A bit depressed...

[Guest guest]

Well, after getting a bit of progress (Thursday Tom measured me at 94

degrees, up from the 86 I was stuck at), I had a bad OS visit today after a

bad PT on Tuesday where measured me at only 92.

OS is looking for AT LEAST 90 degrees *FREE* range of motion at this point,

and I just don't have it... free ROM I'm still hanging out in the 80's. I

have slightly more than 90 with massage and other work from PT, but no more.

He also wants to see more quad strength. I've admittedly been slacking a tad

on my leg lifts (just a tad) to focus on ROM, but PT's had been happy with

my strength and had also been focusing on ROM. OS says if I don't get some

significant improvement in ROM in the next few weeks, I'll have to have

another surgery to scope and/or manipulate the joint and get the scar tissue

broken loose.

Went to PT after that depressing OS visit, and Tom says we can't really get

more aggressive than we have been… it probably wouldn't damage the ACI graft

site or anything, but there's just a limit to how aggressive we can get. My

knee is having a hard lock right about 90 degrees, like a door stop on a

door. All the work I've been doing to try and bend it to that point and then

scooch it a bit more, is having no real effect. the aggressive PT is having

no real effect. I just don't know what else we can do. said that

they don't like to be negative, but her experience is telling her I'm going

to be in for the scope. Tom said it's not a bad thing, either, as soon as

the couple days' being sore would be over, I'd be at 130 ROM and back on

track.

So I'm not happy about today's visit, but at least I pretty much know what

I'm in for. I can expect to go through the hell of PT for another 2 or 3

weeks, busting my ass at home to increase strength and try to break down the

scar tissue, but I'll probably have to have that other surgery in a month or

so no matter what we do.

In good news though, I got to ditch the brace and one crutch today, I'm at

80% WB. Maybe I can get some good sleep tonight. :-) And I get to start

trying to drive a little bit at a time. I might be able to start going back

to the office in a week or two. Though of course another surgery would set

that back again.

::sigh:: Part of me is wondering why my OS is so insistent on trying to

break through this block with PT when it's such a hard lock, and both PT's

think it's too deep to break up with massage & mob's. If a little scope

would clear this right up and get me back on the PT track, what's the big

deal. 2 weeks ago, I said I'd rather avoid another surgery, but I'm going

through absolute hell in PT now, and it's not getting us anywhere. I come

home shaking and all but crying from every PT session, with no serious

improvement, and here my OS is implying that I'm not doing what I should at

home... I'm doing everything I'm being told for ROM and then some, and it's

just not working. Short of having my husband just grab a hold and wrench it

and rip up all the scar tissue, I frankly don't know what else I could be

doing.

I still know I did the right thing with this surgery, but it's really

depressing to hit this block and get nowhere for so long.

Thanks for listening, I just needed to get that whine out of my system. :-)

Meg.

--

The only way out is through.

(Knee post-op diary at http://www.thefisher.net)