings for life, and be part of a sponsorship

program where experienced members assist beginners.

In contrast, because WFS encourages self-sufficiency, it does

not promote lifelong attendance at meetings. Also, although WFS

does not have a formal sponsorship program, it encourages an

informal support structure among the women. A result of this

WFS philosophy of leading women away from dependencies is that

meetings are not as widely found with the Women for Sobriety

Program as they are with AA.

The Women for Sobriety web site does, however, provide support

in the form of on-line meetings, chat, and a bulletin board.

They also have a large collection of popular books on recovery

as well as their own literature for sale. This contrasts with

AA meetings where only AA approved literature is allowed.

WFS MEETINGS ENCOURAGE CONVERSATION BETWEEN WOMEN

I like that WFS permits a wide range of meeting topics. And

one of the best aspects of the WFS meeting format is that

conversation is encouraged whereas AA has a strict " no

cross-talk " rule during meetings.

Another difference between WFS and AA is that one-third of WFS

members also attend AA meetings because they need more frequent

meetings to stay sober and they like the fellowship and support.

Women for Sobriety is open to this approach and, in fact,

states that their Program " can be used with or without AA. "

AA, however, tends to discourage attendance at alternative

programs. This can be seen through some of the wording in the

introductory portion of the meeting where it is stated, " rarely

have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our

path, " and, later: " many of us thought we could find an

easier, softer way. But we could not. "

WOMEN'S REACTIONS AFTER ATTENDING THEIR FIRST WFS MEETING

Power comes from looking forward not back. It is very

important for women to have a positive, proactive force

supporting them when it comes to quitting drinking. This is

different than the AA approach of focusing on negative memories

of the past to prevent drinking in the future.

A classic example of this is I have had many women come to my

Women for Sobriety group and tell me that after hearing a

person's drinking story at an AA speaker meeting, they felt so

badly when leaving the meeting that they just wanted to go out

and drink. In contrast, many women share with me that they feel

positive and hopeful for the future when they get out of our WFS

meeting.

WHERE YOU CAN LEARN MORE

If you are curious about learning more about the Women for

Sobriety Program, click on the link I've provided below. There

you will find some resources that I have put together for you.

Some of these resources include:

- Statistics on reasons why women like or dislike WFS and AA

- Specific details about the entire Women for Sobriety Program

- A revealing book describing the AA Program from a woman's

perspective

- Why the Women for Sobriety Program may not be for you

http://www.ajpip.com/addictions/site_map.htm

AA has been responsible for helping women get and remain sober

for many years and I applaud their efforts. However, I spent 3

years in and out of AA at the beginning of my sobriety and I was

never able to get my heart into the program.

During that 3 years I purchased and read all the WFS literature

and finally engaged the help of a private therapist. When I

finally got empowered enough to start a WFS meeting in my area,

my ability to stay sober became permanent.

I DID IT, YOU CAN DO IT TOO!

I have been sober for 8 years now. I attribute my continuous

sobriety to several things that the WFS Program revealed to me:

- The importance of getting to know myself and the reasons why

I drank

- How to develop a lasting positive self-image

- The power was within me to pursue my true interests

- That long-term sobriety is possible with the support of

like-minded women in my WFS group

Jeannie Long

About The Author: Jeannie Long now enjoys 8 years of continuous

sobriety. She leads a weekly support group for women using the

Women for Sobriety Program. She helps women achieve better

physical and mental health through her health related web sites

and newsletters. To read about the subjects covered in Jeannie's

Commit to Recovery newsletter, click on the following link:

http://www.ajpip.com/addictions/anopi/dir/jncrb.htm

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