Guest guest Posted July 29, 2002 Report Share Posted July 29, 2002 k all..as usuall i got a good joke from my stepmom and just had to send it out...hope you all like it... brenda mom of tucker CAKE OR BED??? WHICH WOULD U CHOOSE? CAKE OR BED?????A HUSBAND IS AT HOME WATCHING A FOOTBALL GAME WHEN HIS WIFEINTERRUPTS. "HONEY, COULD YOU FIX THE LIGHT IN THE HALLWAY? IT'S BEEN FLICKERINGFOR WEEKS NOW." HE LOOKS AT HER AND SAYS ANGRILY; "FIX THE LIGHT, NOW?DOES IT LOOK LIKE I HAVE A G.E. LOGO PRINTED ON MY FOREHEAD? I DON'T THINKSO." THE WIFE ASKS, "WELL THEN, COULD YOU FIX THE FRIDGE DOOR? IT WON'TCLOSE RIGHT. " TO WHICH HE REPLIED, "FIX THE FRIDGE DOOR? DOES IT LOOK LIKEI HAVE WESTINGHOUSE WRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD? I DON'T THINK SO." "FINE", SHE SAYS "THEN YOU COULD AT LEAST FIX THE STEPS TO THE FRONT DOOR? THEY'RE ABOUT TO BREAK." "I'M NOT A DAMN CARPENTER AND I DON'TWANT TO FIX STEPS", HE SAYS. "DOES IT LOOK LIKE I HAVE ACE HARDWARE WRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD? I DON'T THINK SO. I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOU. I'M GOING TO THE BAR!!!"SO HE GOES TO THE BAR AND DRINKS FOR A COUPLE OF HOURS. HE STARTS TO FEELGUILTY ABOUT HOW HE TREATED HIS WIFE, AND DECIDES TO GO HOME AND HELP OUT. AS HE WALKS INTO THE HOUSE HE NOTICES THE STEPS ARE ALREADY FIXED. AS HE ENTERS THE HOUSE, HE SEES THE HALL LIGHT IS WORKING. AS HE GOES TO GET A BEER, HE NOTICES THE FRIDGE DOOR IS FIXED. "HONEY", HE ASKS,"HOW'D ALL THIS GET FIXED?" SHE SAID, "WELL, WHEN YOU LEFT I SAT OUTSIDE AND CRIED. JUST THEN ANICE YOUNG MAN ASKED ME WHAT WAS WRONG, AND I TOLD HIM. HE OFFERED TO DO ALL THE REPAIRS, AND ALL I HAD TO DO WAS EITHER GO TO BED WITH HIM OR BAKE A CAKE." HE SAID, "SO WHAT KIND OF CAKE DID YOU BAKE HIM?" SHE REPLIED, "HELLOOOOO.......DO YOU SEE BETTY CROCKER WRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD? I DON'T THINK SO!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 29, 2002 Report Share Posted July 29, 2002 ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!!! RFLMAO! Hillarious! Marci Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 21, 2004 Report Share Posted February 21, 2004 GOOD JOKE Why do men pee standing up? God was just about done creating man, but he had two things left over in his bag and He couldn't quite decide how to split them between Adam and Eve. He thought He might just as well ask them. He told them one of the things He had left was a thing that would allow the owner to pee while standing up. " It's a very handy thing, " God told them, " and I was wondering if either one of you had a preference for it. " Well, Adam jumped up and down and begged, " Oh, please give that to me! I'd love to be able to do that! It seems like just the sort of thing a man should have. Please! Pleeease! Give it to me! " On and on he went like an excited little boy. Eve just smiled and told God that if Adam really wanted it so badly, he could have it. So God gave Adam the thing that allowed him to pee standing up. Adam was so excited he just started whizzing all over the place - first on the side of a rock, then he wrote his name in the sand, and then he tried to see if he could hit a stump ten feet away - laughing with delight all the while. God and Eve watched him with amusement and then God said to Eve, " Well, I guess you're kind of stuck with the last thing I have left. " What's it called? " asked Eve. " Brains " , said God Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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