Re: How do you respond?

September 21, 2004

NT is a huge concept to get into even if you're really into it. If you're

not i would consider it insurmountable, so you're probably asking too much

from your parents to read ingredient lists and so on. However, you are

certainly entitled to lay down the law about what your kid eats, esp. when

you're the one dealing with the aftermath. In addition to making a list i

think it may be up to you to prepack all the food they can eat -- frozen

meals, snacks, etc. Or you can just accept the fact that you can't totally

control your kids and they're going to eat crap, and that you'll never

change your parents. But making it easy for your parents will help, although

it's more work for you. You have to remember they grew up in a time when

real food was still the norm. I think many older people aren't aware of all

the chicanery that's gone on in the food industry in the last fifty years.

Elaine

> Hi all, coming out of lurking to ask how you handle stupid comments and people

> who refuse to work with you and your NT diet, specifically the kids. We have

> tried several diets over the years, and my parents see this as just another

> diet. My mom asks what about the blood type diet and I explain that we are

> still using that (we are all O+, so we went to sprouted breads, grains, red

> meat and chickens, a few years ago), that we have just gone another step

> beyond.

>

> Before I started reading NT and WAP website info, I would allow certain things

> once in a while at my moms that I just can't do anymore. Part of it is that

> as my 6 y/o gets healthier, his tolerance for these poisons lessens, and I can

> see a cause and effect relationship with him and food. If he drinks a soda

> at their house, and he comes home with a stomach ache and diareeaha, plus gets

> violent until he settles back into his diet, usually 2 days to get back to

> normal. My mother refuses to see this as causal, telling me " there are just

> so many things to watch out for in him " and " everything in moderation. " My

> dad took my 9 y/o on vacation earlier this summer and when he came back,

> thought there was something wrong with my son because he didn't indulge in

> candy 2-3X's per day, even though he was " given permission. " When I point out

> studies, I am told that there are studies to prove anything, and that " just a

> little shouldn't hurt him " .

>

> They do agree that I can send him with food for him, but then they also have

> garbage food there, so why would he make good choices when he is basically in

> a candy store? He is getting better at making choices, as he feels the

> effects of eating poorly, but tonight on the phone, my mom again harangued me

> about she doesn't know what to feed him. BTW, all I have asked her to get rid

> of is snacks with hydrogenated fat, high fructose corn syrup, and refined

> sugar, nothing about grass fed meats, fermented foods, etc. I think that the

> basis of my frustration is really my relationship with my parents, and not

> wanting to cause waves. I was thinking of having my naturopath put together a

> list of foods that are okay for him to eat, but they think she is not really a

> Dr. and even though they agree that the kids have been better since seeing

> her, they think it is more or less a fluke.

>

> Any ideas would be welcome, TIA

> Dona

> Life is too short to eat grocery store cheese.

>

September 21, 2004

>Hi all, coming out of lurking to ask how you handle stupid comments and people

who refuse to work with you and your NT diet, specifically the kids. We have

tried several diets over the years, and my parents see this as just another

diet. My mom asks what about the blood type diet and I explain that we are

still using that (we are all O+, so we went to sprouted breads, grains, red meat

and chickens, a few years ago), that we have just gone another step beyond.

You know, what is interesting as I view other people responding

to " stupid comments " is that the more dogmatic and even silly

their stance is, the more people respect them. That is, if someone

says " I am eating this way because I am commanded to by my

spiritual leader XYZ " people back off, or if they say " I am following

the diet plan ABC " they back off too. But if they tentatively and

politely try to justify what they are doing, they get attacked.

I call this the " injured chicken " response. If one chicken in a group

is injured and bleeding, the others *attack* it and kill it. Don't ask

me why, but that is their response, and it seems to be the response

of humans to a person who is tentative. But if a chicken is nasty

and abusive (as most roosters are) the chickens just respect that.

Heidi Jean

September 21, 2004

At 08:54 PM 9/20/2004, you wrote:

>Hi all, coming out of lurking to ask how you handle stupid comments and

>people who refuse to work with you and your NT diet, specifically the

>kids. We have tried several diets over the years, and my parents see this

>as just another diet. My mom asks what about the blood type diet and I

>explain that we are still using that (we are all O+, so we went to

>sprouted breads, grains, red meat and chickens, a few years ago), that we

>have just gone another step beyond.

what i have done, what several of my friends have done and what i advise my

clients to do is tell the grandparent/aunt/friend/whatever in question that

if they will not respect your choices about food, they will simply not be

able to spend any time with the child unsupervised. you have to be willing

to make good on that claim! for the most part it lets them know that you're

really serious and they're likely to be more respectful. and if they're

not, you know what to do!

with regard to school and day care, you have to decide: is it more

important for you to have the kids follow the diet you set for them, or

more important to have the daycare/school? many of my clients have started

homeschooling because of this, and i completely advocate that decision,

though it's just not possible for everyone. the best you can do if you

choose school is teach your child not to eat things it ought not to.

good luck!

katja

September 21, 2004

--- In , " Dona " <unschool@c...>

wrote:

> Hi all, coming out of lurking to ask how you handle stupid

comments and people who refuse to work with you and your NT diet,

specifically the kids.

We've been dealing with this issue for a while because of Gluten-

intolerance issues. Here's some things that helped us:

1. I put in WRITING all the things to avoid--using the names most

easily found on the ingredient labels.

2. I pack/prepare as many food substitutions as possible. Even

pancakes can be possible if you pre-mix all the dry ingredients and

just write on the bag the rest of the directions. Be sure to take

things to thicken sauces, your own kind of pasta, etc. We even pack

our own condiments.

3. I dazzle them with something from MY diet that I know they will

love--usually breakfasts. Coffee cakes, scones, muffins, etc., can

all be made mostly NT and start everyone's day off on the right

foot. Plan enough to serve everyone.

4. I compromise, quietly. I know we won't HAVE any options on

organic foods, raw milk, pasture eggs, so I don't make it an issue.

There will be TONS of sugar available all day . . . my kids know

going in that they are expected to balance their own selections

according to our " home rules. "

5. Offer to go shopping with them after you arrive. Most likely

they are just leary of making ANY decision because it might be

wrong.

6. Keep 'em. My mother-in-law still has not figured out a gf diet

after 15 years! I just accept it and spend lots of time in the

kitchen while I'm visiting. If I'm there while she's cooking I can

make small course corrections along the way.

Our visits are usually limited to twice a year now, and granted, we

are present with the children. The issue of unchaperoned visits

hasn't come up yet. Perhaps you could limit the visits to those

times when you can be present as well?

September 21, 2004

>with regard to school and day care, you have to decide: is it more

>important for you to have the kids follow the diet you set for them, or

>more important to have the daycare/school?

It also depends on the school. Ours was VERY responsive

as soon as I said " allergy " ... and if you DO have a doctor's

diagnosis (and some doctors are more reasonable about

this than others) then by law they are required to help,

even provide meals in some cases, though I wouldn't

trust them on that. However, it is harder on the child, and

my heart just broke when I came in once, unexpected,

and saw these little cupcakes on every single desk

except my daughter's ... she was ok with it, but it struck

me how isolating that must be, and we are homeschooling

her now. It's not just the food, but the whole atmosphere

is different ... like, when they were teaching the food

pyramid and how fats are bad and don't eat much meat,

and making craft projects with macaroni, and having pancake breakfasts.

Plus, they have a lot of handouts that are provided by food

manufacturers, like Nabisco touting Oreo cookies.

Heidi Jean

September 21, 2004

Dona,

I feel for you. I have an 11-month-old, and I think I would kill my

parents if they continually tried to give her garbage to eat. By the

way, my mother-in-law always uses the ol' " everything in moderation "

line (so I guess even a bit of cocaine in moderation couldn't hurt

). I know I'm going to have a tough time with my in-laws when it

comes to feeding my daughter junk. I think the only thing you can do

is stick to your guns and, if you have to, make it so that your

parents only see your son when you're around so you can supervise.

Also remind them that this is YOUR child not theirs, and you're not

trying to deprive him of " goodies " (if that's what one can call that

processed garbage), but that you're trying to keep him healthy and

happy. Maybe you could have them over for an NT dinner to show them

that you're not eating alfafa sprouts and wheat germ (what most people

think " health food " is). You might even top the dinner off with some

nice NT vanilla ice cream, so that they can see how tasty a healthy

dessert can be.

I'd love to hear how it goes for you. I have a feeling I'm going to

be in the same boat as you very soon with my in-laws.

Ciao,

Dawn

> Hi all, coming out of lurking to ask how you handle stupid comments

and people who refuse to work with you and your NT diet, specifically

the kids. We have tried several diets over the years, and my parents

see this as just another diet. My mom asks what about the blood type

diet and I explain that we are still using that (we are all O+, so we

went to sprouted breads, grains, red meat and chickens, a few years

ago), that we have just gone another step beyond.

>

> Before I started reading NT and WAP website info, I would allow

certain things once in a while at my moms that I just can't do

anymore. Part of it is that as my 6 y/o gets healthier, his tolerance

for these poisons lessens, and I can see a cause and effect

relationship with him and food. If he drinks a soda at their house,

and he comes home with a stomach ache and diareeaha, plus gets violent

until he settles back into his diet, usually 2 days to get back to

normal. My mother refuses to see this as causal, telling me " there

are just so many things to watch out for in him " and " everything in

moderation. " My dad took my 9 y/o on vacation earlier this summer

and when he came back, thought there was something wrong with my son

because he didn't indulge in candy 2-3X's per day, even though he was

" given permission. " When I point out studies, I am told that there

are studies to prove anything, and that " just a little shouldn't hurt

him " .

>

> They do agree that I can send him with food for him, but then they

also have garbage food there, so why would he make good choices when

he is basically in a candy store? He is getting better at making

choices, as he feels the effects of eating poorly, but tonight on the

phone, my mom again harangued me about she doesn't know what to feed

him. BTW, all I have asked her to get rid of is snacks with

hydrogenated fat, high fructose corn syrup, and refined sugar, nothing

about grass fed meats, fermented foods, etc. I think that the basis

of my frustration is really my relationship with my parents, and not

wanting to cause waves. I was thinking of having my naturopath put

together a list of foods that are okay for him to eat, but they think

she is not really a Dr. and even though they agree that the kids have

been better since seeing her, they think it is more or less a fluke.

>

> Any ideas would be welcome, TIA

> Dona

> Life is too short to eat grocery store cheese.

>

February 22, 2005

hi patti- i hope you saw my post yesterday with the criteria that they use

to determin pdd. depression and withdrawal can also be a result of

communication frustration and can affect the ability and desire to communicate

in other

ways so depending on the severity of the speech problem there is other criteria

that can lead to the missdiagnosis of asd and many of the kids are tested

right after their third birthday so they can get into the preschool program

and

the question i have is this; if my child had been diagnosed with apraxia first

would he had been given the educational diagnosis? I DOUBT IT. it is

possible to have both but it is important to know what is atypical,

developmentally

appropriate, and the result of communication frustration and we need to contact

a professional that has the capability to do that. the autism team only need

to be considered about autism. they are also working for the school also .

autism was ruled out in our case by a psychologist with 20 years of experience

working with children with dissabilities at the alfred healy clinic in iowa

city. a person who has had a stroke may lose their desire to get out of bed but

that does not necessarily mean that they can never walk again. apraxia is not

as well known as asd and that is why people need to be educated about apraxia.

charlotte henry

February 22, 2005

hi patti- autism is so well known and one of the things that needs to be done

is that educators need to be made aware of other disorders that have symptoms

that may alter the test results when given the adosg, for example ; a child

may withdraw because they have a inability to communicate which can result in

a failure to develop peer relationships appropriate to developmental level

and lack of social or emotional reciprocity and that was the case with my son so

we met the 1st 2 categories of part 1 and you have to meet 2 parts of the 1st

part one part of part 2 must be met and in the case of an apraxic

child a delay in or total lack of the development of spoken language not

accompanied by an attempt to compensate through alternative modes of

communication

such as gesture or mime and one from part 3 which in our case

was encompassing preoccupation with one or more stereotyped and restricted

patterns of interest that is abnormal in intensity or focus and in our case it

was

a comfort item my son had just turned 3 and as he

got older we saw changes that also changed our opinion

the inability to communicate or the inability to

speak even with the ability to communicate in other ways can affect alot of

other things and cause withdrawal, lashing out, depression and all those things

could change the outcome of that test and my son could not have met that

criteria if his speech problem did not exist that may be why so many kids with

apraxia are missdiagnosed with asd. that doesnt mean that you cant have both. it

is

important that we know the difference between atypical behaviors,

developmentally appropriate behaviors and behaviors that can be a result of

communication frustration and that we see the whole picture and not just pieces

of the

puzzle and that is why we need to make sure we are evaluated by somone who is

knowledgable to all of the above and may need the aid of many professionals to

tell the difference and if your professional is truly only interested in

autistic traits we might not get the speech therapy that we needed. i hope this

helps

June 15, 2005

Why the urge to respond?

Feel sorry for the clod...

Unless he's your landlord.. then haul his butt into court with an appropriate

lawsuit..

============================

[] How do you respond?

How do you respond when someone says that the mold issue is junk science;

that mold occurs everywhere in nature and it's the biggest scam in town?

June 15, 2005

If you put a petri dish outside, you will get a wonderfully colorful

plate of mold of large variety. I think the difference is there are

thousands of different types of mold. Outside you are exposed to very

small amounts of thousands of different types. Not enough of any one

type to make a headway into doing you harm. INside is there is a

colony growing, you get lots of one type and they can make changes in

your health, especially if you are run down from something else. It's

the constant exposure to a single type or two. Then also the toxins

they emit build up in house and nowhere to escape. Outside they are

carried off into atmosphere. You aren't breathing the same toxins day

and night; you are breathing in the same type of mold day and night.

The difference is in the concentrations. Many healthy people will

withstand indoor situation also but others for many different reasons

will succumb to health problems from it. Factors of frequency of

contact, home all the time, etc; other health conditions that make

your immune system overburdened, age (both very young and older), etc.

> How do you respond when someone says that the mold issue is junk

science;

> that mold occurs everywhere in nature and it's the biggest scam in

town?

>

June 15, 2005

Kim,

Different response: don't bother to respond. Find someone else to

talk to about it. It isn't worth your time. Too many people who

are 'supposed' experts say the opposite so you are wasting your

efforts. Spend them on doing something positive for your own health,

rather than trying to convince other people who are resistent.

Barb B

> How do you respond when someone says that the mold issue is junk

science;

> that mold occurs everywhere in nature and it's the biggest scam in