Re: Re: OT: More to Love?

[Guest guest]

Thank you Judy!!!!!! I would love to have you there sharing your awesome insights too!!!!

Re: OT: More to Love?

Wow, it looks like I really started something here. I didn't think the discussion would get this intense so fast.Kassia has a great point that the media wrongly portrays how people--especially women--should look. I'm not in favor of that at all.My suspicion about this show is that it may normalize obesity by showing what a great thing it is that such a woman can find a guy.Now, before everybody throws rotten tomatoes (or worse) at me, let me make myself clear. I know it's not realistic to expect every woman to be a miniature size, and I wish the media didn't put that pressure out there. At the same time, approving of obesity is not a healthy message to send either. I suspect the tone of the show will be "See, here's a guy who's not too shallow to date a heavy woman unlike the rest of you shallow American men, so there's nothing wrong with being fat."To which my response is: Yes, there is something wrong with that. It's hazardous to your health. Where is the personal responsibility of those who are overweight? How can anybody--male or female--live a lifestyle that contributes to obesity and all the health problems that come with it and yet expect that other people should just overlook the problems of being in a relationship with an obese person?Maybe the guy on the show does have a problem with women so he needs something pathetic like this show to get a date. (Of course he's also doing it for the money.) But if he's smart, why would he get into a relationship with a woman who is on a collision course with a heart attack and could be dead in a few years?Of course, not all obesity is within our ability to control. I've known people with thyroid problems and things that make them obese no matter what. I don't blame them for the way they are, and I feel sorry for them. But I have no sympathy for the growing number of people in this country--both men and women--who are to darned lazy and undisciplined to take responsibility for keeping themselves healthy. Face it; that's what most of American obesity is.I bust my butt down there in the workout room 5 or 6 days a week just like a lot of you. I don't think I have a right to expect that a woman should fall in love with me if decide to let myself blow up to 300 lbs. Willingly letting your health go down the drain like that is selfish, short-sighted and says a lot about your personality.Okay, can I come out from cover now? :-)>> oh yeah kitchen nightmares. it was originally a BBC thing he did in britian then brought over here. tell ya the american version MADE tv b/c of how more embarrassing the ppl in america acted over britian. > > donna i have to agree we are over bombarded with images of perfection and beauty. while its nice to play dress and be glamorous there is almost no looking at the other side of things and if some magazines do its with such negativity that its hard to see ourselves as "pretty" when celebs with the same "flaws" with get chastize for it in a magazine. > > i read one standing line one day about katherine heigel and her "saggy butt". she didn't really have a saggy butt but she is like a kettlebell queen like darcy and i so i took a little offense that this thin woman who can hoist heavy bells with the best of can't be given a positive spin. okay she is not perfect but she is a strong lady to take on such a tough routine from a tough trainer! they sure as heck don't say that! > > i have a bit of belly buldge that hates to go away the older i get. its hard to say gosh i am strong i workout hard when i have the body of britney when everybody called her fat.shoot i would have like to have been britney fat LOL she was still in better shape then my abs look now. i have serious self esteem issues b/c i was raised by somebody in the same fashion. never looking on the bright side or the positives or even praising when it was good time too. just always negative negative could be better etc. there are millions like me too! like i said i won't blame media on ALL of it but they have their hands in a big chunk of it. > > i give a shout out to all my curvy girls though b/c real men love curves and a woman who isn't afraid to order more then just a light salad on a date. > > kassia>

[Guest guest]

There are many reasons for obesity and most of the time people CAN control it but choose not to. They choose to pity themselves, blame everyone else (including their parents) and not take personal responsibility. In most cases, but not all, it is cop-out. It isn't a matter of calling yourself names and telling yourself to do it. That NEVER helps. It is a matter of caring enough about yourself and the people you love to actually take responsibility and make the changes necessary to be healthy. Definitely not easy and for some people it is much, much harder but it is also definitely not impossible.

Re: Re: OT: More to Love?

i know a few like this and it stems further then just weight.its self esteem and lack of mental ability to do so,so their pattern is to make fun of others in some way or try to find a weak spot. whose to say where it started but they choose in some way to continue the pattern.obviously these women must be proud of themselves to have the confidence to be on tv and that is great but my issue is all these shows with average women or size 2 gals, always exploit drama and this one i am afraid will go for the social jugular with the weight and what ppl think of them and their weight and judge them for weight and looks. some of them look very pretty and seem so sweet. like i say before i have a bit of a belly bulge and it bothers me i am trying to work on it,but i have one bitch at work that will just point out and be negative like this little bulge defines who i am. there is more to me then a little stomach. there are just as many ppl like the evil woman i work with(whom is naturally thin good for her but eats like crap and parties like she is 20 again but won't come weight lift with me hhhmm) who will be willinging to define you to other based on how you look and its almost that repeat pattern again of ppl judging you. even working out they expect me to be thin like pari hilton or something when i am looking for strength and ability. overall its a media frenzy of looks! well i don't seem ppl on this group on any magazine covers and they are more of an inspiration and more beautiful then celebs and reality 15 min of fame stars. but not everybody would appreciate the beauty of each of us b/c they are so wrapped up in working out for looks then they are about health and strength and i blame a lot of tv for that. kassia

fitness blogSpecial Needs Scouting

I just lose all patience with people who whine about their obesity or poor health even though they have made the choices that made them that way.---

[Guest guest]

There are many reasons for obesity and most of the time people CAN control it but choose not to. They choose to pity themselves, blame everyone else (including their parents) and not take personal responsibility. In most cases, but not all, it is cop-out. It isn't a matter of calling yourself names and telling yourself to do it. That NEVER helps. It is a matter of caring enough about yourself and the people you love to actually take responsibility and make the changes necessary to be healthy. Definitely not easy and for some people it is much, much harder but it is also definitely not impossible.

Re: Re: OT: More to Love?

i know a few like this and it stems further then just weight.its self esteem and lack of mental ability to do so,so their pattern is to make fun of others in some way or try to find a weak spot. whose to say where it started but they choose in some way to continue the pattern.obviously these women must be proud of themselves to have the confidence to be on tv and that is great but my issue is all these shows with average women or size 2 gals, always exploit drama and this one i am afraid will go for the social jugular with the weight and what ppl think of them and their weight and judge them for weight and looks. some of them look very pretty and seem so sweet. like i say before i have a bit of a belly bulge and it bothers me i am trying to work on it,but i have one bitch at work that will just point out and be negative like this little bulge defines who i am. there is more to me then a little stomach. there are just as many ppl like the evil woman i work with(whom is naturally thin good for her but eats like crap and parties like she is 20 again but won't come weight lift with me hhhmm) who will be willinging to define you to other based on how you look and its almost that repeat pattern again of ppl judging you. even working out they expect me to be thin like pari hilton or something when i am looking for strength and ability. overall its a media frenzy of looks! well i don't seem ppl on this group on any magazine covers and they are more of an inspiration and more beautiful then celebs and reality 15 min of fame stars. but not everybody would appreciate the beauty of each of us b/c they are so wrapped up in working out for looks then they are about health and strength and i blame a lot of tv for that. kassia

fitness blogSpecial Needs Scouting

I just lose all patience with people who whine about their obesity or poor health even though they have made the choices that made them that way.---

[Guest guest]

Way to go, Trisha!

Re: OT: More to Love?Date: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 2:31 PM

Thanks, everybody. Donna, I'll even go a little further than you did. I think it is fair to make a judgment about people who won't lose weight. (Not those who for medical reasons CAN'T but those who just WON'T.) It does say something about you and what you think of the people who love you if you're not willing to make your own health a priority. I'm all in favor of supporting those who want to improve themselves. I just lose all patience with people who whine about their obesity or poor health even though they have made the choices that made them that way.> >> > oh yeah kitchen nightmares. it was originally a BBC thing he did in britian then brought over here. tell ya the american version MADE tv b/c of how more embarrassing the ppl in america acted over britian. > > > > donna i have to agree we are over bombarded with images of perfection and beauty. while its nice to play dress and be glamorous there is almost no looking at the other side of things and if some magazines do its with such negativity that its hard to see ourselves as "pretty" when celebs with the same "flaws" with get chastize for it in a magazine. > > > > i read one standing line one day about katherine heigel and her "saggy butt". she didn't really have a saggy butt but she is like a kettlebell queen like darcy and i so i took a little offense that this thin woman who can hoist heavy bells with the best of can't be given a positive spin. okay she is not perfect but she is a strong lady to take on such a tough routine from a tough trainer! they sure as heck don't say that! > > > > i have a bit of belly buldge that hates to go away the older i get. its hard to say gosh i am strong i workout hard when i have the body of britney when everybody called her fat.shoot i would have like to have been britney fat LOL she was still in better shape then my abs look now. i have serious self esteem issues b/c i was raised by somebody in the same fashion. never looking on the bright side or the positives or even praising when it was good time too. just always negative negative could be better etc. there are millions like me too! like i said i won't blame media on ALL of it but they have their hands in a big chunk of it. > > > > i give a shout out to all my curvy girls though b/c real men love curves and a woman who isn't afraid to order more then just a light salad on a date. > > > > kassia> >>

[Guest guest]

Way to go, Trisha!

Re: OT: More to Love?Date: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 2:31 PM

Thanks, everybody. Donna, I'll even go a little further than you did. I think it is fair to make a judgment about people who won't lose weight. (Not those who for medical reasons CAN'T but those who just WON'T.) It does say something about you and what you think of the people who love you if you're not willing to make your own health a priority. I'm all in favor of supporting those who want to improve themselves. I just lose all patience with people who whine about their obesity or poor health even though they have made the choices that made them that way.> >> > oh yeah kitchen nightmares. it was originally a BBC thing he did in britian then brought over here. tell ya the american version MADE tv b/c of how more embarrassing the ppl in america acted over britian. > > > > donna i have to agree we are over bombarded with images of perfection and beauty. while its nice to play dress and be glamorous there is almost no looking at the other side of things and if some magazines do its with such negativity that its hard to see ourselves as "pretty" when celebs with the same "flaws" with get chastize for it in a magazine. > > > > i read one standing line one day about katherine heigel and her "saggy butt". she didn't really have a saggy butt but she is like a kettlebell queen like darcy and i so i took a little offense that this thin woman who can hoist heavy bells with the best of can't be given a positive spin. okay she is not perfect but she is a strong lady to take on such a tough routine from a tough trainer! they sure as heck don't say that! > > > > i have a bit of belly buldge that hates to go away the older i get. its hard to say gosh i am strong i workout hard when i have the body of britney when everybody called her fat.shoot i would have like to have been britney fat LOL she was still in better shape then my abs look now. i have serious self esteem issues b/c i was raised by somebody in the same fashion. never looking on the bright side or the positives or even praising when it was good time too. just always negative negative could be better etc. there are millions like me too! like i said i won't blame media on ALL of it but they have their hands in a big chunk of it. > > > > i give a shout out to all my curvy girls though b/c real men love curves and a woman who isn't afraid to order more then just a light salad on a date. > > > > kassia> >>

[Guest guest]

Way to go, Trisha!

Re: OT: More to Love?Date: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 2:31 PM

Thanks, everybody. Donna, I'll even go a little further than you did. I think it is fair to make a judgment about people who won't lose weight. (Not those who for medical reasons CAN'T but those who just WON'T.) It does say something about you and what you think of the people who love you if you're not willing to make your own health a priority. I'm all in favor of supporting those who want to improve themselves. I just lose all patience with people who whine about their obesity or poor health even though they have made the choices that made them that way.> >> > oh yeah kitchen nightmares. it was originally a BBC thing he did in britian then brought over here. tell ya the american version MADE tv b/c of how more embarrassing the ppl in america acted over britian. > > > > donna i have to agree we are over bombarded with images of perfection and beauty. while its nice to play dress and be glamorous there is almost no looking at the other side of things and if some magazines do its with such negativity that its hard to see ourselves as "pretty" when celebs with the same "flaws" with get chastize for it in a magazine. > > > > i read one standing line one day about katherine heigel and her "saggy butt". she didn't really have a saggy butt but she is like a kettlebell queen like darcy and i so i took a little offense that this thin woman who can hoist heavy bells with the best of can't be given a positive spin. okay she is not perfect but she is a strong lady to take on such a tough routine from a tough trainer! they sure as heck don't say that! > > > > i have a bit of belly buldge that hates to go away the older i get. its hard to say gosh i am strong i workout hard when i have the body of britney when everybody called her fat.shoot i would have like to have been britney fat LOL she was still in better shape then my abs look now. i have serious self esteem issues b/c i was raised by somebody in the same fashion. never looking on the bright side or the positives or even praising when it was good time too. just always negative negative could be better etc. there are millions like me too! like i said i won't blame media on ALL of it but they have their hands in a big chunk of it. > > > > i give a shout out to all my curvy girls though b/c real men love curves and a woman who isn't afraid to order more then just a light salad on a date. > > > > kassia> >>

[Guest guest]

A lot of my members complain about family and friends sabotaging their weight loss efforts by saying things like "You're too skinny already, you can eat this!" I always tell them to look at the source. Almost always the source is someone who is either overweight themselves or does not have healthy eating and exercise habits. They sabotage because then you don't make them look or feel bad. I had to deal with someone like this for a long time. She still does make comments from time to time but those are in her "poor me moments" I've learned. She's asked me for help losing weight at times and has made some wonderful changes on her own. I like to think my sticking to my guns, choosing to eat healthy foods especially without ever saying a word beyond, "This is what I like to eat" has helped her to make the decision to do better for herself too.

Re: Re: OT: More to Love? Date: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 7:27 PM

Kassia

I am sorry you have a co worker that is so insensitive to say things like that to you. I don't understand people who feel like they have to give you their two cents worth, when you didn't even ask. Some people I know that weigh more than me like to call me 'frail' because I am thinner than them. With the weights I work out with I KNOW I am not frail:-) But it used to bother me a lot, that they would say that. I think jealousy has so much to do with the comments. I am guessing your co worker is jealous of your dedication to working out and wishes she had that kind of staying power, saying things to you in some way makes her feel better. I am sorry.

A Good Credit Score is 700 or Above. See yours in just 2 easy steps!

[Guest guest]

A lot of my members complain about family and friends sabotaging their weight loss efforts by saying things like "You're too skinny already, you can eat this!" I always tell them to look at the source. Almost always the source is someone who is either overweight themselves or does not have healthy eating and exercise habits. They sabotage because then you don't make them look or feel bad. I had to deal with someone like this for a long time. She still does make comments from time to time but those are in her "poor me moments" I've learned. She's asked me for help losing weight at times and has made some wonderful changes on her own. I like to think my sticking to my guns, choosing to eat healthy foods especially without ever saying a word beyond, "This is what I like to eat" has helped her to make the decision to do better for herself too.

Re: Re: OT: More to Love? Date: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 7:27 PM

Kassia

I am sorry you have a co worker that is so insensitive to say things like that to you. I don't understand people who feel like they have to give you their two cents worth, when you didn't even ask. Some people I know that weigh more than me like to call me 'frail' because I am thinner than them. With the weights I work out with I KNOW I am not frail:-) But it used to bother me a lot, that they would say that. I think jealousy has so much to do with the comments. I am guessing your co worker is jealous of your dedication to working out and wishes she had that kind of staying power, saying things to you in some way makes her feel better. I am sorry.

A Good Credit Score is 700 or Above. See yours in just 2 easy steps!

[Guest guest]

The non-scale victories, being able to do more in an exercise video than you could do last time, clothing fitting better, losing inches, making progress on changing unhelpful habits, etc. are WAY more important than the numbers on the scale (that fluctuate day to day anyway). Be proud of what you've achieved so far and to heck with the scale!

Re: Re: OT: More to Love?

Trish you are doing fantastic. Look back at the last week and how many HUGE improvements you have made. You should feel really proud. Don't say you are a failure. You are still doing it:-) Keep up the wonderful strides!!!!

Hot Deals at Dell on Popular Laptops perfect for Back to School

[Guest guest]

The non-scale victories, being able to do more in an exercise video than you could do last time, clothing fitting better, losing inches, making progress on changing unhelpful habits, etc. are WAY more important than the numbers on the scale (that fluctuate day to day anyway). Be proud of what you've achieved so far and to heck with the scale!

Re: Re: OT: More to Love?

Trish you are doing fantastic. Look back at the last week and how many HUGE improvements you have made. You should feel really proud. Don't say you are a failure. You are still doing it:-) Keep up the wonderful strides!!!!

Hot Deals at Dell on Popular Laptops perfect for Back to School

[Guest guest]

How happy can they be if they're whining about no one dating them and they're on a show like that????

Re: OT: More to Love?> > > I agree, this has been a good "hot topic" thread!> > I am split in two. On one hand I agree with Kassia, our society is overly obsessed with other peoples' weight and maybe this show will in some way glamorize being obese? > > That said, I am in Judy's "fat and fit" category myself. I'm at 210 right now and not happy with this and taking steps to change this. I was at 170 last year. I teach Turbo Kick and can do a Cathe workout. I have slender friends who are winded and done within 10 minutes!> > I have been told by men before in tactful and sometimes not-so-tactful ways that they liked me a lot but that I was too fat for them to date. I understand, you like what you like, but it also bums me out that they supposedly like me that much and this is the one thing that stands in the way. What if I was 140 lbs, they got everything they wanted, then I got in a car accident and lost both of my legs? Would they still love me and stick around or would they split?> > I have also been blessed to have dated men who liked me just the way I was, and what a glorious feeling that is! Men preferring slender women is mostly a North American and European thing, other cultures prefer women with some meat on their bones. > > In short - thank goodness for those men out there who like heavier women and aren't afraid to defy the North American norm or buy into the size 6 and under craze!> > >

[Guest guest]

Trisha,

The thing is though that you CAN have all those things...

I've got a million reasons of my own for why I didn't lose weight and keep it off for the 20 years I tried previously. Many stem from abuse, being picked on as a kid and the list goes on and on. I felt jealous of all those fit people because I wanted to be like them but didn't believe I could be. At some point you just have to decide you will be like them. At some point, you have to get rid of the "could have been" and "the should have been" and "if only someone..." excuses and make yourself what you really want to be. And you have to want it badly enough to make it happen for reasons that will keep you motivated over the long haul and through frustrations.

Mine is cancer. I'm a 5 year breast cancer survivor, diagnosed just a month after my 37th birthday with 2 kids (ages 2 & 5 at the time). Being overweight didn't cause my cancer (no one knows why, I'm negative for the genes and had few risk factors) but staying overweight wasn't helping my chances to keep it away. Every time I get away from my healthier habits I remind myself why I'm doing them. I don't want the extra helping or the mindless snacking because I'm anxious or bored as badly as I want to see my kids graduate from high school or as much as I want to be able to move easily and do whatever I want because being overweight isn't holding me back from doing them. Sometimes I don't get back into the healthy stuff as fast as I could and usually it is because I've allowed myself to get mired down in emotional muck. I pull myself free again by reminding myself what is really important. Me.

You CAN have all those things... I finally do.

Re: Re: OT: More to Love?Date: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 7:27 PM

Kassia

I am sorry you have a co worker that is so insensitive to say things like that to you. I don't understand people who feel like they have to give you their two cents worth, when you didn't even ask. Some people I know that weigh more than me like to call me 'frail' because I am thinner than them. With the weights I work out with I KNOW I am not frail:-) But it used to bother me a lot, that they would say that. I think jealousy has so much to do with the comments. I am guessing your co worker is jealous of your dedication to working out and wishes she had that kind of staying power, saying things to you in some way makes her feel better. I am sorry.

A Good Credit Score is 700 or Above. See yours in just 2 easy steps!

[Guest guest]

How happy can they be if they're whining about no one dating them and they're on a show like that????

Re: OT: More to Love?> > > I agree, this has been a good "hot topic" thread!> > I am split in two. On one hand I agree with Kassia, our society is overly obsessed with other peoples' weight and maybe this show will in some way glamorize being obese? > > That said, I am in Judy's "fat and fit" category myself. I'm at 210 right now and not happy with this and taking steps to change this. I was at 170 last year. I teach Turbo Kick and can do a Cathe workout. I have slender friends who are winded and done within 10 minutes!> > I have been told by men before in tactful and sometimes not-so-tactful ways that they liked me a lot but that I was too fat for them to date. I understand, you like what you like, but it also bums me out that they supposedly like me that much and this is the one thing that stands in the way. What if I was 140 lbs, they got everything they wanted, then I got in a car accident and lost both of my legs? Would they still love me and stick around or would they split?> > I have also been blessed to have dated men who liked me just the way I was, and what a glorious feeling that is! Men preferring slender women is mostly a North American and European thing, other cultures prefer women with some meat on their bones. > > In short - thank goodness for those men out there who like heavier women and aren't afraid to defy the North American norm or buy into the size 6 and under craze!> > >

[Guest guest]

Trisha,

The thing is though that you CAN have all those things...

I've got a million reasons of my own for why I didn't lose weight and keep it off for the 20 years I tried previously. Many stem from abuse, being picked on as a kid and the list goes on and on. I felt jealous of all those fit people because I wanted to be like them but didn't believe I could be. At some point you just have to decide you will be like them. At some point, you have to get rid of the "could have been" and "the should have been" and "if only someone..." excuses and make yourself what you really want to be. And you have to want it badly enough to make it happen for reasons that will keep you motivated over the long haul and through frustrations.

Mine is cancer. I'm a 5 year breast cancer survivor, diagnosed just a month after my 37th birthday with 2 kids (ages 2 & 5 at the time). Being overweight didn't cause my cancer (no one knows why, I'm negative for the genes and had few risk factors) but staying overweight wasn't helping my chances to keep it away. Every time I get away from my healthier habits I remind myself why I'm doing them. I don't want the extra helping or the mindless snacking because I'm anxious or bored as badly as I want to see my kids graduate from high school or as much as I want to be able to move easily and do whatever I want because being overweight isn't holding me back from doing them. Sometimes I don't get back into the healthy stuff as fast as I could and usually it is because I've allowed myself to get mired down in emotional muck. I pull myself free again by reminding myself what is really important. Me.

You CAN have all those things... I finally do.

Re: Re: OT: More to Love?Date: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 7:27 PM

Kassia

I am sorry you have a co worker that is so insensitive to say things like that to you. I don't understand people who feel like they have to give you their two cents worth, when you didn't even ask. Some people I know that weigh more than me like to call me 'frail' because I am thinner than them. With the weights I work out with I KNOW I am not frail:-) But it used to bother me a lot, that they would say that. I think jealousy has so much to do with the comments. I am guessing your co worker is jealous of your dedication to working out and wishes she had that kind of staying power, saying things to you in some way makes her feel better. I am sorry.

A Good Credit Score is 700 or Above. See yours in just 2 easy steps!

[Guest guest]

that's what i have always done. i have never relied on a scale but for some reason now i feel i have to see those numbers to know there is a difference. it's all in my head i know but i can't get it out. TrishaFrom: "nancydewolf@..." <nancydewolf@...> Sent: Wednesday, July

29, 2009 2:03:42 PMSubject: Re: Re: OT: More to Love?

The non-scale victories, being able to do more in an exercise video than you could do last time, clothing fitting better, losing inches, making progress on changing unhelpful habits, etc. are WAY more important than the numbers on the scale (that fluctuate day to day anyway). Be proud of what you've achieved so far and to heck with the scale!

Re: Re: OT: More to Love?

Trish you are doing fantastic. Look back at the last week and how many HUGE improvements you have made. You should feel really proud. Don't say you are a failure. You are still doing it:-) Keep up the wonderful strides!!!!

Hot Deals at Dell on Popular Laptops perfect for Back to School

[Guest guest]

that's what i have always done. i have never relied on a scale but for some reason now i feel i have to see those numbers to know there is a difference. it's all in my head i know but i can't get it out. TrishaFrom: "nancydewolf@..." <nancydewolf@...> Sent: Wednesday, July

29, 2009 2:03:42 PMSubject: Re: Re: OT: More to Love?

The non-scale victories, being able to do more in an exercise video than you could do last time, clothing fitting better, losing inches, making progress on changing unhelpful habits, etc. are WAY more important than the numbers on the scale (that fluctuate day to day anyway). Be proud of what you've achieved so far and to heck with the scale!

Re: Re: OT: More to Love?

Trish you are doing fantastic. Look back at the last week and how many HUGE improvements you have made. You should feel really proud. Don't say you are a failure. You are still doing it:-) Keep up the wonderful strides!!!!

Hot Deals at Dell on Popular Laptops perfect for Back to School

[Guest guest]

u make me wanna say "how do u know i can? what if i can't what if i never get to where i want to be? or what f i can but i can't stay there." u also make me wanna say "no one has every said that to me before, no one has ever believed i could be anything more then a fat lump." in saying both i still think i'm gonna struggle, this is gonna be hard. i know i can get there but keeping it isn't so easy. that why i'm here today talking to u friends b\c it didn't "take", i couldn't keep it there. and it's my fault i think it's ok i've done so good one cookie won't hurt, then two then three and befor ei know it the whole package is gone and i feel like crap. more then anything that's what i have to work on maintaining it! TrishaFrom: "nancydewolf@..." <nancydewolf@...> Sent: Wednesday, July 29, 2009 2:14:17 PMSubject: Re: Re: OT: More to Love?

Trisha,

The thing is though that you CAN have all those things...

I've got a million reasons of my own for why I didn't lose weight and keep it off for the 20 years I tried previously. Many stem from abuse, being picked on as a kid and the list goes on and on. I felt jealous of all those fit people because I wanted to be like them but didn't believe I could be. At some point you just have to decide you will be like them. At some point, you have to get rid of the "could have been" and "the should have been" and "if only someone..." excuses and make yourself what you really want to be. And you have to want it badly enough to make it happen for reasons that will keep you motivated over the long haul and through frustrations.

Mine is cancer. I'm a 5 year breast cancer survivor, diagnosed just a month after my 37th birthday with 2 kids (ages 2 & 5 at the time). Being overweight didn't cause my cancer (no one knows why, I'm negative for the genes and had few risk factors) but staying overweight wasn't helping my chances to keep it away. Every time I get away from my healthier habits I remind myself why I'm doing them. I don't want the extra helping or the mindless snacking because I'm anxious or bored as badly as I want to see my kids graduate from high school or as much as I want to be able to move easily and do whatever I want because being overweight isn't holding me back from doing them. Sometimes I don't get back into the healthy stuff as fast as I could and usually it is because I've allowed myself to get mired down in emotional muck. I pull myself free again by reminding myself what is really important. Me.

You CAN have all those things... I finally do.

Re: Re: OT: More to Love?Date: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 7:27 PM

Kassia

I am sorry you have a co worker that is so insensitive to say things like that to you. I don't understand people who feel like they have to give you their two cents worth, when you didn't even ask. Some people I know that weigh more than me like to call me 'frail' because I am thinner than them. With the weights I work out with I KNOW I am not frail:-) But it used to bother me a lot, that they would say that. I think jealousy has so much to do with the comments. I am guessing your co worker is jealous of your dedication to working out and wishes she had that kind of staying power, saying things to you in some way makes her feel better. I am sorry.

A Good Credit Score is 700 or Above. See yours in just 2 easy steps!

[Guest guest]

u make me wanna say "how do u know i can? what if i can't what if i never get to where i want to be? or what f i can but i can't stay there." u also make me wanna say "no one has every said that to me before, no one has ever believed i could be anything more then a fat lump." in saying both i still think i'm gonna struggle, this is gonna be hard. i know i can get there but keeping it isn't so easy. that why i'm here today talking to u friends b\c it didn't "take", i couldn't keep it there. and it's my fault i think it's ok i've done so good one cookie won't hurt, then two then three and befor ei know it the whole package is gone and i feel like crap. more then anything that's what i have to work on maintaining it! TrishaFrom: "nancydewolf@..." <nancydewolf@...> Sent: Wednesday, July 29, 2009 2:14:17 PMSubject: Re: Re: OT: More to Love?

Trisha,

The thing is though that you CAN have all those things...

I've got a million reasons of my own for why I didn't lose weight and keep it off for the 20 years I tried previously. Many stem from abuse, being picked on as a kid and the list goes on and on. I felt jealous of all those fit people because I wanted to be like them but didn't believe I could be. At some point you just have to decide you will be like them. At some point, you have to get rid of the "could have been" and "the should have been" and "if only someone..." excuses and make yourself what you really want to be. And you have to want it badly enough to make it happen for reasons that will keep you motivated over the long haul and through frustrations.

Mine is cancer. I'm a 5 year breast cancer survivor, diagnosed just a month after my 37th birthday with 2 kids (ages 2 & 5 at the time). Being overweight didn't cause my cancer (no one knows why, I'm negative for the genes and had few risk factors) but staying overweight wasn't helping my chances to keep it away. Every time I get away from my healthier habits I remind myself why I'm doing them. I don't want the extra helping or the mindless snacking because I'm anxious or bored as badly as I want to see my kids graduate from high school or as much as I want to be able to move easily and do whatever I want because being overweight isn't holding me back from doing them. Sometimes I don't get back into the healthy stuff as fast as I could and usually it is because I've allowed myself to get mired down in emotional muck. I pull myself free again by reminding myself what is really important. Me.

You CAN have all those things... I finally do.

Re: Re: OT: More to Love?Date: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 7:27 PM

Kassia

I am sorry you have a co worker that is so insensitive to say things like that to you. I don't understand people who feel like they have to give you their two cents worth, when you didn't even ask. Some people I know that weigh more than me like to call me 'frail' because I am thinner than them. With the weights I work out with I KNOW I am not frail:-) But it used to bother me a lot, that they would say that. I think jealousy has so much to do with the comments. I am guessing your co worker is jealous of your dedication to working out and wishes she had that kind of staying power, saying things to you in some way makes her feel better. I am sorry.

A Good Credit Score is 700 or Above. See yours in just 2 easy steps!

[Guest guest]

u've gotta point nancy and i agree but i know these two women that are extremely large women have been for as long as i've known them. they whine they can't find clothes, they whine they are lonely, don't have any enegery, can't do this job, task or w\e. and when we (friends nd family) say if u'd just lose 20 lbs then u could (yes they need to lose more then 20 lbs but it's a start). through out all of this they still believe that there are other reasons for their problems it's can't be the weigh cause they've ALWAYS been that big. they aren't making the connection that they are unhappy cause they are obese. in today's society the human race is oblivious. "i smoke 6 packs of cigerattes a day but i don't know why i can't breath, i just cleaned black mold with bleach i don't know why we're so

sick. i get four hours of sleep a night i don't know why i'm so tired, i just ate long john silvers and a gallon of ice cream i don't know why i'm over weight" ppl r stupid. and i don't use that word refering to ppl lightly. it's unkind but i fall in that catagories to stupid. TrishaFrom: "nancydewolf@..." <nancydewolf@...> Sent: Wednesday, July 29, 2009 2:14:55 PMSubject: Re:

Re: OT: More to Love?

How happy can they be if they're whining about no one dating them and they're on a show like that????

Re: OT: More to Love?> > > I agree, this has been a good "hot topic" thread!> > I am split in two. On one hand I agree with Kassia, our society is overly obsessed with other peoples' weight and maybe this show will in some way glamorize being obese? > > That said, I am in Judy's "fat and fit" category myself. I'm at 210 right now and not happy with this and taking steps to change this. I was at 170 last year. I teach Turbo Kick and can do a Cathe workout. I have slender friends who are winded and done within 10 minutes!> > I have been told by men before in tactful and sometimes not-so-tactful ways that they liked me a lot but that I was too fat for them to date. I understand, you like what you like, but it also bums me out that they supposedly like me that much and this is the one thing that stands in the way. What if I was 140 lbs, they got everything they wanted, then I got in a car accident and lost both of my legs? Would they still love me and stick around or would they split?> > I have also been blessed to have dated men who liked me just the way I was, and what a glorious feeling that is! Men preferring slender women is mostly a North American and European thing, other cultures prefer women with some meat on their bones. > > In short - thank goodness for those men out there who like heavier women and aren't afraid to defy the North American norm or buy into the size 6 and under craze!> > >

[Guest guest]

u've gotta point nancy and i agree but i know these two women that are extremely large women have been for as long as i've known them. they whine they can't find clothes, they whine they are lonely, don't have any enegery, can't do this job, task or w\e. and when we (friends nd family) say if u'd just lose 20 lbs then u could (yes they need to lose more then 20 lbs but it's a start). through out all of this they still believe that there are other reasons for their problems it's can't be the weigh cause they've ALWAYS been that big. they aren't making the connection that they are unhappy cause they are obese. in today's society the human race is oblivious. "i smoke 6 packs of cigerattes a day but i don't know why i can't breath, i just cleaned black mold with bleach i don't know why we're so

sick. i get four hours of sleep a night i don't know why i'm so tired, i just ate long john silvers and a gallon of ice cream i don't know why i'm over weight" ppl r stupid. and i don't use that word refering to ppl lightly. it's unkind but i fall in that catagories to stupid. TrishaFrom: "nancydewolf@..." <nancydewolf@...> Sent: Wednesday, July 29, 2009 2:14:55 PMSubject: Re:

Re: OT: More to Love?

How happy can they be if they're whining about no one dating them and they're on a show like that????

Re: OT: More to Love?> > > I agree, this has been a good "hot topic" thread!> > I am split in two. On one hand I agree with Kassia, our society is overly obsessed with other peoples' weight and maybe this show will in some way glamorize being obese? > > That said, I am in Judy's "fat and fit" category myself. I'm at 210 right now and not happy with this and taking steps to change this. I was at 170 last year. I teach Turbo Kick and can do a Cathe workout. I have slender friends who are winded and done within 10 minutes!> > I have been told by men before in tactful and sometimes not-so-tactful ways that they liked me a lot but that I was too fat for them to date. I understand, you like what you like, but it also bums me out that they supposedly like me that much and this is the one thing that stands in the way. What if I was 140 lbs, they got everything they wanted, then I got in a car accident and lost both of my legs? Would they still love me and stick around or would they split?> > I have also been blessed to have dated men who liked me just the way I was, and what a glorious feeling that is! Men preferring slender women is mostly a North American and European thing, other cultures prefer women with some meat on their bones. > > In short - thank goodness for those men out there who like heavier women and aren't afraid to defy the North American norm or buy into the size 6 and under craze!> > >

[Guest guest]

keep trying... :-)

Re: Re: OT: More to Love?

Trish you are doing fantastic. Look back at the last week and how many HUGE improvements you have made. You should feel really proud. Don't say you are a failure. You are still doing it:-) Keep up the wonderful strides!!!!

Hot Deals at Dell on Popular Laptops perfect for Back to School

[Guest guest]

Nothing feels better when you do a workout that USED to be hard and it just doesn't push you any more. These are accomplishments no one can take away from you. I LOVE it:-)

Hot Deals at Dell on Popular Laptops perfect for Back to School

[Guest guest]

Nothing feels better when you do a workout that USED to be hard and it just doesn't push you any more. These are accomplishments no one can take away from you. I LOVE it:-)

Hot Deals at Dell on Popular Laptops perfect for Back to School

[Guest guest]

I think everyone is afraid that they can't get to their goal and, if they actually can, then they worry that they won't be able to maintain it. For me, my key has been the support network of the WW meetings and the accountability at the scale with another person weighing me, that and knowing absolutely what I want... a healthy me. Figure out what you really want. What will keep you from eating the whole bag of cookies? What will drive you to make uncomfortable (at first) choices that will lead to better health and more comfort with your own self? No need to post that of course, just that if you have a very vivid picture of what you really want it makes it easier to stay motivated when times are tough.

Re: Re: OT: More to Love?Date: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 7:27 PM

Kassia

I am sorry you have a co worker that is so insensitive to say things like that to you. I don't understand people who feel like they have to give you their two cents worth, when you didn't even ask. Some people I know that weigh more than me like to call me 'frail' because I am thinner than them. With the weights I work out with I KNOW I am not frail:-) But it used to bother me a lot, that they would say that. I think jealousy has so much to do with the comments. I am guessing your co worker is jealous of your dedication to working out and wishes she had that kind of staying power, saying things to you in some way makes her feel better. I am sorry.

A Good Credit Score is 700 or Above. See yours in just 2 easy steps!

[Guest guest]

I think everyone is afraid that they can't get to their goal and, if they actually can, then they worry that they won't be able to maintain it. For me, my key has been the support network of the WW meetings and the accountability at the scale with another person weighing me, that and knowing absolutely what I want... a healthy me. Figure out what you really want. What will keep you from eating the whole bag of cookies? What will drive you to make uncomfortable (at first) choices that will lead to better health and more comfort with your own self? No need to post that of course, just that if you have a very vivid picture of what you really want it makes it easier to stay motivated when times are tough.

Re: Re: OT: More to Love?Date: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 7:27 PM

Kassia

I am sorry you have a co worker that is so insensitive to say things like that to you. I don't understand people who feel like they have to give you their two cents worth, when you didn't even ask. Some people I know that weigh more than me like to call me 'frail' because I am thinner than them. With the weights I work out with I KNOW I am not frail:-) But it used to bother me a lot, that they would say that. I think jealousy has so much to do with the comments. I am guessing your co worker is jealous of your dedication to working out and wishes she had that kind of staying power, saying things to you in some way makes her feel better. I am sorry.

A Good Credit Score is 700 or Above. See yours in just 2 easy steps!