shari: I did something crazy yet satisfying....long email

[Guest guest]

Way to go Shari!

Even I don't have the guts to do that. I haven't seen my original

PS in ages.

You rock,

:)Beth

> Hello all

>

> I did the craziest thing today that I just had to share... I guess

most of

> you know that I am fighting the battle w/ my disability through

work. Yesterday

> they called and said that they would partial pay but needed

medical records

> from my other docs since explant (weird - they won't approve me

based on fibro

> but they will if I can show them a timeline of events showing that

I went down

> hill since the implants-kinda the opposite of what I thought..)

>

> Anyways, I had to go today to my ENT's office to sign a release

for them to

> fill out my med records form for the disability people. I had my

little boy

> Logan with me and as usual I felt like crap. I went to the ENT'

office who

> happens to be the same complex as my original implanting PS. As

we were getting

> back into the car I was having trouble lifting him into his car

seat as usual

> and he said " mommy, are you still sick. but why are you so sick? "

the same

> questions he asks me daily that breaks my heart everytime he says

it. something

> hit me then - I am not sure what it was but I pulled him back out

of the car

> and went back into the bldg and down to the PS's office. I walked

in and there

> were several women in the waiting room filling out paperwork. I

just stood

> there holding him and didn't say a word for several minutes. The

lady behind

> the counter asked if she could help me (there were two at the

desk) and I said

> " No Ma'am... My baby son here was just asking me why I am sick for

the

> millionth time and I wanted to bring him here before his mommy

dies to let him see the

> place that made her sick and the reason why he also was sick.

Logan said " is

> this a bad doctor mommy? " and I said " well baby.... this is the

doctor that

> didn't tell mommy the truth and now I have made you sick too and I

am sooo,

> sooo sorry. " (I was tearing up) " This is also the doctor that

wouldn't help mommy

> after he made her sick when she was begging him for help " . Then I

smiled,

> thanked her, and walked right out the door. that lady's mouth

dropped and she

> didn't say a word - in the middle of it l looked up and saw that

the women in

> the waiting room had stopped and were staring at me and my son

with the look of

> fear in their eyes. Crazy - yes probably but man how good I felt

when I left

> there. It was like a ton of bricks of hatred were off of my

shoulders.

>

> just thought I would share that

>

> love

> shari