Mom Confesses She Killed Autistic Child

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“McCarron, a former pathologist, testified she felt responsible for 's

autism because she allowed the child to get vaccinated.”

January 12, 2008

Mom Confesses She Killed Autistic Child

A woman accused of killing her autistic daughter testified Friday that she

attempted to suffocate the 3-year-old with a pillow three days before she

succeeded with a plastic garbage bag.

McCarron said she couldn't go through with it using the pillow. When

prosecutor asked her how long she held the bag over the toddler's

head soon after, she replied about two minutes — until little stopped

struggling.

In a videotaped confession played in court Thursday, McCarron said she began

having thoughts of hurting her daughter a year before the May 2006 slaying but

put them out of her mind. On the day of the killing, though, the thoughts were

stronger than ever.

" They were so intense, " McCarron said.

McCarron, 39, has pleaded not guilty by reason of insanity to murder,

obstructing justice and concealment of a homicidal death. She was found mentally

fit to stand trial, but a medical expert hired by her attorneys has said she was

insane at the time of the killing.

The trial resumes Monday.

McCarron, a former pathologist, testified she felt responsible for 's

autism because she allowed the child to get vaccinated. Some people believe

autism is caused by a mercury-containing preservative once used in childhood

vaccines.

It " brought me a great deal of guilt, " she said.

Using a plastic bag and the prosecutor's arm, McCarron demonstrated for jurors

in Tazewell County Circuit Court how she placed a bag over her daughter's head

and pushed her to her knees, the (Peoria) Journal Star and the Pekin Daily Times

reported.

" Were you able to see her face as she fell to the floor? " asked.

" Yes. I could see her face through the trash bag, " McCarron answered.

McCarron said she listened for a heartbeat after stopped struggling.

" I just put my ear to her chest, " McCarron said. " I heard one, then I heard

nothing. "

The child had scratch marks on her head and bite marks were found inside her

mouth and on the bag as she apparently tried to free herself, according to other

testimony.

The taped confession was made while McCarron was hospitalized after attempting

suicide, investigators said. Wearing a hospital gown, she appears sitting on a

bed next to her husband, McCarron.

McCarron said she killed her child hoping to " fix her " and give her peace

in heaven.

" Maybe I could fix her this way, and in heaven she would be complete, " she said

on the tape.

McCarron said on the videotape that she took her daughter's body back to

her own house and put her in bed. She then went to the store, bought ice cream

and returned to her mother's home to get the garbage bag because, " if things get

bad, their house would be searched. "

Interviewers asked McCarron if she knew what she did was criminally wrong.

" I have enough education to know that, " she answered.

McCarron told police she felt like a failure because of the child's autism and

was sad and hurt because the child couldn't interact with her very well.

" I loved very much, but I hated the autism so, so much, " McCarron said. " I

hated what it was doing to her. ... I just wanted autism out of my life. "

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