Re: Need Advice on How to Handle Daycare Situation

March 20, 2008

My first thought is that she has no right to disclose medical information to

anyone if you did not give her permission to do so. I know that when it is

the other way around and a child comes down with the chicken pox in school,

the school cannot tell me who has the chicken pox and they told me it was a

matter of privacy. I really think that she was out of line to disclose this.

But, she has told them so now what, I doubt if she even knows your rights in

this situation but she needs to be educated whether or not it works out that

you will be able to place your child there or not. As you are obviously

aware, the parents of the twins will not be easily convinced even though their

beliefs are ridiculous to me. I wish I could give you more advice but for now

the best that I can do is suggest that if you have to seek a new day care

provider that you have them sign something to the effect that they are not to

discuss your child's medical records with anyone without your written consent.

I am almost positive that they are supposed to abide by that.

Blessings,

Mavis

Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them.â€

Eph 5:11

_VACCINE RISK AWARENESS NETWORK - " PERSONAL STORY LINKS " _

(http://www.vran.org/links/story-links.htm)

_The Great HPV Vaccine Hoax Exposed_

(http://www.newstarget.com/Report_HPV_Vaccine_0.html)

_Vaccination Information & Choice Network - _

(http://www.nccn.net/~wwithin/vaccine.htm)

_Vaccination Liberation Home Page_ (http://www.vaclib.org/index.htm)

_ThinkTwice Global Vaccine Institute: Avoid Vaccine Reactions_

(http://thinktwice.com/) _National Vaccine Information Center_

(http://909shot.com/)

In a message dated 3/20/2008 9:50:50 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

ariannalaw68@... writes:

Hello everyone. I am mostly a lurker but have come accross a

situation that requires me to see advice. My husband and i are anti-

vax. I recently went back to work full-time and daddy is home with

our little girl until May. In may we were scheduled to take her to

a private home daycare. Its someone that we've known for a long

time and about two mths ago we met with her. When she asked us to

complete the vax forms we expressed our position. At that time she

said it would not be a problem. In fact she has contacted

the " State " and confirmed we are within our rights not to do so.

This morning i received a phone call from her telling me that one of

the parents is extremely concerned that there will be a non-vaxed

child around her twins.

The parents are apparently worried that my daughter will be

a " carrier of disease " and that her twins will get infected since

they are only vaxed up to 1yr. she apparently went on the internet

and looked up info. that suggested this would pose a risk to her

twins. When I asked my daycarer worker why she felt she had to call

each parent and tell them that there will be a non-vaxed child in

the mix she said she felt is was the right thing to do so that there

is open communication with everyone involved. I was upset at this

as I feel this situation could have been avoided.

She suggested that we meet this weekend in order to explain to

these parents why their twins will NOT be at risk from my daughter's

non-vax status. WHAT??? I was calm and responded my saying that I

do not think it would be a good idea as this is an extremely

political/emotional subject and doubt they would come out of it

understanding why we have made such a decision for our child. I

also told her that I am not debating my parenting decisions with

anyone.

I have researched this subject since 2005 in order to come to our

decision BUT I am not sure how well I would do if put on the spot -

in a confrontational setting. That is why I was hoping to get imput

on how to handle this situation. I know you guys are alot more

experienced at the non-vax parenting thing and was hoping you could

tell me if this meeting is a good idea . If we do meet with the

other parents what points besides the " if vaccines work and your

child is protected I should be the one worried " argument.

BTW - I left the conversation by stating that i would need to

discuss it with my husband but that my daughter not being vaxinated

is not up for discussion.

Hubby feels we should just go somewhere else - which all of you

working parents know is hard finding good childcare - esp. at the

last minute.

I think from her (childcare provider) perspective its... " I can

loose twins as customers " or " loose one (our daughter).

Input please???

love and peace to all

**************Create a Home Theater Like the Pros. Watch the video on AOL

Home.

(http://home.aol.com/diy/home-improvement-eric-stromer?video=15?ncid=aolhom00030\

000000001)

March 20, 2008

It was not made clear if the other parents already know WHO is not

vaxed which is illegal of her to disclose, but letting them know a

child is not vaxed is not illegal. Asking you to have a face to face

discussion with them is again disclosing WHO and she has no right to

do that.

>

> My first thought is that she has no right to disclose medical

information to

> anyone if you did not give her permission to do so. I know that

when it is

> the other way around and a child comes down with the chicken pox in

school,

> the school cannot tell me who has the chicken pox and they told me

it was a

> matter of privacy. I really think that she was out of line to

disclose this.

> But, she has told them so now what, I doubt if she even knows your

rights in

> this situation but she needs to be educated whether or not it works

out that

> you will be able to place your child there or not. As you are

obviously

> aware, the parents of the twins will not be easily convinced even

though their

> beliefs are ridiculous to me. I wish I could give you more advice

but for now

> the best that I can do is suggest that if you have to seek a new

day care

> provider that you have them sign something to the effect that they

are not to

> discuss your child's medical records with anyone without your

written consent.

> I am almost positive that they are supposed to abide by that.

> Blessings,

> Mavis

>

> Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead

expose them.â€

> Eph 5:11

>

> _VACCINE RISK AWARENESS NETWORK - " PERSONAL STORY LINKS " _

> (http://www.vran.org/links/story-links.htm)

>

> _The Great HPV Vaccine Hoax Exposed_

> (http://www.newstarget.com/Report_HPV_Vaccine_0.html)

>

> _Vaccination Information & Choice Network - _

> (http://www.nccn.net/~wwithin/vaccine.htm)

>

> _Vaccination Liberation Home Page_ (http://www.vaclib.org/index.htm)

>

> _ThinkTwice Global Vaccine Institute: Avoid Vaccine Reactions_

> (http://thinktwice.com/) _National Vaccine Information Center_

(http://909shot.com/)

>

> In a message dated 3/20/2008 9:50:50 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

> ariannalaw68@... writes:

>

> Hello everyone. I am mostly a lurker but have come accross a

> situation that requires me to see advice. My husband and i are anti-

> vax. I recently went back to work full-time and daddy is home with

> our little girl until May. In may we were scheduled to take her to

> a private home daycare. Its someone that we've known for a long

> time and about two mths ago we met with her. When she asked us to

> complete the vax forms we expressed our position. At that time she

> said it would not be a problem. In fact she has contacted

> the " State " and confirmed we are within our rights not to do so.

> This morning i received a phone call from her telling me that one of

> the parents is extremely concerned that there will be a non-vaxed

> child around her twins.

>

> The parents are apparently worried that my daughter will be

> a " carrier of disease " and that her twins will get infected since

> they are only vaxed up to 1yr. she apparently went on the internet

> and looked up info. that suggested this would pose a risk to her

> twins. When I asked my daycarer worker why she felt she had to call

> each parent and tell them that there will be a non-vaxed child in

> the mix she said she felt is was the right thing to do so that there

> is open communication with everyone involved. I was upset at this

> as I feel this situation could have been avoided.

>

> She suggested that we meet this weekend in order to explain to

> these parents why their twins will NOT be at risk from my daughter's

> non-vax status. WHAT??? I was calm and responded my saying that I

> do not think it would be a good idea as this is an extremely

> political/emotional subject and doubt they would come out of it

> understanding why we have made such a decision for our child. I

> also told her that I am not debating my parenting decisions with

> anyone.

>

> I have researched this subject since 2005 in order to come to our

> decision BUT I am not sure how well I would do if put on the spot -

> in a confrontational setting. That is why I was hoping to get imput

> on how to handle this situation. I know you guys are alot more

> experienced at the non-vax parenting thing and was hoping you could

> tell me if this meeting is a good idea . If we do meet with the

> other parents what points besides the " if vaccines work and your

> child is protected I should be the one worried " argument.

>

> BTW - I left the conversation by stating that i would need to

> discuss it with my husband but that my daughter not being vaxinated

> is not up for discussion.

>

> Hubby feels we should just go somewhere else - which all of you

> working parents know is hard finding good childcare - esp. at the

> last minute.

>

> I think from her (childcare provider) perspective its... " I can

> loose twins as customers " or " loose one (our daughter).

>

> Input please???

>

> love and peace to all

>

> **************Create a Home Theater Like the Pros. Watch the video

on AOL

> Home.

>

(http://home.aol.com/diy/home-improvement-eric-stromer?video=15?ncid=aolhom00030\

000000001)

>

March 20, 2008

Sheri -

Thank you for your insight. I am in Elmwood Park, NJ (Bergen County).

My instincts told me this " meeting " was a BAD idea. I just needed reassurance.

Any info. anyone else here can share is much appreciated.

love and peace

Arianna Mojica

Re: Need Advice on How to Handle Daycare Situation

>

>This morning i received a phone call from her telling me that one of

>the parents is extremely concerned that there will be a non-vaxed

>child around her twins.

Why is she sharing private medical information with other parents.

>The parents are apparently worried that my daughter will be

>a " carrier of disease " and that her twins will get infected since

>they are only vaxed up to 1yr.

So if they aren't protected by vaccines they received by 1 year -

why get them.

> she apparently went on the internet

>and looked up info. that suggested this would pose a risk to her

>twins. When I asked my daycarer worker why she felt she had to call

>each parent and tell them that there will be a non-vaxed child in

>the mix she said she felt is was the right thing to do so that there

>is open communication with everyone involved. I was upset at this

>as I feel this situation could have been avoided.

Exactly

Sounds like you don't want her there anyway

> She suggested that we meet this weekend in order to explain to

>these parents why their twins will NOT be at risk from my daughter's

>non-vax status. WHAT??? I was calm and responded my saying that I

>do not think it would be a good idea as this is an extremely

>political/emotiona l subject and doubt they would come out of it

>understanding why we have made such a decision for our child. I

>also told her that I am not debating my parenting decisions with

>anyone.

Good for you

>I have researched this subject since 2005 in order to come to our

>decision BUT I am not sure how well I would do if put on the spot -

>in a confrontational setting. That is why I was hoping to get imput

>on how to handle this situation.

I wouldn't even go there.

>I know you guys are alot more

>experienced at the non-vax parenting thing and was hoping you could

>tell me if this meeting is a good idea . If we do meet with the

>other parents what points besides the " if vaccines work and your

>child is protected I should be the one worried " argument.

>

>BTW - I left the conversation by stating that i would need to

>discuss it with my husband but that my daughter not being vaxinated

>is not up for discussion.

>

>Hubby feels we should just go somewhere else - which all of you

>working parents know is hard finding good childcare - esp. at the

>last minute.

I agree with hubby and I know it is hard finding good daycare.

>I think from her (childcare provider) perspective its... " I can

>loose twins as customers " or " loose one (our daughter).

I'm sorry for what you are going through, but she should have never

shared that info.

Where do you live - maybe others have some contacts for daycare where you live.

Or some of the other sources I shared for finding non-vax friendly

docs may help too

Sheri

________________________________________________________________________________\

____

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March 20, 2008

Unfortunately, we are all forgetting one thing. 9 times out of 10,

whether it's required by law or not to vaccinate, people who DO

vaccinate think that non-vaxing is wrong, and I'm assuming this woman

felt the need to tell the other parents because she felt that by your

child being unvaxed will be putting others at risk. She probably felt

she owed it to the parent to warn them, and obviously doesn't

understand anything about vaccines, whether she says she does or not.

So yes, what she did wasn't right, but knowing from experience that

people treat unvaccinated kids like they are a walking disease center,

she probably wasn't trying to ruffle any feathers, but to " protect "

her kids.

Where are you located? There are a lot of natural parenting lists

online, and more likely then not you can find a day care, school, or a

home based day care through recommendations.

I am going through the same thing with my unvaxed daughter, she will

be going into a school environment 3 days a week when she turns 2 so I

can go back to school. I was dead set on getting a baby sitter or

nanny, or a home day care, BUT after the experience I had this summer,

I will be putting her into a school because I feel it is safer.

I checked out some home based day cares, and got great reviews. My

neighbor has one in her home, and when I moved in she came over and

introduced herself, told me about the neighborhood, and introduced me

to her kids. I went into her home, met her day care children, saw her

play room, talked to her about her program, and she seemed great.

Then after a while we became " friends " and I come to find out that she

doesn't really supervise the kids, she yells at them, she claims to do

lessons with them and crafts and such, but she sticks them in front of

the TV all day and sits in her basement and smokes cigarettes and

plays on the computer. And while I know what day care providers do in

their own time is their business, but I came to find out that she

drinks heavily every night, smokes pot, and talks nasty about the kids

and their parents to anyone who listens. I actually was at her house

one day when a child fell and hit his head. I picked him up to

comfort him and she actually yelled at me for comforting him, said it

was his own fault, and let him cry because she told him not to climb.

I was so disgusted I ended the friendship, and am actually fearful for

the children there. I know this was an individual case, but I am

really leery on any home based day care now, and I thought they were

the way to go since they were in a home setting. She works with the

local county funded programs, and came very highly recommended.

It's very hard finding good care, especially when you don't really

know the real story. I'm dreading the entire process!

Good luck

: )

March 20, 2008

>

>This morning i received a phone call from her telling me that one of

>the parents is extremely concerned that there will be a non-vaxed

>child around her twins.

Why is she sharing private medical information with other parents.

>The parents are apparently worried that my daughter will be

>a " carrier of disease " and that her twins will get infected since

>they are only vaxed up to 1yr.

So if they aren't protected by vaccines they received by 1 year -

why get them.

> she apparently went on the internet

>and looked up info. that suggested this would pose a risk to her

>twins. When I asked my daycarer worker why she felt she had to call

>each parent and tell them that there will be a non-vaxed child in

>the mix she said she felt is was the right thing to do so that there

>is open communication with everyone involved. I was upset at this

>as I feel this situation could have been avoided.

Exactly

Sounds like you don't want her there anyway

> She suggested that we meet this weekend in order to explain to

>these parents why their twins will NOT be at risk from my daughter's

>non-vax status. WHAT??? I was calm and responded my saying that I

>do not think it would be a good idea as this is an extremely

>political/emotional subject and doubt they would come out of it

>understanding why we have made such a decision for our child. I

>also told her that I am not debating my parenting decisions with

>anyone.

Good for you

>I have researched this subject since 2005 in order to come to our

>decision BUT I am not sure how well I would do if put on the spot -

>in a confrontational setting. That is why I was hoping to get imput

>on how to handle this situation.

I wouldn't even go there.

>I know you guys are alot more

>experienced at the non-vax parenting thing and was hoping you could

>tell me if this meeting is a good idea . If we do meet with the

>other parents what points besides the " if vaccines work and your

>child is protected I should be the one worried " argument.

>

>BTW - I left the conversation by stating that i would need to

>discuss it with my husband but that my daughter not being vaxinated

>is not up for discussion.

>

>Hubby feels we should just go somewhere else - which all of you

>working parents know is hard finding good childcare - esp. at the

>last minute.

I agree with hubby and I know it is hard finding good daycare.

>I think from her (childcare provider) perspective its... " I can

>loose twins as customers " or " loose one (our daughter).

I'm sorry for what you are going through, but she should have never

shared that info.

Where do you live - maybe others have some contacts for daycare where you live.

Or some of the other sources I shared for finding non-vax friendly

docs may help too

Sheri

March 20, 2008

,

What a dreadful story!! That is why I am so devastated. I know this woman and

have complete confidence in how she would have treated my child - like one of

her own. I just think its as you said - the sheep mentality - not knowing or

putting the time to know makes them fearful. And since all they hear is

" protect your kids - get them vaccinated early " - what can you expect.

Every fiber of my being (including my husband) knows i am doing the right thing.

And believe me as many parents here have expressed - I would kill if anyone came

near my child with a needle. But its another story to try to convince others or

defend your position.

I will print out whatever information I can and share it with the daycare

provider in an effort to enlighten her. But i will not meet with anyone to

explain - my duty is to my child.

BTW - My husband called her and told her it was wrong for her to disclose such

information - even if she felt she was doing the right thing. She acknowledged

it. he told her ultimately its her decision but that we are not debating this

with anyone. We will continue to look elsewhere.

I am in Elmwood park, NJ (Bergen County).

..