's Motd Friday March 14, 2008

[Guest guest]



Still StrugglingMarch 14, 2008I received a letter a few days ago from a lady who wrote me saying, ", you're thin now. And I'm sure it's easy for you to stay that way because you do everything so perfectly."Well, I must tell you, her comment was so far from the truth. See, in my younger days, I was not very nice to myself. I would get up in the morning just hating myself because I was so fat. I'd begin my day by marching into the kitchen and eating a big-old fattening breakfast. And when I finished my giant first meal of the day, I would just persecute myself!I'd look in the mirror and say the most horrible things about me...to me. I'd really put myself down with comments like, "You're no good! God wasted a life when he made you. You can't do anything right. You're just a slob...a fat, disgusting slob!"And on the way to school, I'd finish the horrible conversation I'd begun with myself. I would eat lunch in the school cafeteria and after I finished lunch, I'd get angry with myself, all over again! By the time I returned home, I'd often go lay in bed and try to hide from it all.As many of you know, I turned to eating disorders to get my weight down. And after I would take laxatives or had forced myself to throw-up, I'd go back to beating myself up some more. What a terrible cycle, huh?Thankfully, I've come a long way since those dark days of my past. But I still struggle each and every day with my own food battles, just like many of you. Sometimes, when I really want to eat something I know I probably shouldn't, I try and talk myself out of it. Then I may tell myself that since I've been so good, I deserve to eat those three chocolate-covered strawberries. I'lI have this little internal argument with myself over those chocolate-covered strawberries. Most of the time, I win the fight. But sometimes I'll lose it, too. And on those occasions when I lose the fight and indulge, I get very upset with myself for giving in. So you see, the lady I told you about earlier really had the wrong idea about me. I mean, are you and I really so different? You know what happens to me when I drive past a bakery? Oh, I'm sure, I feel the same temptation you feel.And when I go to the grocery store, I want to fill my cart with some naughty foods, just like you want to do. And, you know, maybe that's the reason why I can be here for you. Because I have overeaten in your shoes.Now, when you indulge, don't do like I used to and run up to the mirror and belittle yourself. Just buckle up and try to eat better the next meal...and the next. One thing that really helped me out was that every time I said something negative to myself, I would turn right around and say two nice, positive things about myself. And the majority of times, it really works for me.I want you to remember something else. And that is that no one is a "perfect" eater. We're all human and, sometimes, we have to have that chocolate chip cookie.

Be nice to yourselves this weekend as you face your food challenges. And I want you to know, I'll be doing the same, right along with you!

Love,