Re: Sleeping Issues

October 11, 2010

Here's a random list of things to try.1. Use a social story about what happens at night.2. Use a baby monitor in reverse, so he can hear you wherever you go.3. Use a heavy pillow/stuffed animal to put on his chest as a grounding tool.

4. Use a heavy blanket to help him settle down and relax to sleep.5. Give him a bath with lavender oil each night before bed.6. Give him a workout a couple hours before you want him to go to sleep. (Not right before bed.)

7. Use music while you're still sleeping with him -- the same soothing CD each night. Eventually, the CD will signal sleepiness in him, even if he's not tired to start, and he probably won't mind so much that you're not there.

8. Use one of your dirty shirts (so it has your scent on it) as a pillow case so he can smell you when he falls asleep.9. Record your voice singing or saying soothing things to him or reading him a story and play it every night. (If doing this, make sure you have back ups of the recording.)

You can combine some of them (and I think the social story should be one you try with whatever else you do). Stick with what you try for at least a good couple weeks so it has a chance to start working and become a routine.

If you need more detail on any of these, feel free to email me or call me at 216 630 9744.DenaDena Page, M.Ed., CBA216-630-9744www.listenbetterwithait.com

Now in OhioCertified Auditory Integration Therapy (DAA) PractitionerCertified Irlen ScreenerCertified Behavior Analyst

On Tue, Oct 12, 2010 at 1:10 AM, <cowie65@...> wrote:

Our is 8 years old and still sleeps with me (yes I know it's horrible). We have (inconsistently) tried to have him sleep in his own room with no success. We experience 2+ hours of crying, screaming, hitting the wall, yelling and when he falls asleep he wakes up every couple hours calling me.

We have tried me laying with him til he falls asleep and he then awakes and starts the crying/hollering; me laying on the floor and moving when he's asleep-- again wakes when I'm moving and starts; cold turkey -- horrible; me sitting in the the room and moving -- gets panicky whe he awakes and doesn't know where I am. Even while he's sleeping with me and I get up to go downstairs or the potty he wakes and gets panicky.

We are open to any and all suggestions be they from experience, professionals, etc.

-- Dena Page, M.Ed., CBA216-630-9744www.listenbetterwithait.comNow in Ohio

Certified Auditory Integration Therapy (DAA) PractitionerCertified Irlen ScreenerCertified Behavior Analyst

October 11, 2010

, you got a lot of great advice. For us it is routine, routine,routine.

On a side note, have you read the book " The Connected Child " ? I think that & my Devon came home around the same age. It is a great book on attachment & brain development in adopted kids. It probably has a lot to do with the panic you mentioned. Logan (Bio and poor sleeper) wakes differently at night than Devon (adopted & issues stemming from underlying attachment). One thing that I've heard over and over is to not let your adopted child cry it out. As an adoptee, I can understand why not.

Tara

October 14, 2010

with savannah, i let her make her jar,decorate it on the outside with glitter stickers,then every time she does a behavior i want to increase she gets a pom pom in the jar. now you can use anything instead of pom poms,like army men,cars,whatever he likes,i just chose pom poms cause theyre cheap lol. i went to the dollar store picked some toys out for the treasure chest,and say i priced some toys at 10 pom poms and some at 8,but they all required 2 red pom poms which she only earned by sleeping in her bed for 1 night. now she sleeps in her bed every night and i made her fill the jar completely to rent a movie.

now with matt i used the book " time out for toddlers " by varni and corwin. Now matt was about 6 or 7 when i used it,so it works well past the toddler stage. Here is their advice for bedtime:Habits to Sleep By

A simple Way to assure good sleep habits is to makesure your child is tired when he goes to sleep. Oftenthe wrong foods, overstimulation, and lack of exer-cise during the day will inhibit a good nightâ€™s sleep.

ExerciseUsually a child will exercise at school, but for pre-schoolers or those children in need of more exercise,make sure he gets playtime daily. This means longwalks, a gym class, an hour or more at the park,

and bike rides for older children.overstimulationThe goal is to try to calm and quiet your child beforehe goes to sleep. Also, try to help your young childput himself to sleep. Many children cannot get to

sleep Without a parent first reading to them, hold-ing them, singing to them, or just sitting in theroom. All of these activities are fine, but not if youhave to be in the room for your child to fall asleep.

Although weâ€™ve stressed how important exercise is, do not let your child run and jump,right beforebedtime, Your toddlerâ€™s adrenaline level will give him enough energy to Stay up for hours! Turnthe television, read books, listen to soft music

simply rub his back. Begin â€œquiet timeâ€ 30before bedtime.Bedtime Behavior ProblemsIt's 10;00 PM, You and your husband havesettled into bed. You start to cuddle. Suddenly avoice at your door Says, " Mommy, I want some water. "

Â You get up and get your toddler some waterYou return and Start to cuddle up again. Then, thevoice at your bedroom door returns. " Mommy, Ihave to go pee-pee.â€ You jump out of bed. After afew minutes you are back. Just as you are about to

climb in bed, â€œMommy, thereâ€™s a monster in myroom.â€ Your child runs into your bed. You get up,take your child into his room, and spend 15 minuteschasing away monsters. When you return to yourspouse, heâ€™S fast asleep. Cuddles are over. Another

night of bedtime blues.Bedtime problems literally can become night-mares if they arenâ€™t stopped quickly. Besides yourpersonal life disintegrating, youâ€™ll look awful. Someparents just foreg0 Sleeping, sex, and silence in or-

der to pacify their child. But sleep problems can be-come chronic if not stopped and can cause emotionalupheaval in a family -The following suggestions should be used withchildren from the moment they can get out of their

beds or cribs. As with â€œTime-Out,â€ it is extremelyimportant that you follow through. If you slip onenight, you may have to start all over again.1. Pick a reasonable bedtime (7 to 8:30 PM), ornaptime, and under normal day-to-day circum-

stances put your child to bed at that time everytime. Although you may want to allow a half-hour leeway on weekends, try to stay with thesame bedtime until it becomes a habit.2. About 30 minutes prior to bedtime, start

" quiet time,â€ during which your child shouldbe occupied with quiet activities.3. Set up a bedtime routine (bath, bedtime story,kisses, drinks, bathroom, and so on). If possi-ble, stick to this routine even if you are on

vacation.4. Put your child in bed, tell him good night andthat you will see him in the morning, turn offthe light, leave the room, and close the door(optional). If your child likes a night-light, thatis fine. l

5. Watch your child very closely the first fewnights, and catch him getting out of bed theinstant he gets up.6. When your child gets up, put him back in bed.Do not talk to him or act angry. Make this as

matter-of-fact as possible. Do not tuck him in,soothe him, or even carry him in an affection-ate manner.7. Continue doing this each time he gets up. Youmay be surprised how often he will get upfirst few nights, but donâ€™t get discouraged- he

is just testing to find out whether you reallymean it. Donâ€™t give up. '8. In the morning, give lots of positive reinforce-ment to your child for staying in bed (if he did)and reward him with something like allowing

him to choose between two different foods helikes. If he didnâ€™t stay in bed, say nothing.Consistency is the key with bedtime problems.Some children may have a more serious sleep dis-order. At some point, if you try everything with to-

tal follow-through and it doesnâ€™t work, we suggestyou seek out a therapist who specializes in sleep-disorder problems.With younger children (one to two years old) itis very important that they feel secure and safe

when they go to sleep. Always have several stuffedanimals and a blanket in his crib or bed that yourchild can use to comfort himself as heâ€™s learningto fall asleep alone. Not all children will take toa transitional object like a blanket, but if you pro-

vide one in the crib in infancy, there is a goodchance that a child will eventually attach to theobject. Most children will keep their â€œblankieâ€with them until they are around live or six or un-til it falls apart. This is normal. Never throw away

a security blanket no matter how dirty or ratty itis.There are numerous lullaby cassette tapes on themarket, which can help lull your little one to sleep.When you put on the tape, make sure the music is

not too loud.Crying is extremely distressing for parents. Theyworry that some horrible thing has happened totheir child and find themselves running back andforth to their toddlerâ€™s room every time they hear a

peep. After a while, your child learns that the lit-tlest cry will get them attention.Here comes the hard part. If you donâ€™t want to getup â€˜and down all night, do not go into the roomwhen your child cries; especially if this has become

an established attention-getting pattern. He maycry for an hour or more. He may also make noises,yell, or call. DO NOT give in. The first time youbreak down your child will know what to do to getyour attention. Donâ€™t get discouraged. This method

should work after less than a Week. Once your childis going to bed after crying for only a minute or two,you can go into the bedroom to check on him tomake sure everything is all right.For any bedtime crying, remember:

1. Do not talk to your child after he is down forthe night.2. Check his diapers (if applicable) quickly.3. If everything is OK, leave the room quietly.For children who have a habit of going into theirparentsâ€™ beds, the same rules apply:

1. Pick up your child and put him back in his bedas matter-of-factly as possible. Do this as manytimes as necessary, no matter how much heprotests. The first few times, you may havedo this ten times or more!

D0 not talk to your child as you return himto his bed.Be prepared to be persistent. One night inyour bed is so reinforcing that itâ€™s almostguaranteed to become a regular habitAfter two to three nights (a week in long standing cases)

Â your child should begin to understand that sleeping in your bed is no longeracceptable behavior.aOn Mon, Oct 11, 2010 at 5:10 PM, <cowie65@...> wrote:

Our is 8 years old and still sleeps with me (yes I know it's horrible). Â We have (inconsistently) tried to have him sleep in his own room with no success. Â We experience 2+ hours of crying, screaming, hitting the wall, yelling and when he falls asleep he wakes up every couple hours calling me.

We have tried me laying with him til he falls asleep and he then awakes and starts the crying/hollering; me laying on the floor and moving when he's asleep-- again wakes when I'm moving and starts; cold turkey -- horrible; Â me sitting in the the room and moving -- gets panicky whe he awakes and doesn't know where I am. Â Even while he's sleeping with me and I get up to go downstairs or the potty he wakes and gets panicky.

We are open to any and all suggestions be they from experience, professionals, etc.

------------------------------------

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See our New Website: http://.webs.com/index.htm

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May love be with you and your family.

Any information posted on may not necessarily be endorsed by or ASGC and will left to your discernment. Â In your best interest, please research all info before making any decisions. Â All email posted by parents are only for sharing experiences, please research and consult with a physician who is up to date on autism for yourself before deciding on anything. Â Keep researching for the right answers for your family.

~~~ Resources - (See more resources on the new website.)

quick References:

and ASGC have joined together to bring more resources to the Northeast Ohio area.

~~~

ASGC Independence - Monthly Support Meeting:

The first Monday of each month we meet with the Autism Society of Greater Cleveland (ASGC). Â A Childcare activities program is provided for both children on the spectrum and their siblings and is covered by the ASGC. Â See website for details on topics.

Independence Location:

Independence Civic Center.

6363 Selig Drive, Independence, OH Â 44131

*Childcare RSVP: 216-556-4937; please give 7 day notice.

ASGC website - http://www.asgc.org

Avon Lake location and meeting topic please see ASGC website. http://www.asgc.org

~~~

ABA Milestones: Conferences & Resources:

http://www.milestones.org

~~~

Autism Scholarship Program:

For parents who choose a private school instead of public schools.

http://autismohio.org/index.php?option=com_content & task=view & id=520 & Itemid=134

~~~

Biomedical Meetings:

Posted to the list by Pattison

Biomedical Online:

Autism-Biomed-Ohio

NAA-NEO Meetings and Events:

See email postings as they arrive from .

~~~

slaw

Information on Legal rights: http://www.wrightslaw.com

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IEP Guide:

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October 14, 2010

What a great system! One of the things I LOVE about pom-poms is that when you want to make it (whatever IT is) that bit harder, you can just replace the original pom-poms with slightly smaller pom-poms so it takes more to fill the jar! Sneaky :-)

On Wed, Oct 13, 2010 at 10:25 PM, paula miller <pcmiller25@...> wrote:

with savannah, i let her make her jar,decorate it on the outside with glitter stickers,then every time she does a behavior i want to increase she gets a pom pom in the jar. now you can use anything instead of pom poms,like army men,cars,whatever he likes,i just chose pom poms cause theyre cheap lol. i went to the dollar store picked some toys out for the treasure chest,and say i priced some toys at 10 pom poms and some at 8,but they all required 2 red pom poms which she only earned by sleeping in her bed for 1 night. now she sleeps in her bed every night and i made her fill the jar completely to rent a movie.

-- Dena Page, M.Ed., CBA216-630-9744www.listenbetterwithait.comNow in Ohio

Certified Auditory Integration Therapy (DAA) PractitionerCertified Irlen ScreenerCertified Behavior Analyst

October 20, 2010

Wow that sounds challenging ! Have you tried using a social story for your ASD child and your toddler so they can adjust to the idea of sleeping in same room and what they may expect from that? Maybe you could put down your toddler to sleep in the bedroom where you expect him to sleep eventually... And stay with him until he falls asleep. That may help your ASD child too with this adjustment! If your toddler wakes in the middle if the night you should bring him back to his bed and stay with him until he falls asleep. Eventually you can fade yourself out! Reinforcement helps!! Good luck! Sent from my iPhoneOn Oct 20, 2010, at 12:37 PM, paula miller <pcmiller25@...> wrote:

Do you know what causes him to wake up? bathroom? bad dreams? if so maybe limit fluids or tv. A counselor once told me that whatever they do 2 hrs b4 bedtime they can dream about. Savannah use to wake up from bad dreams frequently and she didn't stop til i started sending her right back to bed and using the 2 red pom poms. One red one was for going to bed and the other was for staying there all night. Of course i had gotten a few toys she really wanted and to earn them she had to have those 2 pom poms. And building her up telling her how brave she is, making a big deal of how good she does,how proud i am. I also used veggie tales "Where's God when i'm scared" ,i have the movie clip if you want it.

maybe set some days aside to be training days, possibly the weekend.paulaOn Wed, Oct 20, 2010 at 11:35 AM, Mason <masonsarah28@...> wrote:

Do you have any suggestions for my toddler who will not sleep in his own bed who shares a room with his 4 year old autistic brother? I would normally let him cry it out but I do not want him to wake his brother so I let him sleep in my bed when he wakes up. He only sleeps for a couple of hours in his bed before he wakes up. I usually let him fall asleep in my bed also because of his brother. I just feel pretty clueless as to how to start the whole process. Thanks!! Mason

Our is 8 years old and still sleeps with me (yes I know it's horrible). We have (inconsistently) tried to have him sleep in his own room with no success. We experience 2+ hours of crying, screaming, hitting the wall, yelling and when he falls asleep he wakes up every couple hours calling me.

We have tried me laying with him til he falls asleep and he then awakes and starts the crying/hollering; me laying on the floor and moving when he's asleep-- again wakes when I'm moving and starts; cold turkey -- horrible; me sitting in the the room and moving -- gets panicky whe he awakes and doesn't know where I am. Even while he's sleeping with me and I get up to go downstairs or the potty he wakes and gets panicky.

We are open to any and all suggestions be they from experience, professionals,

etc.------------------------------------~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~See our New Website: http://.webs.com/index.htm

~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~May love be with you and your family.Any information posted on may not necessarily be endorsed by or ASGC and will left to your discernment. In your best interest, please research all info before making any decisions. All email posted by parents are only for sharing experiences, please research and consult with a physician who is up to date on autism for yourself before deciding on anything. Keep researching for the right answers for your family.

~~~ Resources - (See more resources on the new website.)quick References: and ASGC have joined together to bring more resources to the Northeast Ohio

area.~~~ASGC Independence - Monthly Support Meeting:The first Monday of each month we meet with the Autism Society of Greater Cleveland (ASGC). A Childcare activities program is provided for both children on the spectrum and their siblings and is covered by the ASGC. See website for details on topics.

Independence Location:Independence Civic Center.6363 Selig Drive, Independence, OH 44131*Childcare RSVP: 216-556-4937; please give 7 day notice.ASGC website - http://www.asgc.org

Avon Lake location and meeting topic please see ASGC website. http://www.asgc.org~~~ABA Milestones: Conferences & Resources:http://www.milestones.org

~~~Autism Scholarship Program:For

parents who choose a private school instead of public schools.http://autismohio.org/index.php?option=com_content & task=view & id=520 & Itemid=134

~~~Biomedical Meetings:Posted to the list by PattisonBiomedical Online:Autism-Biomed-Ohio

NAA-NEO Meetings and Events:See email postings as they arrive from .~~~slawInformation on Legal rights: http://www.wrightslaw.com

~~~IEP Guide:IEP_guide! Groups

Links<*> To visit your group on the web, go to: /<*> Your email settings:

Individual Email | Traditional<*> To change settings online go to: /join

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October 20, 2010

The only reason that I can think of that he wakes is because I'm not there. This started about 4-5 months ago, nothing new happened around that time. At first i thought he was waking because he was having problems with constipation, but he has kept it up since we have resolved that problem. my 10 year old stepson would not sleep alone the whole first 2 years of my husband and I's marriage. granted he had a lot of emotional problems. he also wet the bed, and played with my hair endlessly. I watched an episode of Nanny 911 and did what she did to get the child to sleep in their bed and to my surprise it worked! he also stopped playing with my hair after that. It took a little while to tackle the bedwetting, but that eventually phased out too. I tried it with my little one and it just didn't work! I am thinking of taking my ASD son out of their room and putting

him with his big brother, that way I can work with my little one more intensely without the risk of waking his brother. Than phase him back in. What do you think? Oh and I have a baby girl due in February. I would really like for him to be sleeping through the night by the time she comes!!!! I've tried with the little toys and reward things with potty training and have had no luck,I think he is terrified of that because of the constipation. One challange at a time though!! And sleeping for me definately takes precedence. We do have a bedtime routine, bath, books, prayers. Maybe I can add backrub to that. As far as me staying in the room til he falls asleep, I'm afraid he will expect me to be there if he wakes, then he will get out of bed. It worked with my stepson though, maybe I will try again and be more vigilant. Thanks ladies for the suggestions!!!!!

Our is 8 years old and still sleeps with me (yes I know it's horrible). We have (inconsistently) tried to have him sleep in his own room with no success. We experience 2+ hours of crying, screaming, hitting the wall, yelling and when he falls asleep he wakes up every couple hours calling me.We have tried me laying with him til he falls asleep and he then awakes and starts the crying/hollering; me laying on the floor and moving when he's asleep-- again wakes when I'm moving and starts; cold turkey -- horrible; me sitting in the the room and moving -- gets panicky whe he awakes and doesn't know where I am. Even while he's sleeping with me and I get up to go downstairs or the potty he wakes and gets panicky.We are open to any and all suggestions be they from experience, professionals,

etc.------------------------------------~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~See our New Website: http://.webs.com/index.htm~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~May love be with you and your family.Any information posted on may not necessarily be endorsed by or ASGC and will left to your discernment. In your best interest, please research all info before making any decisions. All email posted by parents are only for sharing experiences, please research and consult with a physician who is up to date on autism for yourself before deciding on anything. Keep researching for the right answers for your family.~~~ Resources - (See more resources on the new website.)quick References: and ASGC have joined

together to bring more resources to the Northeast Ohio area.~~~ASGC Independence - Monthly Support Meeting:The first Monday of each month we meet with the Autism Society of Greater Cleveland (ASGC). A Childcare activities program is provided for both children on the spectrum and their siblings and is covered by the ASGC. See website for details on topics.Independence Location:Independence Civic Center.6363 Selig Drive, Independence, OH 44131*Childcare RSVP: 216-556-4937; please give 7 day notice.ASGC website - http://www.asgc.orgAvon Lake location and meeting topic please see ASGC website. http://www.asgc.org~~~ABA

Milestones: Conferences & Resources:http://www.milestones.org~~~Autism Scholarship Program:For parents who choose a private school instead of public schools.http://autismohio.org/index.php?option=com_content & task=view & id=520 & Itemid=134~~~Biomedical Meetings:Posted to the list by PattisonBiomedical Online:Autism-Biomed-OhioNAA-NEO Meetings and Events:See email postings as they arrive from .~~~slawInformation on Legal rights: http://www.wrightslaw.com~~~IEP Guide:IEP_guide

October 20, 2010

Have you tried brushing him about 15-30 min. before bed time? This works like a charm for our son. He still wakes up sometimes but it helps him relax and fall asleep easier. Just a thought...You may have already tried it. Duncan-Luckett

513-478-9408

Our is 8 years old and still sleeps with me (yes I know it's horrible). We have (inconsistently) tried to have him sleep in his own room with no success. We experience 2+ hours of crying, screaming, hitting the wall, yelling and when he falls asleep he wakes up every couple hours calling me.

We have tried me laying with him til he falls asleep and he then awakes and starts the crying/hollering; me laying on the floor and moving when he's asleep-- again wakes when I'm moving and starts; cold turkey -- horrible; me sitting in the the room and moving -- gets panicky whe he awakes and doesn't know where I am. Even while he's sleeping with me and I get up to go downstairs or the potty he wakes and gets panicky.

We are open to any and all suggestions be they from experience, professionals,

etc.------------------------------------~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~See our New Website: http://.webs.com/index.htm

~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~May love be with you and your family.Any information posted on may not necessarily be endorsed by or ASGC and will left to your discernment. In your best interest, please research all info before making any decisions. All email posted by parents are only for sharing experiences, please research and consult with a physician who is up to date on autism for yourself before deciding on anything. Keep researching for the right answers for your family.

~~~ Resources - (See more resources on the new website.)quick References: and ASGC have joined

together to bring more resources to the Northeast Ohio area.~~~ASGC Independence - Monthly Support Meeting:The first Monday of each month we meet with the Autism Society of Greater Cleveland (ASGC). A Childcare activities program is provided for both children on the spectrum and their siblings and is covered by the ASGC. See website for details on topics.

Independence Location:Independence Civic Center.6363 Selig Drive, Independence, OH 44131*Childcare RSVP: 216-556-4937; please give 7 day notice.ASGC website - http://www.asgc.org

Avon Lake location and meeting topic please see ASGC website. http://www.asgc.org

~~~ABA

Milestones: Conferences & Resources:http://www.milestones.org

~~~Autism Scholarship Program:For parents who choose a private school instead of public schools.http://autismohio.org/index.php?option=com_content & task=view & id=520 & Itemid=134

~~~Biomedical Meetings:Posted to the list by PattisonBiomedical Online:Autism-Biomed-Ohio

NAA-NEO Meetings and Events:See email postings as they arrive from .~~~slawInformation on Legal rights: http://www.wrightslaw.com

~~~IEP Guide:IEP_guide

October 20, 2010

I agree a!! A good sensory diet can do magic! Talk to an OT though and make sure you are applying the brushing protocol correctly otherwise it may be actually counterproductive Sent from my iPhoneOn Oct 20, 2010, at 5:17 PM, Duncan <eriduncan06@...> wrote: