Confused, tired and emotional

[Guest guest]

At risk of a really long email, i'll start at the beginning. I've been a 'tired'

person since my teens but since I had quite a traumatic time (which I wont go

into here) I have always put this down to stress. This is usually interspersed

with high periods where I feel like I have ants in my pants. When I was 22 (i am

30 now), I suddenly put on a vast amount of weight and shortly after had my

first seizure and shortly after was diagnosed with epilepsy (eeg & mri normal

but the diagnosis was made after medical staff observed several fits in

hospital). Two and a half years ago, I had my daughter and all the symptoms

became ramped up, despite breast feeding, I gained 2st and began having panic

attacks esp at night when I would wake up unable to breathe. This was blamed on

pnd. I then lost a vast amount of weight despite eating more and suddenly had

loads of energy again although the panic/anxiety persisted so I started seeing a

therapist. I have been oscillating like this ever since although have with the

help of the terapist learned to manage the anxiety symptoms and so my life began

to improve. I began an MA (which has been going very well) and became more

comfortable as a mum. I have a lovely circle of friends and a loving husband

(this is not showing off but to show that I am not living in circumstances that

would cause depression).

Then I had a Mirena coil fitted. Since this has happened, it is like a

magnifying glass has been put on my symptoms - My eyes are swollen and have

become different sizes and the optician said my tears aren't working properly,

there is permanent pressure around them and my face is swollen and yellow, my

shoulder is incredibly painful and two of my fingers are numb, I am so tired

that I can barely climb the stairs and I am weak to the point of exhaustion. All

this makes me want to cry esp since my TSh came back normal (1.3) which lead my

doctor to tell me that I am depressed and need anti-depressants/therapy (all

this with no physical exam whatsoever). In a bizzare twist, my therapist is so

worried about my physical health, she advised me to change doctors and get a

second opinion. He check my heartrate (very high), throat (enlarged) and blood

pressure (normal). He said he thinks I have a hormone problem and now i'm having

among other things several thyroid tests (but I don't know what) which take up

to 10 days to come back. I am terrified that if nothing shows up, I will be

labelled a crank, meanwile every day I feel more ill and the thought of waiting

10 days is a nightmare. I just want to live my happy and fulfilling life without

being written off as depressed again. The only thing that is making me miserable

are the physical symptoms and not the other way around. I am scared that I am

unable to look after my daughter properly...how ill do you need to be before

someone helps. Oh and my aunt had Hashimoto's.

Sorry this has been such a long post, i've been holding this all in for a long

time.