Re: Spousal issue

[Guest guest]

Penny,

I'm sorry to hear about your friend's marriage breaking up. No one

should have to deal with two catastrophic events at once. That is not

part of the deal, usually; although all relationships go through a

definite change with a cancer diagnosis. Six years ago I was

diagnosed with lymphoma (prior to having CML) and it was after my

health had returned along with my hair and I had lost 40 pounds and

got in shape that I realized my marriage was not in good shape. Our

marriage hung in there until we had the strength to deal with some

major falling out. My husband was emotionally absent I was very

depressed and simply trying to get through. Anyway, the moral of

story is that we worked through it and both decided that it was worth

saving. When you survive something like cancer your face a whole new

way of examining everything to be sure you are doing the best you can

to be happy. What he did was absolutely selfish, no doubt about it.

There are no two sides in this one. Sounds like he never quite made

it past puberty. I think in the end she will find happiness from a

more generous soul. I wish her all the best.

>

> Hi Penny,

>

> It does happen. In most cases it is just an excuse to get out of the

> marriage. A pretty callous step to take at this point in time.

>

> Give her your love and understanding. Take her out to a movie,

coffee, etc.

>

> Zavie

>

> Zavie (age 70)

> 67 Shoreham Avenue

> Ottawa, Canada, K2G 3X3

> dxd AUG/99

> INF OCT/99 to FEB/00, CHF

> No meds FEB/00 to JAN/01

> Gleevec since MAR/27/01 (400 mg)

> CCR SEP/01. #102 in Zero Club

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> ID: zaviem

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> Skype: Zavie

>

> _____

>

> From: [mailto: ] On Behalf

Of Lusty

> Sent: October 25, 2008 1:15 PM

>

> Subject: [ ] Spousal issue

>

> Hello,

> I have a friend who was diagnosed with cancer last year. She has

> fought a brave fight and is winning. Earlier this week her husband

of

> 20 years told her he was leaving her. Said he couldn't handle the

> responsibility. Has anyone else had this happen to them and is it a

> common occurance? I feel so sorry for her, she seems absolutely

> terrified and lost. I don't know what to say to her.

>

> Any input would be appreciated. Thanks.

>

> Lusty

>

>

>

>