Guest guest Posted August 19, 2008 Report Share Posted August 19, 2008 Yes, Nora...it is as simple as just making a phone call and asking to talk to someone about housing and requesting to see an agency's group homes... I have never found an agency that said no... Ellen Ellen Garber Bronfeld egskb@... Re: about group homes How do you tour group homes? Do you just call agencies and ask if you can tour. I would love to do that although it would be challenging as I do not drive. How many have you been in. I have learned about some good alternatives to group homes and am working on learning more about them. Thanks Nora In a message dated 8/18/2008 8:00:01 AM Central Daylight Time, cmfinato@... writes: Nora, As part of high school transitioning, I have been touring group homes (it currently is not needed). It's the 'norm' that 'adults' share a room (which is what I hate). The government doesn't force other individuals that require housing to 'share a room' (except convicted felons, but our loved ones are not convicted felons), so why should those with disabilities be 'forced' **************It's only a deal if it's where you want to go. Find your travel deal here. (http://information.travel.aol.com/deals?ncid=aoltrv00050000000047) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 19, 2008 Report Share Posted August 19, 2008 Well put, Ellen. I'd like to emphasize your remark " should have choices in where, with whom, and how they live. " I'm in favor of having housing choices, and yet I see that everyone has some housing choices within their budget, and sometimes within other limitations (distance to work or relatives). I'm not sure that everyone who is a parent sees that if a kid grew up in a wealthy town, that it might not be possible to find housing in that town. And that is " normal " . How many of us, once we left home, got our own tiny apartment, rather than the 3-bedroom house our parents had? It's typical for adults to not have the same standard of living as their parents, who had many years to acquire their housing and amenities. Unfortunately, for a lot of young people (disabled or not), that means that it is very difficult to find anything within their county that is affordable. For adults with DD, this causes huge problems, because so many programs are based on geography, especially based within a county. We'd like our kids to move into lovely places so they don't have to move again, but I think that's making assumptions. It assumes that our kids won't want to move to someplace else or something different. There's a lot of emotions behind our dreams, and the biggest one is " I want to make sure everything will work out after I'm no longer here. " I understand that emotion, and I feel it too, but I don't think that guaranteeing that our kids' lives will be trouble-free is a realistic expectation. I absolutely agree with you that the system is broken, and if that is the only thing that we communicate to our state legislators in the coming year, we'll have achieved much. My guess is that in 5-10 years the huge mess IL is in regarding services for adults with DD will be so bad that it will be on the radar of the general public throughout the state. -Gail From: Ellen Bronfeld <egskbsbcglobal (DOT) net> Subject: Re: about group homes IPADDUnite@gro ups.com Date: Sunday, August 17, 2008, 2:33 PM Since we are not quite there yet, I too would love to hear more about group homes. Nora, I agree completely about shared rooms, but then don't get me started about 7-8 people living in one house, to begin with!!! There had been some legislation on the table about group homes being limited in size (no more than 4 people) with everyone having their own bedrooms, but it didn't get passed. The problem in legislating this is that then every agency will go out and purchase homes for 4 people, when indeed, some individuals (especially those with autism) do much better with only 1 or two roommates and some may really need to be alone with a support person...so, sometimes you have to be careful what you wish for... That said, shared bedrooms, 3 or 4 people to a bathroom...these are not acceptable living conditions, in my opinion. Funding being what it is, I get the fact that there is no money to do better...for families who can afford it, shared cost vis a vis, families purchasing a house or condo and providing funds for much of the upkeep and maintenance may be a good idea...it will give you some leverage to get what you want in terms of number of individuals in the house, quality of staff (maybe) etc...for those who cannot afford it, these are VERY challenging and disturbing times in which to try to create positive, quality living arrangements for our beloved children. The one thing that people with limited resources might be able to do, is to volunteer, be on boards and committees of local agencies that do the best job of providing housing supports and services in your area...Kind of like donation " in kind " ...though everyone should be treated equally in the system, the fact is, especially in times of very limited resources, those who give more, get more... Ellen Ellen Garber Bronfeld egskbsbcglobal (DOT) net about group homes I think I asked this question before but am going to post on a popular blog about housing issues and need more info. I am looking for info on group homes in IL. Two of my three brothers live in group homes. I like one way better than the other but I have some issues with both of them. First, I don't think grown men should have to share a room and second I don't think group homes should close on the holidays. I understand alot of this is due to funding.. My older brother lives on his own in section 8 housing. My other brothers are not quite able to live on their own. I am looking to hear about people's experiences with group homes in general and specifically about group homes in IL. Thanks Nora ************ **Looking for a car that's sporty, fun and fits in your budget? Read reviews on AOL Autos. (http://autos. aol.com/cars- Volkswagen- Jetta-2009/ expert-review? ncid=aolaut00030 000000007 ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 19, 2008 Report Share Posted August 19, 2008 There is no question that the system is broken and Illinois is terrible. As a parent I do have high expectations but know that there are so few choices if any, if I want to place my son outside of my home. I will keep him with me as long as possible, maybe things will change and they will build more living centers. I would hope that someday there will be more choices. I do believe that there should be. I do not want a separate home for my son, but I know he would love his own space and own room if he moves out. He loves people and he would be happy living with 1 or several other men or women, but having his own space is important to him. If that never happens and he has to share, then he would have to share. He will need someone available 24/7. So we will see. G Mrozak <mrsovaltine@...> wrote: Well put, Ellen. I'd like to emphasize your remark " should have choices in where, with whom, and how they live. " I'm in favor of having housing choices, and yet I see that everyone has some housing choices within their budget, and sometimes within other limitations (distance to work or relatives). I'm not sure that everyone who is a parent sees that if a kid grew up in a wealthy town, that it might not be possible to find housing in that town. And that is " normal " . How many of us, once we left home, got our own tiny apartment, rather than the 3-bedroom house our parents had? It's typical for adults to not have the same standard of living as their parents, who had many years to acquire their housing and amenities. Unfortunately, for a lot of young people (disabled or not), that means that it is very difficult to find anything within their county that is affordable. For adults with DD, this causes huge problems, because so many programs are based on geography, especially based within a county. We'd like our kids to move into lovely places so they don't have to move again, but I think that's making assumptions. It assumes that our kids won't want to move to someplace else or something different. There's a lot of emotions behind our dreams, and the biggest one is " I want to make sure everything will work out after I'm no longer here. " I understand that emotion, and I feel it too, but I don't think that guaranteeing that our kids' lives will be trouble-free is a realistic expectation. I absolutely agree with you that the system is broken, and if that is the only thing that we communicate to our state legislators in the coming year, we'll have achieved much. My guess is that in 5-10 years the huge mess IL is in regarding services for adults with DD will be so bad that it will be on the radar of the general public throughout the state. -Gail From: Ellen Bronfeld <egskbsbcglobal (DOT) net> Subject: Re: about group homes IPADDUnite@gro ups.com Date: Sunday, August 17, 2008, 2:33 PM Since we are not quite there yet, I too would love to hear more about group homes. Nora, I agree completely about shared rooms, but then don't get me started about 7-8 people living in one house, to begin with!!! There had been some legislation on the table about group homes being limited in size (no more than 4 people) with everyone having their own bedrooms, but it didn't get passed. The problem in legislating this is that then every agency will go out and purchase homes for 4 people, when indeed, some individuals (especially those with autism) do much better with only 1 or two roommates and some may really need to be alone with a support person...so, sometimes you have to be careful what you wish for... That said, shared bedrooms, 3 or 4 people to a bathroom...these are not acceptable living conditions, in my opinion. Funding being what it is, I get the fact that there is no money to do better...for families who can afford it, shared cost vis a vis, families purchasing a house or condo and providing funds for much of the upkeep and maintenance may be a good idea...it will give you some leverage to get what you want in terms of number of individuals in the house, quality of staff (maybe) etc...for those who cannot afford it, these are VERY challenging and disturbing times in which to try to create positive, quality living arrangements for our beloved children. The one thing that people with limited resources might be able to do, is to volunteer, be on boards and committees of local agencies that do the best job of providing housing supports and services in your area...Kind of like donation " in kind " ...though everyone should be treated equally in the system, the fact is, especially in times of very limited resources, those who give more, get more... Ellen Ellen Garber Bronfeld egskbsbcglobal (DOT) net about group homes I think I asked this question before but am going to post on a popular blog about housing issues and need more info. I am looking for info on group homes in IL. Two of my three brothers live in group homes. I like one way better than the other but I have some issues with both of them. First, I don't think grown men should have to share a room and second I don't think group homes should close on the holidays. I understand alot of this is due to funding.. My older brother lives on his own in section 8 housing. My other brothers are not quite able to live on their own. I am looking to hear about people's experiences with group homes in general and specifically about group homes in IL. Thanks Nora ************ **Looking for a car that's sporty, fun and fits in your budget? Read reviews on AOL Autos. (http://autos. aol.com/cars- Volkswagen- Jetta-2009/ expert-review? ncid=aolaut00030 000000007 ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 19, 2008 Report Share Posted August 19, 2008 My goal is too get it out there sooner than that, thus the blogging in disability issues on general non disabilty related sites. I figure it can't hurt. Nora In a message dated 8/19/2008 10:15:18 AM Central Daylight Time, mrsovaltine@... writes: My guess is that in 5-10 years the huge mess IL is in regarding services for adults with DD will be so bad that it will be on the radar of the general public throughout the state. **************It's only a deal if it's where you want to go. Find your travel deal here. (http://information.travel.aol.com/deals?ncid=aoltrv00050000000047) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 19, 2008 Report Share Posted August 19, 2008 Gail: I LOVE this statement, " I don't think that guaranteeing that our kids' lives will be trouble-free is a realistic expectation. " I so agree with this and with your comments about young adults not being able to afford the same standard of living as their parents...We certainly didn't all go off and buy houses in our early 20's...at least I didn't! I have no expectation that Noah will live in the same place forever, so if we start with the premise that he will have a " first place " after living at home and then we proceed to the next premise, that his budget his different than mine, it would make perfectly good sense that where Noah lives will be in keeping with a first time bachelor " pad " within his means... I absolutely do not expect that Noah's life will be trouble free, nor do I want to prevent him from experiencing real life, which includes some bumps along the way and possible failure, here and there...I only hope to keep him safe from neglect and abuse... That said, because of lack of funding for housing, what many young adults can afford at the poverty level (based on SSI) would likely be unsafe, unsavory and unacceptable. Each one of us has to be pushing for affordable housing in and around our communities. I don't think any of us want our children 20-30 miles away from the family home and community. Unfortunately, I was not able to log on to a conference call on the New Housing Trust Fund this afternoon because it was already at capacity, but I will be looking for other opportunities to learn about what our federal government is doing to promote affordable housing in our communities. If I learn anything, I will be happy to share that information with the group. Ellen Ellen Garber Bronfeld egskb@... about group homes I think I asked this question before but am going to post on a popular blog about housing issues and need more info. I am looking for info on group homes in IL. Two of my three brothers live in group homes. I like one way better than the other but I have some issues with both of them. First, I don't think grown men should have to share a room and second I don't think group homes should close on the holidays. I understand alot of this is due to funding.. My older brother lives on his own in section 8 housing. My other brothers are not quite able to live on their own. I am looking to hear about people's experiences with group homes in general and specifically about group homes in IL. Thanks Nora ************ **Looking for a car that's sporty, fun and fits in your budget? Read reviews on AOL Autos. (http://autos. aol.com/cars- Volkswagen- Jetta-2009/ expert-review? ncid=aolaut00030 000000007 ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 19, 2008 Report Share Posted August 19, 2008 On the matter of the system is broken. How vocal are we with this concern. It is very common for me to discuss this matter to whom ever will listen. The stranger who asks if my daughter will be moving into a group home, co-workers, etc. Basic statements are all that is needed: Do you realize that the State of Illinois is 51st in the nation for supporting people with development disabilities? Most believe their tax money is taking care of things. I explain where the money goes and there thousands of people on waiting lists all over the state. It can become an interesting conversation. I believe that the more we talk to people outside of our world there will be more people aware of the situation. Also, they too vote. > > From: Ellen Bronfeld <egskbsbcglobal (DOT) net> > > Subject: Re: about group homes > > IPADDUnite@gro ups.com > > Date: Sunday, August 17, 2008, 2:33 PM > > > > Since we are not quite there yet, I too would love to hear more about group homes. > > > > Nora, I agree completely about shared rooms, but then don't get me started about 7-8 people living in one house, to begin with!!! > > > > There had been some legislation on the table about group homes being limited in size (no more than 4 people) with everyone having their own bedrooms, but it didn't get passed. > > > > The problem in legislating this is that then every agency will go out and purchase homes for 4 people, when indeed, some individuals (especially those with autism) do much better with only 1 or two roommates and some may really need to be alone with a support person...so, sometimes you have to be careful what you wish for... > > > > That said, shared bedrooms, 3 or 4 people to a bathroom...these are not acceptable living conditions, in my opinion. > > > > Funding being what it is, I get the fact that there is no money to do better...for families who can afford it, shared cost vis a vis, families purchasing a house or condo and providing funds for much of the upkeep and maintenance may be a good idea...it will give you some leverage to get what you want in terms of number of individuals in the house, quality of staff (maybe) etc...for those who cannot afford it, these are VERY challenging and disturbing times in which to try to create positive, quality living arrangements for our beloved children. The one thing that people with limited resources might be able to do, is to volunteer, be on boards and committees of local agencies that do the best job of providing housing supports and services in your area...Kind of like donation " in kind " ...though everyone should be treated equally in the system, the fact is, especially in times of very limited resources, those who give more, get more... > > > > Ellen > > > > Ellen Garber Bronfeld > > > > egskbsbcglobal (DOT) net > > > > about group homes > > > > I think I asked this question before but am going to post on a popular blog > > > > about housing issues and need more info. I am looking for info on group homes > > > > in IL. Two of my three brothers live in group homes. I like one way better > > > > than the other but I have some issues with both of them. First, I don't think > > > > grown men should have to share a room and second I don't think group homes > > > > should close on the holidays. I understand alot of this is due to funding.. My > > > > older brother lives on his own in section 8 housing. My other brothers are not > > > > quite able to live on their own. I am looking to hear about people's > > > > experiences with group homes in general and specifically about group homes in IL. > > > > Thanks Nora > > > > ************ **Looking for a car that's sporty, fun and fits in your budget? > > > > Read reviews on AOL Autos. > > > > (http://autos. aol.com/cars- Volkswagen- Jetta-2009/ expert-review? ncid=aolaut00030 000000007 ) > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 20, 2008 Report Share Posted August 20, 2008 I also agree with most of what is being said. I just am really TERRIFIED of my child being abused in any way or neglected. I have had so many nightmares about this, some very visual and vivid, to where I wake up suddenly in a sweat, and in tears. I had been touring children's residential/ schools last year, only because I thought if anything happened suddenly, or I became sick etc (I know, why am I thinking about this at 42 y.o.- but see I am a working nurse, and the realities are all around me everyday), I would at least have an idea of what was out there. That's when the nightmares started, and I have seen enough I think, and hopefully won't ever have to use any of them (childrens placements ONLY, is what I am speaking about- not adult living). Diane S. > > From: Ellen Bronfeld <egskbsbcglobal (DOT) net> > > Subject: Re: about group homes > > IPADDUnite@gro ups.com > > Date: Sunday, August 17, 2008, 2:33 PM > > Since we are not quite there yet, I too would love to hear more about group homes. > > Nora, I agree completely about shared rooms, but then don't get me started about 7-8 people living in one house, to begin with!!! > > There had been some legislation on the table about group homes being limited in size (no more than 4 people) with everyone having their own bedrooms, but it didn't get passed. > > The problem in legislating this is that then every agency will go out and purchase homes for 4 people, when indeed, some individuals (especially those with autism) do much better with only 1 or two roommates and some may really need to be alone with a support person...so, sometimes you have to be careful what you wish for... > > That said, shared bedrooms, 3 or 4 people to a bathroom...these are not acceptable living conditions, in my opinion. > > Funding being what it is, I get the fact that there is no money to do better...for families who can afford it, shared cost vis a vis, families purchasing a house or condo and providing funds for much of the upkeep and maintenance may be a good idea...it will give you some leverage to get what you want in terms of number of individuals in the house, quality of staff (maybe) etc...for those who cannot afford it, these are VERY challenging and disturbing times in which to try to create positive, quality living arrangements for our beloved children. The one thing that people with limited resources might be able to do, is to volunteer, be on boards and committees of local agencies that do the best job of providing housing supports and services in your area...Kind of like donation " in kind " ...though everyone should be treated equally in the system, the fact is, especially in times of very limited resources, those who give more, get more... > > Ellen > > Ellen Garber Bronfeld > > egskbsbcglobal (DOT) net > > about group homes > > I think I asked this question before but am going to post on a popular blog > > about housing issues and need more info. I am looking for info on group homes > > in IL. Two of my three brothers live in group homes. I like one way better > > than the other but I have some issues with both of them. First, I don't think > > grown men should have to share a room and second I don't think group homes > > should close on the holidays. I understand alot of this is due to funding.. My > > older brother lives on his own in section 8 housing. My other brothers are not > > quite able to live on their own. I am looking to hear about people's > > experiences with group homes in general and specifically about group homes in IL. > > Thanks Nora > > ************ **Looking for a car that's sporty, fun and fits in your budget? > > Read reviews on AOL Autos. > > (http://autos. aol.com/cars- Volkswagen- Jetta-2009/ expert- review? ncid=aolaut00030 000000007 ) > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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