update and some of my journal

[Guest guest]

I was going through my journal on this awful adventure and wanted to share a few

thoughts....these were from Oct. 22,23 2004 and we atill arw homeless and just

got back again from our local doctor.....more Leviquin....but it will not make

us well.....

Donna Godfrey

We just got mail that Epoch property has opened a new complex and it is full of

mold and a man contacted us because they had to move him and are moving more and

it is brand new! Now how do we get Epoch sited for not building right...no

flashings at the windows and where does the water go. Our lawyer thinks this has

nothing to do woth it!

By the way we were evicted.....and than called back again because they wanted to

know what to do with the stuff!

**************************************************

As we got closer to Metro West and Park Ave I felt so sick......so used......so

abused....so uncared for. Not by my family but by those that seek to make money

and do not care about anyone or anything. If health and well being gets in their

way....so be it...hide it and shove it and let someone else suffer.

As we went down the stairs to our apartment the smell of toxic mold met you and

that horrible metallic taste came and the burning of the nose. We had to go in

and get out valuable papers from the safe but even to do that is unsafe and you

know it. But the drive within you to save just a piece of your life is great. As

I walked through the door seeing boxes all over the place, unpacked, furniture

in a mess I shed tears. What was this place anyway? A home? A refuge? No a sick

place that makes us sick. It had my pictures, my furniture, my clothing and my

stuff but it all was turning me sick.

We quickly got a few things and by that time we had a headache, awful burning up

our nose, jitters, sore throat and burning skin. And out we cane with just a few

precious things. But why even bother with that? I drag things to mom's and I

wash them....sometimes 7 times to get out the smell of toxins but cannot....all

blends are gone.....I have tried all I know with my collection of books...1st

editions and cookbooks but nothing can save them. I try to was pieces of

Pre-Civil War laces my MIL left to me for my creating but why? They still smell

after using all the experts told me to try. So contractor bag after contractors

garbage bag goes to the dumpster with even more hopes dashed......why did I even

try to save something? Maybe it is busy work.....maybe keeping me sane.

I am numb. I am at a loss to know what to do.....I cannot feel. My mind gets

blank. Panic sets in but that scares me because I am a woman of deep faith in

God. My faith is important to me. It sustains me but as I pick up the Bible I

draw a blank. My thinking process is not working right. They say the toxins do

this to your mind. What else can Park Place take from me....my health....my

stuff and my mind? I am fighting mad at that thought!

What happened in our apartment? What did they keep asking if all was OK.

What did they know and why did they put us there. Now how can they try to evict

us when we cannot even go in there and pack? Why do they want the pain and

suffering to go on. Why can they not tell us what toxins we may have been

exposed to so we can get help. Is our health not that important to them?

How can I see my precious husband suffer....losing a job, a home and now his

health.....He cares about those folks and know so many do not even know why they

are so sick.....What was taken from him? His worth as a man to work and care for

the family....He is listless and uncertain and this is from the strongest man I

know with a deep faith in God too. H e has lived in the mold in our house, he

has worked on the kinds of mold in many apartments and altogether it has made

him a very sick man. I see his fear about will he have to be on

disability....will we need long range counseling because of all we have lost,

the trauma, and the panic? How will pay that? They did not allow us to work long

enough to even pull insurance and I believe it was because they hired to

pawn him off to the new owners.

23rd.

We just got back again from making sure there was not an eviction notice put on

the door.....as we turned into Park Ave. I got mad.....mad....mad....why can

this be done to us? Who has the right to take my health, my family life and my

stuff because they are too crazy for money to care for the residents they get

rick off of? How can they through me out when we have no lease and asked

several times for one? Who decided we could go in a toxic apartment and see what

would happen? Who decides our lives do not count.....

Let me tell you what I saw today....I start drinking my coffee and a part of my

tooth falls out....not a good tooth but my gums are bleeding and my teeth are

falling and in 3 weeks I have a daughters wedding. How can I go looking like

this? Can I go? I look at my skin which has always been beautiful.....so they

tell me and in the last month it has wrinkled and looks awful. I try to read my

email and my eyes do not focus. My left eye is drooping and has a rash and is

infected I think.....I make my living sewing but cannot do my fancy work. My

mind does not function and my eyes will not permit me to do stitches. I have a

wedding veil to do, a fancy ring bearers pillow to do and cannot. This will be

my only wedding for my daughter and it is her first and the joy and love I

planned to put into these things has been robbed from me.

Than came the shakes and the feeling of walking on space...that still may be

from the meds. I have slept no more that 4 hours since this nigh mare started

and really slept good at the apartment and never without a over the counter

sleeping aid because my face burned, my nose burned, I coughed all night. I

thought it was from the hurricanes and it was in part that that made the mold

spores so awful. The feeling of lead weights on my legs began again today and

the pain in my face is unbearable.

I take a bath and see now I have some fungus around my middle....ugly white

spots. They burn, they itch. Where my bra is there is always burning. I need new

ones but when one has no job, no income you have to wear what you have. I put on

a shirt and sweat and again smell that toxins and change. My poor mom and I wash

all day long....

Tonight my son calls. Now here is . We have has to send him to Georgia to

stay with his sister. He is scared and alone and mad....Mad at all we are going

through. Mad he has no home....mad we cannot get to him....mad and hurt and

alone. I cry. He cries...we fuss because we cannot seem to come to grips with

what is happening. I am a mother who adopted this child that was so abused. I

gave him a home, I have loved him, prayed for him and been a mother to him and

now he needs me and I cannot be that for him. I have had to send him away. His

adoptive heart feels that and is broken. I know because I was adopted too. The

pain and suffering it is putting on him is killing me. My heart is breaking. I

feel his pain and I cannot take much more. I want my family. I want a home, a

nest however simple but a safe place to cook and nurse us back to health....but

how can that be? No job....no stuff....no money.....are we forever

homeless.....who will care? Where can we go for help?????Who really

cares?????

All depends on the lawyers and big business. I feel like a useless pawn that is

not needed. I unwanted part of society. But guess what? I am mad enough to fight

for my family and for all those at Park Ave that are sick and suffering. My goal

is to have that apartment brought up to standards and made right. They must

never allow another family to feel like they are dying like we are. They must

punish these ruthless and evil men.

My invitation to them is this....go spend the night in my apartment....sleep in

those toxic beds, eat from those toxic dishes(even the pans are discoloring),

sit at that couch, wear my toxic clothes, wipe you mouth with the toxins on the

napkins and than tell me you do not understand. And if that is not enough than

how about we take the mold spores and mold from the walls and take them to your

house and expose your stuff and your family and you see if you want to lose all

that is important to you....the things that make you want to go home and enjoy

at night. And if the court cannot understand this than maybe I need to introduce

their homes to the same. One minute in our apartment and the smell will tell you

that you best be getting out....remember biological warfare is made from the

toxins of mold.....try to live with that terror for one night!!!!!!

Donna Godfrey

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

> I was going through my journal on this awful adventure and wanted

to

share a few thoughts....these were from Oct. 22,23 2004 and we atill

arw

homeless and just got back again from our local doctor.....more

Leviquin....but it will not make us well.....

> Donna Godfrey

I am sorry you are going through this. That we all are being treated

so

pooly. My husband had seizures and blood clots but he is stronger

than

I am now. Now my mother has mold in Florida and received her

eviction

notice. She is in a condo on the ocean, I am hoping the condo won't

want to be shut down and they will settle. She is too old for this.

I told her to film it like a reality type thing so people can see

this

on tape. Might be an idea. She is just starting this nightmare, the

sad

thing is now I can't see her because her stuff is contaminated and

she

is so far away.