Leisure activities

[Guest guest]

All this talk about adulthood leisure and social interaction has

brought up a situation that has been on my mind for yrs with no answer.

My son is 13. He enjoys being out with other people. He

interacts at soccer, 4H and horseback riding. When people come over he

plays board games with them and interacts.

But at home he does nothing. Since he was a baby he never played by

himself. He will gladly play with someone, but alone he just sits and

looks out the window, wants to watch tv all the time (we don't allow

that) or just listen to the same cd over and over.(don't allow that

either.) No playing.If I ask him to set table, do dishes or play cards

etc he is fine with it. But to think up that on his own ..he can't?

Any advice?

Janet H

[Guest guest]

is almost 11. When she's at school, church, out and about, wherever,

she is appropriately social, chats people's ears off about her favorite topics,

and participates in a variety of activities with children and adults of all

abilities. She has a friend (non-ds) who invites her over for playdates

occasionally, but generally she is pretty busy with homework, swimming,

basketball, Scouts and family activities that I don't think she feels she's

deprived from more " typical " social interactions from girls her age.... she's

the kid who knows everyone at school, church, everywhere, and she feels that

everyone is her friend.... she even told us (and it was hard to keep a straight

face) that she was " so popular. " ... it was really cute!

However, at home, she has always liked to have what we've always thought of as

her personal time. She comes home from school and likes to read in her room (no

TV on school days, or THAT would be the #1 choice). When she has TV or computer

time, she likes to do that a LOT, and enjoys watching shows like SpongeBob and

Drake and Josh, that I know she's seen every episode many times. If you ask her

to do a chore or activity, she will join right in, and does play with her

dollhouse and play kitchen in her room solo (but these are only a few of the

many toys she has... most are ignored unless sisters/friends play too.) She

loves listening to music in her room.

Since she is quite social when out, and social in when she wants to at home

(either when she asks her sisters to play, or when invited to play), I chalk it

up to, she likes to do things that she's comfortable with and make her happy. I

don't see anything wrong with her sitting in her room, listing to the same 2

Disney karaoke CDs over and over.... heck, that's what her sisters do.... play

the songs the like over and over again on their ipods. I think she likes the

familiarity, and she's also learning the words.... just take more repetition!

Same with TV.... if she's seen that particular SpongeBob 10 times, she knows

exactly what's coming up (and will tell you... hey, this is where SpongeBob does

such and such).... she LIKES the repetition and familiarity.

I think all kids have different personalities, and our kids may not be able to

express that " hey, I'm happy chilling out in my room or in front of the TV " as

their siblings would be. As parents of kids with special needs, we are more

concerned about socialization (and have been since birth, LOL.) I think the

thread about adult interactions was very interesting.... parents who have spent

much time and effort on social skills, and still, their social, competenet kids

with DS make choices that may like " different " to us, but it sounds like they

are living happy, fufilled lives..... just doing things a bit differently (and

happily.) I loved that Jan thinks the other girl is too slow to walk with...

heck, most of us adults would just stay with our walking partner because it

wouldn't be nice to ditch them, but in reality, we'd rather walk alone than with

a super slow partner... who is happier.... Jan, walking alone at her best pace,

or someone else, complaining to their DH that they hate walking with so and so

because they are so slow?

OK, hopefully I haven't misread any of these threads.... using webmail at the

moment and I can't seem to get everything in order :-)

Hope everyone had a wonderful, safe Christmas.

, mom to (13), (10 DS), and Sammy (9)

---- jmhill46619 <jmhill46619@...> wrote:

> All this talk about adulthood leisure and social interaction has

> brought up a situation that has been on my mind for yrs with no answer.

>

> My son is 13. He enjoys being out with other people. He

> interacts at soccer, 4H and horseback riding. When people come over he

> plays board games with them and interacts.

>

> But at home he does nothing. Since he was a baby he never played by

> himself. He will gladly play with someone, but alone he just sits and

> looks out the window, wants to watch tv all the time (we don't allow

> that) or just listen to the same cd over and over.(don't allow that

> either.) No playing.If I ask him to set table, do dishes or play cards

> etc he is fine with it. But to think up that on his own ..he can't?

>

> Any advice?

>

> Janet H

>

>