explanation of hell by chemistry student

[Guest guest]

> HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT

>

> The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington

> chemistry mid term.

>

> The answer by one student was so " profound " that the professor shared it

> with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have

> the

> pleasure of enjoying it as well :

>

> Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic

> (absorbs

> heat)?

>

> Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas

> cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

>

> One student, however, wrote the following:

>

> First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time.

> So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the

> rate

> at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a

> soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As

> for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different

> religions

> that exist in the world today.

>

> Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their

> religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these

> religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can

> project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they

> are,

> we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now,

> we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law

> states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the

> same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

>

> This gives two possibilities:

>

> 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls

> enter

> Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all

> Hell

> breaks loose.

>

> 2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in

> Hell,

> then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

>

> So which is it?

>

> If we accept the postulate given to me by during my Freshman year

> that, " It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you, " and take

> into

> account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be

> true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen

> over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it

> follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is, therefore,

> extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a

> divine

> being which explains why, last night, kept shouting " Oh my God. "

>

> THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.