Guest guest Posted February 26, 2000 Report Share Posted February 26, 2000 Dear list, first of all, thanks to everyone who was so supportive and enthusiastic when I posted earlier about Kellen handling her tough Monday so well. After that wonderful Monday though, the last half of this week has been awful for her, she's experiencing much worse symptoms, a lot of new symptoms, is consumed all day doing compulsions and is pretty much miserable. Weirdly she's maintaining her clothing gains, in the past the clothing problems would suddenly worsen along with the other OCD symptoms. Do other kids experience *gradual* waxing and waning of symptoms? Kel's worsenings have all been abrupt and overnight, similar to her initial onset. I called her doctor Friday, last month during her appointment he encouraged me to have her blood drawn during worsenings, maybe we'll do this. Kel will be thrilled. :-( It's so hard when they're doing well and suddenly they aren't, as I know you all know. Right now I'm wondering if I'll ever get used to this. If I feel this jerked around, how much worse it must be for the kids. Kathy R. in Indiana, feeling very sad and sorry for herself Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 26, 2000 Report Share Posted February 26, 2000 Dear Kathy, I have had the same thing happen with my son. I'm still trying to find that middle ground where I don't get so excited about the new accomplishments or so horribly down about the setbacks. I've found that when he does make a major step forward, he usually retreats or has some kind of setback afterward. It is almost like he goes too far and is on unknown turf and gets scared. The good news is that this usually signifies that he is on a new plateau for his comfort level. I think of it as a giant step forward with a few small steps back but still gaining ground. Good luck. Noelle in NY Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 26, 2000 Report Share Posted February 26, 2000 Hi Kathy: Please keep up the bragging and the celebrating when things go well. That is the cruelty of OCD the way it waxes and wanes. It really tests our patience and must be so frustrating for our beloved OCDers. What I find is that Steve's OCD waxes so seldom without him taking effective corrective action that I have become less adept at responding appropriately to the flareups. Then I feel extra down that I know better how to help him and shouldn't be doing things that make it worse! It seems to me that OCD symptoms can wax for no good or noticeable reason. You have lots to celebrate with the clothing gains sticking, just reminding Kel of this major success will surely inspire her and encourage her with fighting the new symptoms. When Steve has some slippage we talk about what he can do to boss it back. If it is a bad flareup it can take a day or two before he gets things back in check, and he is very insistent at doing his own thing. I guess there is some advantage to teenagerhood after all. Our usual panacea is taking Steve for a walk or a hike; this may not start out fun but after a while he is usually doing much better. Good luck, take care, aloha, Kathy (H) kathyh@... At 09:44 AM 02/26/2000 -0500, you wrote: >From: " Kathy " <klr@...> > >Dear list, first of all, thanks to everyone who was so supportive and >enthusiastic when I posted earlier about Kellen handling her tough Monday so >well. After that wonderful Monday though, the last half of this week has >been awful for her, she's experiencing much worse symptoms, a lot of new >symptoms, is consumed all day doing compulsions and is pretty much >miserable. Weirdly she's maintaining her clothing gains, in the past the >clothing problems would suddenly worsen along with the other OCD symptoms. > >Do other kids experience *gradual* waxing and waning of symptoms? Kel's >worsenings have all been abrupt and overnight, similar to her initial onset. >I called her doctor Friday, last month during her appointment he encouraged >me to have her blood drawn during worsenings, maybe we'll do this. Kel will >be thrilled. :-( > >It's so hard when they're doing well and suddenly they aren't, as I know you >all know. Right now I'm wondering if I'll ever get used to this. If I feel >this jerked around, how much worse it must be for the kids. > >Kathy R. in Indiana, feeling very sad and sorry for herself Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 27, 2000 Report Share Posted February 27, 2000 Hi Kathy R., Oh it's a roller coaster ride, isn't it? One day you're elated about all the stuff they can do, the next day OCD socks you right between the eyes. This is one of the most difficult aspects of the disorder for me. I'm working with my therapist right now on staying more detached about andra's waxing and waning. This is a biggie for me, as I was raised in the overprotective style and tend toward parenting that way myself. As you know, this too shall pass. It's just hanging in there waiting that's the hard part. But Kel's a strong girl and she'll make it through, with your help and support. Take it easy on yourself and take good care of you. You are in my thoughts, Lesli Kathy wrote: > > From: " Kathy " <klr@...> > > Dear list, first of all, thanks to everyone who was so supportive and > enthusiastic when I posted earlier about Kellen handling her tough Monday so > well. After that wonderful Monday though, the last half of this week has > been awful for her, she's experiencing much worse symptoms, a lot of new > symptoms, is consumed all day doing compulsions and is pretty much > miserable. Weirdly she's maintaining her clothing gains, in the past the > clothing problems would suddenly worsen along with the other OCD symptoms. > > Do other kids experience *gradual* waxing and waning of symptoms? Kel's > worsenings have all been abrupt and overnight, similar to her initial onset. > I called her doctor Friday, last month during her appointment he encouraged > me to have her blood drawn during worsenings, maybe we'll do this. Kel will > be thrilled. :-( > > It's so hard when they're doing well and suddenly they aren't, as I know you > all know. Right now I'm wondering if I'll ever get used to this. If I feel > this jerked around, how much worse it must be for the kids. > > Kathy R. in Indiana, feeling very sad and sorry for herself > > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > Shop the web for great deals. Save on Computers, > electronics, Home furnishings and more. > 1/1559/2/_/531051/_/951576352/ > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > > You may subscribe to the OCD-L by emailing > listserv@... . > In the body of your message write: > subscribe OCD-L your name. > The Archives and Links List for the OCD and > Parenting List may be accessed by going to > / . > Enter your email address and password. > Click on the highlighted list name and then click on index or links. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 27, 2000 Report Share Posted February 27, 2000 Hi Lesli, the worse-then-better nature of OCD is the hardest part of living around the disorder for me too. And so many things about OCD are illogical, I'm no Mr. Spock but I'm much happier when things in my life make sense (Jim??? ;-) This is the third time in a year that Kel was suddenly much worse and this time she thinks it's punishment for going against OCD's rules, all the bossing back caused this. Maybe it did, I don't know. More likely, it just happened. AAAARGH! It's hard to stay detached when a kid is OCDing all over you! I've never managed to actually feel detached from Kel's problems but since last winter I've acted detached for all I'm worth. Younger OCDers at least seem to take a lot of cues from Mom and it really is helpful to her for me to be calm and matter-of-fact. Is a goal in your counseling that you will actually *feel* and *be* less effected by andra's waxing OCD? How is this going? Thanks Lesli for your support, Kathy R. in Indiana > From: Masoud & Lesli Molaei <desk@...> > > Hi Kathy R., > > Oh it's a roller coaster ride, isn't it? One day you're elated about > all the stuff they can do, the next day OCD socks you right between the > eyes. > > This is one of the most difficult aspects of the disorder for me. I'm > working with my therapist right now on staying more detached about > andra's waxing and waning. This is a biggie for me, as I was raised > in the overprotective style and tend toward parenting that way myself. > > As you know, this too shall pass. It's just hanging in there waiting > that's the hard part. But Kel's a strong girl and she'll make it > through, with your help and support. > > Take it easy on yourself and take good care of you. You are in my > thoughts, > Lesli Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 27, 2000 Report Share Posted February 27, 2000 Hi Noelle, I have noticed this dance too but usually only in hindsight. I don't know why I have so much trouble maintaining perspective during a sudden worsening, though I'm doing better I think with the smaller-scale downturns. Thanks, Kathy R. in Indiana > From: larkspurmr@... > > Dear Kathy, > snip< > I've found that when he does make a > major step forward, he usually retreats or has some kind of setback > afterward. It is almost like he goes too far and is on unknown turf and gets > scared. The good news is that this usually signifies that he is on a new > plateau for his comfort level. I think of it as a giant step forward with a > few small steps back but still gaining ground. > Good luck. > Noelle in NY Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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