Guest guest Posted September 6, 2005 Report Share Posted September 6, 2005 --- carondeen <kdeanstudios@...> wrote: I am suicidal and desperate at this > point. > , I don't know anything about lawsuits but I know about suicidal and desperate as that is where I am right now. I would suggest that you get out of the house and try to go somewhere affordable and better than your house. I have stayed in cheap motel rooms for about 11 days now and they are moldy, some worse than others. I think I posted that I am probably going to buy a tent today and live in an RV park and when it is cool enough to live in a tent back home, I may go back there and set up the tent in my yard. In fact if it is cool enough where you are you could do the same. Wal-Mart has a large, two-room tent for about $100. Big enough to have a living room with a TV and small refrigerator and a bedroom. I have put a gun to my head many times recently and I could not pull the trigger so I guess I am stuck with living but I have prayed for death. This may not be good advice but it has worked for me so far. When my brain feels so bad I cannot take it anymore, I drink vodka cut with Smirnoff's ICE bottle drink. I don't like to do that but this feeling normally happens at night time and I do what I have to do to stay alive. I am not a doctor, not that they know anything, so this is not medical advice. Bob ______________________________________________________ Click here to donate to the Hurricane Katrina relief effort. http://store./redcross-donate3/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 6, 2005 Report Share Posted September 6, 2005 Bob and , I know I posted about it at some point or other, but don't know where it is now. The depression is part of the illness. The first time it got me, I didn't know what it was or what caused it, but I sat for nearly 2 years with a loaded pistol not 2 feel away from me on a shelf. I swore if it got one bit worse, I'd eat a bullet, and I meant it sincerely. I'm completely surprised I'm still here. This time around, I have had days and moments not a whole lot better. But there's one major difference. I now know what caused this misery. And I know I'm gonna get better. I don't know how much better yet, but I know I'm not trapped in hell forever quite like I was before. And I know I'm not the only one. Not nearly. You can choose to believe it or not, but there are times when the only reason I keep going is because I'm not gonna see one more of us die over this without a fight - and if that includes yours truly, then so be it. So that's your choice right there. You can fight or you can quit. And if you choose the fight, then you have to know right up front there are going to be days or weeks on end when you're gonna do little more than take up oxygen and wait for your next opportunity to get your licks in. The fighting's easy. The waiting is hard. Real hard. This weekend, my uncle died. He was asking for me, and I couldn't go to him. I watched the old family home blown away forever, and there was nothing I could do. No idea what's become of them all. Of course I made myself sicker by crying over it all. Then I had to wait for the pharmacy to open so I could get some decongestants and get on with waiting some more. And wait for the new prescriptions to come in so I can get stronger and fight some more. And wait and wait and wait. So of course, I wonder what's the use? What do I do but complain and rant about it all and wait around endlessly like a lump? But then I saw your posts. THAT is the use and THIS is what I do about it all. So. You'll do as you will. But not without me fighting you if I can. We're dry and we're fed, and a whole lot better off than some right now. And when they finally go back to their moldy city, they're gonna be needing us. It would be cool if you decided to stick around and be here for that, too. Serena www.freeboards.net/index.php?mforum=sickgovernmentb __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 7, 2005 Report Share Posted September 7, 2005 > Building a new- hoped to be mold free home- while I was away for a day- the framers used allot of moldy wood to build the house- After alot of wrangling I got them to remove it- they where supposed to take it away but left it on the side- 3 weeks went by befor I was able to get it all out of the house completly. Now, after being at the beach for 3 days- and am as good as it gets- walking into the framed and roofed and closed in house slammed me good- where do I go from here? no lawsuit in the world is going to help with a perfectly built house that only invisible things are killing me. I am suicidal and desperate at this point. > Did you see my story about the firewood I snagged for campfires at Mt Whitney? Just a couple of really bad pieces left a bad zone where I stacked 'em at my campsite. Glad I was careful and boxed up the wood in cardboard boxes sealed with duct tape and set on the roof of my camper for the trip down. It would have been terrible if my trip had been ruined by contaminating my camper. But, I did it right, and the only harm was that there was a zone next to my campfire that I had to avoid. Needless to say, I burned up the bad wood straight away. Takes a couple of days, but the zone goes away after the moldy wood is gone - and then it's all back to normal. I suspect that the stack of wood left you such a zone and that in a week or so, you'll feel the effect diminish and eventually go away. - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 7, 2005 Report Share Posted September 7, 2005 and all, Now I am begining to second think myself. I assumed that by the time I got them to take out the moldy wood, it had dried and sent out spore and toxin, it really burned me up bad after I was totally clean, the second time they used moldy wood, it took me 2 weeks to get it taken out. I feel that the wood that looks OK was either contaminated from being in the pile of black wood that was inside, or contaminated when it dried out. Seeing I can't decontaminate a wooden chair I like, I can't see how I can do the whole inside of a house . Loosing this will really be a life changer. The man who was going to spray the house with AGEIS suggests having the wood sandblasted with soda, what they do in NC when a house is moldy, he says it goes into the wood a bit. I just don''t wanr to throw away money at this point. > > Did you see my story about the firewood I snagged for campfires at > Mt Whitney? Just a couple of really bad pieces left a bad zone > where I stacked 'em at my campsite. > Glad I was careful and boxed up the wood in cardboard boxes sealed > with duct tape and set on the roof of my camper for the trip down. > It would have been terrible if my trip had been ruined by > contaminating my camper. > But, I did it right, and the only harm was that there was a zone > next to my campfire that I had to avoid. Needless to say, I burned > up the bad wood straight away. Takes a couple of days, but the zone > goes away after the moldy wood is gone - and then it's all back to > normal. > I suspect that the stack of wood left you such a zone and that in a > week or so, you'll feel the effect diminish and eventually go away. > - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 7, 2005 Report Share Posted September 7, 2005 Seeing I can't decontaminate a wooden chair I like, I can't see how I can do the whole inside of a house . Loosing this will really be a life changer. The man who was going to spray the house with AGEIS suggests having the wood sandblasted with soda, what they do in NC when a house is moldy, he says it goes into the wood a bit. I just don''t wanr to throw away money at this point. > > Soda? Never heard of that treatment... wonder if it prevents recurrence? But if it did, that might be the way to go. My experience and the concurrent anecdotes I've heard from others is that if an object that is exposed on a long term basis to mycotoxins, it will build up a considerable charge of badness that may not go away for an unacceptibly long time. Things that have only momentary exposure which are of a nature that surface spores can be easily removed clean up with no problem. But even hard plastic or wood that has been exposed long term has a long term effect on me despite ANY amount of remediation. So if your chair was exposed long term, it can stay " bad " for a very long time. But if the wood structure of the house had a mold of lesser toxicity and lower duration of exposure, resolving the mold and preventing recurrance would probably suffice - at least for me, but there are some caveats. There is a " Point of no return " to this immune inflammatory progression and once a person has gone over the threshold, coming back takes actions of an extreme nature that are incomprehensible to anyone who has never been close to dropping into this living Hell. The question at this point is not whether any objective tests of the materials can point you at a proper course of action, it is whether you are at a point beyond which your reactivities will allow you to deal with the variables at hand. These reactivities are of such specificity and variability that determining acceptible levels of contamination cannot be realistically assessed by any other person. Learning MADNESS is very much like flying your own plane. An experienced person could do it for you - but if you want to do it on your own, you have no other option but to rely on your own expertise - and " fly or die " accordingly. My experience is that the most toxic molds are heavily reliant upon substrate and conditions to produce the specific toxins that bother me, and that controlling these conditions neutralizes toxic properties, even if mold growth is still present. I refuse to go nuts worrying about all mold. Mold is natural and necessary to life on this planet. It is only the toxin producers that require my attention. I think that the real recipe for disaster is not so much the mold on the wood structure does just while growing on that wood, as what the mold is capable of doing when condensation in the walls combines with the molds access to the the paper backing on fiberglass insulation and " mold preloaded wallboard " . I take issue with the entire concept of reducing relative humidity in the middle of a room to prevent mold. This does nothing to prevent moisture at the condensation interface on the exterior of the walls - I don't give a damn what the " experts " say. You see this even out in the desert where the Rh is lower than one could ever achieve in a humid climate with even the most powerful dehumidifiers. Open up enough walls and you will see this effect for yourself. Look on the North " cold " walls of houses where the paper backing has been reversed to the outer wall and you will see the enhanced mold growth correlates to the area of greatest condensation potential often enough to confirm the basic concept that the building design lends itself to disaster. And if one provides mold with the proper ingredients at that vapor interface of semi-decomposed cellulose in the form of paper backing - the mold will take full advantage of the opportunity. The " vapor barrier " is a rotten idea when the vapor is encouraged to form in the exact location on the ideal material that mold utilizes to produce potentiated toxins. - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 7, 2005 Report Share Posted September 7, 2005 Thank you very much for the time to answer, I concur with all you say. Have tried to address the issue with variouse upgrades, the Ageis sprayed before insulation, no vapor barrier, and glass faced gypsum board. The right insulation is still a question mark. Desperate as I am, I am going to look into the soda issue-I really don't want to loose my 3rd house and last dough to a lawsuit and mold. Had allready planned on sleeping out of doors to help the damping down of my immune response, as I have not been able to sleep outside here due to marauding dogs and a rabies epidemic. allmost one year out of mold,I have become a great mycotoxin geiger counter. Wish there was money to be made from it. > Soda? > Never heard of that treatment... wonder if it prevents recurrence? > But if it did, that might be the way to go. > > My experience and the concurrent anecdotes I've heard from others is > that if an object that is exposed on a long term basis to > mycotoxins, it will build up a considerable charge of badness that > may not go away for an unacceptibly long time. > Things that have only momentary exposure which are of a nature that > surface spores can be easily removed clean up with no problem. > But even hard plastic or wood that has been exposed long term has a > long term effect on me despite ANY amount of remediation. > So if your chair was exposed long term, it can stay " bad " for a > very long time. But if the wood structure of the house had a mold > of lesser toxicity and lower duration of exposure, resolving the > mold and preventing recurrance would probably suffice - at least for > me, but there are some caveats. > There is a " Point of no return " to this immune inflammatory > progression and once a person has gone over the threshold, coming > back takes actions of an extreme nature that are incomprehensible to > anyone who has never been close to dropping into this living Hell. > The question at this point is not whether any objective tests of > the materials can point you at a proper course of action, it is > whether you are at a point beyond which your reactivities will allow > you to deal with the variables at hand. > These reactivities are of such specificity and variability that > determining acceptible levels of contamination cannot be > realistically assessed by any other person. > Learning MADNESS is very much like flying your own plane. > An experienced person could do it for you - but if you want to do it > on your own, you have no other option but to rely on your own > expertise - and " fly or die " accordingly. > > My experience is that the most toxic molds are heavily reliant upon > substrate and conditions to produce the specific toxins that bother > me, and that controlling these conditions neutralizes toxic > properties, even if mold growth is still present. > I refuse to go nuts worrying about all mold. Mold is natural and > necessary to life on this planet. > It is only the toxin producers that require my attention. > > I think that the real recipe for disaster is not so much the mold on > the wood structure does just while growing on that wood, as what the > mold is capable of doing when condensation in the walls combines > with the molds access to the the paper backing on fiberglass > insulation and " mold preloaded wallboard " . > I take issue with the entire concept of reducing relative humidity > in the middle of a room to prevent mold. This does nothing to > prevent moisture at the condensation interface on the exterior of > the walls - I don't give a damn what the " experts " say. > You see this even out in the desert where the Rh is lower than one > could ever achieve in a humid climate with even the most powerful > dehumidifiers. > Open up enough walls and you will see this effect for yourself. > Look on the North " cold " walls of houses where the paper backing has > been reversed to the outer wall and you will see the enhanced mold > growth correlates to the area of greatest condensation potential > often enough to confirm the basic concept that the building design > lends itself to disaster. > And if one provides mold with the proper ingredients at that vapor > interface of semi-decomposed cellulose in the form of paper backing - > the mold will take full advantage of the opportunity. > The " vapor barrier " is a rotten idea when the vapor is encouraged > to form in the exact location on the ideal material that mold > utilizes to produce potentiated toxins. > - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 7, 2005 Report Share Posted September 7, 2005 This problem is a nightmare. For all of us. Depression is a real and large part of what many of us suffer due to mold. Please don't feel alone. A friend of mine is a builder person, and he says there is a real problem with moldy wood in new construction. It is difficult to get dry wood in some parts of the country. I think the workers may have used the moldy wood anyway. I have had workers do things like that when my back was turned. It is exhuasting to have to monitor every single thing. If they didn't use it, the new wood they put up was obviously contaminated while wet. Maybe it will dry out, and it will subside. Can they put in heaters? Would that help? If there are glued wood products used in the house, it would send me into a fit. For me, that would be arguably worse than the mold on the outside of the wood, as it would linger for years, whereas the wood can dry out, and most outdoor mold might be not a problem, as many of them are not toxic. best wishes and good luck > Building a new- hoped to be mold free home- while I was away for a day- > the framers used allot of moldy wood to build the house- After alot > of wrangling I got them to remove it- they where supposed to take it > away but left it on the side- 3 weeks went by befor I was able to get > it all out of the house completly. Now, after being at the beach for 3 > days- and am as good as it gets- walking into the framed and roofed > and closed in house slammed me good- where do I go from here? no > lawsuit in the world is going to > help with a perfectly built house that only invisible things are > killing me. I am suicidal and desperate at this point. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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