To Gabi's Mom

[Guest guest]

Dear Gabi's Mom,

Welcome to our group. We are so glad you found us. Of course you are

heartbroken about Gabi having OCD. When our children are born, we have such

hopes and dreams about how they will be - not once do we hope that they will

have neurobiological disorders.

My name is Gail and I have a daughter, , who is 12 and has OCD. She

was diagnosed 3 years ago. I felt such guilt, sadness and depression when

she was first diagnosed. I kept questioning whether there was something I

had done to " make " her have OCD. Of course, I now understand that it is no

one's " fault. " OCD is a neurobiological disorder that has a real phsycial

component to it in that the brain does not function as it should. There are

variety of forms OCD can take, including your daughter's " just so " behavior.

All involve some form of extreme anxiety. The two most effective treatments

are using SSRI anti-depressents drugs and a form of therapy called Exposure

and Response Prevention. They are VERY effective, even in children as young

as Gabi.

OCD plays havic with the entire family's health and functioning as the

family struggles to make sense of and join in the treatment of OCD. Usually,

with children, treatment closely involves the whole family.

Just telling Gabi to stop the behavior, without a treatment plan, would

not be helpful at this time, as it would probably make her more anxious and

even escalate her symptons. Since your appointment with the dr. is so close,

I'd muddle through the next few days the best way you can and set just

getting to Tuesday's appt as your goal. I would also recommend that you talk

with Gabi about how she is feeling - most kids with OCD are aware that they

feel and act differently than others and so they try to hide the symptons.

Knowing you are aware of these differences AND still love her and want to

help her will give her the courage to try therapy.

My daughter has done relatively well. OCD tends to wax and wane, so there

are still times she has obvious distress. But we have never dropped to the

extreme bottom where she first began.

This list is here for you to ask questions, seek advice, vent, gain

support and even celebrate victories. There is a wealth of information among

the members! I have found not only support and guidance, but warm

friendships and even humor in this group. One thing we all stress is that

you have to take care of yourself - without you, Gabi would only be worse

off. Please write us again when you can.

Gail in N'Awlins