Argh!

[Guest guest]

You are in my prayers!! Rabecca Whalen <rabeccawhalen@...> wrote:

I know this is the anxiety/aspie traits coming out in me, but I can’t sleep tonight because I am obsessing! Today was a wonderful day in most regards. I had fantastic childcare kids whose families are all excited about the summer calendars that I released. My daughter got to go to her first eye therapy appointment and is excited about having her vision fixed. My Aspie son’s school called to make sure that his dad and I were attending his 8th grade graduation in 10 days because he is being given the scholar award. My husband went to help at the church after work and came home with a couch for me to help recover for the teen room… Then he and the youth pastor took my aspie out for a late movie… Pretty good, huh? Well, right after my son, his pastor, and my husband left, my daughter noticed glass on the front room floor.

Apparently, while we were gone on one of our various runs today, someone shot a hole through my front window. It didn’t hit me right then. My first concern was that my daughter was bleeding from walking in broken glass. My second concern was that no one else get cut, so I cleaned up the glass and duct taped the window. I talked to the only neighbor I knew would still be awake, who of course didn’t see anything. Then, since my daughter and I were home alone and she was stressing out, I got her out of here for about half an hour (made the excuse that we had to get something from the store). When we got back, I gave her a special treat and then sent her off to bed. Now that the police finally came and I have talked to them (they can’t do anything because of not having any suspects or motive or anything to go on… we can’t even find

the bullet which is probably lodged in a wall or cushion somewhere in the front room.) Anyway, now that everything is all settled, I am freaking out and stressed to the max. My husband and son won’t get back from Star Wars until after midnight, and I am usually a to bed by 9 type of person.

Logically, I know that we are safe. No one is out to get us or has any reason to shoot at our house. Most likely, it was a pellet and not a real bullet even. Most likely, it was a teen boy in the neighborhood (we have lots of them) who was showing off for friends as they went down the street and we were a random hit). I doubt that anyone will ever do it again. They are going to be so worried about being accused, that I doubt if we will ever even see them out with a gun again (which I guess is even a positive outcome). Yet, I can’t seem to let it go! If someone wanted to cause real damage, we had plenty of vehicles they could have hit or damaged. They could have sprayed the house or vandalized it. They could have done something that could have actually endangered us by doing it when we

were home… But I can’t even conceive of that being a possibility.

The worst part is that I know that when my son gets home, he is going to react exactly how I am (fortunately or unfortunately, we are two peas in a pod… which means I really understand him but that if I can’t figure out how to overcome something, he also often stumbles over the same problem… perhaps it is because I give him a path to follow… but whatever, it makes it tough sometimes!!!). If I don’t figure out how to get myself talked down, how am I going to calm him down enough so that he can sleep/function??? I do not want to resort to anti anxiety medications, because I don’t want him to use them as a crutch either… Yet we both may end up taking melatonin to sleep tonight!!!

Give me luck, and thanks for giving me a place to vent/distress!!!

~hugs~

Rabecca

[Guest guest]

Hi there Rabecca,

It is GOOD to hear from you. Yep! I would say you are obsessing, your husband bringing home the couch would have done it for me!!! How are you doing now? I would say you are just way too stimulated from way too many things, but I know there is hardly any solution for it. Exercise does help some but I can't go out and do it much because if the intense allergies I have from grass pollen this time of year.

I am being a little bit humorous here, about the couch, and I hope it helps you some, as I have a life much like yours in this regard also. And I think I have almost gone nuts the last few months. But as I have thought upon things I have realized that I was not actually going nuts, but was just OVERSTIMULATED, which I am ALL the time pretty much. Day in, day out!

Last night I came to the conclusion within myself that I just wish the HYPE would die down, you see I realized the problem right there. But how to get it to die down, now there is the question. Thinking differently and more rationally certainly does help, and just sitting in a quiet house, even for short breaks.

And I have realized too that who I am around has a great affect on me. Seems like the barriers to letting in too much stimulation have been plowed over by certain melodramatic people I have to deal with in my life, and I need to build them back up with BRICKS instead of straw like I had them before. Like for example, I take care of three little grandchildren every day, and for some reason they get bored quite easily and want me to entertain them. Aaaaaaa! When I was a kid, mom said, "Go out and play!!!" And we went, stayed out all day. But alas, these kids won't go out that much, and even when they do I watch them like a hawk, worried somebody is going to steal one of them. I never let them out of my sight, and there is no way I would let them go to the store, or anything else, without me. I guess this is a sign of the times.

And too I try to do a LOT with them. Like yesterday, my granddaughter, Sierra, who is 8 and in 2nd grade was having a magician come to her class on account of her class had won the Jog a Thon at the school, and raised the most money. I had taken my grandson, , to the Jog a Thon and we completed a few laps also, and Sierra ran 14 laps! Well I had pledged $4. a lap, thinking she would do like last year, 6, so had to pay the school $56.

Well yesterday I took Lucas, 10 mo., along to see the magician, in his stroller, and it was quite fun and exciting and I got all hyped up, as usual. And last Sat., my son Jeff came down, and he left his two kids, and the four of them stayed overnight with me, and we did a lot of things. And I had to take my mom, age 86, to the eye doctor this week because she was really quite convinced she had glaucoma, but found she didn't, had to wait for her for 2 hours, all the time with my stomach hurting, and then take her to the store for 2 hours more. I have to take her wheelchair and lift it in, and out of the car, in order for her to use it.

And my daughter, Tara, the mother of these three, found out she has scoliosis in her spine last week, has been suffering from back pain and headaches for quite some time, and never knew she had this until she went to a chiropractor the other day! Aaaaaaaa! So she was quite mad and irritable about that for days. And today she is 35 years old, and more hype, as I am going to make her dinner, get a cake, and give her money. She works full time but is usually broke because she is married to an alcoholic. Not a happy situation for a mother to be in I will tell you that for sure!

Just sharing so you can get some perspective, maybe you reading my letter will help you, like me reading your letter helped me. We are just too STIMULATED, and we need some rest from it I think. Oh yes, and my son, Marty, the disabled one with all the problems. He has had a little cough, and looks to me like he does not feel so good, and I am wondering if I need to take him to ER and get a chest ex-ray, as he almost died in Jan. from pneumonia, and he needed surgery on one of his lungs for. And it is hard to tell what bothers him because he cannot speak and tell you anything at all. Aaaaaaaaaaa!

And I don't know if you are anything like me, but I have this odd idea in my head that I am supposed to be SUPER WOMAN. If I get the least little bit tired, or run down, which I am doing quite a lot these days, I PANIC and think I am dying from something mysterious. Hardly ever can I settle down and say to myself, well maybe I am just TIRED!

I don't know why.

As to the bullet through your front window, that is scary! I remember once a long time ago we had a bullet in the back of our van. My husband had stopped in front of the pizza parlor, and he and our two older sons had gone in to get a pizza, and my disabled son and my little daughter were in the van. I heard a loud noise like something hitting metal and got out and looked at the van, and right above the back tail light there was a hole. So the bullet went into the side of the van from the back, a heavy old 1970 Dodge van.

A slight little bit into the van and it would have surely shot somebody, and a slight little bit the other way and we would have never known about it. Anyway my husband called the police and they looked around there in a field, and told us that a rifle bullet could travel a looooooooong ways, so there was probably no way to find who shot the gun off, oh yes and it was dark out.

Well that is about it from here. Think we probably had better figure out how to settle ourselves down. I go to church, and I ask God for help all the time with this. I had anxiety real bad for about a year, and usually can keep the stress level down pretty much so I don't get it, but it turned on my stomach now, so I have to take some high powered acid pills to try and keep that down. I guess stress is always going to pop up somewhere or other in us.

I don't know if you are like me, but just seeing that I am doing too much, and am too stimulated from it all, have had a life time of TOO MUCH, if you know what I mean, helps me.

What I need is a break. But when it gets too quiet, that is when I REALLY panic. Heeeeeeeeeeeeelp!!!!!

Love to you all,

Carolyn

Argh!

I know this is the anxiety/aspie traits coming out in me, but I can’t sleep tonight because I am obsessing! Today was a wonderful day in most regards. I had fantastic childcare kids whose families are all excited about the summer calendars that I released. My daughter got to go to her first eye therapy appointment and is excited about having her vision fixed. My Aspie son’s school called to make sure that his dad and I were attending his 8th grade graduation in 10 days because he is being given the scholar award. My husband went to help at the church after work and came home with a couch for me to help recover for the teen room… Then he and the youth pastor took my aspie out for a late movie… Pretty good, huh? Well, right after my son, his pastor, and my husband left, my daughter noticed glass on the front room floor.

Apparently, while we were gone on one of our various runs today, someone shot a hole through my front window. It didn’t hit me right then. My first concern was that my daughter was bleeding from walking in broken glass. My second concern was that no one else get cut, so I cleaned up the glass and duct taped the window. I talked to the only neighbor I knew would still be awake, who of course didn’t see anything. Then, since my daughter and I were home alone and she was stressing out, I got her out of here for about half an hour (made the excuse that we had to get something from the store). When we got back, I gave her a special treat and then sent her off to bed. Now that the police finally came and I have talked to them (they can’t do anything because of not having any suspects or motive or anything to go on… we can’t even find the bullet which is probably lodged in a wall or cushion somewhere in the front room.) Anyway, now that everything is all settled, I am freaking out and stressed to the max. My husband and son won’t get back from Star Wars until after midnight, and I am usually a to bed by 9 type of person.

Logically, I know that we are safe. No one is out to get us or has any reason to shoot at our house. Most likely, it was a pellet and not a real bullet even. Most likely, it was a teen boy in the neighborhood (we have lots of them) who was showing off for friends as they went down the street and we were a random hit). I doubt that anyone will ever do it again. They are going to be so worried about being accused, that I doubt if we will ever even see them out with a gun again (which I guess is even a positive outcome). Yet, I can’t seem to let it go! If someone wanted to cause real damage, we had plenty of vehicles they could have hit or damaged. They could have sprayed the house or vandalized it. They could have done something that could have actually endangered us by doing it when we were home… But I can’t even conceive of that being a possibility.

The worst part is that I know that when my son gets home, he is going to react exactly how I am (fortunately or unfortunately, we are two peas in a pod… which means I really understand him but that if I can’t figure out how to overcome something, he also often stumbles over the same problem… perhaps it is because I give him a path to follow… but whatever, it makes it tough sometimes!!!). If I don’t figure out how to get myself talked down, how am I going to calm him down enough so that he can sleep/function??? I do not want to resort to anti anxiety medications, because I don’t want him to use them as a crutch either… Yet we both may end up taking melatonin to sleep tonight!!!

Give me luck, and thanks for giving me a place to vent/distress!!!

~hugs~

Rabecca

[Guest guest]

Raven,

Guess all that hard work paid off this week. It's great your show

went so well and that you got to know people were walking away with

your music going thru their heads. It must be an awesome feeling

you get at these times.

Kim

[Guest guest]

Kim wrote: " ... <snip> ... It's great your show went so well and

that you got to know people were walking away with your music going

thru their heads. It must be an awesome feeling you get at these

times. "

Thank you, Kim. And yes, it is so totally positively overwhelmingly

cool to experience this feeling. Despite how traumatizing preparing

for a show is (I am shy so I really have to work up to being out there

as a performer), the feeling from not only doing a great job but

having original music accepted as cover tunes are accepted is an

amazing feeling. Plus last night validated that the songs that will

make it to the CD in the Fall are solid which is always a good

thing. :-)

Raven

[Guest guest]

Vennitta wrote:

> I was doing so well, then a pinched nerve, okay, well that was about

> month ago. Last weekend a major flare-up! I haven't been able to workout

> since last Friday...and I'm still on dial-up - THE HORROR OF IT ALL!

::gasp:: dial-up! ugh! i am so very glad to be finally done

with that, i hope that you are too very soon.

im really sorry to hear about the pinched nerve, vennitta i

know how painful that is.

but dont worry, you will get back into the swing after you have

recovered, and we will all still be here to cheer you on.

take care!

:*carolyn.

[Guest guest]

You are all so great! Thanks everyone. I still can't workout but at least I'm now I have Fios (fiber-optic Internet access), for phone, TV and internet. I'm loving it, it's so fast, faster than my old DSL. I was able to find a 20 " LCD TV for 199.99 from wal-mart.com, shipping was only 7.97. There was an overstock.com paper in the box so you all may be able to find one there...nope, I just checked.

The LCD TV is really nice and with Fios the picture is so clear and sharp. I have a small apartment so a 24 " inch TV is the largest size recommended, having a 20 " LCD makes me want a larger one lol, I won't be buying another TV.

hopefully i'll be able to catch over the weekend.take care all,VennittaOn 6/27/07, Festival City Concrete/ & Carolyn Visser

<pvisser@...> wrote:

Vennitta wrote:

> I was doing so well, then a pinched nerve, okay, well that was about

> month ago. Last weekend a major flare-up! I haven't been able to workout

> since last Friday...and I'm still on dial-up - THE HORROR OF IT ALL!

::gasp:: dial-up! ugh! i am so very glad to be finally done

with that, i hope that you are too very soon.

im really sorry to hear about the pinched nerve, vennitta i

know how painful that is.

but dont worry, you will get back into the swing after you have

recovered, and we will all still be here to cheer you on.

take care!

:*carolyn.

-- Get Fit! Weight loss will follow

[Guest guest]

HI!

Glad you're out of dial-up h#ll! I'm interested in

FIOS only b/c I hate Comcast so much! LOL! I agree,

once you go to high speed there is no going back. We

had dial up until a year ago - I don't know how I

managed - especially since i work at home twice a

week. It used to take so long to download documents,

etc. I'd get up and clean while I waited!

Take care,

Donna

--- Vennitta <vciera@...> wrote:

> You are all so great! Thanks everyone.

>

> I still can't workout but at least I'm now I have

> Fios (fiber-optic Internet

> access), for phone, TV and internet. I'm loving it,

> it's so fast, faster

> than my old DSL. I was able to find a 20 " LCD TV for

> 199.99 from

> wal-mart.com, shipping was only 7.97. There was an

> overstock.com paper in

> the box so you all may be able to find one

> there...nope, I just checked.

>

> The LCD TV is really nice and with Fios the picture

> is so clear and sharp. I

> have a small apartment so a 24 " inch TV is the

> largest size recommended,

> having a 20 " LCD makes me want a larger one lol, I

> won't be buying another

> TV.

>

> hopefully i'll be able to catch over the weekend.

>

> take care all,

>

> Vennitta

>

> On 6/27/07, Festival City Concrete/ & Carolyn

> Visser <pvisser@...>

> wrote:

> >

> > Vennitta wrote:

> > > I was doing so well, then a pinched nerve, okay,

> well that was about

> > > month ago. Last weekend a major flare-up! I

> haven't been able to workout

> >

> > > since last Friday...and I'm still on dial-up -

> THE HORROR OF IT ALL!

> >

> > ::gasp:: dial-up! ugh! i am so very glad to be

> finally done

> > with that, i hope that you are too very soon.

> > im really sorry to hear about the pinched nerve,

> vennitta i

> > know how painful that is.

> > but dont worry, you will get back into the swing

> after you have

> > recovered, and we will all still be here to cheer

> you on.

> > take care!

> > :*carolyn.

> >

> >

>

>

>

> --

> Get Fit! Weight loss will follow

>

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[Guest guest]

Vennitta wrote:

> Now my sciatic nerve is acting up s & %$, d*$ & it. My chiropractor say

> working out will aggravate it, but, well, I just have to work out.

oh no vennitta! i hate that sciatic nerve thing too :/ you can

still workout! just do upper body, abs, stretching... whatever you

can do without pain. after recovery, daily stretching of the

affected areas have helped me keep sciatica at bay (glutes,

hamstrings and lower back for me). but please do try to rest as

much as possible... if you dont and this condition doesnt go away,

you will be sentenced to physical therapy (at least that is what my

dr said would happen to me if i didnt take it easy for a while).

:*carolyn.

[Guest guest]

So I started at the gym. I figure if I cane tone things up a bit before surgery

then it would be a good thing. I saw a physical trainer today and she told me I

HAVE to eat more. I couldn't get it through her head that food doesn't always go

down, and then when it does it isn't guaranteed to stay down. I think she

thought I was trying to starve myself to get thin. ARGH!!

Jenn

Sent from my CrackBerry® powered by Virgin Mobile.

[Guest guest]

It annoys me when I explain to people what is happening, and they still don't

really get it! A family member yesterday told me to make a healthy smoothie

during the middle of the night if I was hungry. Something like celery, fruit or

carrot all blended together! She didn't get that acidic stuff is not good, and

if I had that I would have to sit up for another 3 hours!

>

> So I started at the gym. I figure if I cane tone things up a bit before

surgery then it would be a good thing. I saw a physical trainer today and she

told me I HAVE to eat more. I couldn't get it through her head that food doesn't

always go down, and then when it does it isn't guaranteed to stay down. I think

she thought I was trying to starve myself to get thin. ARGH!!

>

> Jenn

> Sent from my CrackBerry® powered by Virgin Mobile.

>

[Guest guest]

Lol!! I'm right with you on that one , people drive me nuts!

Sent via BlackBerry by AT & T

Re: Argh!

It annoys me when I explain to people what is happening, and they still don't

really get it! A family member yesterday told me to make a healthy smoothie

during the middle of the night if I was hungry. Something like celery, fruit or

carrot all blended together! She didn't get that acidic stuff is not good, and

if I had that I would have to sit up for another 3 hours!

>

> So I started at the gym. I figure if I cane tone things up a bit before

surgery then it would be a good thing. I saw a physical trainer today and she

told me I HAVE to eat more. I couldn't get it through her head that food doesn't

always go down, and then when it does it isn't guaranteed to stay down. I think

she thought I was trying to starve myself to get thin. ARGH!!

>

> Jenn

> Sent from my CrackBerry® powered by Virgin Mobile.

>

[Guest guest]

A *whole* lot of people are right there, Jenn. Including a goodly number of

various medical people. If you *can* eat, you simply cannot even *imagine*

someone not *being ABLE* to do so. Think how long it took for the medical

community, much less the general public, to GET anorexia and bulimia . . . .

More than twenty years or so. And the numbers are HUGE [ " in the United States,

as many as 10 million females and 1 million males are fighting a life and death

battle with an eating disorder such as anorexia or bulimia. " ]. If the MEDICAL

COMMUNITY as a whole is stumped, and the GIs are stumped, it's not likely that

friends or relatives or trainers are going to " get it " eh.

Just hang in, and consider that part of your job now is " education " Lol! You

may save someone else's life (a cousin, friend, neighbor of the listener).

Be well on this journey.

xox,

>

> So I started at the gym. I figure if I cane tone things up a bit before

surgery then it would be a good thing. I saw a physical trainer today and she

told me I HAVE to eat more. I couldn't get it through her head that food doesn't

always go down, and then when it does it isn't guaranteed to stay down. I think

she thought I was trying to starve myself to get thin. ARGH!!

>

> Jenn

> Sent from my CrackBerry® powered by Virgin Mobile.

>

[Guest guest]

For anyone that doesn't have it they just don't get it. I like to joke with my

friends when we go out for dinner and they suggest things they think I would be

able to eat and I alays say " Sure if they can just blenderize that for me it

would be great " My friends neice asked me yesterday if blenderize was a real

word and I said in my world it is!!

 

Kim A

________________________________

From: lindsayaus <lindsay_kite@...>

achalasia

Sent: Tuesday, February 7, 2012 8:20 PM

Subject: Re: Argh!

 

It annoys me when I explain to people what is happening, and they still don't

really get it! A family member yesterday told me to make a healthy smoothie

during the middle of the night if I was hungry. Something like celery, fruit or

carrot all blended together! She didn't get that acidic stuff is not good, and

if I had that I would have to sit up for another 3 hours!

>

> So I started at the gym. I figure if I cane tone things up a bit before

surgery then it would be a good thing. I saw a physical trainer today and she

told me I HAVE to eat more. I couldn't get it through her head that food doesn't

always go down, and then when it does it isn't guaranteed to stay down. I think

she thought I was trying to starve myself to get thin. ARGH!!

>

> Jenn

> Sent from my CrackBerry® powered by Virgin Mobile.

>