Re: Repetitive Questions

[Guest guest]

Oh my goodness, we live on my daughter's daily "scripts." In order not to get annoyed, just remember that your son can't control this, his repetitiveness isn't intentional. Have you spoken to any therapists? Having a lot of structured time helps.

In a message dated 7/14/2010 4:21:10 P.M. Central Daylight Time, cowie65@... writes:

Our son is 8 years old and diagnosed PDD-NOS. He always asks the same questions at different times of the day. Then he will ask several questions about something I have said. Many of the questions are the same words every time and then when my voice gets the annoyed sound he will change the wording around to ask the same thing. How do I handle this to not get so aggrevated and lower his anxiety about things?andrea

[Guest guest]

ABA would definitely help. Has he seen a psychologist or psychiatrist who works with kids on the spectrum? Biomed could help, too, there are definite connections between some medical conditions and OCD, for instance. And getting into your "zen" zone while you're answering or repeating the same things 100 times a day:)

In a message dated 7/14/2010 7:47:58 P.M. Central Daylight Time, cowie65@... writes:

therapists? what type?>> Oh my goodness, we live on my daughter's daily "scripts." In order not to > get annoyed, just remember that your son can't control this, his > repetitiveness isn't intentional. Have you spoken to any therapists? Having a lot > of structured time helps. > > > In a message dated 7/14/2010 4:21:10 P.M. Central Daylight Time, > cowie65@... writes:> > > > > Our son is 8 years old and diagnosed PDD-NOS. He always asks the same > questions at different times of the day. Then he will ask several questions > about something I have said. Many of the questions are the same words every > time and then when my voice gets the annoyed sound he will change the wording > around to ask the same thing. How do I handle this to not get so aggrevated > and lower his anxiety about things?> > andrea>

[Guest guest]

I believe "the questions" are a way of having a conversation about something and that, for some reason due to the way their brain works, are the only words they can get to come out. I have handled the "same question over and over" a variety of ways. Sometimes just a short answer, with the same words I've always used, sometimes asking him, "what do you think?" and then asking an additional question or expounding on it based on his response. (Also, I think it's important to remember how many questions our children are asked in the course of their day... they probably have "learned" that that's how to start a conversation with others!!! We need to change the way we talk to and teach our children -- less questions, more comments!)

One of the best ways that I've found to answer ongoing questioning of the same thing is to write a social story about it (name the story the exact question, if you want) and pull it out ("lets's read about it together") every time so that their is literacy and visual and consistency to go along with the response. May as well use it as an opportunity to teach while you have their attention, I always say! Depending on the question, you might even get library books to help expand on the answer.

I try to remind myself that my son has very minimal social skills and that this might be an opportunity to teach him how to carry a conversation, or even change a topic. I believe it's okay to tell him, sometimes, that I don't want to talk about that right now, and then try to change the topic to something more interesting to both of us. That is a life skill that EVERYONE should be able to handle and cope with!!

From: C6885@...Date: Wed, 14 Jul 2010 18:21:10 -0400Subject: Re: [ ] Repetitive Questions

Oh my goodness, we live on my daughter's daily "scripts." In order not to get annoyed, just remember that your son can't control this, his repetitiveness isn't intentional. Have you spoken to any therapists? Having a lot of structured time helps.

In a message dated 7/14/2010 4:21:10 P.M. Central Daylight Time, cowie65hotmail writes:

Our son is 8 years old and diagnosed PDD-NOS. He always asks the same questions at different times of the day. Then he will ask several questions about something I have said. Many of the questions are the same words every time and then when my voice gets the annoyed sound he will change the wording around to ask the same thing. How do I handle this to not get so aggrevated and lower his anxiety about things?andrea

The New Busy think 9 to 5 is a cute idea. Combine multiple calendars with Hotmail. Get busy.

[Guest guest]

Come to think of it, ABA might be a little overkill for a child on the mild side of the spectrum. I wonder what the other moms (and dads) out there think. But I think that the other suggestions could be helpful.

In a message dated 7/14/2010 9:41:55 P.M. Central Daylight Time, C6885@... writes:

ABA would definitely help. Has he seen a psychologist or psychiatrist who works with kids on the spectrum? Biomed could help, too, there are definite connections between some medical conditions and OCD, for instance. And getting into your "zen" zone while you're answering or repeating the same things 100 times a day:)

In a message dated 7/14/2010 7:47:58 P.M. Central Daylight Time, cowie65hotmail writes:

therapists? what type?>> Oh my goodness, we live on my daughter's daily "scripts." In order not to > get annoyed, just remember that your son can't control this, his > repetitiveness isn't intentional. Have you spoken to any therapists? Having a lot > of structured time helps. > > > In a message dated 7/14/2010 4:21:10 P.M. Central Daylight Time, > cowie65@... writes:> > > > > Our son is 8 years old and diagnosed PDD-NOS. He always asks the same > questions at different times of the day. Then he will ask several questions > about something I have said. Many of the questions are the same words every > time and then when my voice gets the annoyed sound he will change the wording > around to ask the same thing. How do I handle this to not get so aggrevated > and lower his anxiety about things?> > andrea>

[Guest guest]

therapists? what type?

>

> Oh my goodness, we live on my daughter's daily " scripts. " In order not to

> get annoyed, just remember that your son can't control this, his

> repetitiveness isn't intentional. Have you spoken to any therapists? Having

a lot

> of structured time helps.

>

>

> In a message dated 7/14/2010 4:21:10 P.M. Central Daylight Time,

> cowie65@... writes:

>

>

>

>

> Our son is 8 years old and diagnosed PDD-NOS. He always asks the same

> questions at different times of the day. Then he will ask several questions

> about something I have said. Many of the questions are the same words every

> time and then when my voice gets the annoyed sound he will change the wording

> around to ask the same thing. How do I handle this to not get so aggrevated

> and lower his anxiety about things?

>

> andrea

>

[Guest guest]

ABA is never overkill  :-)  It's the most flexible intervention out there.  After all, ABA is what you use when you give your partner a hug after he's taken out the trash for you or she's made your favorite dessert for you.  (Positive reinforcement.)

As for the scripting, this is very likely serving the purpose of lowering his anxiety -- not particularly getting the " right " answers but having the routine steady.  It could also be an attempt at starting a conversation in a child who doesn't have quite enough tools for this but does have the desire.

Some parents will report that various dietary interventions decrease the scripting, and for those kids, it's probably because the anxiety is resolved as the body's healed and balanced.  You may find that epsom salt baths or baths with lavendar oil, or massage (just hands, just back, just feet -- doesn't have to be major) also ease the anxiety.

As for the conversation attempts, when he asks you a question, answer once.  When he repeats it, tell him, " you already asked me that.  Ask me something else. "  Then prompt him with something related to but different from the usual question.  So if his standard question is " Will we have dinner soon? " , you can say, " You already asked me that.  Ask me something different, like, 'What are you making?' "

At a different regularly-scheduled questioning time (so as not to confuse him), you can also work on statements.  E.g., He asks you at lunch time, " Will we have lunch soon? "  You answer him once, and then the 2nd time, you say, " You already asked that.  Tell me something about lunch.  Like, 'I really love when we eat ...' " and let him fill in the blank.  

And when he repeats the new prompted question or statement, you repeat your Sd/command of " You already asked/said that.  Ask/tell me something else. "  And, of course, you can also prompt further questions and comments by responding naturally and asking something else, or making your own observations, as you do in typical conversations.  

You can fade your prompts, over time, from full modeling of the question/statement to starting the question/sentence to pointing at something that might be worth asking a question or making a statement about.

And I second some of the previous recommendations:  find your zen zone and your well of patience.Best,-- Dena Page, M.Ed., CBACertified Behavior Analyst

Certified Auditory Integration Therapy (DAA) PractitionerCertified Irlen ScreenerMoving to Cleveland soon!www.listenbetterwithait.com

On Thu, Jul 15, 2010 at 5:47 AM, <C6885@...> wrote:

 

Come to think of it, ABA might be a little overkill for a child on the mild side of the spectrum.  I wonder what the other moms (and dads) out there think.  But I think that the other suggestions could be helpful.

 

In a message dated 7/14/2010 9:41:55 P.M. Central Daylight Time, C6885@... writes:

 

ABA would definitely help.  Has he seen a psychologist or psychiatrist who works with kids on the spectrum?  Biomed could help, too, there are definite connections between some medical conditions and OCD, for instance.  And getting into your " zen " zone while you're answering or repeating the same things 100 times a day:)

 

In a message dated 7/14/2010 7:47:58 P.M. Central Daylight Time, cowie65@... writes:

 

therapists? what type?>> Oh my goodness, we live on my daughter's daily " scripts. " In order not to > get annoyed, just remember that your son can't control this, his > repetitiveness isn't intentional. Have you spoken to any therapists? Having a lot > of structured time helps. > > > In a message dated 7/14/2010 4:21:10 P.M. Central Daylight Time, > cowie65@... writes:> > > > > Our son is 8 years old and diagnosed PDD-NOS. He always asks the same > questions at different times of the day. Then he will ask several questions > about something I have said. Many of the questions are the same words every > time and then when my voice gets the annoyed sound he will change the wording > around to ask the same thing. How do I handle this to not get so aggrevated > and lower his anxiety about things?> > andrea>

[Guest guest]

Hi ,  my question is, what are his questions about?  (Not that you haven't already answered a million questions today...lol).  Logan (7) is pdd-nos too.  He tends to ask a lot of the same questions when his anxiety is high and he is unsure about the schedule.  Mostly he is needing reassurance about what comes next or what to expect.  We must always have some kind of visual schedule.  Like especially now since it is summer and we don't have our regular school routine.  I noticed it building 2 weeks before school let out.  I bought two dry erase calendar boards that he keeps in his room.  We review it in the morning and before bed and anytime he needs to check it.  I like dry erase because it teaches him that plans are fluid and can be changed, which helps him learn flexibility.  If the questions become a bit much for me, I take a deep breath and redirect him.  I quickly say, " oh, remember when we talked about that earlier and the answer was xyz? " and then I bring up something related.  If he is off-topic, I just say " that's off-topic " and bring him back to the current convo.  This is mostly when we are doing something and he randomly starts scripting about Bros.   He scripts like a wild man when he is nervous.

It really does sound like an anxiety thing, though.  If he picks up anxiety on your end, it might feed his.  Call me tomorrow if you want to chat.  Logan will be school at 10am and I'll have a little alone time

Tara

On Jul 14, 2010 5:19 PM, " " <cowie65@...> wrote:

 

Our son is 8 years old and diagnosed PDD-NOS. He always asks the same questions at different times of the day. Then he will ask several questions about something I have said. Many of the questions are the same words every time and then when my voice gets the annoyed sound he will change the wording around to ask the same thing. How do I handle this to not get so aggrevated and lower his anxiety about things?

andrea