SHARI URGENT PLEASE

[Guest guest]

Shari I am concerned about you. If you need to get into see a

pshychiatrist let me tell you the trick I used and it got me in right

away. I simply told them I was suicidal! I know it seems bad to lie,

but your in crisis and you need help. I have to let you know though I

don't have a ton of faith in shrinks being that helpful, mostly they

will just give you drugs and then send you on your way. I mean maybe

you need meds but I kind of doubt it. It would be your option but I

will warn you that most of them made me feel totally crappy.

I was asking you about what exactly you do at your job because I too

had to work with brain fog and was terrified of making a mistake. I

was a unit secretary on the ICU and it was really a busy place with

tons of really sick and dying critical patients, I was terrified I

would srew up someones orders ya know, luckily though the secretary

is always double checked by a nurse, the charge nurse, each order

written has to be noted by two people, a secretary and an RN, so it

made me feel better to know someone was checking on me. I never made

a mistake either, i just worked a bit slower than usual. For me I

always felt a little better at work, in fact I used to enjoy going

there because even though I was sick, it distracted me from my

symptoms for a little while at least, and I did 12 hour shifts too. I

guess we are all different and all have different jobs and abilities

when we are so ill. I had that brain fog and I remember one night(i

picked up a night shift) i was dizzy beyond normal dizzy, I mean I

had to go in the bathroom and get on my knees and pray to god to

please get me through that shift, he somehow did.

I had no choice though, had I been married I don't know if I would

have pushed myself so hard. I was very strange when i was ill with my

implants, there were some days I would get so angry I would get on my

bike and ride for 4 or 5 hours, like 50 miles, just out of anger at

doctors and implants and illness and everything, then the next day I

would pay by being in bed all day. I don't know I was pretty messed

up in my head. I just found that staying home all I did was cry and

focus on my problems, and being around people helped me so much.

maybe there is something else you could do, something not so hard or

stressful that would help you to get your mind off your health for a

little while? Is there anything like that? I would suggest volunteer

work but that won't help your finances any.

anyhow girl, it sounds like your old job was too much for ya in this

condition now, so I will pray you get your disability.

I hope that you will get to where soon, you will feel better and that

will help you get back to work. Our illness really does go away

eventually. I mean if everything was removed and your capsules are

out you should start healing, the pain will be the last thing to go

and sometimes I still get that achy beat up feeling when I push

myself. But after I get up and moving it gets better.

Anyhow if you need to see a shrink, try the suicidal threat, it will

get you in immediatly, that is what I did.

I know it is bad to say that, but shoot they should not make people

wait 6 freaking weeks, that is really bad! In fact I told the Dr that

I lied because I needed to see him and that while I was not really

going to kill myself I had been feeling pretty desperate, he was cool

about it too, he understood.

Sorry I don't have a better idea for ya.

please girl, try to hang in there, it does get better, it will, I

know it will and maybe since you had all that stuff leak into your

system it is just gonna be a longer road for you. I mean hell I was

sick enough and i did not have any leaking, I mean I only had the

things for 18 months, and that was enough to screw me up for a good 3

years!

we love you and care for you very much Shari, please get help if you

need it soon, ok?

PROMISE US?

-C

In , halvey70@a... wrote:

> thanks .

>

> Actually I have never even thought of filing bankruptcy before now-

I have

> always had a good job and so has my hubby. We had debt but never

made late

> payments, etc. I just don't know what to do now that I can't

work. If I tried to

> go back now I don't know how I could make it with all of the pain I

have and

> the brain fog - it is so terrible. My job was very demanding and

detail

> oriented and there is no way... Before I left I was making so many

mistakes and

> crying all the time. Hell, all I do is cry now. Been at it all

day - I tried

> to make an appt earlier w/ a psychiatrist and the soonest anyone

can see me is

> 6 weeks! What do people in crisis do? What a freakin nightmare. I

am getting

> shot down at every corner - if this disability crap would just come

through I

> could stop worrying so much and maybe focus on my health. oh well

>

> love shari

[Guest guest]

Shari I am very concerned about your situation. Please do try to get

into see someone. I wish I had some better answer for you, just know

that it does get better, most of us get well some just take longer

than others. Maybe you need to switch pain meds, get on something

that will help you more there, there are allot of things that can

still be tried ya know. I am really really worried about your mood,

and being so down, and I agree with your husband that you should go

to the ER if need be, however, I am not sure they will do much for

you there. Unfortunatly they are not that set up to deal with

emergent emotional issues, and we all know they don't know shit

(scuse me) about our illness or understand it at all.

there is medication though, and don't feel guilty if you have to take

it. Sure natural is great, but if you need help you need help. Don't

be afraid to try different things. Most likely time will heal you, in

the meantime if your in that much physical pain I would talk to your

pain Dr and see if they cannot switch you around, there are some meds

that work better than others, or at least get you something for

breakthrough pain.

please girl, don't hesitate to call me or write me either.

I am praying for you.

-

In , halvey70@a... wrote:

> thanks

>

> I am sorry I have been so negative - I just feel so bad lately and

can't get

> any help from the medical world as well as disability. I am so

worried about

> everything all of the time - your suggestion for getting an appt

wasn't too

> far off the mark really. I won't say that I haven't thought I

would be better

> off dead a time or two lately but I wouldn't be able to do that to

my young

> son. All of this is just so hard sometimes... I feel like I am

going crazy. my

> hubby mentioned taking me to the ER the other night when I was

soooo depressed

> and talking crazy. Maybe it isn't such a bad idea as I may be able

to get the

> medical/mental help I need and not have to keep waiting and being

turned away.

>

> thanks for your care and concern - you are a wonderful friend

>

> love

> shari