my update

[Guest guest]

So sorry to hear your vertigo is acting up. I am sending good thoughts your way.

When I'm not feeling well, I go sit in the sun and imagine how that warm feeling

is the vitamin d healing my body (ok in summer, I stand by a window cause it

gets hot in Bama). If the sun or a window isn't available, I imagine that same

feeling. Maybe you have a similiar image that can bring the feeling of healing

to you mind. Maybe if you picture that image when you want to eat, it might

help. I admit if I went out in the sun every time I wanted to eat, I be burned

to a crisp, so be careful!

>

> From: bevshahabdolldesign s <bevshahabdolldesign s@...>

> Subject: [insideoutweightlos s] My update

> weightloss @groups. com

> Date: Tuesday, April 13, 2010, 2:16 AM

>

>  

>

> Hi, Fellow IOWL Listeners,

>

> I'm waiting on my laundry to finish, so I had a few minutes to write.

>

> [] I haven't posted anything on this group in quite a while,

>

> but I still listen and follow IOWL on a regular basis. I started

>

> listening in Aug '08, about 3 months into my " weight loss " plan (my

>

> own), and it has been EXTREMELY helpful to me. I'm about to hit my 2

>

> year anniversary of attempting to lose weight, which is very exciting

>

> for me, because I DID IT!

>

> I've lost 69 lbs., and I'm about 5 lbs. away from my goal of 140. (I'm

>

> wearings 10's and 12's, down from a size 22. Woo! Hoo!) I'm not really

>

> worried about the weight goal; it's going to happen eventually. I am

>

> now part of the National Weight Control Registry.

>

> My life has changed quite a bit in the last 2 years. I was obese for a

>

> very long time (I'm 40; started gaining weight at age 20), and I spent a

>

> great deal of that time shying away from life due to the embarrassment

>

> of my weight. Sad, but true. Now, I am still a bit shy (that's just

>

> ME!), however, I gained the confidence to volunteer at a local

>

> non-profit organization about 5 months ago; that led to a temp job,

>

> which then let to full time work. I am so much happier getting out in

>

> the world than sitting at home feeling bad about myself. I really *get*

>

> what means when she talks about weight loss being more than the

>

> weight, that it's about removing the weight barrier and finding your

>

> " soul's gift " . (Not exactly 's words, but my understanding of her

>

> message.) I let my weight be a barrier to my life. If only I had valued

>

> myself enough to not let the weight be an obstacle; that's where self

>

> acceptance comes in, no matter what your size.

>

> So, I just want to say keep listening and then listen some more.

>

> s and her IOWL message is a precious gift that I will be grateful

>

> for the rest of my life.

>

> Beverly

>

>

[Guest guest]

Wow! Beverly! You rock!

[Guest guest]

Wow! Beverly! You rock!

[Guest guest]

That's a perfect image to bring up....Thanks!

 

My daughter has just brought a chocolate bar into the living room and as usual

she cut off a piece and has left the rest lying here. Being that she is a

naturally slender person, she can do that. She can eat one piece because that's

all she really wants. She can have that chocolate bar lying on her nightstand

for a month and at the end of the month have only eaten half of it. I find that

truly amazing.....

 

OK I just shouted to her to come and get it. I can think of nothing else but the

chocolate bar right now and it's 11.40 at night and my vertigo has been bad and

my will power is not at its best and i am craving that

chocolate!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

But I want to be healthy and I DO NOT want to gain weight again and I want to

get into my summer clothes in the closet and I want to be able to wear a bathing

suit this summer without feeling self conscious and I got on the treadmill today

even though I wasn't feeling that good and burned 300 calories and I ate such

good healthy foods all day.......

 

So.... no chocolate. Crisis averted.

End of story..... :-)

 

evelyn

From: lvrocher <lavrocher@...>

Subject: Re: My update

weightloss

Date: Tuesday, April 13, 2010, 9:25 PM

 

So sorry to hear your vertigo is acting up. I am sending good thoughts your way.

When I'm not feeling well, I go sit in the sun and imagine how that warm feeling

is the vitamin d healing my body (ok in summer, I stand by a window cause it

gets hot in Bama). If the sun or a window isn't available, I imagine that same

feeling. Maybe you have a similiar image that can bring the feeling of healing

to you mind. Maybe if you picture that image when you want to eat, it might

help. I admit if I went out in the sun every time I wanted to eat, I be burned

to a crisp, so be careful!

>

> From: bevshahabdolldesign s <bevshahabdolldesig n s@...>

> Subject: [insideoutweightlos s] My update

> weightloss @groups. com

> Date: Tuesday, April 13, 2010, 2:16 AM

>

>  

>

> Hi, Fellow IOWL Listeners,

>

> I'm waiting on my laundry to finish, so I had a few minutes to write.

>

> [] I haven't posted anything on this group in quite a while,

>

> but I still listen and follow IOWL on a regular basis. I started

>

> listening in Aug '08, about 3 months into my " weight loss " plan (my

>

> own), and it has been EXTREMELY helpful to me. I'm about to hit my 2

>

> year anniversary of attempting to lose weight, which is very exciting

>

> for me, because I DID IT!

>

> I've lost 69 lbs., and I'm about 5 lbs. away from my goal of 140. (I'm

>

> wearings 10's and 12's, down from a size 22. Woo! Hoo!) I'm not really

>

> worried about the weight goal; it's going to happen eventually. I am

>

> now part of the National Weight Control Registry.

>

> My life has changed quite a bit in the last 2 years. I was obese for a

>

> very long time (I'm 40; started gaining weight at age 20), and I spent a

>

> great deal of that time shying away from life due to the embarrassment

>

> of my weight. Sad, but true. Now, I am still a bit shy (that's just

>

> ME!), however, I gained the confidence to volunteer at a local

>

> non-profit organization about 5 months ago; that led to a temp job,

>

> which then let to full time work. I am so much happier getting out in

>

> the world than sitting at home feeling bad about myself. I really *get*

>

> what means when she talks about weight loss being more than the

>

> weight, that it's about removing the weight barrier and finding your

>

> " soul's gift " . (Not exactly 's words, but my understanding of her

>

> message.) I let my weight be a barrier to my life. If only I had valued

>

> myself enough to not let the weight be an obstacle; that's where self

>

> acceptance comes in, no matter what your size.

>

> So, I just want to say keep listening and then listen some more.

>

> s and her IOWL message is a precious gift that I will be grateful

>

> for the rest of my life.

>

> Beverly

>

>

[Guest guest]

That's a perfect image to bring up....Thanks!

 

My daughter has just brought a chocolate bar into the living room and as usual

she cut off a piece and has left the rest lying here. Being that she is a

naturally slender person, she can do that. She can eat one piece because that's

all she really wants. She can have that chocolate bar lying on her nightstand

for a month and at the end of the month have only eaten half of it. I find that

truly amazing.....

 

OK I just shouted to her to come and get it. I can think of nothing else but the

chocolate bar right now and it's 11.40 at night and my vertigo has been bad and

my will power is not at its best and i am craving that

chocolate!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

But I want to be healthy and I DO NOT want to gain weight again and I want to

get into my summer clothes in the closet and I want to be able to wear a bathing

suit this summer without feeling self conscious and I got on the treadmill today

even though I wasn't feeling that good and burned 300 calories and I ate such

good healthy foods all day.......

 

So.... no chocolate. Crisis averted.

End of story..... :-)

 

evelyn

From: lvrocher <lavrocher@...>

Subject: Re: My update

weightloss

Date: Tuesday, April 13, 2010, 9:25 PM

 

So sorry to hear your vertigo is acting up. I am sending good thoughts your way.

When I'm not feeling well, I go sit in the sun and imagine how that warm feeling

is the vitamin d healing my body (ok in summer, I stand by a window cause it

gets hot in Bama). If the sun or a window isn't available, I imagine that same

feeling. Maybe you have a similiar image that can bring the feeling of healing

to you mind. Maybe if you picture that image when you want to eat, it might

help. I admit if I went out in the sun every time I wanted to eat, I be burned

to a crisp, so be careful!

>

> From: bevshahabdolldesign s <bevshahabdolldesig n s@...>

> Subject: [insideoutweightlos s] My update

> weightloss @groups. com

> Date: Tuesday, April 13, 2010, 2:16 AM

>

>  

>

> Hi, Fellow IOWL Listeners,

>

> I'm waiting on my laundry to finish, so I had a few minutes to write.

>

> [] I haven't posted anything on this group in quite a while,

>

> but I still listen and follow IOWL on a regular basis. I started

>

> listening in Aug '08, about 3 months into my " weight loss " plan (my

>

> own), and it has been EXTREMELY helpful to me. I'm about to hit my 2

>

> year anniversary of attempting to lose weight, which is very exciting

>

> for me, because I DID IT!

>

> I've lost 69 lbs., and I'm about 5 lbs. away from my goal of 140. (I'm

>

> wearings 10's and 12's, down from a size 22. Woo! Hoo!) I'm not really

>

> worried about the weight goal; it's going to happen eventually. I am

>

> now part of the National Weight Control Registry.

>

> My life has changed quite a bit in the last 2 years. I was obese for a

>

> very long time (I'm 40; started gaining weight at age 20), and I spent a

>

> great deal of that time shying away from life due to the embarrassment

>

> of my weight. Sad, but true. Now, I am still a bit shy (that's just

>

> ME!), however, I gained the confidence to volunteer at a local

>

> non-profit organization about 5 months ago; that led to a temp job,

>

> which then let to full time work. I am so much happier getting out in

>

> the world than sitting at home feeling bad about myself. I really *get*

>

> what means when she talks about weight loss being more than the

>

> weight, that it's about removing the weight barrier and finding your

>

> " soul's gift " . (Not exactly 's words, but my understanding of her

>

> message.) I let my weight be a barrier to my life. If only I had valued

>

> myself enough to not let the weight be an obstacle; that's where self

>

> acceptance comes in, no matter what your size.

>

> So, I just want to say keep listening and then listen some more.

>

> s and her IOWL message is a precious gift that I will be grateful

>

> for the rest of my life.

>

> Beverly

>

>

[Guest guest]

WOW what willpower! I have been working on my taxes, yes I know what the date

is, but I just haven't had time. I am a big chocolate fan. I eat something choc

everyday. I have to portion it out and keep it out of sight, but it has really

been calling me today. You are inspiring through your vertigo!

v

[insideoutweightlos s] My update

> weightloss @groups. com

> Date: Tuesday, April 13, 2010, 2:16 AM

>

> Â

>

> Hi, Fellow IOWL Listeners,

>

> I'm waiting on my laundry to finish, so I had a few minutes to write.

>

> [] I haven't posted anything on this group in quite a while,

>

> but I still listen and follow IOWL on a regular basis. I started

>

> listening in Aug '08, about 3 months into my " weight loss " plan (my

>

> own), and it has been EXTREMELY helpful to me. I'm about to hit my 2

>

> year anniversary of attempting to lose weight, which is very exciting

>

> for me, because I DID IT!

>

> I've lost 69 lbs., and I'm about 5 lbs. away from my goal of 140. (I'm

>

> wearings 10's and 12's, down from a size 22. Woo! Hoo!) I'm not really

>

> worried about the weight goal; it's going to happen eventually. I am

>

> now part of the National Weight Control Registry.

>

> My life has changed quite a bit in the last 2 years. I was obese for a

>

> very long time (I'm 40; started gaining weight at age 20), and I spent a

>

> great deal of that time shying away from life due to the embarrassment

>

> of my weight. Sad, but true. Now, I am still a bit shy (that's just

>

> ME!), however, I gained the confidence to volunteer at a local

>

> non-profit organization about 5 months ago; that led to a temp job,

>

> which then let to full time work. I am so much happier getting out in

>

> the world than sitting at home feeling bad about myself. I really *get*

>

> what means when she talks about weight loss being more than the

>

> weight, that it's about removing the weight barrier and finding your

>

> " soul's gift " . (Not exactly 's words, but my understanding of her

>

> message.) I let my weight be a barrier to my life. If only I had valued

>

> myself enough to not let the weight be an obstacle; that's where self

>

> acceptance comes in, no matter what your size.

>

> So, I just want to say keep listening and then listen some more.

>

> s and her IOWL message is a precious gift that I will be grateful

>

> for the rest of my life.

>

> Beverly

>

>

[Guest guest]

WOW what willpower! I have been working on my taxes, yes I know what the date

is, but I just haven't had time. I am a big chocolate fan. I eat something choc

everyday. I have to portion it out and keep it out of sight, but it has really

been calling me today. You are inspiring through your vertigo!

v

[insideoutweightlos s] My update

> weightloss @groups. com

> Date: Tuesday, April 13, 2010, 2:16 AM

>

> Â

>

> Hi, Fellow IOWL Listeners,

>

> I'm waiting on my laundry to finish, so I had a few minutes to write.

>

> [] I haven't posted anything on this group in quite a while,

>

> but I still listen and follow IOWL on a regular basis. I started

>

> listening in Aug '08, about 3 months into my " weight loss " plan (my

>

> own), and it has been EXTREMELY helpful to me. I'm about to hit my 2

>

> year anniversary of attempting to lose weight, which is very exciting

>

> for me, because I DID IT!

>

> I've lost 69 lbs., and I'm about 5 lbs. away from my goal of 140. (I'm

>

> wearings 10's and 12's, down from a size 22. Woo! Hoo!) I'm not really

>

> worried about the weight goal; it's going to happen eventually. I am

>

> now part of the National Weight Control Registry.

>

> My life has changed quite a bit in the last 2 years. I was obese for a

>

> very long time (I'm 40; started gaining weight at age 20), and I spent a

>

> great deal of that time shying away from life due to the embarrassment

>

> of my weight. Sad, but true. Now, I am still a bit shy (that's just

>

> ME!), however, I gained the confidence to volunteer at a local

>

> non-profit organization about 5 months ago; that led to a temp job,

>

> which then let to full time work. I am so much happier getting out in

>

> the world than sitting at home feeling bad about myself. I really *get*

>

> what means when she talks about weight loss being more than the

>

> weight, that it's about removing the weight barrier and finding your

>

> " soul's gift " . (Not exactly 's words, but my understanding of her

>

> message.) I let my weight be a barrier to my life. If only I had valued

>

> myself enough to not let the weight be an obstacle; that's where self

>

> acceptance comes in, no matter what your size.

>

> So, I just want to say keep listening and then listen some more.

>

> s and her IOWL message is a precious gift that I will be grateful

>

> for the rest of my life.

>

> Beverly

>

>

[Guest guest]

WOW what willpower! I have been working on my taxes, yes I know what the date

is, but I just haven't had time. I am a big chocolate fan. I eat something choc

everyday. I have to portion it out and keep it out of sight, but it has really

been calling me today. You are inspiring through your vertigo!

v

[insideoutweightlos s] My update

> weightloss @groups. com

> Date: Tuesday, April 13, 2010, 2:16 AM

>

> Â

>

> Hi, Fellow IOWL Listeners,

>

> I'm waiting on my laundry to finish, so I had a few minutes to write.

>

> [] I haven't posted anything on this group in quite a while,

>

> but I still listen and follow IOWL on a regular basis. I started

>

> listening in Aug '08, about 3 months into my " weight loss " plan (my

>

> own), and it has been EXTREMELY helpful to me. I'm about to hit my 2

>

> year anniversary of attempting to lose weight, which is very exciting

>

> for me, because I DID IT!

>

> I've lost 69 lbs., and I'm about 5 lbs. away from my goal of 140. (I'm

>

> wearings 10's and 12's, down from a size 22. Woo! Hoo!) I'm not really

>

> worried about the weight goal; it's going to happen eventually. I am

>

> now part of the National Weight Control Registry.

>

> My life has changed quite a bit in the last 2 years. I was obese for a

>

> very long time (I'm 40; started gaining weight at age 20), and I spent a

>

> great deal of that time shying away from life due to the embarrassment

>

> of my weight. Sad, but true. Now, I am still a bit shy (that's just

>

> ME!), however, I gained the confidence to volunteer at a local

>

> non-profit organization about 5 months ago; that led to a temp job,

>

> which then let to full time work. I am so much happier getting out in

>

> the world than sitting at home feeling bad about myself. I really *get*

>

> what means when she talks about weight loss being more than the

>

> weight, that it's about removing the weight barrier and finding your

>

> " soul's gift " . (Not exactly 's words, but my understanding of her

>

> message.) I let my weight be a barrier to my life. If only I had valued

>

> myself enough to not let the weight be an obstacle; that's where self

>

> acceptance comes in, no matter what your size.

>

> So, I just want to say keep listening and then listen some more.

>

> s and her IOWL message is a precious gift that I will be grateful

>

> for the rest of my life.

>

> Beverly

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi ....

I cannot portion out chocolate. I wonder if I would ever be able to eat just a

bit....

 

A friend picked me up today and we went over to her house and she had made

chocolate mousse. She totally understood that I was trying to eat healthy and

put it away but the chocolate last night and the mousse this morning together

with me feeling a bit sorry for myself.... well....I gave in and ate two

bowls......... Totally delicious!

 

Anyway, I'm back on track tonight.

Will definitely work on this tonight. What could I have done differently? I'll

do a redo.

From: lvrocher <lavrocheraol (DOT) com>

Subject: [insideoutweightlos s] Re: My update

weightloss @groups. com

Date: Tuesday, April 13, 2010, 9:25 PM

So sorry to hear your vertigo is acting up. I am sending good thoughts your way.

When I'm not feeling well, I go sit in the sun and imagine how that warm feeling

is the vitamin d healing my body (ok in summer, I stand by a window cause it

gets hot in Bama). If the sun or a window isn't available, I imagine that same

feeling. Maybe you have a similiar image that can bring the feeling of healing

to you mind. Maybe if you picture that image when you want to eat, it might

help. I admit if I went out in the sun every time I wanted to eat, I be burned

to a crisp, so be careful!

>

> From: bevshahabdolldesign s <bevshahabdolldesig n s@...>

> Subject: [insideoutweightlos s] My update

> weightloss @groups. com

> Date: Tuesday, April 13, 2010, 2:16 AM

>

> Â

>

> Hi, Fellow IOWL Listeners,

>

> I'm waiting on my laundry to finish, so I had a few minutes to write.

>

> [] I haven't posted anything on this group in quite a while,

>

> but I still listen and follow IOWL on a regular basis. I started

>

> listening in Aug '08, about 3 months into my " weight loss " plan (my

>

> own), and it has been EXTREMELY helpful to me. I'm about to hit my 2

>

> year anniversary of attempting to lose weight, which is very exciting

>

> for me, because I DID IT!

>

> I've lost 69 lbs., and I'm about 5 lbs. away from my goal of 140. (I'm

>

> wearings 10's and 12's, down from a size 22. Woo! Hoo!) I'm not really

>

> worried about the weight goal; it's going to happen eventually. I am

>

> now part of the National Weight Control Registry.

>

> My life has changed quite a bit in the last 2 years. I was obese for a

>

> very long time (I'm 40; started gaining weight at age 20), and I spent a

>

> great deal of that time shying away from life due to the embarrassment

>

> of my weight. Sad, but true. Now, I am still a bit shy (that's just

>

> ME!), however, I gained the confidence to volunteer at a local

>

> non-profit organization about 5 months ago; that led to a temp job,

>

> which then let to full time work. I am so much happier getting out in

>

> the world than sitting at home feeling bad about myself. I really *get*

>

> what means when she talks about weight loss being more than the

>

> weight, that it's about removing the weight barrier and finding your

>

> " soul's gift " . (Not exactly 's words, but my understanding of her

>

> message.) I let my weight be a barrier to my life. If only I had valued

>

> myself enough to not let the weight be an obstacle; that's where self

>

> acceptance comes in, no matter what your size.

>

> So, I just want to say keep listening and then listen some more.

>

> s and her IOWL message is a precious gift that I will be grateful

>

> for the rest of my life.

>

> Beverly

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Doug,

Despite your bumps along the way I am very happy you are out on your

own---congrats! ~a

________________________________

From: <doug696@...>

Sent: Sat, April 16, 2011 8:48:20 PM

Subject: My Update

Some of you had asked me for an update awhile back on my living conditions, so

here goes. I did move into a senior high rise last August to get out of a

verbally abusive home ( my brother in law). I receive 90 hours of homecare a

month, applied for 122 hours as of this week. One hr in the morning to get bath

and up in the chair plus breakfast if there's time. One hour at 1 o'clock to

hopefully have bowel movement, cleaning/set me up for dinner. Then an hour for

bed. I shouldn't be alone at night, but it's well worth the risk to get out of

my sisters house. Yes it was that bad. I was basically locked in my apt these

past 8 months because I had to fight for a remote door. The management finally

relented in March if I paid half ($1300), and they keep it if I move. I am also

unable to let anyone in the building from bed in the morning. So if the same

lady who puts me in bed comes in the morning too, she just takes the key home.

If its someone else the nightime lady puts the keys inside the bumper of my van.

Again not the safest scenario, but its usually only 2-3 times a week.I'm doing

fairly well, enjoy my solitude and peace, as well as decorating little studio.

Never got to do that before as I've always lived others, it's kinda fun lol.

Been very lucky with my state hired pca's too.....knock on wood. So thats it, on

my own for the first time in 53 yrs! Doug

[Guest guest]

Well done on being brave enough to take risks to get out of an abusive

family situation!!

How do you manage to limit bathroom visits to just those 3 hours of

assistance? Also I keep looking for tips on how to get positioned in bed so

I won't need turning, could you share how you manage that?

Hope you get those extra hours soon!

Sent from my iPhone

On 17 Apr 2011, at 19:29, " a B. " <kristina45231@...> wrote:

Hi Doug,

Despite your bumps along the way I am very happy you are out on your

own---congrats! ~a

________________________________

From: <doug696@...>

Sent: Sat, April 16, 2011 8:48:20 PM

Subject: My Update

Some of you had asked me for an update awhile back on my living conditions,

so

here goes. I did move into a senior high rise last August to get out of a

verbally abusive home ( my brother in law). I receive 90 hours of homecare a

month, applied for 122 hours as of this week. One hr in the morning to get

bath

and up in the chair plus breakfast if there's time. One hour at 1 o'clock to

hopefully have bowel movement, cleaning/set me up for dinner. Then an hour

for

bed. I shouldn't be alone at night, but it's well worth the risk to get out

of

my sisters house. Yes it was that bad. I was basically locked in my apt

these

past 8 months because I had to fight for a remote door. The management

finally

relented in March if I paid half ($1300), and they keep it if I move. I am

also

unable to let anyone in the building from bed in the morning. So if the same

lady who puts me in bed comes in the morning too, she just takes the key

home.

If its someone else the nightime lady puts the keys inside the bumper of my

van.

Again not the safest scenario, but its usually only 2-3 times a week.I'm

doing

fairly well, enjoy my solitude and peace, as well as decorating little

studio.

Never got to do that before as I've always lived others, it's kinda fun lol.

Been very lucky with my state hired pca's too.....knock on wood. So thats

it, on

my own for the first time in 53 yrs! Doug

[Guest guest]

Sounds much better!  I hope you get the extra hours!

 

Lori

________________________________

From: a B. <kristina45231@...>

Sent: Sunday, April 17, 2011 1:29 PM

Subject: Re: My Update

 

Hi Doug,

Despite your bumps along the way I am very happy you are out on your

own---congrats! ~a

________________________________

From: <doug696@...>

Sent: Sat, April 16, 2011 8:48:20 PM

Subject: My Update

Some of you had asked me for an update awhile back on my living conditions, so

here goes. I did move into a senior high rise last August to get out of a

verbally abusive home ( my brother in law). I receive 90 hours of homecare a

month, applied for 122 hours as of this week. One hr in the morning to get bath

and up in the chair plus breakfast if there's time. One hour at 1 o'clock to

hopefully have bowel movement, cleaning/set me up for dinner. Then an hour for

bed. I shouldn't be alone at night, but it's well worth the risk to get out of

my sisters house. Yes it was that bad. I was basically locked in my apt these

past 8 months because I had to fight for a remote door. The management finally

relented in March if I paid half ($1300), and they keep it if I move. I am also

unable to let anyone in the building from bed in the morning. So if the same

lady who puts me in bed comes in the morning too, she just takes the key home.

If its someone else the nightime lady puts the keys inside the bumper of my van.

Again not the safest scenario, but its usually only 2-3 times a week.I'm doing

fairly well, enjoy my solitude and peace, as well as decorating little studio.

Never got to do that before as I've always lived others, it's kinda fun lol.

Been very lucky with my state hired pca's too.....knock on wood. So thats it, on

my own for the first time in 53 yrs! Doug

[Guest guest]

Hi , I only mean't bowel movements for my afternoon shift as I can use a

urinal myself. It would be close to impossible if I couldn't pee on my own, and

it is getting very hard to do. As for my afternoon shift I get on the toilet and

if I go fine, if not well tough luck for me. Afternoon is my " usual " time

though, helps to be regular I suppose. As for night time I lay on my back, put

one pillow under my knees lengthwise, and another under my left knee but

vertically to keep my heel from digging into the mattress, doesn't bother my

right heel for some reason. I have a Select Comfort air mattress, and between

inflating and deflating along with raising and lower the head and foot of my bed

distributes my weight throughout the night. I don't get much sleep, but hey. I

just make damn sure everythings " in place " before the aide leaves. Because

there's no one to call for help. Have a wonderful day, and stay healthy, Doug

[Guest guest]

There is an automatic positioning mattress which works well for some people.

Although I did not use it, I believe it can be programmed to turn a person from

side to side. It might be worth looking into.

T.K. Small

>

>

> Hi , I only mean't bowel movements for my afternoon shift as I can use a

urinal myself. It would be close to impossible if I couldn't pee on my own, and

it is getting very hard to do. As for my afternoon shift I get on the toilet and

if I go fine, if not well tough luck for me. Afternoon is my " usual " time

though, helps to be regular I suppose. As for night time I lay on my back, put

one pillow under my knees lengthwise, and another under my left knee but

vertically to keep my heel from digging into the mattress, doesn't bother my

right heel for some reason. I have a Select Comfort air mattress, and between

inflating and deflating along with raising and lower the head and foot of my bed

distributes my weight throughout the night. I don't get much sleep, but hey. I

just make damn sure everythings " in place " before the aide leaves. Because

there's no one to call for help. Have a wonderful day, and stay healthy, Doug

>

>

[Guest guest]

Oh, this explains more... sorry you are dealing with issues with hummy and the reflex, etc. I don't have the potty issues (TMI) but coffee may help... I have a fellow blog buddy that calls coffee liquid plungr LOL!!! But yeah, ask your doctor about all of that stuff, things should be getting better if you are eating better I would think.

My Update

Well my goal for FEB was get in the 250's comfortably.

Well I am in the 250's but not comfortable. 259.

So since Jan 1 there is 11 lbs gone. I dont feel it. Waiting for myself to notice.

I believe tHat I have been eating better. AND my body is holding on to the fat as a starvation mod. Do to major major acid reflux I cant eat stuff I used to binge on. GREAT motivation but sucks how it makes you feel. Headaches which I dont know if it is part of the acid issue. AND not being able to go to the bathroom. Last night I almost gave in and ran to the drugstore to get something to help. Only 1 time in a week. AND I have been eating fiber foods, activa, no fat foods. This eating well sucks. LOL So I did have a cup of coffee last night and this morning hoping it helps. So if you have any suggestion for something to buy that helps give a shout out.

Hubby and I have been fighting. NO matter what I cook OR what I do he says it is not enough. I made meatloaf with 85 persent lean meat. He said not lean enough... whatever.

kids are on vacation... I got the biggest loser journal which will start on monday. Had 12 inches of snow. Is it monday yet.

Happy Saturday...

PS March goal get in the 240's...

NH

[Guest guest]

You would think . I had a few days where I kept telling myself this eating well is for the birds.

My Update

Well my goal for FEB was get in the 250's comfortably.

Well I am in the 250's but not comfortable. 259.

So since Jan 1 there is 11 lbs gone. I dont feel it. Waiting for myself to notice.

I believe tHat I have been eating better. AND my body is holding on to the fat as a starvation mod. Do to major major acid reflux I cant eat stuff I used to binge on. GREAT motivation but sucks how it makes you feel. Headaches which I dont know if it is part of the acid issue. AND not being able to go to the bathroom. Last night I almost gave in and ran to the drugstore to get something to help. Only 1 time in a week. AND I have been eating fiber foods, activa, no fat foods. This eating well sucks. LOL So I did have a cup of coffee last night and this morning hoping it helps. So if you have any suggestion for something to buy that helps give a shout out.

Hubby and I have been fighting. NO matter what I cook OR what I do he says it is not enough. I made meatloaf with 85 persent lean meat. He said not lean enough... whatever.

kids are on vacation... I got the biggest loser journal which will start on monday. Had 12 inches of snow. Is it monday yet.

Happy Saturday...

PS March goal get in the 240's...

NH

[Guest guest]

Hi :I'm way behind on emails but.... here it goes.I was having the same issue with the bathroom and I finally found a product called Fiber gummies by Fleet. I get the pedia ones...They have 0 calories and taste like gummy bears. Each one has 2 grams of fiber. I eat 6-8 of them every night and it works like a charm. You can get them from Walmart. For me, they are like eating a candy treat every night. You may want to try them...they definitely worked for me. i was only going once every 8-10 days and was bleeding every time. No problems now. Good luck...and hang in there..Spring can't be that far away. I know how you feel, though, because we've got about 2 feet on the ground here in michigan. Theresa MI

Well my goal for FEB was get in the 250's comfortably.

Well I am in the 250's but not comfortable. 259.

So since Jan 1 there is 11 lbs gone. I dont feel it. Waiting for myself to notice.

I believe tHat I have been eating better. AND my body is holding on to the fat as a starvation mod. Do to major major acid reflux I cant eat stuff I used to binge on. GREAT motivation but sucks how it makes you feel. Headaches which I dont know if it is part of the acid issue. AND not being able to go to the bathroom. Last night I almost gave in and ran to the drugstore to get something to help. Only 1 time in a week. AND I have been eating fiber foods, activa, no fat foods. This eating well sucks. LOL So I did have a cup of coffee last night and this morning hoping it helps. So if you have any suggestion for something to buy that helps give a shout out.

Hubby and I have been fighting. NO matter what I cook OR what I do he says it is not enough. I made meatloaf with 85 persent lean meat. He said not lean enough... whatever.

kids are on vacation... I got the biggest loser journal which will start on monday. Had 12 inches of snow. Is it monday yet.

Happy Saturday...

PS March goal get in the 240's...

NH

[Guest guest]

thanks for the tip. i got metamucil over the weekend. hoping that works if not I will definitely try the gummies.

Re: My Update

Hi :

I'm way behind on emails but.... here it goes.

I was having the same issue with the bathroom and I finally found a product called Fiber gummies by Fleet. I get the pedia ones...They have 0 calories and taste like gummy bears. Each one has 2 grams of fiber. I eat 6-8 of them every night and it works like a charm. You can get them from Walmart. For me, they are like eating a candy treat every night. You may want to try them...they definitely worked for me. i was only going once every 8-10 days and was bleeding every time. No problems now. Good luck...and hang in there..Spring can't be that far away. I know how you feel, though, because we've got about 2 feet on the ground here in michigan. Theresa MI

Well my goal for FEB was get in the 250's comfortably.

Well I am in the 250's but not comfortable. 259.

So since Jan 1 there is 11 lbs gone. I dont feel it. Waiting for myself to notice.

I believe tHat I have been eating better. AND my body is holding on to the fat as a starvation mod. Do to major major acid reflux I cant eat stuff I used to binge on. GREAT motivation but sucks how it makes you feel. Headaches which I dont know if it is part of the acid issue. AND not being able to go to the bathroom. Last night I almost gave in and ran to the drugstore to get something to help. Only 1 time in a week. AND I have been eating fiber foods, activa, no fat foods. This eating well sucks. LOL So I did have a cup of coffee last night and this morning hoping it helps. So if you have any suggestion for something to buy that helps give a shout out.

Hubby and I have been fighting. NO matter what I cook OR what I do he says it is not enough. I made meatloaf with 85 persent lean meat. He said not lean enough... whatever.

kids are on vacation... I got the biggest loser journal which will start on monday. Had 12 inches of snow. Is it monday yet.

Happy Saturday...

PS March goal get in the 240's...

NH

[Guest guest]

On 3/5/2012 6:26 AM, Jase4567 wrote:

You would think . I had a few days where I kept

telling myself this eating well is for the birds.

It's so frustrating when you do everything *right* and still see no

results. It's even worse when the rest of the family - especially

husband's - complain and sabotage you at every turn.

That weight calculator site I sent the url for earlier today

(http://bwsimulator.niddk.nih.gov/ ) was a real eye-opener. I played

around with it over a half hour and was so frustrated! First off, it

assumed I was eating nearly twice as many calories as I am to

maintain the weight I'm at now, so already I have to eat less

calories than what it eventually calculates. Then I set it to lose

enough weight to get me into the upper range of the "healthy" BMI

range in one year and it said i had to eat 350 calories a day. OK,

let's see how long it *will* take then.

8 1/2 years @ 1600 calories a day to get to 150 pounds from the 270

I am now. Of course I can increase my exercise 20%, 30%, 50%, 100%,

even 400% more and get there a bit sooner, but I know what happens

if I exercise more than I'm doing now - I injure myself and then

can't do *any* exercise. If I want to get to my 220 eating 1600

calories it'll take about 4 years. If I eat only 1000 calories a

day, then about 3 years to hit 220, but only get an additional 50

calories a day for maintenance. There's no way I can live on that

little amount of food for the rest of my life.

So frustrating and depressing!

Sue in NJ

[Guest guest]

On 3/5/2012 8:55 AM, Theresa wrote:

 

 Hi :

I'm way behind on emails but.... here it goes.

I was having the same issue with the bathroom and I finally

found a product called Fiber gummies by Fleet.

Extra fiber is good in these cases, but why not get it from real

food instead of chemicals? Have some fruit, salads, beans, even

orange juice and oatmeal. And don't forget the water. You'll need to

drink more - a *minimum* of 1/2 ounce for every pound of body

weight. Coffee and tea don't count towards your water consumption

because they're dehydrating.

And if all else fails and you need chemicals, milk of magnesia

always did the trick for me when I was a kid.

, this bathroom distress could also be related to low thyroid,

so just as I mentioned in the previous post on depression, get your

thyroid levels checked soon.

Sue in NJ

[Guest guest]

thanks sue. i have been eating better. more fruit, salads, oatmeal, high fiber bread. NOTHING NOTHING. Trying to figure out why eating better, major acid reflux is doing this to me. YUGH... have physical april 13 and plan on doing blood work ahead of time.

Re: My Update

On 3/5/2012 8:55 AM, Theresa wrote:

Hi :

I'm way behind on emails but.... here it goes.

I was having the same issue with the bathroom and I finally found a product called Fiber gummies by Fleet.

Extra fiber is good in these cases, but why not get it from real food instead of chemicals? Have some fruit, salads, beans, even orange juice and oatmeal. And don't forget the water. You'll need to drink more - a *minimum* of 1/2 ounce for every pound of body weight. Coffee and tea don't count towards your water consumption because they're dehydrating.

And if all else fails and you need chemicals, milk of magnesia always did the trick for me when I was a kid.

, this bathroom distress could also be related to low thyroid, so just as I mentioned in the previous post on depression, get your thyroid levels checked soon.

Sue in NJ

[Guest guest]

Well, I've had a few weeks to process my newest situation, and now it's time to

share with you all

A brief overview of my progression... I was diagnosed in June 1998 and had a

myotomy in an emergency situation in July 1998.  I've continued over the course

of the last 14 years to have severe spasms with periods of horrible dsyphagia.

 I've had at least 1 dilatation per year since, other than the last 2 years

where I was pregnant and then in between GI's/surgeons.  My surgeon retired last

year, leaving me in a situation where I was in a location where I had no surgeon

nearby.  He referred me to a surgeon about 3 hours from my house, but that ended

up not working out (really long story).  After spending last fall getting worse

and worse, we were lucky enough to get a new GI and a new thoracic surgeon at

the hospital an hour from our house.  I was seen urgently by the new GI for a

scope Dec 30 and given that view, sent urgently to the new surgeon for an

appointment the first week in January.  He scoped me 2 days later and then

scheduled a gastric

emptying study (given the amount of food in my esophagus and stomach, even

after clear fluids, ie nothing for me, for 48 hours) and new upper GI.  Those

results came back 3 weeks ago, and after seeing my upper GI, and my husband

seeing it as it happened (he's an xray tech), we basically expected the news

that we received.  

I'm scheduled for an ectomy on March 30 and I'll admit I'm quite nervous.  Major

surgery never really thrills me, and this certainly qualifies as that type of

situation  The state of my esophagus at this point is so beyond repair.  It's

twisting and I have fiberous bits there that don't look good.  Thankfully, there

is no sign of cancer or Barretts, so for that I am very grateful.  It's *well*

over 10cm, and is a mess from top to bottom.  The surgeon just doesn't believe

that I would get any sort of relief from another myotomy at this point and after

seeing everything I've seen (and feeling like I've been feeling) I'm tending to

believe him.

Here's the kicker though, and the part that is making me post.  I've noticed

people in the last while posting about myotomies with no wraps.  I've found out

that my initial myotomy was incomplete, not going far enough into my stomach,

and that I had no wrap.  My surgeon has suggested that might be the cause of my

horrible spasms and part of the trouble with requiring so many dilatations

without any sort of relief over all these years.  Whether or not that is the

case is unknown, I'm sure.  But seeing some of you all mentioning vigorous

achalasia (which I was also told I have/had) and then the comments about myotomy

with no wrap, I wonder if there might be a connection.

At any rate, I'll be in the hospital for 2 weeks or so, then back for that

lovely long recuperation, but despite my nerves, I'm looking forward to the new

road I'll be on.  I bounce between the thoughts of " the devil you know and the

devil you don't " and " I won't have Achalasia anymore! " , but I try to keep the

" won't have A " thoughts foremost in my mind.

Thank you all so much for always posting comforting words, as even if you're

just reading them towards someone else, they lift the spirits of many

kim in canada

[Guest guest]

Hi Kim,

 

While it seems like you'll soon be crossing over to join the elite former

achalasians, I can't help but wonder, with all that you said in your post, if

seeking out another couple of opinions, might result in a doctor saying

something different.  I get it that your choices of doctors are limited, but

once your esophagus is gone there is no turning back. If there is any

possibility that another surgeon feels that you do not need an ectomy, but that

an adjustment to the wrap will give improved " functioning " then that might be

the preferred way to go.

 

The people who have had ectomies and so generously shared their experiences with

us, have generally reported that the surgery and subsequent recovery is no " walk

in the park, " but if they had to choose again knowing what they had been

through, they overwhelmingly say that they made the right choice. 

 

I speak from the experience of having several surgeons tell me I must have an

ectomy, but upon soliciting many opinions chose not to. So far I feel fortunate

to have made the right choice.

 

All of us feel for you and your situation.

 

________________________________

From: Kim <kimmydawn42@...>

" achalasia " <achalasia >

Sent: Tuesday, March 6, 2012 7:36 PM

Subject: my update

 

Well, I've had a few weeks to process my newest situation, and now it's time to

share with you all

A brief overview of my progression... I was diagnosed in June 1998 and had a

myotomy in an emergency situation in July 1998.  I've continued over the course

of the last 14 years to have severe spasms with periods of horrible dsyphagia.

 I've had at least 1 dilatation per year since, other than the last 2 years

where I was pregnant and then in between GI's/surgeons.  My surgeon retired

last year, leaving me in a situation where I was in a location where I had no

surgeon nearby.  He referred me to a surgeon about 3 hours from my house, but

that ended up not working out (really long story).  After spending last fall

getting worse and worse, we were lucky enough to get a new GI and a new thoracic

surgeon at the hospital an hour from our house.  I was seen urgently by the new

GI for a scope Dec 30 and given that view, sent urgently to the new surgeon for

an appointment the first week in January.  He scoped me 2 days later and then

scheduled a gastric

emptying study (given the amount of food in my esophagus and stomach, even after

clear fluids, ie nothing for me, for 48 hours) and new upper GI.  Those results

came back 3 weeks ago, and after seeing my upper GI, and my husband seeing it as

it happened (he's an xray tech), we basically expected the news that we

received.  

I'm scheduled for an ectomy on March 30 and I'll admit I'm quite nervous.

 Major surgery never really thrills me, and this certainly qualifies as that

type of situation  The state of my esophagus at this point is so beyond

repair.  It's twisting and I have fiberous bits there that don't look good.

 Thankfully, there is no sign of cancer or Barretts, so for that I am very

grateful.  It's *well* over 10cm, and is a mess from top to bottom.  The

surgeon just doesn't believe that I would get any sort of relief from another

myotomy at this point and after seeing everything I've seen (and feeling like

I've been feeling) I'm tending to believe him.

Here's the kicker though, and the part that is making me post.  I've noticed

people in the last while posting about myotomies with no wraps.  I've found out

that my initial myotomy was incomplete, not going far enough into my stomach,

and that I had no wrap.  My surgeon has suggested that might be the cause of my

horrible spasms and part of the trouble with requiring so many dilatations

without any sort of relief over all these years.  Whether or not that is the

case is unknown, I'm sure.  But seeing some of you all mentioning vigorous

achalasia (which I was also told I have/had) and then the comments about myotomy

with no wrap, I wonder if there might be a connection.

At any rate, I'll be in the hospital for 2 weeks or so, then back for that

lovely long recuperation, but despite my nerves, I'm looking forward to the new

road I'll be on.  I bounce between the thoughts of " the devil you know and the

devil you don't " and " I won't have Achalasia anymore! " , but I try to keep the

" won't have A " thoughts foremost in my mind.

Thank you all so much for always posting comforting words, as even if you're

just reading them towards someone else, they lift the spirits of many

kim in canada

[Guest guest]

Hi Kim,

I am relatively new here and have had the HM where the cut wasn't long enough

and only just had my first dilation. Fingers are still crossed after only one

week of eating a little normal food.

I hope your surgery goes well and you recover really quickly.

(Australia)

>

> Well, I've had a few weeks to process my newest situation, and now it's time

to share with you all

>

> A brief overview of my progression... I was diagnosed in June 1998 and had a

myotomy in an emergency situation in July 1998.  I've continued over the course

of the last 14 years to have severe spasms with periods of horrible dsyphagia.

 I've had at least 1 dilatation per year since, other than the last 2 years

where I was pregnant and then in between GI's/surgeons.  My surgeon retired last

year, leaving me in a situation where I was in a location where I had no surgeon

nearby.  He referred me to a surgeon about 3 hours from my house, but that ended

up not working out (really long story).  After spending last fall getting worse

and worse, we were lucky enough to get a new GI and a new thoracic surgeon at

the hospital an hour from our house.  I was seen urgently by the new GI for a

scope Dec 30 and given that view, sent urgently to the new surgeon for an

appointment the first week in January.  He scoped me 2 days later and then

scheduled a gastric

> emptying study (given the amount of food in my esophagus and stomach, even

after clear fluids, ie nothing for me, for 48 hours) and new upper GI.  Those

results came back 3 weeks ago, and after seeing my upper GI, and my husband

seeing it as it happened (he's an xray tech), we basically expected the news

that we received.  

>

> I'm scheduled for an ectomy on March 30 and I'll admit I'm quite nervous.

 Major surgery never really thrills me, and this certainly qualifies as that

type of situation  The state of my esophagus at this point is so beyond

repair.  It's twisting and I have fiberous bits there that don't look good.

 Thankfully, there is no sign of cancer or Barretts, so for that I am very

grateful.  It's *well* over 10cm, and is a mess from top to bottom.  The surgeon

just doesn't believe that I would get any sort of relief from another myotomy at

this point and after seeing everything I've seen (and feeling like I've been

feeling) I'm tending to believe him.

>

> Here's the kicker though, and the part that is making me post.  I've noticed

people in the last while posting about myotomies with no wraps.  I've found out

that my initial myotomy was incomplete, not going far enough into my stomach,

and that I had no wrap.  My surgeon has suggested that might be the cause of my

horrible spasms and part of the trouble with requiring so many dilatations

without any sort of relief over all these years.  Whether or not that is the

case is unknown, I'm sure.  But seeing some of you all mentioning vigorous

achalasia (which I was also told I have/had) and then the comments about myotomy

with no wrap, I wonder if there might be a connection.

>

> At any rate, I'll be in the hospital for 2 weeks or so, then back for that

lovely long recuperation, but despite my nerves, I'm looking forward to the new

road I'll be on.  I bounce between the thoughts of " the devil you know and the

devil you don't " and " I won't have Achalasia anymore! " , but I try to keep the

" won't have A " thoughts foremost in my mind.

>

> Thank you all so much for always posting comforting words, as even if you're

just reading them towards someone else, they lift the spirits of many

>

> kim in canada

>

>

[Guest guest]

Kim,

My thoughts and prayers are with you.  I am one of thoes that have had the

myotomy without the wrap and that is what we think has lasted so long for me;

plus I also have the vigerous version with a little gastricparesis thrown in. 

My first dilitation was in 1979 and my myomoty was in 1999 (20 years later

makes me feel good I went that long without having it), and I currently have a

dilitation about once a year depending on all the things that can go wrong, I

had 2 last year.  You have given me a lot to think about and the correlation

that all this could be connected.  I am always interested in the reasons of why

and how.

 

I will keep you in prayer that all goes well. 

 

God Bless

 

Sharon Cline

 

 

From: Kim <kimmydawn42@...>

Subject: my update

" achalasia " <achalasia >

Date: Tuesday, March 6, 2012, 6:36 PM

 

Well, I've had a few weeks to process my newest situation, and now it's time to

share with you all

A brief overview of my progression... I was diagnosed in June 1998 and had a

myotomy in an emergency situation in July 1998.  I've continued over the course

of the last 14 years to have severe spasms with periods of horrible dsyphagia.

 I've had at least 1 dilatation per year since, other than the last 2 years

where I was pregnant and then in between GI's/surgeons.  My surgeon retired

last year, leaving me in a situation where I was in a location where I had no

surgeon nearby.  He referred me to a surgeon about 3 hours from my house, but

that ended up not working out (really long story).  After spending last fall

getting worse and worse, we were lucky enough to get a new GI and a new thoracic

surgeon at the hospital an hour from our house.  I was seen urgently by the new

GI for a scope Dec 30 and given that view, sent urgently to the new surgeon for

an appointment the first week in January.  He scoped me 2 days later and then

scheduled a gastric

emptying study (given the amount of food in my esophagus and stomach, even after

clear fluids, ie nothing for me, for 48 hours) and new upper GI.  Those results

came back 3 weeks ago, and after seeing my upper GI, and my husband seeing it as

it happened (he's an xray tech), we basically expected the news that we

received.  

I'm scheduled for an ectomy on March 30 and I'll admit I'm quite nervous.

 Major surgery never really thrills me, and this certainly qualifies as that

type of situation  The state of my esophagus at this point is so beyond

repair.  It's twisting and I have fiberous bits there that don't look good.

 Thankfully, there is no sign of cancer or Barretts, so for that I am very

grateful.  It's *well* over 10cm, and is a mess from top to bottom.  The

surgeon just doesn't believe that I would get any sort of relief from another

myotomy at this point and after seeing everything I've seen (and feeling like

I've been feeling) I'm tending to believe him.

Here's the kicker though, and the part that is making me post.  I've noticed

people in the last while posting about myotomies with no wraps.  I've found out

that my initial myotomy was incomplete, not going far enough into my stomach,

and that I had no wrap.  My surgeon has suggested that might be the cause of my

horrible spasms and part of the trouble with requiring so many dilatations

without any sort of relief over all these years.  Whether or not that is the

case is unknown, I'm sure.  But seeing some of you all mentioning vigorous

achalasia (which I was also told I have/had) and then the comments about myotomy

with no wrap, I wonder if there might be a connection.

At any rate, I'll be in the hospital for 2 weeks or so, then back for that

lovely long recuperation, but despite my nerves, I'm looking forward to the new

road I'll be on.  I bounce between the thoughts of " the devil you know and the

devil you don't " and " I won't have Achalasia anymore! " , but I try to keep the

" won't have A " thoughts foremost in my mind.

Thank you all so much for always posting comforting words, as even if you're

just reading them towards someone else, they lift the spirits of many

kim in canada