Re: (unknown)-Cindy

[Guest guest]

Dear ,

There is no reason for apologizing here. And you are

correct the group here is great. Always helpful and

willing to help you. There are days with all of them

I have no clue what I would do.

And yes I think we all sit in denial. It is easier at

times. My doctor said RA to me and I didn't believe

him. Until the meds I was on ran out. And I could

tell others this was really bothering me today, but it

is like on just anything for Sher to complain about.

My true friends understand, the people here understand

and I need to understand myself. Some days we can

only take one hour at a time.

Just know you aren't along here and love and prayers

from this group are real and right from the heart.

Always, Sheri

--- ekencindy <Ekencindy1@...> wrote:

> Hi Everyone,

>

> I am writing to tell you all a story of mine and

> maybe one of you can

> relate to this. For the last 6 years, I have been in

> and out of

> doctors offices and the diagnosis's were

> astonishing. One was too

> much time on my own with my then two children. That

> doctor got

> a " nice letter " from me. The next was Lyme and the

> next was Lyme.

> So

> I was treated for Lyme, and quite a few months on

> the AntiBiotic IV.

> Still no relief from pain and I was told that Lyme

> could be residual

> and to expect pain in the joints for the rest of

> life especially with

> the changing weather. Well a few years had past with

> slight or no

> pain and I sort of forgot about everything. When my

> daughter who is

> now 3 ½ was born, came another auto-immune disease,

> Hyperthyroid

> which was great at the time for me. I lost 45 lb.

> when she was 4

> weeks old, had all the energy that was humanly

> possible and life was

> grand until I found out that this was a Thyroid

> problem, but was told

> that this could go all away within 6 months. And it

> did!

>

> In December, 2001 I took a fall on the ice which put

> my neck in spasm

> and brought me into the ER. I went home with Vioxx

> and took a few

> days to get my neck back again. Then one morning it

> hit, all over

> again, the pain in my knees, and almost every joint

> in body was

> screaming in pain. For days, I was in bed and then

> finally made an

> appointment with my regular doctor. She said it was

> Fibromyalgia and

> gave me some antidepressants and said this should

> work. Two more

> doctors and then finally a Rheumatoligist. The

> Rheumatoligist first

> said I had PA and then the sed rate came back and he

> confirmed RA.

> Well after a year on Medrall and MTX, I felt better.

> I felt so good,

> that I spoke to my Rheumy and I told him I did not

> want to be on the

> Prednisone any more. He said I had to be in case I

> flared again and

> this would keep me out of a flare. Well my denial

> kicked in full

> force and I weaned myself off the drugs ( I read

> almost every article

> on the Internet how to wean off this stuff) and I

> did. Then I sold

> my home, bought another last summer and you know all

> the work

> involved with moving and three young kids. I put

> myself off for

> awhile and took care of the kids, the house and

> everything else, but

> me. I said to myself, there is nothing at all wrong

> with me. Yes,

> sometimes I feel pain in my joints, yes, sometimes

> my knees won't

> go

> up the stairs, without some pain, but hey, I did a

> lot of damage to

> my knees with a ski accident and even a car accident

> when I was

> younger. That is that pain and I do not have

> anything else wrong with

> me. I stopped seeing my Doctors, because I was tired

> of all the

> different diagnosis's and I was tired of taking

> those potent toxic

> meds. There was nothing wrong me. Boy was I wrong

> and everyday I

> learn more and more about this dreadful disease.

>

> The pain started coming back, nothing too much, but

> it was there. I

> made an appointment with another Rheumatoligist and

> he did feet and

> hand X-rays, did a ton of blood work and spent

> awhile with me

> talking. By the time I left there, I was confirmed

> again with a

> second diagnosis of RA. He said this disease plays

> it games like this

> and makes it hard for your family and friends to

> believe and it is

> even harder sometimes for you to believe. It hit me

> harder this time

> then the first diagnosis because I felt the first

> doctor could be

> wrong. I always had that denial, but after looking

> at my X-rays and

> hearing the words from the second doctor, I do

> finally believe that

> this is what I have. This is good and bad, good so I

> will take care

> of myself now and bad because, well you know why.

> It is funny on how denial can be so bad for people

> and I have learned

> another great life lesson.

>

> I am writing to you all and apologizing. I am

> apologizing for

> doubting this disease and not fully accepting the

> fact that there

> really is a disease that can do what it is doing. I

> wrote to the

> board a few times, but nothing that could help

> others. I hope this

> letter touched at least one person. I want to give

> back what I have

> received from you all. I am on the road to fully

> accepting and now

> concentrating on myself, because my family does need

> me in good

> working order and I need myself to get better.

>

> Thank you all for allowing me to grow with all of

> your words that you

> put out here on this great message board.

>

> Your Truly,

> from NY

>

>

>

>

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