Laugh of the day

[Guest guest]

A man was going up to bed, when his wife told him he'd left the light

on in the garden shed, she could see it from the bedroom window. But he

said that he hadn't been in the shed that day. He looked himself, and

there were people in the shed, stealing things.

He rang the police, but they told him that no-one was in his area, so

no-one was available to catch the thieves. He said, " OK, " hung up,

counted to 30 and rang the police again.

" Hello. I just rang you a few seconds ago because there were people in

my shed? Well, you don't have to worry about them now, I've just shot

them all. "

Within five minutes there were half a dozen police cars in the area,

an Armed Response unit, the works. Of course, they caught the burglars

red-handed.

One of the policemen said to this man: " I thought you said you'd shot

them! "

He replied: " I thought you said there was no-one available! "

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The Top 12 Signs Your Co-Worker Takes

Science Fiction WAY Too Seriously

12> His cell phone rings the theme from " Close Encounters. "

11> Constantly musing, " What would Vader do? "

10> Insists he's groping you because he's trying to perform a

" Vulcan slut meld. "

9> " Only two more auditing sessions and I'll finally be clear! "

8> Gave his children names even he cannot pronounce.

7> Always mutters something about probes and Uranus every time

you walk by. It damn well better be science fiction.

6> Can you really " set the fax machine on stun? " I don't

think so.

5> He's the only one jockeying to take off the Klingon holidays.

4> No longer able to engage in Kirk vs. Picard debates due to

restraining order.

3> Says, " He's Dead, Jim " when he cuts into the prime rib

at lunch.

2> Camps outside his cubicle 48 hours before the latest

" Star Wars " trailer is released online.

and Topfive.com's Number 1 Sign Your Co-Worker

Takes Science Fiction Way Too Seriously...

1> Enters elevator, strikes a pose, and yells " Energize! "

as the doors close.

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To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the

affection of children...to leave the world a better place...to know even one

life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.

--- Ralph Waldo Emerson