Hello everyone

[Guest guest]

Hello Catgrrl522. I'ts unbelievable how many people don't seem to care, especially teachers and one's own parents at times. Being called stupid, manipulative, selfish, seeking attention(I hated when they said that one in particular), and all those things. Believe me when I say I know exactly what it's like to be mislabeled, discarded as waste, rejected from all my peers, and spat upon because of social "Inadequacy". In reality, Aspies see deep down, exactly what goes on with another's body language and tone of voice. In reality Aspies are highly intuitive. In reality, Aspies are more advanced in many areas than the average Neuro-typical. I've, at times wondered what all those nasty teenagers and teachers would feel if I came back and told them in the most polite way possible that I was born different from them because of a social disorder, and more capable of forgiving them now that I don't blame myself for every little blunder I made. I would tell them all how

I am freed from the confusion that made me hate myself. Even if I did that, it would be up to each one of those people to actually listen. I believe some of them would listen and some would not. That's not the point. The point is, I lead my own life after diagnosis. I am what I am. Accept it or get out of my space. One has to wonder though, what impact on society those bullies and the silent, enablers have nowadays. Wouldn't it be reasonable to say over the last 60 years, many have become psychologists, psychiatrists, Diagnosers/labelers? Wouldn't it be safe to say that these people are relatively the same in terms of not standing up for others and/or bullying their way up the corporate chain in many sectors.Isn't it safe to say that Us Aspies have accepted some "Official diagnosis" instead of going after the real causations? Words are no doubt powerful. Hurtful words that mostly emphasize weakness ( in my opinion) are given as parts to the whole of the diagnosis

of an Aspie. Societal conditioning. That's exactly what it is. The world would be alot better of a place if there were no sexists, weak politicians, lobbyists, wars, terrorists, bullies, uncaring teachers, liars, goof-offs etc......... It's so common, the herd mentality. Even if people know about a bully, most of the time ( from my experience) no one will stand up for the one being bullied. They stay silent, unprovoking because they know if they try to get the bully to shut up, theyr'e likely to get attacked by the bully or other bullies. In this way, they are just like the bullies, uncaring and cruel, like watching someone kill another person and not doing something about it, just standing there emotionless as a grave. I've developed some skills to stop bullies from using their words as bullets. I look them square in the eye, raise my hand to indicate that she or he needs to shut up and take every advantage possible to indicate that I did not appreciate his or her

attitude towards me and that they are worthless. Kill or be killed is the one and only way to get at bullies. I'm not saying kill them literally! I just mean bring their ego down to size, where it belongs. If that doesn't happen, sorry! I hate to break the news and be at risk of someone calling me "Anti-social/depraved" etc., but the only way to beat the enemy and not let harm come to one's self is by destroying the enemy's ego. This shouldn't be news to anybody. It's simply survival instinct. Let me make a distinction here. Survival Instinct is totally different from herd instinct. Herd instinct is likened unto tolerance of bad, evil things because keeping a clean-looking business is the best way to get customers. Herd instinct is simply conformity. Survival instinct is simply choosing words and body langauge as weapons against a misguided person's deceptive, fear-invoking. essentially evil, bullying. It works. Have you had experiences similar to what I had in the past?

If so, what were they?, If you don't mind my asking. catgrrl522 <catgrrl522@...> wrote:

I haven't posted here in a while, I've been really busy. I hope you all are well. Some of you who remember me might remember I was self-diagnosed with AS. A couple of days ago I finally got my official diagnosis, and have been trying to think how I feel about it. Mostly I feel just the same as I always have, but also vindicated towards all the people in my life who've said I was "imagining things," I just needed to "make an effort," I was "too smart" to be acting that way!, I shouldn't be so "shy," I shouldn't "hide behind a book," I was just "stubborn," "acting out," "seeking attention," "spoiled," "manipulative," it's "all in your head" and there's "really nothing wrong with you!" Well, they were right on the last one. There is nothing "wrong" with me. I just have Asperger's Syndrome. There's a REASON I do all those things

you don't understand.So, I am mostly feeling good right now. Anyone else have similar feelings after being diagnosed?Kitty__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Inger,

Nothing to be sorry about.

I'm surrounded by human hubris and being a modest fellow, I seem to be inundated and swamped by it.

If truth be known I have realised for quite sometime that I am the minority. A vast minority.

Shaun.Inger Lorelei <inglori@...> wrote:

Shaun wrote:> My problem is that I am swimming in a sea of intellectual mediocrity.

ROTFL!

Sorry, I know that must be frustrating beyond words, but I just found that sentence so delightfully humorous.

My sympathies.

Inger

for Good Click here to donate to the Hurricane Katrina relief effort.

[Guest guest]

Inger,

Nothing to be sorry about.

I'm surrounded by human hubris and being a modest fellow, I seem to be inundated and swamped by it.

If truth be known I have realised for quite sometime that I am the minority. A vast minority.

Shaun.Inger Lorelei <inglori@...> wrote:

Shaun wrote:> My problem is that I am swimming in a sea of intellectual mediocrity.

ROTFL!

Sorry, I know that must be frustrating beyond words, but I just found that sentence so delightfully humorous.

My sympathies.

Inger

for Good Click here to donate to the Hurricane Katrina relief effort.

[Guest guest]

Inger,

Nothing to be sorry about.

I'm surrounded by human hubris and being a modest fellow, I seem to be inundated and swamped by it.

If truth be known I have realised for quite sometime that I am the minority. A vast minority.

Shaun.Inger Lorelei <inglori@...> wrote:

Shaun wrote:> My problem is that I am swimming in a sea of intellectual mediocrity.

ROTFL!

Sorry, I know that must be frustrating beyond words, but I just found that sentence so delightfully humorous.

My sympathies.

Inger

for Good Click here to donate to the Hurricane Katrina relief effort.

[Guest guest]

Interesting post :-)

I have not got a diagnosis yet - but I can agree with a lot of what

you are saying. I have come across attitudes that AS does not even

exsist and that it is just an excuse - I have even had my mother

accuse me of trying to be different! Not the case.

Then you have some that believe AS is a terrible disease/disability -

that we are retarded. The belief in refrigerator mums still exsists

even now - some still believe in the old belief that autism is a

phycosis despite modern evidence against this old and outdated

belief - and they say that Aspies do not like change - I think there

are many non-Aspies that are narrow minded and unlikely to change

thier minds - despite mounting evidence to the contrary of thier

beliefs.

" In reality Aspies are highly intuitive. "

I have noticed this too :-)

" One has to wonder though, what impact on society those bullies and

the silent, enablers have nowadays. Wouldn't it be reasonable to say

over the last 60 years, many have become psychologists,

psychiatrists, Diagnosers/labelers? Wouldn't it be safe to say that

these people are relatively the same in terms of not standing up for

others and/or bullying their way up the corporate chain in many

sectors. "

Yep - some are running support groups and claiming to be helping

whilst actually trying to keep Aspies down and trying to keep Aspies

victims and in their (what they see) place.

Their private beliefs on Aspies are unbelievable in some cases - like

the belief that Aspies cannot have thier own voice and therefore such

a person with such a belief in my opinion is a control freak and

seeking to put others down rather than helping.

They have the guise of caring and helping and so called empathy - but

just question their motives and if one has the ability of seeing

through them it does not go down well - to fit in such a construct

one has to remain the victim - and I don't intend to do that :-) I'm

too rebellious for a start :-) Such people are not accepting and seek

to control and manipulate - they create constructs and they

personally decide what is wrong and right and expect everyone else to

blindly accept this - if one doesn't, then one is not playing the

game and is met with anger etc and eventually rejected - not very

accepting methinks.

" Survival instinct is simply choosing words and body langauge as

weapons against a misguided person's deceptive, fear-invoking.

essentially evil, bullying. It works. Have you had experiences

similar to what I had in the past? If so, what were they?, If you

don't mind my asking. "

Well I do not know what experiences you have had - or who this

question was directed at - but I have experienced bullying in quite

few different forms. One such is 'put downs' - to supposedly keep one

in their supposed place I would expect. I have known one such person

(amognst many) to use such a tactic - a non-autistic person running a

support group for Aspies. They often poked fun at autism - and had a

go at autistic traits - this was done under the guise of joking - I

questioned this - as I cannot always tell whether people are joking

or not. My questioning as to whether such things really were jokes

was met with anger - strange re-action and made me wonder whether

they really were jokes - I do not particularly find it funny putting

others down.

I have also defended others when I have been witness to such things -

I have not found it funny, nor laughed - I have pointed out that such

behaviour is not nice. My defence is generally met by anger - only on

the occasions where a person did not mean offence and was geniunly

joking then my questioning and defence is not met with anger - but

usually a sincere apology that they did not mean it.

Perhaps this is the difference between Aspies and non Aspies? Aspies

are often accused of causing offence - but I would say generally it

is not intentional and if I realise I have caused offence to another

inadvertantly by how I have worded something - I instantly apologise

and try to explain what I meant - whereas a lot of the time with non-

Aspies offence is intended - although they often dress it up under

the guise of something else - like joking and thier re-actions to

thier motives being questioned usually reveals their true colours -

true intent :-)

> Hello Catgrrl522. I'ts unbelievable how many people don't seem to

care, especially teachers and one's own parents at times. Being

called stupid, manipulative, selfish, seeking attention(I hated when

they said that one in particular), and all those things. Believe me

when I say I know exactly what it's like to be mislabeled, discarded

as waste, rejected from all my peers, and spat upon because of

social " Inadequacy " . In reality, Aspies see deep down, exactly what

goes on with another's body language and tone of voice. In reality

Aspies are highly intuitive. In reality, Aspies are more advanced in

many areas than the average Neuro-typical. I've, at times wondered

what all those nasty teenagers and teachers would feel if I came back

and told them in the most polite way possible that I was born

different from them because of a social disorder, and more capable of

forgiving them now that I don't blame myself for every little blunder

I made. I would tell them all how I am freed from the

> confusion that made me hate myself. Even if I did that, it would

be up to each one of those people to actually listen. I believe some

of them would listen and some would not. That's not the point. The

point is, I lead my own life after diagnosis. I am what I am. Accept

it or get out of my space. One has to wonder though, what impact on

society those bullies and the silent, enablers have nowadays.

Wouldn't it be reasonable to say over the last 60 years, many have

become psychologists, psychiatrists, Diagnosers/labelers? Wouldn't it

be safe to say that these people are relatively the same in terms of

not standing up for others and/or bullying their way up the corporate

chain in many sectors.Isn't it safe to say that Us Aspies have

accepted some " Official diagnosis " instead of going after the real

causations? Words are no doubt powerful. Hurtful words that mostly

emphasize weakness ( in my opinion) are given as parts to the whole

of the diagnosis of an Aspie. Societal conditioning.

> That's exactly what it is. The world would be alot better of a

place if there were no sexists, weak politicians, lobbyists, wars,

terrorists, bullies, uncaring teachers, liars, goof-offs etc.........

It's so common, the herd mentality. Even if people know about a

bully, most of the time ( from my experience) no one will stand up

for the one being bullied. They stay silent, unprovoking because they

know if they try to get the bully to shut up, theyr'e likely to get

attacked by the bully or other bullies. In this way, they are just

like the bullies, uncaring and cruel, like watching someone kill

another person and not doing something about it, just standing there

emotionless as a grave. I've developed some skills to stop bullies

from using their words as bullets. I look them square in the eye,

raise my hand to indicate that she or he needs to shut up and take

every advantage possible to indicate that I did not appreciate his or

her attitude towards me and that they are worthless. Kill

> or be killed is the one and only way to get at bullies. I'm not

saying kill them literally! I just mean bring their ego down to size,

where it belongs. If that doesn't happen, sorry! I hate to break the

news and be at risk of someone calling me " Anti-social/depraved "

etc., but the only way to beat the enemy and not let harm come to

one's self is by destroying the enemy's ego. This shouldn't be news

to anybody. It's simply survival instinct. Let me make a distinction

here. Survival Instinct is totally different from herd instinct. Herd

instinct is likened unto tolerance of bad, evil things because

keeping a clean-looking business is the best way to get customers.

Herd instinct is simply conformity. Survival instinct is simply

choosing words and body langauge as weapons against a misguided

person's deceptive, fear-invoking. essentially evil, bullying. It

works. Have you had experiences similar to what I had in the past? If

so, what were they?, If you don't mind my asking.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Interesting post :-)

I have not got a diagnosis yet - but I can agree with a lot of what

you are saying. I have come across attitudes that AS does not even

exsist and that it is just an excuse - I have even had my mother

accuse me of trying to be different! Not the case.

Then you have some that believe AS is a terrible disease/disability -

that we are retarded. The belief in refrigerator mums still exsists

even now - some still believe in the old belief that autism is a

phycosis despite modern evidence against this old and outdated

belief - and they say that Aspies do not like change - I think there

are many non-Aspies that are narrow minded and unlikely to change

thier minds - despite mounting evidence to the contrary of thier

beliefs.

" In reality Aspies are highly intuitive. "

I have noticed this too :-)

" One has to wonder though, what impact on society those bullies and

the silent, enablers have nowadays. Wouldn't it be reasonable to say

over the last 60 years, many have become psychologists,

psychiatrists, Diagnosers/labelers? Wouldn't it be safe to say that

these people are relatively the same in terms of not standing up for

others and/or bullying their way up the corporate chain in many

sectors. "

Yep - some are running support groups and claiming to be helping

whilst actually trying to keep Aspies down and trying to keep Aspies

victims and in their (what they see) place.

Their private beliefs on Aspies are unbelievable in some cases - like

the belief that Aspies cannot have thier own voice and therefore such

a person with such a belief in my opinion is a control freak and

seeking to put others down rather than helping.

They have the guise of caring and helping and so called empathy - but

just question their motives and if one has the ability of seeing

through them it does not go down well - to fit in such a construct

one has to remain the victim - and I don't intend to do that :-) I'm

too rebellious for a start :-) Such people are not accepting and seek

to control and manipulate - they create constructs and they

personally decide what is wrong and right and expect everyone else to

blindly accept this - if one doesn't, then one is not playing the

game and is met with anger etc and eventually rejected - not very

accepting methinks.

" Survival instinct is simply choosing words and body langauge as

weapons against a misguided person's deceptive, fear-invoking.

essentially evil, bullying. It works. Have you had experiences

similar to what I had in the past? If so, what were they?, If you

don't mind my asking. "

Well I do not know what experiences you have had - or who this

question was directed at - but I have experienced bullying in quite

few different forms. One such is 'put downs' - to supposedly keep one

in their supposed place I would expect. I have known one such person

(amognst many) to use such a tactic - a non-autistic person running a

support group for Aspies. They often poked fun at autism - and had a

go at autistic traits - this was done under the guise of joking - I

questioned this - as I cannot always tell whether people are joking

or not. My questioning as to whether such things really were jokes

was met with anger - strange re-action and made me wonder whether

they really were jokes - I do not particularly find it funny putting

others down.

I have also defended others when I have been witness to such things -

I have not found it funny, nor laughed - I have pointed out that such

behaviour is not nice. My defence is generally met by anger - only on

the occasions where a person did not mean offence and was geniunly

joking then my questioning and defence is not met with anger - but

usually a sincere apology that they did not mean it.

Perhaps this is the difference between Aspies and non Aspies? Aspies

are often accused of causing offence - but I would say generally it

is not intentional and if I realise I have caused offence to another

inadvertantly by how I have worded something - I instantly apologise

and try to explain what I meant - whereas a lot of the time with non-

Aspies offence is intended - although they often dress it up under

the guise of something else - like joking and thier re-actions to

thier motives being questioned usually reveals their true colours -

true intent :-)

> Hello Catgrrl522. I'ts unbelievable how many people don't seem to

care, especially teachers and one's own parents at times. Being

called stupid, manipulative, selfish, seeking attention(I hated when

they said that one in particular), and all those things. Believe me

when I say I know exactly what it's like to be mislabeled, discarded

as waste, rejected from all my peers, and spat upon because of

social " Inadequacy " . In reality, Aspies see deep down, exactly what

goes on with another's body language and tone of voice. In reality

Aspies are highly intuitive. In reality, Aspies are more advanced in

many areas than the average Neuro-typical. I've, at times wondered

what all those nasty teenagers and teachers would feel if I came back

and told them in the most polite way possible that I was born

different from them because of a social disorder, and more capable of

forgiving them now that I don't blame myself for every little blunder

I made. I would tell them all how I am freed from the

> confusion that made me hate myself. Even if I did that, it would

be up to each one of those people to actually listen. I believe some

of them would listen and some would not. That's not the point. The

point is, I lead my own life after diagnosis. I am what I am. Accept

it or get out of my space. One has to wonder though, what impact on

society those bullies and the silent, enablers have nowadays.

Wouldn't it be reasonable to say over the last 60 years, many have

become psychologists, psychiatrists, Diagnosers/labelers? Wouldn't it

be safe to say that these people are relatively the same in terms of

not standing up for others and/or bullying their way up the corporate

chain in many sectors.Isn't it safe to say that Us Aspies have

accepted some " Official diagnosis " instead of going after the real

causations? Words are no doubt powerful. Hurtful words that mostly

emphasize weakness ( in my opinion) are given as parts to the whole

of the diagnosis of an Aspie. Societal conditioning.

> That's exactly what it is. The world would be alot better of a

place if there were no sexists, weak politicians, lobbyists, wars,

terrorists, bullies, uncaring teachers, liars, goof-offs etc.........

It's so common, the herd mentality. Even if people know about a

bully, most of the time ( from my experience) no one will stand up

for the one being bullied. They stay silent, unprovoking because they

know if they try to get the bully to shut up, theyr'e likely to get

attacked by the bully or other bullies. In this way, they are just

like the bullies, uncaring and cruel, like watching someone kill

another person and not doing something about it, just standing there

emotionless as a grave. I've developed some skills to stop bullies

from using their words as bullets. I look them square in the eye,

raise my hand to indicate that she or he needs to shut up and take

every advantage possible to indicate that I did not appreciate his or

her attitude towards me and that they are worthless. Kill

> or be killed is the one and only way to get at bullies. I'm not

saying kill them literally! I just mean bring their ego down to size,

where it belongs. If that doesn't happen, sorry! I hate to break the

news and be at risk of someone calling me " Anti-social/depraved "

etc., but the only way to beat the enemy and not let harm come to

one's self is by destroying the enemy's ego. This shouldn't be news

to anybody. It's simply survival instinct. Let me make a distinction

here. Survival Instinct is totally different from herd instinct. Herd

instinct is likened unto tolerance of bad, evil things because

keeping a clean-looking business is the best way to get customers.

Herd instinct is simply conformity. Survival instinct is simply

choosing words and body langauge as weapons against a misguided

person's deceptive, fear-invoking. essentially evil, bullying. It

works. Have you had experiences similar to what I had in the past? If

so, what were they?, If you don't mind my asking.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Interesting post :-)

I have not got a diagnosis yet - but I can agree with a lot of what

you are saying. I have come across attitudes that AS does not even

exsist and that it is just an excuse - I have even had my mother

accuse me of trying to be different! Not the case.

Then you have some that believe AS is a terrible disease/disability -

that we are retarded. The belief in refrigerator mums still exsists

even now - some still believe in the old belief that autism is a

phycosis despite modern evidence against this old and outdated

belief - and they say that Aspies do not like change - I think there

are many non-Aspies that are narrow minded and unlikely to change

thier minds - despite mounting evidence to the contrary of thier

beliefs.

" In reality Aspies are highly intuitive. "

I have noticed this too :-)

" One has to wonder though, what impact on society those bullies and

the silent, enablers have nowadays. Wouldn't it be reasonable to say

over the last 60 years, many have become psychologists,

psychiatrists, Diagnosers/labelers? Wouldn't it be safe to say that

these people are relatively the same in terms of not standing up for

others and/or bullying their way up the corporate chain in many

sectors. "

Yep - some are running support groups and claiming to be helping

whilst actually trying to keep Aspies down and trying to keep Aspies

victims and in their (what they see) place.

Their private beliefs on Aspies are unbelievable in some cases - like

the belief that Aspies cannot have thier own voice and therefore such

a person with such a belief in my opinion is a control freak and

seeking to put others down rather than helping.

They have the guise of caring and helping and so called empathy - but

just question their motives and if one has the ability of seeing

through them it does not go down well - to fit in such a construct

one has to remain the victim - and I don't intend to do that :-) I'm

too rebellious for a start :-) Such people are not accepting and seek

to control and manipulate - they create constructs and they

personally decide what is wrong and right and expect everyone else to

blindly accept this - if one doesn't, then one is not playing the

game and is met with anger etc and eventually rejected - not very

accepting methinks.

" Survival instinct is simply choosing words and body langauge as

weapons against a misguided person's deceptive, fear-invoking.

essentially evil, bullying. It works. Have you had experiences

similar to what I had in the past? If so, what were they?, If you

don't mind my asking. "

Well I do not know what experiences you have had - or who this

question was directed at - but I have experienced bullying in quite

few different forms. One such is 'put downs' - to supposedly keep one

in their supposed place I would expect. I have known one such person

(amognst many) to use such a tactic - a non-autistic person running a

support group for Aspies. They often poked fun at autism - and had a

go at autistic traits - this was done under the guise of joking - I

questioned this - as I cannot always tell whether people are joking

or not. My questioning as to whether such things really were jokes

was met with anger - strange re-action and made me wonder whether

they really were jokes - I do not particularly find it funny putting

others down.

I have also defended others when I have been witness to such things -

I have not found it funny, nor laughed - I have pointed out that such

behaviour is not nice. My defence is generally met by anger - only on

the occasions where a person did not mean offence and was geniunly

joking then my questioning and defence is not met with anger - but

usually a sincere apology that they did not mean it.

Perhaps this is the difference between Aspies and non Aspies? Aspies

are often accused of causing offence - but I would say generally it

is not intentional and if I realise I have caused offence to another

inadvertantly by how I have worded something - I instantly apologise

and try to explain what I meant - whereas a lot of the time with non-

Aspies offence is intended - although they often dress it up under

the guise of something else - like joking and thier re-actions to

thier motives being questioned usually reveals their true colours -

true intent :-)

> Hello Catgrrl522. I'ts unbelievable how many people don't seem to

care, especially teachers and one's own parents at times. Being

called stupid, manipulative, selfish, seeking attention(I hated when

they said that one in particular), and all those things. Believe me

when I say I know exactly what it's like to be mislabeled, discarded

as waste, rejected from all my peers, and spat upon because of

social " Inadequacy " . In reality, Aspies see deep down, exactly what

goes on with another's body language and tone of voice. In reality

Aspies are highly intuitive. In reality, Aspies are more advanced in

many areas than the average Neuro-typical. I've, at times wondered

what all those nasty teenagers and teachers would feel if I came back

and told them in the most polite way possible that I was born

different from them because of a social disorder, and more capable of

forgiving them now that I don't blame myself for every little blunder

I made. I would tell them all how I am freed from the

> confusion that made me hate myself. Even if I did that, it would

be up to each one of those people to actually listen. I believe some

of them would listen and some would not. That's not the point. The

point is, I lead my own life after diagnosis. I am what I am. Accept

it or get out of my space. One has to wonder though, what impact on

society those bullies and the silent, enablers have nowadays.

Wouldn't it be reasonable to say over the last 60 years, many have

become psychologists, psychiatrists, Diagnosers/labelers? Wouldn't it

be safe to say that these people are relatively the same in terms of

not standing up for others and/or bullying their way up the corporate

chain in many sectors.Isn't it safe to say that Us Aspies have

accepted some " Official diagnosis " instead of going after the real

causations? Words are no doubt powerful. Hurtful words that mostly

emphasize weakness ( in my opinion) are given as parts to the whole

of the diagnosis of an Aspie. Societal conditioning.

> That's exactly what it is. The world would be alot better of a

place if there were no sexists, weak politicians, lobbyists, wars,

terrorists, bullies, uncaring teachers, liars, goof-offs etc.........

It's so common, the herd mentality. Even if people know about a

bully, most of the time ( from my experience) no one will stand up

for the one being bullied. They stay silent, unprovoking because they

know if they try to get the bully to shut up, theyr'e likely to get

attacked by the bully or other bullies. In this way, they are just

like the bullies, uncaring and cruel, like watching someone kill

another person and not doing something about it, just standing there

emotionless as a grave. I've developed some skills to stop bullies

from using their words as bullets. I look them square in the eye,

raise my hand to indicate that she or he needs to shut up and take

every advantage possible to indicate that I did not appreciate his or

her attitude towards me and that they are worthless. Kill

> or be killed is the one and only way to get at bullies. I'm not

saying kill them literally! I just mean bring their ego down to size,

where it belongs. If that doesn't happen, sorry! I hate to break the

news and be at risk of someone calling me " Anti-social/depraved "

etc., but the only way to beat the enemy and not let harm come to

one's self is by destroying the enemy's ego. This shouldn't be news

to anybody. It's simply survival instinct. Let me make a distinction

here. Survival Instinct is totally different from herd instinct. Herd

instinct is likened unto tolerance of bad, evil things because

keeping a clean-looking business is the best way to get customers.

Herd instinct is simply conformity. Survival instinct is simply

choosing words and body langauge as weapons against a misguided

person's deceptive, fear-invoking. essentially evil, bullying. It

works. Have you had experiences similar to what I had in the past? If

so, what were they?, If you don't mind my asking.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Kitty: "So, I am mostly feeling good right now."I haven't heard this line around here before! I'm so glad for you.Although not diagnosed, I do share your sentiment.  Rainbow

[Guest guest]

Kitty: "So, I am mostly feeling good right now."I haven't heard this line around here before! I'm so glad for you.Although not diagnosed, I do share your sentiment.  Rainbow

[Guest guest]

Well to add to the feel good factor - I was feeling very good

recently - I think it was something to do with the company though ;-)

just didn't have chance to say - as I was too busy feeling good :-)

Here's to feeling good :-)

> Kitty: " So, I am mostly feeling good right now. "

>

> I haven't heard this line around here before! I'm so glad for you.

> Although not diagnosed, I do share your sentiment.

> Rainbow

[Guest guest]

Well to add to the feel good factor - I was feeling very good

recently - I think it was something to do with the company though ;-)

just didn't have chance to say - as I was too busy feeling good :-)

Here's to feeling good :-)

> Kitty: " So, I am mostly feeling good right now. "

>

> I haven't heard this line around here before! I'm so glad for you.

> Although not diagnosed, I do share your sentiment.

> Rainbow

[Guest guest]

>: "Here's to feeling good :-)"Now here's a topic worth exploring! I feel good because I am a survivor, I have my health, my family, my friends, a 'job', a place to live, food to eat, plans for the near and distant future, and the love of my life. All this makes me feel like I don't belong here, but actually I do, and being here with you all has helped me feel better than I have in a long time. Thank you all for sharing your thoughts, feelings,  and experiences. Although I respond to only a very few posts know that much of what many of you say 'hits very close to home'.   Rainbow

[Guest guest]

>: "Here's to feeling good :-)"Now here's a topic worth exploring! I feel good because I am a survivor, I have my health, my family, my friends, a 'job', a place to live, food to eat, plans for the near and distant future, and the love of my life. All this makes me feel like I don't belong here, but actually I do, and being here with you all has helped me feel better than I have in a long time. Thank you all for sharing your thoughts, feelings,  and experiences. Although I respond to only a very few posts know that much of what many of you say 'hits very close to home'.   Rainbow

[Guest guest]

I felt much the same way when I went in for my appointment. What was

interesting, though, was that the things that usually plague me when

meeting people (lack of eye contact, not knowing what to say, where

to sit, lack of interest in small talk, and just general awkwardness)

immediately alerted the doctor to my Aspie-ness. So for once, you

don't have to try to be " normal. "

I hope your appointment goes well and the outcome is satisfying!

Kitty

> Hi Kitty and welcome back.

>

> I have an appointment on Wednesday to find out if I have AS or not -

> at moment am dreading it though. No idea what to excpect - someone

> I've never met and place I haven't been to before :-(

>

>

[Guest guest]

I felt much the same way when I went in for my appointment. What was

interesting, though, was that the things that usually plague me when

meeting people (lack of eye contact, not knowing what to say, where

to sit, lack of interest in small talk, and just general awkwardness)

immediately alerted the doctor to my Aspie-ness. So for once, you

don't have to try to be " normal. "

I hope your appointment goes well and the outcome is satisfying!

Kitty

> Hi Kitty and welcome back.

>

> I have an appointment on Wednesday to find out if I have AS or not -

> at moment am dreading it though. No idea what to excpect - someone

> I've never met and place I haven't been to before :-(

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thing is I am so used to programming to try and act 'normal' although

I fail miserably.

I remember when having to go to a solicitors and trying to act normal

on my way out I walked into a photo-copying machine :-( sometimes the

more I try and act normal the more I screw up. I can come across as

very professional at times - but detached - unapproachable I have

been told.

> > Hi Kitty and welcome back.

> >

> > I have an appointment on Wednesday to find out if I have AS or

not -

>

> > at moment am dreading it though. No idea what to excpect -

someone

> > I've never met and place I haven't been to before :-(

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Thing is I am so used to programming to try and act 'normal' although

I fail miserably.

I remember when having to go to a solicitors and trying to act normal

on my way out I walked into a photo-copying machine :-( sometimes the

more I try and act normal the more I screw up. I can come across as

very professional at times - but detached - unapproachable I have

been told.

> > Hi Kitty and welcome back.

> >

> > I have an appointment on Wednesday to find out if I have AS or

not -

>

> > at moment am dreading it though. No idea what to excpect -

someone

> > I've never met and place I haven't been to before :-(

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Same here .

People think I'm cool and aloof where actually I'm just trying to get through the situation.

Shaun.greebohere <julie.stevenson16@...> wrote:

Thing is I am so used to programming to try and act 'normal' although I fail miserably.I remember when having to go to a solicitors and trying to act normal on my way out I walked into a photo-copying machine :-( sometimes the more I try and act normal the more I screw up. I can come across as very professional at times - but detached - unapproachable I have been told.> > Hi Kitty and welcome back.> > > > I have an appointment on Wednesday to find out if I have AS or not -> > > at moment am dreading it though. No idea what to excpect - someone > > I've never met and place I haven't been to before :-(> > > >

[Guest guest]

Yes, I can do that too sometimes. As long as I don't have to come off

as " friendly " (which just seems a fake way to be for me) I'm usually

okay. Problem is people seem to expect small talk in most contexts,

even those that would be satisfactory as " business-only. " I guess it

makes most people comfortable, though it makes me very uncomfortable.

I hate when people say " just be yourself " to me, but I think for your

dx appointment that would probably be the best approach? I don't think

they will judge you for being AS while diagnosing you for AS, if that

makes any sense. The doctor that dxed me said he saw the traits in me

right away, before he even talked to me.

I do feel bad that I wasn't once able to look him in the eye.

Kitty

> Thing is I am so used to programming to try and act 'normal' although

> I fail miserably.

>

> I remember when having to go to a solicitors and trying to act normal

> on my way out I walked into a photo-copying machine :-( sometimes the

> more I try and act normal the more I screw up. I can come across as

> very professional at times - but detached - unapproachable I have

> been told.

>

>

[Guest guest]

I agree with Kitty, . Just be yourself.

And remember that bumping into copiers while trying to look

competent is a typical Aspie thing. I've done similar.

Tom

I hate when people say " just be yourself " to me, but I think for your

dx appointment that would probably be the best approach? I don't think

they will judge you for being AS while diagnosing you for AS, if that

makes any sense. The doctor that dxed me said he saw the traits in me

right away, before he even talked to me.

I do feel bad that I wasn't once able to look him in the eye.

Kitty

[Guest guest]

LOL! I've done that too!

Inger

Re: Hello everyone

I agree with Kitty, . Just be yourself.

And remember that bumping into copiers while trying to look

competent is a typical Aspie thing. I've done similar.

Tom

I hate when people say " just be yourself " to me, but I think for your

dx appointment that would probably be the best approach? I don't think

they will judge you for being AS while diagnosing you for AS, if that

makes any sense. The doctor that dxed me said he saw the traits in me

right away, before he even talked to me.

I do feel bad that I wasn't once able to look him in the eye.

Kitty

FAM Secret Society is a community based on respect, friendship, support and

acceptance. Everyone is valued.

Don't forget, there are links to other FAM sites on the Links page in the

folder marked " Other FAM Sites. "

[Guest guest]

Rainbow I know how you feel. (Or at least I think I do.) I am

functioning pretty good. I have had my struggles, but most of them

seem to be in the past. I still have my ups and downs, but overall I

feel like I am struggling much less than many people here. So that

makes me sometimes wonder if I am a " real " aspie. (Of course I am

too " functional " to get a dx.) But when I read of what people are

going through it reminds me of what I went through in the past and

makes me feel better about overcoming my difficulties (with almost no

support from others) and being who I am today.

Ilah

> >: " Here's to feeling good :-) "

>

> Now here's a topic worth exploring! I feel good because I am a

> survivor, I have my health, my family, my friends, a 'job', a place

> to live, food to eat, plans for the near and distant future, and

the

> love of my life. All this makes me feel like I don't belong here,

but

> actually I do, and being here with you all has helped me feel

better

> than I have in a long time. Thank you all for sharing your

thoughts,

> feelings, and experiences. Although I respond to only a very few

> posts know that much of what many of you say 'hits very close to

home'.

>

> Rainbow

[Guest guest]

,

As a very ex squaddie of some 10+ years, once qualified & with a valid

survival & Medical as an Offshore Medic contact Aberdeen agencies (in the

phone book or on the net) such as Rigman, TEAM, Atlantic resources Ltd,

Oilfield medics international or contact some of the oil comanpies direct

even to the point of getting them to sponsor you. Just don't sell yourself

short.

Good Luck

Mashford

>From: Sander <dinky123uk@...>

>Reply-

>

>Subject: Hello everyone

>Date: Tue, 27 Sep 2005 02:39:48 +0100 (BST)

>

>

>Hello everyone my name is Sander i am currently

>serving in the royal navy as a staff nurse. I am

>looking at taking the step into civilian life within

>the next year or so i am interested in working as a

>medic on board a oil rig but am having difficulty

>finding a job maybe i am not looking in the right

>place does anybody know a good company to contact with

>regards to this.

>

>Also any other suggestions would be greatly recived as

>for using my skills and working in a forign enviroment

>although volentary work is not an option morgage to

>pay and little people to feed.

>

>

>

>___________________________________________________________

>How much free photo storage do you get? Store your holiday

>snaps for FREE with Photos http://uk.photos.

[Guest guest]

Hi Dave,

Welcome. Your first step to getting offshore, is gaining the necessary

qualifications. You will need at the very least, a survival ticket and

an offshore medics certificate. I am afraid you will have to self fund,

although you should get help through your EVT's. It is very, very

unusual for anyone to secure a job with a company who will then fund

them through the courses. Once you are in the door with a company, they

will then fund your refreshers etc. Most people who start in the

industry have to do the locum bit, to get the experience and their face

known around the bazaars. A job then usually pops up anytime after

about three years. It used to be a case of the old catch 22 situation,

where companies wanted medics with experience, but you coldn't get the

experience without them giving you a chance. At the moment however, the

North Sea is so desperately short of locum medics, that it is not a

problem getting the first trip in.

Companies who do medics courses in the UK are: Capita (BP's preferred

trainer - they will always use a Capita trained medic unless they are

stuck) in Montrose, Interdive in Plymouth, I believe Ex- Med in Hereford

are now running them, the guys from there use this site, so they will be

able to confrim. I think NorthSea Medical Centre also run them in Gt

Yarmouth. You will have to find out from your resettlement officer who

are accredited for getting the money for your EVT's. RGIT Montrose in

Aberdeen run survival courses and I think there are a few others around

the country, but I am not sure who they are.

_____

[Guest guest]

Good day Dave,

You do not mention if you have planned any of the prerequisites for

working as a medic. The absolute minimum for all companies working

in the UK sector would be the HSE Offshore Medic's course and an

Offshore Survival certificate.

I am afraid it's a 'Catch 22' situation. You are unlikely to be

offered a job until you have the papers. But you may be reluctant

to spend a lot of money until you are offered a job. All I can say

is that there are a lot of ex-scablifters on the list who are very

glad that they took the plunge.

Do detail what you have done, it will be easier for us to comment

then.

If you wish to contact me off the list, feel free.

Nigel

>

> Hello everyone my name is Sander i am currently

> serving in the royal navy as a staff nurse. I am

> looking at taking the step into civilian life within

> the next year or so i am interested in working as a

> medic on board a oil rig but am having difficulty

> finding a job maybe ...