heartwarming - i had to share

[Guest guest]

Well ladies grab your tishues this one is heartwarming. I think its a good

one to share in our group since so many of us worry about the stares our

kids can get and before or after surgery every child on this site is

beautiful on the outside as well as the inside and I believe our

experiances(through the whole ordeal of cranio and plagi have helped make us

more beautiful on the inside as well....hope you liked this story as much as

I did.

- Kansas City, MO

Mommy of Austen born with a normal head 12/21/96

&

Leigha born 7/22/00

bicoronal CS dx 2/14/01 - CVR surgery with FOA 5/01/01

DOC Band 5/25/01- 9/24/01

www.geocities.com/leighasmygirl/Leigha-CS.html

, my two-year-old daughter, and I were walking down the street toward

home one sunny morning when two elderly women stopped in front of us.

Smiling down at , one of them said, " Do you know you are a very

beautiful little girl? "

Sighing and putting her hand on her hip, replied in a bored voice,

" Yes, I know! "

A bit embarrassed by my daughter's seeming conceit, I apologized to the two

ladies and we continued our walk home. All the way there, I was trying to

determine how I was going to handle this situation.

After we went into the house, I sat down and stood in front of me. I

gently said, " , when those two ladies spoke to you, they were talking

about how pretty you are on the outside. It's true you are pretty on the

outside. That's how God made you. But a person needs to be beautiful on

the inside, too. " As she looked at me uncomprehendingly, I continued.

" Do you want to know how a person is beautiful on the inside? " She nodded

solemnly.

" Okay. Being beautiful on the inside is a choice you make, honey, to be

good to your parents, a good sister to your brother and a good friend to the

children you play with. You have to care about other people, honey. You

have to share your toys with your playmates. You need to be caring and

loving when someone is in trouble or gets hurt and needs a friend. When you

do all those things, you are beautiful on the inside. Do you understand

what I'm saying? "

" Yes, Mommy, I'm sorry I didn't know that, " she replied. Hugging her, I

told her I loved her and that I didn't want her to forget what I'd said.

The subject never came up again.

Nearly two years later, we moved from the city to the country and enrolled

in a preschool program. In her class was a little girl named Jeanna,

whose mother had died. The child's father had recently married a woman who

was energetic, warm and spontaneous. It was readily apparent that she and

Jeanna had a wonderful, loving relationship.

One day asked if Jeanna could come over to play for an afternoon, so I

made arrangements with her stepmother to take Jeanna home with us the next

day after the morning session.

As we were leaving the parking lot the following day, Jeanna said, " Can we

go see my mommy? "

I knew her stepmother was working, so I said cheerfully, " Sure, do you know

how to get there? " Jeanna said she did and, following her directions, I

soon found myself driving up the gravel road into the cemetery.

My first response was one of alarm as I thought of the possible negative

reaction of Jeanna's parents when they learned what had happened. However,

it was obvious that visiting her mother's grave was very important to her,

something she needed to do; and she was trusting me to take her there.

Refusing would send her a message that it was wrong of her to want to go

there.

Outwardly calm, as though I'd known this was where we were going all along,

I asked, " Jeanna, do you know where your mother's grave is? "

" I know about where it is, " she responded.

I parked on the road in the area she indicated and we looked around until I

found a grave with her mother's name on a small marker.

The two little girls sat down on one side of the grave and I sat on the

other and Jeanna started talking about how things had been at home in the

months leading up to her mother's death, as well as what had happened on the

day she died. She spoke for some time and all the while , with tears

streaming down her face, had her arms around Jeanna and, patting her gently,

said quietly over and over, " Oh, Jeanna, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry your

mother died. "

Finally, Jeanna looked at me and said, " You know, I still love my mommy and

I love my new mommy, too. "

Deep in my heart, I knew that this was the reason she'd asked to come here.

Smiling down at her, I said reassuringly, " You know, Jeanna, that's the

wonderful thing about love. You never have to take it away from one person

to give it to another. There's always more than enough to go around. It's

kind of like a giant rubber band that stretches to surround all the people

you care about. " I continued, " It's perfectly fine and right for you to

love both your mothers. I'm sure your own mother is very glad that you have

a new mommy to love you and take care of you and your sisters. "

Smiling back at me, she appeared satisfied with my response. We sat quietly

for a few moments and then we all stood up, brushed ourselves off and went

home. The girls played happily after lunch until Jeanna's stepmother came

to pick her up.

Briefly, without going into a lot of detail, I told her what had occurred

that afternoon and why I'd handled things as I had. To my profound relief,

she was very understanding and appreciative.

After they left, I picked up in my arms, sat down on a kitchen chair,

kissed her cheek and hugged her tightly and said, " , I'm so proud of

you. You were such a wonderful friend to Jeanna this afternoon. I know it

meant a lot to her that you were so understanding and that you cared so much

and felt her sadness. "

A pair of lovely, dark brown eyes looked seriously into mine as my daughter

added, " Mommy, was I beautiful on the inside? "

_________________________________________________________________

Send and receive Hotmail on your mobile device: http://mobile.msn.com