Humor: Thanksgiving Weather Forcast

[Guest guest]

THANKSGIVING FORECAST

Turkeys will thaw in the morning, then warm in the oven to an afternoon

high near 190F. The kitchen will turn hot and humid, and if you bother

the cook, be ready for a severe squall or cold shoulder.

During the late afternoon and evening, the cold front of a knife will

slice through the turkey, causing an accumulation of one to two inches

on plates. Mashed potatoes will drift across one side while cranberry

sauce creates slippery spots on the other.

A weight watch and indigestion warning have been issued for the entire

area, with increased stuffiness around the beltway. During the evening,

the turkey will diminish and taper off to leftovers, dropping to a low

of 34F in the refrigerator.

Looking ahead to Friday and Saturday, high pressure to eat sandwiches

will be established. Flurries of leftovers can be expected both days

with a 50 percent chance of scattered soup late in the day. We expect a

warming trend where soup develops. By early next week, eating pressure

will be low as the only wish left will be the bone.