Stop Stressing - Resist the Urge to Time Travel

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Article Title:

Stop Stressing - Resist the Urge to Time Travel

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For creatures that supposedly only exist in the present, we

sure do a lot of time traveling. We worry about tomorrow, we

fret over yesterday, and all the while our current status

gets neglected. If we're going to make the best of our

efforts to relieve stress and get to where we want to be, we

need to make a habit of making the most out of the present,

instead of letting time-traveling worries get the best of

us.

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869 Words; formatted to 65 Characters per Line

Distribution Date and Time: 2010-08-10 10:15:00

Written By: Larry Tobin

Copyright: 2010

Contact Email: mailto:larry.tobin@...

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Stop Stressing - Resist the Urge to Time Travel

Copyright © 2010 Larry Tobin

Habit Changer

http://www.HabitChanger.com/

For creatures that supposedly only exist in the present, we sure

do a lot of time traveling. We worry about tomorrow, we fret over

yesterday, and all the while our current status gets neglected.

Some of our most distracting worries aren't even the current

ones. Frequently we'll drag ourselves down by worrying about

tomorrow and whether we're really ready for it, or we'll fail

to get things done today because we're still beating ourselves

up for the gaffe we made yesterday, or for not doing something we

planned on doing. If we're going to make the best of our efforts

to relieve stress and get to where we want to be, we need to make

a habit of making the most out of the present, instead of letting

time-traveling worries get the best of us.

Step #1 - You're OK

One mistake we often fall into is trying to stop thinking about

something without substituting anything in its place. This isn't

really possible, because the act of trying to stop thinking means

you are thinking. For example, try to go 10 minutes without

thinking about a polar bear on a beach. It's hard, isn't it?

Instead, substitute a positive thought for the negative ones.

When you feel yourself worrying about tomorrow or fretting about

something that happened, interrupt the process. Take a deep,

steadying breath, and say aloud " I am OK now. " What happened

has happened, you can't change it. What's going to happen

isn't here yet, and there's probably time to plan for it.

Instead, focus yourself on what's good in the here and now, and

remind yourself of it.

Step #2 - Physical Reminders

Habits grow stronger when they have a physical component to go

along with the action themselves. The reason many religious

rituals are so ingrained into our culture is the physical parts

that reinforce the idea and help build the habit. Take advantage

of this by carrying around an " I'm OK " card.

On one side of the card, write " I'm OK " along with three

reasons. " I'm OK because... there's food in the house, " or

" I'm OK because... I live in a beautiful neighborhood to walk

in. " Your reasons can be your own, but make sure they appeal to

you and your sense of well-being.

On the other side of the card, write down three things you've

accomplished recently. Big or small — doesn't matter, just put

down something you've managed to do. Once you've verified your

reasons for being OK, flip over and remind yourself of your

progress and that it's helped bring you to the point of being

OK. Do this every time you start to worry about the past, present

or future, and build a steady habit of controlling your thoughts.

Step #3 - Take " Now " Actions

As we've said, activities can help bring your thoughts to the

present instead of stuck in time travel mode. Play a game with

your family, or play with a pet. These activities will force you

to the present, and keep your mind focused on something specific.

Alternatively, stop and read a book for a few minutes. It

doesn't have to be a long time, just enough time to start

following the plot of the story instead of worrying about

problems that are either gone or not yet here. Interestingly, our

brains can process things on multiple levels. When we sleep or

relax, our brains aren't completely " off. " They're often

working on our problems behind the scenes without bothering our

conscious mind. So let your brain do the work for you while you

enjoy yourself and live in the moment.

Step #4 - Be Impulsive

Our thoughts get into patterns, just like our behaviors do.

Sometimes even a verbal interruption and a look at our card

isn't going to be a drastic enough change. This is OK, because

that isn't their purpose. Those steps and habit-building

behaviors are intended to work gradually over an extended period

of time. They mold our behavior steadily. However, sometimes you

need more of a shock to get things worked on.

Take a day off of work if you have it, and go somewhere exciting.

Ride a roller coaster at an amusement park, or go see a really

great movie you've been considering for a bit. Do something

outside your normal routine and force your mind to engage with

it. This can help you get your mind in the right context to make

your smaller, more gradual steps more effective the next day.

Step #5 - Talk it Up

Sometimes, we need a little help. Building a habit can be easier

when we have a partner, after all. Make a point of talking to

someone about how good things are, and how things are working out

for you. A conversation focused on the present is a great way to

get your attention centered in the here and now.

As with all habits, talking works best when it's part of a

routine. Make an appointment for the same time of day or time of

week to meet with your talking buddy. Have a nice, no-strings and

no-worries chat over coffee every Friday, and let your mind relax

from its time traveling worries.

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Larry Tobin is the co-creator of

http://www.HabitChanger.com/ offering effective

and empowering solutions for stopping stress.

Try our 42-day program that will help you learn

proactive habits to beat stress and keep

you moving forward in the right direction.

http://www.habitchanger.com/stopstressing