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RE: Advice taken

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Hi ,

Thanks for sharing how well that went. Hopefully I'll be putting the advice

to the test soon, too! :-)

Hugs,

Carol in FL

[ ] Advice taken

I just wanted to let you know that I did use some of the advice given about

intimacy. My " special friend " came over yesterday and we tried some of the

info that I read from several of you. First of all, we made arrangements

ahead of time. I made sure to take my meds at the proper time so that they

would be at their peak. I also took a nice hot shower right before he

arrived. This helped tremendously. We have always had an extremely open

conversational relationship, but we took the time to listen to each other a

little more seriously this time. We tried many things and if it didn't work

or caused pain for either him or myself, we voiced the problem and tried

something else. I also learned a valuable lesson. Don't jump to

conclusions. Talk about concerns. I found out that my feelings of

rejection

were unfounded. He was concerned about me and did not want to hurt me, so

he

waited for me to make the move. I was feeling insecure because of my weight

gain and joint pain and restrictions and (frankly) was a little embarrassed

of the whole situation. This made me uncomfortable to make my feelings

known

and when we were intimate and I really couldn't enjoy it. Yesterday,

however, many of the insecurities that I had were dealt with in a positive

way. We both have a much better understanding of each other and our limits.

I know that I can voice my concerns and will not be laughed at. I also know

that my weight gain does not bother him. He cares about me and wants to

feel

close to me no matter what the scale says. Needless to say, I had an

extremely enjoyable day yesterday. So please everyone, don't assume that

you know how the other person feels. Talk to them. Ask questions. Try new

things. You won't be sorry. I promise.

Stacey in PA

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