Forget Balance-Integrate! Creating Harmony In Life And Work

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Article Title:

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Forget Balance-Integrate! Creating Harmony In Life And Work

Article Description:

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Many who come to me for help feel their lives (or some parts of

them) are difficult, cluttered, and discordant. Worse, they feel

guilty because they can't " balance " all the parts of their

lives.

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651 Words; formatted to 65 Characters per Line

Distribution Date and Time: 2008-01-03 11:12:00

Written By: Bruce Elkin

Copyright: 2006-2008

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Forget Balance-Integrate! Creating Harmony In Life And Work

Copyright © 2006-2008 Bruce Elkin

Personal Life Coaching Services

http://www.bruceelkin.com/

" Out of clutter, find Simplicity.

From discord, find Harmony.

In the middle of difficulty lies Opportunity. "

-- Albert Einstein

Many who come to me for help feel their lives (or some parts of

them) are difficult, cluttered, and discordant. Worse, they feel

guilty because they can't " balance " all the parts of their

lives.

Don't feel bad. You can balance a clock, car wheels, and

sometimes a seesaw, but it's hard to balance a life. And if you

could, would you really want to?

A second definition of " balance " is " to cancel out. "

In nature, balance often means death. Experts tell us that

living systems exist " far from equilibrium. " In frigid Artic

air, for example, your body maintains a temperature far from

balance.

So why do people seek balance?

Because they have competing desires.

Career or Family? Simplicity or Success? Being or Becoming?

Trying to achieve both can lead to much back and forthing between

desires. So people try for balance.

But most such attempts lead to seesaw behavior. Balance is

precarious. A slight pressure on one side of a seesaw tips it

into imbalance. And seesaws balance just 2 things!

So, what's the alternative? All work and no family? Simplicity

but no success? No. The alternative is integration.

Integrate means, " combine (parts) into a whole. "

When you combine parts of your life into an integrated whole,

things become simpler. Discord and difficulty give way to

opportunity. Life becomes coherent. Harmony increases.

Take an Olympic athlete, for example. By organizing her life

around what matters most, she lives a far from balanced life.

Sport predominates. But it doesn't drive out the other parts of

her life.

She still has friends, does yoga, goes to church, maintains a

special relationship, often works at a day job, and may even go

to school. But because she integrates those things so they

support her predominant athletic goal, her life is whole and

harmonious.

You can do the same thing.

Rather than force parts of your life to balance, your life will

be simpler, more successful, and harmonious if you arrange less

important parts to support predominant parts.

Instead of making yourself " jog 30 minutes a day, " and hating

it, envision the fit, healthy, and vital body you would love to

have. Then organize as many parts of your life as you can to

support that vision.

Start walking. As you get fitter, start jogging or cycling,

until you can do 30 minutes a day. Use your increased fitness to

ski, dance, do Pilates, or other physical things with friends.

Bring eating habits in line with your vision of vitality. Become

a non-smoker. Instead of hanging out with drinkers at a bar or

bon-bon eaters in cafÈs, hang out with like-minded friends at the

Y, Curves, or running clubs.

Read about exercise, health, and spirit. Go to events that

inspire you to stretch your capacity. As getting fit gradually

becomes something you love, it engages your whole self. It

enables your head, hands, and heart to come together.

The confidence that comes from physical success enables you to

stretch in other areas of life. Take on challenges, develop new

capacities, and integrate those into a life lived from your

deepest values and highest aspirations.

As your whole life becomes integrated, it becomes simpler, more

successful, harmonious, and joyful. Wordsworth put it

beautifully: " With an eye made quiet by the power/ Of harmony,

and the deep power of joy,/ We see into the life of things. "

To create joy and harmony in your life, focus on what matters

most. Put first things first and organize your time and actions

so they support what truly matters.

If you do this well, your life will flow. You'll feel more

relaxed, even as you get more done. Instead of being a sad

lament, your life will sing like a sweet sounding whole.

So, forget balance. Think integration, and create harmony.

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Bruce Elkin is the author of Simplicity and Success and

2 other books. He is an internationally acclaimed Personal &

Professional Life/Work Renewal Coach with 20 years experience.

Get his free eNewsletter at http://www.bruceelkin.com/free.html

Visit www.BruceElkin.com and

http://createwhatmattersmost.blogspot.com