Re: On institutionalization of HIV orphan children in India

[Guest guest]

Dear friends,

I would like to share a few comments about the institutionalization of

children. Basically there is no good or bad thing regarding where a child

grows. Most of our commentaries are based on the presumption that family is

the only solution. As we know there are good and bad families. Most of the

so-called social out castes are also coming from the families.

This is also applicable to Institutions. The organizational culture and

motivations of the organizers are very important. From my experience SOS

village is a good system except the fact that it also gives an indication

to the children that family is the only solution. Let us make it very clear

that it's not a system in itself that make things functional but that only

supplement it. Basic thing is the drive behind it.

Now about care for HIV positive children. There are families kicked their

men and women out of families because of their HIV status. We love to die of

war but of HIV is a shame. Care for children whether they are sick or HIV

positive,is the obligation of the entire society. We expect our children to

support us when we are old. Forget it...family is a hang over. Every

ideologists must remember that other way is also possible...

love

subhash

e-MAIL: <swfk@...>

[Guest guest]

Dear friends,

Greetings from CHES.

CHES has been caring for children orphaned due to AIDS

since late 1993 and I have been involved in their care

from very beginning.

I do agree that institution are not the solution or

the best substitute for a child.

There is a lot of discrimination when it comes to

people infected with AIDS. Many talk about stigma and

compacting the same on stage, infront of a public

address system. But when it comes to reality it is

different. Why? We say our awareness levels are sky

high or are they really earth low!!

This discrimination is worst among children. They

silently suffer this discrimination. Children

especially those infected are sent out of families by

their close relatives such as uncles, aunts on reasons

such as - the child has TB or has Skin problem or had

diarrhea or has been urinating every where or fear it

might bite my child while playing, it may spread by

cough or the mosquito is high among our area. Whatever

amount of education, sensitization or counseling

leaves our social workers with questions such as " can

you confirm that my child will never get AIDS by

living together " .

Once in a training program for doctors, especially

child physicians, there was a question to one of the

stalwarts from New Jersey {who had come to Chennai

through FXB to train doctors as a team} " will you

assure us that HIV doesn't spread through tears and

sweat then we will think of touching these children!

This questions was asked after a week training.

From my experience this issue of stigma or child

rights or deinstitution is very difficult to handle

especially with reference to HIV. Also we should

understand before saying India should not have

institution set up. There should be support at all

levels.

Our experience has taught us the round about way. If

only we had started to talk child rights and rights of

positive children I am sure we would not proceeded

further. Many donors even told us " Why should we spend

on children who will die before they are even

celebrate their first birthday " . Today we have many

who are joining us.

Once there was an uncle who came with a girl child who

had lost both her parents to this dreaded disease

AIDS. We had a long talk with the uncle and spoke to

him about his role, why he does not want to keep the

child, the child's emotions of being suddenly thrown

out of the family etc . The uncle said he would talk

to his wife and would come back. But he never turned

up. We are not sure whether the child lives with him

or else has be thrown in to some garbage yard.

Caregivers working for children know the difficulty

that they face and such issues of some one else

deciding about their work is so difficult to accept.

At any time have any one asked such group whether such

homes are needed? Once one of friend said I went to

Africa and I saw 500 child headed families and the age

of the head was 10 to 12 years. So he said when they

can manage at Africa why not at India. Suppose our

child is in that state would we welcome this. Reader

can write to me of how they feel when I say this.

What we need is a holistic comprehensive program. We

need every support for such children. Handling

children infected, affected, vulnerable, or from

disrupted family or destituted are all different. They

can never be treated in the same way. African models

may not work for India. What works at New Delhi may

not work in Chennai. Please take the best practices

and develop models out of that for current situation.

People working with children should take this

seriously and wake up.

Dr.Manorama

E-mail: pmanorama@...