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HI Dana:

How wonderful. What great news. I am so delighted for you and your

daughter. You have been a very positive and interesting participant on

this list and I will miss you but this is so fantastic and think of how

much hope you are giving the rest of us.

BTW, I am sure there are lists for parents of " high strung kids " . This is

a graduation that is very meaningful to us all, congratulations. Good

luck, aloha, Kathy (H)

kathyh@...

At 08:29 PM 5/27/99 -0400, you wrote:

>From: Dana Carvalho <clayvon@...>

>

>Hi everyone,

>I took my daughter to see Dr. March yesterday for an update on her

>diagnosis. When she was diagnosed 2 years ago I had taken her to him

>for a second opinion and he confirmed the OCD as well as transient tic

>disorder and anxiety NOS. He made lots of recommendations but he wasn't

>in our insurance network and so he didn't treat her. He said she could

>be in a study at that time but we decided not to risk her being in the

>placebo group - she needed the meds. The doctor who first diagnosed her

>continued to see her every 3-4 mo. for a med check but did nothing else,

>no CBT etc. I took her to Reid for CBT a few times for skin

>picking and that was successful.

>When I took her back yesterday I told Dr. March that I was not seeing

>any rituals as before but I didn't know if that's because they were gone

>or she was hiding them. And she had lots of tics. I was also concerned

>about her mood and anxiety level and demanding nature, all of which can

>be signs of depression in children.

>After a complete examination as before, he said this time that for all

>intents and purposes her OCD is gone. (!) It's kinda like wearing

>glassess - without them I'm vision impaired, with them I'm a lady

>w/glasses. He said with paxil she's a " normal " kid, albeit high strung,

>slightly anxious and very intense. This is also how I would describe

>me. He said yeah, she's got Tourette, so what? It isn't getting in her

>way, doesn't bother her, you don't have to fix it.

>He basically said that she was now okay enough that I could stop

>thinking of events in her life in terms of OCD and just " take her home

>and enjoy her and don't let her get away with anything because you're

>worried about OCD " . If he wasn't who he is, I probably wouldn't believe

>him. After reading his book I have to say I do trust his opinion.

>In a weird way it will be an adjustment not to worry and second guess

>(is this normal or ocd, should I make allowances or punish). Really, if

>anyone else had told me this I would not believe them. So, towards the

>goal of starting to live as if she is just a typical high strung kid,

>I'm going to unsubscribe and try to change my focus and see what

>unfolds.

>This list has been really helpful and if I need it I trust it will be

>helpful again. I'll wait a few days to unsubscribe in case anyone wants

>to respond, or feel free to email me privately.

>Thanks to everyone for being here.

>Dana in NC

>

>

>------------------------------------------------------------------------

>Having difficulty getting " in synch " with list members?

>

>Try ONElist's Shared Calendar to organize events, meetings and more!

>------------------------------------------------------------------------

>The is sponsored by the OCSDA. You may visit

their web site at http://www.ocdhelp.org/ and view schedules for chatroom

support at http://www.ocdhelp.org/chat.html

>

>

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Oh Dana, you will be missed! You have been so supportive

and informative. I have learned so much from you.

Take Care and God Bless!!

mary from La.

Dana Carvalho wrote:

> From: Dana Carvalho <clayvon@...>

>

> Hi everyone,

> I took my daughter to see Dr. March yesterday for an update on her

> diagnosis. When she was diagnosed 2 years ago I had taken her to him

> for a second opinion and he confirmed the OCD as well as transient tic

> disorder and anxiety NOS. He made lots of recommendations but he wasn't

> in our insurance network and so he didn't treat her. He said she could

> be in a study at that time but we decided not to risk her being in the

> placebo group - she needed the meds. The doctor who first diagnosed her

> continued to see her every 3-4 mo. for a med check but did nothing else,

> no CBT etc. I took her to Reid for CBT a few times for skin

> picking and that was successful.

> When I took her back yesterday I told Dr. March that I was not seeing

> any rituals as before but I didn't know if that's because they were gone

> or she was hiding them. And she had lots of tics. I was also concerned

> about her mood and anxiety level and demanding nature, all of which can

> be signs of depression in children.

> After a complete examination as before, he said this time that for all

> intents and purposes her OCD is gone. (!) It's kinda like wearing

> glassess - without them I'm vision impaired, with them I'm a lady

> w/glasses. He said with paxil she's a " normal " kid, albeit high strung,

> slightly anxious and very intense. This is also how I would describe

> me. He said yeah, she's got Tourette, so what? It isn't getting in her

> way, doesn't bother her, you don't have to fix it.

> He basically said that she was now okay enough that I could stop

> thinking of events in her life in terms of OCD and just " take her home

> and enjoy her and don't let her get away with anything because you're

> worried about OCD " . If he wasn't who he is, I probably wouldn't believe

> him. After reading his book I have to say I do trust his opinion.

> In a weird way it will be an adjustment not to worry and second guess

> (is this normal or ocd, should I make allowances or punish). Really, if

> anyone else had told me this I would not believe them. So, towards the

> goal of starting to live as if she is just a typical high strung kid,

> I'm going to unsubscribe and try to change my focus and see what

> unfolds.

> This list has been really helpful and if I need it I trust it will be

> helpful again. I'll wait a few days to unsubscribe in case anyone wants

> to respond, or feel free to email me privately.

> Thanks to everyone for being here.

> Dana in NC

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Having difficulty getting " in synch " with list members?

>

> Try ONElist's Shared Calendar to organize events, meetings and more!

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> The is sponsored by the OCSDA. You may visit their

web site at http://www.ocdhelp.org/ and view schedules for chatroom support at

http://www.ocdhelp.org/chat.html

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Dana, Thank you for all the help , I'm going to miss you, but I'm very happy

for you and your daughter. Love Beth

new direction

> From: Dana Carvalho <clayvon@...>

>

> Hi everyone,

> I took my daughter to see Dr. March yesterday for an update on her

> diagnosis. When she was diagnosed 2 years ago I had taken her to him

> for a second opinion and he confirmed the OCD as well as transient tic

> disorder and anxiety NOS. He made lots of recommendations but he wasn't

> in our insurance network and so he didn't treat her. He said she could

> be in a study at that time but we decided not to risk her being in the

> placebo group - she needed the meds. The doctor who first diagnosed her

> continued to see her every 3-4 mo. for a med check but did nothing else,

> no CBT etc. I took her to Reid for CBT a few times for skin

> picking and that was successful.

> When I took her back yesterday I told Dr. March that I was not seeing

> any rituals as before but I didn't know if that's because they were gone

> or she was hiding them. And she had lots of tics. I was also concerned

> about her mood and anxiety level and demanding nature, all of which can

> be signs of depression in children.

> After a complete examination as before, he said this time that for all

> intents and purposes her OCD is gone. (!) It's kinda like wearing

> glassess - without them I'm vision impaired, with them I'm a lady

> w/glasses. He said with paxil she's a " normal " kid, albeit high strung,

> slightly anxious and very intense. This is also how I would describe

> me. He said yeah, she's got Tourette, so what? It isn't getting in her

> way, doesn't bother her, you don't have to fix it.

> He basically said that she was now okay enough that I could stop

> thinking of events in her life in terms of OCD and just " take her home

> and enjoy her and don't let her get away with anything because you're

> worried about OCD " . If he wasn't who he is, I probably wouldn't believe

> him. After reading his book I have to say I do trust his opinion.

> In a weird way it will be an adjustment not to worry and second guess

> (is this normal or ocd, should I make allowances or punish). Really, if

> anyone else had told me this I would not believe them. So, towards the

> goal of starting to live as if she is just a typical high strung kid,

> I'm going to unsubscribe and try to change my focus and see what

> unfolds.

> This list has been really helpful and if I need it I trust it will be

> helpful again. I'll wait a few days to unsubscribe in case anyone wants

> to respond, or feel free to email me privately.

> Thanks to everyone for being here.

> Dana in NC

>

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Having difficulty getting " in synch " with list members?

>

> Try ONElist's Shared Calendar to organize events, meetings and more!

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> The is sponsored by the OCSDA. You may visit

their web site at http://www.ocdhelp.org/ and view schedules for chatroom

support at http://www.ocdhelp.org/chat.html

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Dana,

I will miss you. Thanks so much for all your insight and advice. It has

meant a great deal to me. How exciting to consider a life post-OCD. May we

all be so lucky!

Take care,

in S.D.

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Please unsubscribe me from this list.

Re: new direction

From: Roman <ChrisRoman@...>

Dana,

I will miss you. Thanks so much for all your insight and advice. It has

meant a great deal to me. How exciting to consider a life post-OCD. May

we

all be so lucky!

Take care,

in S.D.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Give back to your community through " Grow to Give. "

http://www.ONElist.com

See homepage for details.

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The is sponsored by the OCSDA. You may visit

their web site at http://www.ocdhelp.org/ and view schedules for

chatroom support at http://www.ocdhelp.org/chat.html

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Dana in NC,

I can't begin to express the pride I have in you and your family! What an

achievment to know that all your hard work has paid off.

Best wishes to you!

wendy in canada

P.S. If you get the opportunity to update me, I would like to hear how

things are going. Take care of #1!

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Dear Kathy and everyone who responded with such kind words and supportive

thoughts,

I will miss the support and commraderie of this list! I know in order to get in

the habit of not filtering everything thru the " is this ocd " filter I need to

not be so immersed in ocd info.

- but I will miss you guys. I could not have gotten thru the past few months

w/o your help. Please feel free to keep in touch through private email.

My husband is finally doing CBT for his ocd too so I think it's time for me to

unsubscribe from the OCD-L too. I need to trust that my husband can address his

ocd issues w/o my involvement,

my daughter is " well enough " to cope with life with normal parenting as opposed

to the vigilent ocd parenting I had to do. Now I will focus on me for awhile;

take stock of my own anxiety

level and figure out if I made it thru all of this intact or if I may have

gotten depressed myself and need some help.

One last story: Last night we went out to dinner at a restaurant we had been

wanting to try for awhile. My husband was stressed (and probably obssessing a

bit) because we had to take a

different route due to holiday traffic, Ava was distressed because I picked her

up from swim team practice with a dress and shoes to change into but forgot a

brush so her hair wasn't " right " ,

I was nervous because of holiday traffic and because everyone else was a bit on

edge. My husband stopped at a convienience store to buy Ava a brush (he's a

softie). As we drove off Ava said

" now my hairs ok but I wish you had brought a different dress for me " . At that

point I said " you know, every one of us in this car has some problems with

anxiety - Clay has a panicky

feeling because we're driving in the wrong direction and even though he knows

it's only a short detour it doesn't " feel " right, I'm nervous about holiday

traffic and everyone else's state of

mind/happiness, and you're over the hair worry and looking for something else to

worry about. How about we all take a deep breath and decide to be okay with

things not being perfect and

accept the anxiety that generates for all of us - we don't have to fix it, we

can just live with it and decide to enjoy tonight anyway. "

We all started laughing and went on to have a really nice time. Dr. Grayson, a

consultant on the OCD-L says that the goal of OCD treatment is learning to live

with uncertainty and

imperfection. I think we're on our way.

Again, thanks for being here. I know where I can come if I need to. I wish you

all well. Write if you want to keep in touch.

Dana in NC

Kathy Hammes wrote:

> From: Kathy Hammes <kathyh@...>

>

> HI Dana:

>

> How wonderful. What great news. I am so delighted for you and your

> daughter. You have been a very positive and interesting participant on

> this list and I will miss you but this is so fantastic and think of how

> much hope you are giving the rest of us.

>

> BTW, I am sure there are lists for parents of " high strung kids " . This is

> a graduation that is very meaningful to us all, congratulations. Good

> luck, aloha, Kathy (H)

> kathyh@...

>

> At 08:29 PM 5/27/99 -0400, you wrote:

> >From: Dana Carvalho <clayvon@...>

> >

> >Hi everyone,

> >I took my daughter to see Dr. March yesterday for an update on her

> >diagnosis. When she was diagnosed 2 years ago I had taken her to him

> >for a second opinion and he confirmed the OCD as well as transient tic

> >disorder and anxiety NOS. He made lots of recommendations but he wasn't

> >in our insurance network and so he didn't treat her. He said she could

> >be in a study at that time but we decided not to risk her being in the

> >placebo group - she needed the meds. The doctor who first diagnosed her

> >continued to see her every 3-4 mo. for a med check but did nothing else,

> >no CBT etc. I took her to Reid for CBT a few times for skin

> >picking and that was successful.

> >When I took her back yesterday I told Dr. March that I was not seeing

> >any rituals as before but I didn't know if that's because they were gone

> >or she was hiding them. And she had lots of tics. I was also concerned

> >about her mood and anxiety level and demanding nature, all of which can

> >be signs of depression in children.

> >After a complete examination as before, he said this time that for all

> >intents and purposes her OCD is gone. (!) It's kinda like wearing

> >glassess - without them I'm vision impaired, with them I'm a lady

> >w/glasses. He said with paxil she's a " normal " kid, albeit high strung,

> >slightly anxious and very intense. This is also how I would describe

> >me. He said yeah, she's got Tourette, so what? It isn't getting in her

> >way, doesn't bother her, you don't have to fix it.

> >He basically said that she was now okay enough that I could stop

> >thinking of events in her life in terms of OCD and just " take her home

> >and enjoy her and don't let her get away with anything because you're

> >worried about OCD " . If he wasn't who he is, I probably wouldn't believe

> >him. After reading his book I have to say I do trust his opinion.

> >In a weird way it will be an adjustment not to worry and second guess

> >(is this normal or ocd, should I make allowances or punish). Really, if

> >anyone else had told me this I would not believe them. So, towards the

> >goal of starting to live as if she is just a typical high strung kid,

> >I'm going to unsubscribe and try to change my focus and see what

> >unfolds.

> >This list has been really helpful and if I need it I trust it will be

> >helpful again. I'll wait a few days to unsubscribe in case anyone wants

> >to respond, or feel free to email me privately.

> >Thanks to everyone for being here.

> >Dana in NC

> >

> >

> >------------------------------------------------------------------------

> >Having difficulty getting " in synch " with list members?

> >

> >Try ONElist's Shared Calendar to organize events, meetings and more!

> >------------------------------------------------------------------------

> >The is sponsored by the OCSDA. You may visit

> their web site at http://www.ocdhelp.org/ and view schedules for chatroom

> support at http://www.ocdhelp.org/chat.html

> >

> >

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Having difficulty getting " in synch " with list members?

>

> Try ONElist's Shared Calendar to organize events, meetings and more!

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> The is sponsored by the OCSDA. You may visit their

web site at http://www.ocdhelp.org/ and view schedules for chatroom support at

http://www.ocdhelp.org/chat.html

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