Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 I know, why should we have to live in fear like this? I saw a mom with twin girls, around five, and a new baby. She saw our twins and we joked that usually twins are the LAST in the line-up. She said she must have suffered amnesia. She was in baby euphoria, clearly blissed out, a feeling I remember well (and how it came crashing down on getting our son's dx). She was cheerfully encouraging us to " keep going " and to have more kids. I looked at dh's drawn expression and thought of McCarthy saying on Larry King that she'd had her butt kicked by autism and wouldn't be having any more children. But I guess we can channel this into trying to make sure that others don't have to go through the same thing if we can help it. I saw a mom from Africa at Ikea last year. She was about seven months pregnant with twins and stopped me when I was with our kids to ask how it was having twins. After giving my usual short bit on the wonders of twins, I just blurted out, " Don't let them give you the flu shot while you're pregnant or breastfeeding. It has mercury in it. My son can't talk because of his vaccinations " . I scribbled down the website for NVIC on a scrap of paper. She wasn't unpleasantly shocked, actually seemed pretty happy to get the information, said her doc had been pushing the flu shot and she was on the verge of caving in. The shock of knowing doesn't compare to the consequences of not knowing these days. You did a great, great thing. > > My neighbor has a boy with autism (along with 2 other people on our block). > Our sons were in the same class last year. The mom told me about 5- 6 months > ago that she was pregnant, but scared that her next child would have autism > too. They are from Central America and they don¹t speak fluent English > (although she can understand me most of the time). Anyway, I asked the Dad > yesterday if they were having a boy or a girl. He said it was a girl and I > was SO happy. > > A few minutes ago at the bus stop I said to the mom ³you know that boys are > 4 times more likely to have autism?². She didn¹t know that. I just don¹t > want her stressing about the baby, because it isn¹t good for the immune > system. I also mentioned that I would make up a list for her, so she knows > what vaccines to give when. > > After I closed my door I started crying because I feel like we should NOT > have to live like this. Having a child should be a wonderful experience. > We shouldn¹t be afraid to have more children. We shouldn¹t constantly be > trying to figure out what we did wrong. She told me that she¹s been > worrying about having another child with autism since the second she knew > she was pregnant. > > She also told me that her son is calling the baby ³² for some > reason. I said, ³See, means victory- that¹s a sign that everything > is going to be ok². > > - > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 aw nice. I also worried until the ultrasound where we found out our 2nd was a girl. After that I could relax.christine <christine@...> wrote: My neighbor has a boy with autism (along with 2 other people on our block). Our sons were in the same class last year. The mom told me about 5-6 months ago that she was pregnant, but scared that her next child would have autism too. They are from Central America and they don’t speak fluent English (although she can understand me most of the time). Anyway, I asked the Dad yesterday if they were having a boy or a girl. He said it was a girl and I was SO happy.A few minutes ago at the bus stop I said to the mom “you know that boys are 4 times more likely to have autism?”. She didn’t know that. I just don’t want her stressing about the baby, because it isn’t good for the immune system. I also mentioned that I would make up a list for her, so she knows what vaccines to give when.After I closed my door I started crying because I feel like we should NOT have to live like this. Having a child should be a wonderful experience. We shouldn’t be afraid to have more children. We shouldn’t constantly be trying to figure out what we did wrong. She told me that she’s been worrying about having another child with autism since the second she knew she was pregnant.She also told me that her son is calling the baby “” for some reason. I said, “See, means victory- that’s a sign that everything is going to be ok”.- Ask a question on any topic and get answers from real people. Go to Answers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 ..I would be interested to see the list that you draw up as to which are important and when. any justification for that would be great thanks Ange Interesting exchange My neighbor has a boy with autism (along with 2 other people on our block). Our sons were in the same class last year. The mom told me about 5-6 months ago that she was pregnant, but scared that her next child would have autism too. They are from Central America and they don’t speak fluent English (although she can understand me most of the time). Anyway, I asked the Dad yesterday if they were having a boy or a girl. He said it was a girl and I was SO happy.A few minutes ago at the bus stop I said to the mom “you know that boys are 4 times more likely to have autism?”. She didn’t know that. I just don’t want her stressing about the baby, because it isn’t good for the immune system. I also mentioned that I would make up a list for her, so she knows what vaccines to give when.After I closed my door I started crying because I feel like we should NOT have to live like this. Having a child should be a wonderful experience. We shouldn’t be afraid to have more children. We shouldn’t constantly be trying to figure out what we did wrong. She told me that she’s been worrying about having another child with autism since the second she knew she was pregnant.She also told me that her son is calling the baby “” for some reason. I said, “See, means victory- that’s a sign that everything is going to be ok”.- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 not sure why y'all are relaxing...the female of my boy/girl twins is the one with autism...it still happens to the girls, too. My neighbor has a boy with autism (along with 2 other people on our block). Our sons were in the same class last year. The mom told me about 5-6 months ago that she was pregnant, but scared that her next child would have autism too. They are from Central America and they don't speak fluent English (although she can understand me most of the time). Anyway, I asked the Dad yesterday if they were having a boy or a girl. He said it was a girl and I was SO happy. > > A few minutes ago at the bus stop I said to the mom " you know that boys are 4 times more likely to have autism? " . She didn't know that. I just don't want her stressing about the baby, because it isn't good for the immune system. I also mentioned that I would make up a list for her, so she knows what vaccines to give when. > > After I closed my door I started crying because I feel like we should NOT have to live like this. Having a child should be a wonderful experience. We shouldn't be afraid to have more children. We shouldn't constantly be trying to figure out what we did wrong. She told me that she's been worrying about having another child with autism since the second she knew she was pregnant. > > She also told me that her son is calling the baby " " for some reason. I said, " See, means victory- that's a sign that everything is going to be ok " . > > - > > > > > --------------------------------- > Ask a question on any topic and get answers from real people. Go to Answers. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 Yeah, Allie is a girl with autism. Still, when I got preg after her dx, I had to say I felt a certain level of relief when we found we were having another girl. I guess it's the high level of boys, I felt slightly less chance. Probably pretty silly, but I guess we cling to what ever we can, lol. We both belong to the autism_in_girls board, it's easy to see there just how many girls are affected by autism. They (girls with autism) are all over my town, too. And we can tell ya, periods & pregnancy in girls with autism are a fearful thing! Debi > > > > aw nice. I also worried until the ultrasound where we found out our > 2nd was a girl. After that I could relax. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 I wonder how many of you have your first child with autism and never had more vs. a child further back in birth order, who did opt to have more? I know some of us have 2-3 kids with autism or more. I cannot imagine. I had an older typical child when Allie got autism, so I didn't feel it was an automatic sentence. We got pregnant semi-on purpose six months after Allie's dx. I remember the night after hubby accepted the forth positive pregnancy test in a row that I was probably pregnant. We into our bedroom and opened God's Word for proof that our baby would be okay. The Bible fell open to 2, particularly 2:25, " I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten... " That's when I knew I had to name if a girl Dinah Grace, meaning " vindicated by Grace. " She is now 5 yrs old with no autism...and never been immunized either. So I have 2 without autism and one with. I would love to say I could have more kid without worries, but that would be a lie. Of course I have other health problems and ain't a spring chick anymore myself, but I hate more than anything to know parents of kids with autism not only deal with the burden of having a child, but the sentence of their entire childbirth dreams being shot. I know Allie wouldn't be near where she is today were it not for her sisters. I for one dreamed of being a mother since I can remember. In some ways this experience has ruined my greatest dream in life. For me, it's like A Tale of Two Cities, it's been the best of times & worst of times all at once. What I hope is that my girls can have their families without what we've all gone through. Debi > > I know, why should we have to live in fear like this? I saw a mom > with twin girls, around five, and a new baby. She saw our twins and > we joked that usually twins are the LAST in the line-up. She said she > must have suffered amnesia. She was in baby euphoria, clearly blissed > out, a feeling I remember well (and how it came crashing down on > getting our son's dx). She was cheerfully encouraging us to " keep > going " and to have more kids. I looked at dh's drawn expression and > thought of McCarthy saying on Larry King that she'd had her > butt kicked by autism and wouldn't be having any more children. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 I wonder how many of you have your first child with autism and never had more vs. a child further back in birth order, who did opt to have more? I know some of us have 2-3 kids with autism or more. I cannot imagine. I had an older typical child when Allie got autism, so I didn't feel it was an automatic sentence. We got pregnant semi-on purpose six months after Allie's dx. I remember the night after hubby accepted the forth positive pregnancy test in a row that I was probably pregnant. We into our bedroom and opened God's Word for proof that our baby would be okay. The Bible fell open to 2, particularly 2:25, " I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten... " That's when I knew I had to name if a girl Dinah Grace, meaning " vindicated by Grace. " She is now 5 yrs old with no autism...and never been immunized either. So I have 2 without autism and one with. I would love to say I could have more kid without worries, but that would be a lie. Of course I have other health problems and ain't a spring chick anymore myself, but I hate more than anything to know parents of kids with autism not only deal with the burden of having a child, but the sentence of their entire childbirth dreams being shot. I know Allie wouldn't be near where she is today were it not for her sisters. I for one dreamed of being a mother since I can remember. In some ways this experience has ruined my greatest dream in life. For me, it's like A Tale of Two Cities, it's been the best of times & worst of times all at once. What I hope is that my girls can have their families without what we've all gone through. Debi > > I know, why should we have to live in fear like this? I saw a mom > with twin girls, around five, and a new baby. She saw our twins and > we joked that usually twins are the LAST in the line-up. She said she > must have suffered amnesia. She was in baby euphoria, clearly blissed > out, a feeling I remember well (and how it came crashing down on > getting our son's dx). She was cheerfully encouraging us to " keep > going " and to have more kids. I looked at dh's drawn expression and > thought of McCarthy saying on Larry King that she'd had her > butt kicked by autism and wouldn't be having any more children. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 But, the odds are much lower. Plus, I don’t want the mom to stress about it- that doesn’t help either. On 1/8/08 1:53 PM, " penelope_fam " <p.ray@...> wrote: not sure why y'all are relaxing...the female of my boy/girl twins is the one with autism...it still happens to the girls, too. My neighbor has a boy with autism (along with 2 other people on our block). Our sons were in the same class last year. The mom told me about 5-6 months ago that she was pregnant, but scared that her next child would have autism too. They are from Central America and they don't speak fluent English (although she can understand me most of the time). Anyway, I asked the Dad yesterday if they were having a boy or a girl. He said it was a girl and I was SO happy. > > A few minutes ago at the bus stop I said to the mom " you know that boys are 4 times more likely to have autism? " . She didn't know that. I just don't want her stressing about the baby, because it isn't good for the immune system. I also mentioned that I would make up a list for her, so she knows what vaccines to give when. > > After I closed my door I started crying because I feel like we should NOT have to live like this. Having a child should be a wonderful experience. We shouldn't be afraid to have more children. We shouldn't constantly be trying to figure out what we did wrong. She told me that she's been worrying about having another child with autism since the second she knew she was pregnant. > > She also told me that her son is calling the baby " " for some reason. I said, " See, means victory- that's a sign that everything is going to be ok " . > > - > > > > > --------------------------------- > Ask a question on any topic and get answers from real people. Go to Answers. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 1st boy with ASD, 2nd girl(not up to date with VACS and very spaced) and NTDebi <fightingautism@...> wrote: I wonder how many of you have your first child with autism and neverhad more vs. a child further back in birth order, who did opt to havemore? I know some of us have 2-3 kids with autism or more. I cannotimagine. I had an older typical child when Allie got autism, so Ididn't feel it was an automatic sentence. We got pregnant semi-onpurpose six months after Allie's dx. I remember the night after hubbyaccepted the forth positive pregnancy test in a row that I wasprobably pregnant. We into our bedroom and opened God's Word for proofthat our baby would be okay. The Bible fell open to 2,particularly 2:25, "I will repay you for the years the locusts haveeaten..." That's when I knew I had to name if a girl Dinah Grace,meaning "vindicated by Grace." She is now 5 yrs old with noautism...and never been immunized either. So I have 2 without autismand one with.I would love to say I could have more kid without worries, but thatwould be a lie. Of course I have other health problems and ain't aspring chick anymore myself, but I hate more than anything to knowparents of kids with autism not only deal with the burden of having achild, but the sentence of their entire childbirth dreams being shot.I know Allie wouldn't be near where she is today were it not for hersisters. I for one dreamed of being a mother since I can remember. Insome ways this experience has ruined my greatest dream in life. Forme, it's like A Tale of Two Cities, it's been the best of times & worst of times all at once.What I hope is that my girls can have their families without whatwe've all gone through. Debi>> I know, why should we have to live in fear like this? I saw a mom > with twin girls, around five, and a new baby. She saw our twins and > we joked that usually twins are the LAST in the line-up. She said she > must have suffered amnesia. She was in baby euphoria, clearly blissed > out, a feeling I remember well (and how it came crashing down on > getting our son's dx). She was cheerfully encouraging us to "keep > going" and to have more kids. I looked at dh's drawn expression and > thought of McCarthy saying on Larry King that she'd had her > butt kicked by autism and wouldn't be having any more children. > Canada Toolbar : Search from anywhere on the web and bookmark your favourite sites. Download it now! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 This discussion has come up here before...do you sit by quietly when you're around someone who's pregnant, or do you shout from the rooftops what you know about vaccines? I just see it that I was meant to cross this mother's path and possibly save her child from the hell of what we are calling autism. A person can do what they want with the information, but i find most mothers-to-be actually look relieved and want to know more. the more people we tell, the more people opt out of vaccines, the more the medical community will have to take a look at our program, no? > > > > My neighbor has a boy with autism (along with 2 other people on our > block). > > Our sons were in the same class last year. The mom told me about 5- > 6 months > > ago that she was pregnant, but scared that her next child would > have autism > > too. They are from Central America and they don¹t speak fluent > English > > (although she can understand me most of the time). Anyway, I asked > the Dad > > yesterday if they were having a boy or a girl. He said it was a > girl and I > > was SO happy. > > > > A few minutes ago at the bus stop I said to the mom ³you know that > boys are > > 4 times more likely to have autism?². She didn¹t know that. I > just don¹t > > want her stressing about the baby, because it isn¹t good for the > immune > > system. I also mentioned that I would make up a list for her, so > she knows > > what vaccines to give when. > > > > After I closed my door I started crying because I feel like we > should NOT > > have to live like this. Having a child should be a wonderful > experience. > > We shouldn¹t be afraid to have more children. We shouldn¹t > constantly be > > trying to figure out what we did wrong. She told me that she¹s been > > worrying about having another child with autism since the second > she knew > > she was pregnant. > > > > She also told me that her son is calling the baby ³² for > some > > reason. I said, ³See, means victory- that¹s a sign that > everything > > is going to be ok². > > > > - > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 This discussion has come up here before...do you sit by quietly when you're around someone who's pregnant, or do you shout from the rooftops what you know about vaccines? I just see it that I was meant to cross this mother's path and possibly save her child from the hell of what we are calling autism. A person can do what they want with the information, but i find most mothers-to-be actually look relieved and want to know more. the more people we tell, the more people opt out of vaccines, the more the medical community will have to take a look at our program, no? > > > > My neighbor has a boy with autism (along with 2 other people on our > block). > > Our sons were in the same class last year. The mom told me about 5- > 6 months > > ago that she was pregnant, but scared that her next child would > have autism > > too. They are from Central America and they don¹t speak fluent > English > > (although she can understand me most of the time). Anyway, I asked > the Dad > > yesterday if they were having a boy or a girl. He said it was a > girl and I > > was SO happy. > > > > A few minutes ago at the bus stop I said to the mom ³you know that > boys are > > 4 times more likely to have autism?². She didn¹t know that. I > just don¹t > > want her stressing about the baby, because it isn¹t good for the > immune > > system. I also mentioned that I would make up a list for her, so > she knows > > what vaccines to give when. > > > > After I closed my door I started crying because I feel like we > should NOT > > have to live like this. Having a child should be a wonderful > experience. > > We shouldn¹t be afraid to have more children. We shouldn¹t > constantly be > > trying to figure out what we did wrong. She told me that she¹s been > > worrying about having another child with autism since the second > she knew > > she was pregnant. > > > > She also told me that her son is calling the baby ³² for > some > > reason. I said, ³See, means victory- that¹s a sign that > everything > > is going to be ok². > > > > - > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 We have one child with autism and have decided not to have more. I think it would be way too stressful on the marriage, regardless of whether the child was typical, but esp. if there were issues. Not worth it. I am focusing 100% on getting my only child better. > > > > I know, why should we have to live in fear like this? I saw a mom > > with twin girls, around five, and a new baby. She saw our twins and > > we joked that usually twins are the LAST in the line-up. She said she > > must have suffered amnesia. She was in baby euphoria, clearly blissed > > out, a feeling I remember well (and how it came crashing down on > > getting our son's dx). She was cheerfully encouraging us to " keep > > going " and to have more kids. I looked at dh's drawn expression and > > thought of McCarthy saying on Larry King that she'd had her > > butt kicked by autism and wouldn't be having any more children. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 We have one child with autism and have decided not to have more. I think it would be way too stressful on the marriage, regardless of whether the child was typical, but esp. if there were issues. Not worth it. I am focusing 100% on getting my only child better. > > > > I know, why should we have to live in fear like this? I saw a mom > > with twin girls, around five, and a new baby. She saw our twins and > > we joked that usually twins are the LAST in the line-up. She said she > > must have suffered amnesia. She was in baby euphoria, clearly blissed > > out, a feeling I remember well (and how it came crashing down on > > getting our son's dx). She was cheerfully encouraging us to " keep > > going " and to have more kids. I looked at dh's drawn expression and > > thought of McCarthy saying on Larry King that she'd had her > > butt kicked by autism and wouldn't be having any more children. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 My first child- a girl, is typical, my second child- a boy, has Autism, my third, a girl (has only has had vitamin K vaccine at birth) is also typical. I am pregnant now and don’t know what I am having. My son with Autism has been blessing in disguise for me and my family. We have learned acceptance, patience and are even closer to God. Although it would be challenging if our fourth child has an ASD, we are prepared to take that risk and care for all our children. From: EOHarm [mailto:EOHarm ] On Behalf Of Debi Sent: Tuesday, January 08, 2008 1:31 PM EOHarm Subject: Re: Interesting exchange I wonder how many of you have your first child with autism and never had more vs. a child further back in birth order, who did opt to have more? I know some of us have 2-3 kids with autism or more. I cannot imagine. I had an older typical child when Allie got autism, so I didn't feel it was an automatic sentence. We got pregnant semi-on purpose six months after Allie's dx. I remember the night after hubby accepted the forth positive pregnancy test in a row that I was probably pregnant. We into our bedroom and opened God's Word for proof that our baby would be okay. The Bible fell open to 2, particularly 2:25, " I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten... " That's when I knew I had to name if a girl Dinah Grace, meaning " vindicated by Grace. " She is now 5 yrs old with no autism...and never been immunized either. So I have 2 without autism and one with. I would love to say I could have more kid without worries, but that would be a lie. Of course I have other health problems and ain't a spring chick anymore myself, but I hate more than anything to know parents of kids with autism not only deal with the burden of having a child, but the sentence of their entire childbirth dreams being shot. I know Allie wouldn't be near where she is today were it not for her sisters. I for one dreamed of being a mother since I can remember. In some ways this experience has ruined my greatest dream in life. For me, it's like A Tale of Two Cities, it's been the best of times & worst of times all at once. What I hope is that my girls can have their families without what we've all gone through. Debi > > I know, why should we have to live in fear like this? I saw a mom > with twin girls, around five, and a new baby. She saw our twins and > we joked that usually twins are the LAST in the line-up. She said she > must have suffered amnesia. She was in baby euphoria, clearly blissed > out, a feeling I remember well (and how it came crashing down on > getting our son's dx). She was cheerfully encouraging us to " keep > going " and to have more kids. I looked at dh's drawn expression and > thought of McCarthy saying on Larry King that she'd had her > butt kicked by autism and wouldn't be having any more children. > ______________________________________________________________________ This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci.com. ______________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________ This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci.com. ______________________________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 I tell pregnant women and mothers of young children about vaccines all the time. However, if I see that they are getting offended then I apologize and back off. From: EOHarm [mailto:EOHarm ] On Behalf Of kimsense Sent: Tuesday, January 08, 2008 2:59 PM EOHarm Subject: Re: Interesting exchange This discussion has come up here before...do you sit by quietly when you're around someone who's pregnant, or do you shout from the rooftops what you know about vaccines? I just see it that I was meant to cross this mother's path and possibly save her child from the hell of what we are calling autism. A person can do what they want with the information, but i find most mothers-to-be actually look relieved and want to know more. the more people we tell, the more people opt out of vaccines, the more the medical community will have to take a look at our program, no? > > > > My neighbor has a boy with autism (along with 2 other people on our > block). > > Our sons were in the same class last year. The mom told me about 5- > 6 months > > ago that she was pregnant, but scared that her next child would > have autism > > too. They are from Central America and they don¹t speak fluent > English > > (although she can understand me most of the time). Anyway, I asked > the Dad > > yesterday if they were having a boy or a girl. He said it was a > girl and I > > was SO happy. > > > > A few minutes ago at the bus stop I said to the mom ³you know that > boys are > > 4 times more likely to have autism?². She didn¹t know that. I > just don¹t > > want her stressing about the baby, because it isn¹t good for the > immune > > system. I also mentioned that I would make up a list for her, so > she knows > > what vaccines to give when. > > > > After I closed my door I started crying because I feel like we > should NOT > > have to live like this. Having a child should be a wonderful > experience. > > We shouldn¹t be afraid to have more children. We shouldn¹t > constantly be > > trying to figure out what we did wrong. She told me that she¹s been > > worrying about having another child with autism since the second > she knew > > she was pregnant. > > > > She also told me that her son is calling the baby ³² for > some > > reason. I said, ³See, means victory- that¹s a sign that > everything > > is going to be ok². > > > > - > > > ______________________________________________________________________ This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci.com. ______________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________ This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci.com. ______________________________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 I will never forget the very valuable advice a good friend gave me on this very topic. In her words, Dr. Stanley Monteith said it best - " Once you recognize what is happening, you have a moral obligation to become involved. " > > > > > > My neighbor has a boy with autism (along with 2 other people on our > > block). > > > Our sons were in the same class last year. The mom told me about 5- > > 6 months > > > ago that she was pregnant, but scared that her next child would > > have autism > > > too. They are from Central America and they don¹t speak fluent > > English > > > (although she can understand me most of the time). Anyway, I asked > > the Dad > > > yesterday if they were having a boy or a girl. He said it was a > > girl and I > > > was SO happy. > > > > > > A few minutes ago at the bus stop I said to the mom ³you know that > > boys are > > > 4 times more likely to have autism?². She didn¹t know that. I > > just don¹t > > > want her stressing about the baby, because it isn¹t good for the > > immune > > > system. I also mentioned that I would make up a list for her, so > > she knows > > > what vaccines to give when. > > > > > > After I closed my door I started crying because I feel like we > > should NOT > > > have to live like this. Having a child should be a wonderful > > experience. > > > We shouldn¹t be afraid to have more children. We shouldn¹t > > constantly be > > > trying to figure out what we did wrong. She told me that she¹s been > > > worrying about having another child with autism since the second > > she knew > > > she was pregnant. > > > > > > She also told me that her son is calling the baby ³² for > > some > > > reason. I said, ³See, means victory- that¹s a sign that > > everything > > > is going to be ok². > > > > > > - > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 I would LOVE to have more - no sarcasm. I told my husband I'd take 4 more like our son - severe. Found out during my c-section that I probably can't have kids, CGF > > I wonder how many of you have your first child with autism and never > had more vs. a child further back in birth order, who did opt to have > more? ... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2008 Report Share Posted January 8, 2008 I have four. Boy, 15, ADHD Girl, 5, NT (though I think she may be a bit bi-polar) Boy, 4, ASD Girl, 11 months, getting EI. I think she'll be PDD or ASD, also. She's not talking anywhere near as well as my older DD (who had 50 words at her 15-month well visit) - only says hi there, mama, dada - or pointing yet, and hasn't ever had great eye contact. Except for Vit. K (not a vaccine) at birth, she has had no vaccines or shots of any kind. The rest of my kids had everything as scheduled except the middle two won't get the 2nd MMR or anything after - we'll do titers instead. Given the baby is still breastfed, allergen-free and I have the most hypoallergenic diet there is, and she hasn't had vaccines, and she's still showing signs of an ASD - I can't say I'm 100% convinced the vaxes have anything to do with it. One thing is for certain - I HATE not knowing. So - we still had more post-diagnosis, but won't do it again because two kids on the spectrum is a lot - heck, for most people 4 NT kids is a lot! - but also because my pregnancies suck and I can't go through extended visits to antepartum with the little ones at home. After I closed my door I started crying because I feel like we should NOT > have to live like this. Having a child should be a wonderful experience. > We shouldn¹t be afraid to have more children. We shouldn¹t constantly be > trying to figure out what we did wrong. She told me that she¹s been > worrying about having another child with autism since the second she knew > she was pregnant. > > - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 9, 2008 Report Share Posted January 9, 2008 Pregnancy-- prior to the flu shot during pregnancy-- is the only window in which most women will even listen to information on vaccines. The next window is after their child is diagnosed. In between those windows, once the vaccinations have started, people typically go into denial. It's human nature: you're telling someone to close the gate after the horses have already gotten out. I warn unilaterally, open window or not. I warn pregnant women about HepB, about flu shots, I give out NVIC's url. I warn women with infants about infant flu shots or getting flu shots while breastfeeding. If they're interested, I go on about other vaccinations. I warn college girls about amassing a body burden. Our babysitter took her dad to her last ped visit and he stood by to make sure she didn't get any mercury in the required college shots. I couldn't get her to say no to all of them, but she did at least refuse the flu shot and her dad ordered the hg-free menningococcal. Her dad is really imposing and told the little ped " We don't want her having a kid with autism " when asked why hg-free. > > > > > > My neighbor has a boy with autism (along with 2 other people on our > > block). > > > Our sons were in the same class last year. The mom told me about 5- > > 6 months > > > ago that she was pregnant, but scared that her next child would > > have autism > > > too. They are from Central America and they don¹t speak fluent > > English > > > (although she can understand me most of the time). Anyway, I asked > > the Dad > > > yesterday if they were having a boy or a girl. He said it was a > > girl and I > > > was SO happy. > > > > > > A few minutes ago at the bus stop I said to the mom ³you know that > > boys are > > > 4 times more likely to have autism?². She didn¹t know that. I > > just don¹t > > > want her stressing about the baby, because it isn¹t good for the > > immune > > > system. I also mentioned that I would make up a list for her, so > > she knows > > > what vaccines to give when. > > > > > > After I closed my door I started crying because I feel like we > > should NOT > > > have to live like this. Having a child should be a wonderful > > experience. > > > We shouldn¹t be afraid to have more children. We shouldn¹t > > constantly be > > > trying to figure out what we did wrong. She told me that she¹s been > > > worrying about having another child with autism since the second > > she knew > > > she was pregnant. > > > > > > She also told me that her son is calling the baby ³² for > > some > > > reason. I said, ³See, means victory- that¹s a sign that > > everything > > > is going to be ok². > > > > > > - > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 9, 2008 Report Share Posted January 9, 2008 I usually find a way to mention it in a non-accusatory way. Actually, just about any pregnant woman I know has come up to me to ask questions. It's been my experience those who care will ask or notice small hints, those who are convinced there's no problem will not be convinced no matter what I say/do. I think I've shared a pregnant friend who has 11 other pregnant friends have told me they are all worried and I don't think any of them are going to immunize, if they do it will be very selective. I've also found that telling them they could skip some, like don't do hepB & wait until the child is older, then do one at a time only when healthy, etc. I've found this to be the most relaxing to pregnant moms because they don't wanna be around an anti-vaccinating nut as much as they want support to do the right thing. I guess it's sorta like planting the seed to make 'em think it was their idea all along? Debi > > This discussion has come up here before...do you sit by quietly when > you're around someone who's pregnant, or do you shout from the > rooftops what you know about vaccines? I just see it that I was meant > to cross this mother's path and possibly save her child from the hell > of what we are calling autism. A person can do what they want with > the information, but i find most mothers-to-be actually look relieved > and want to know more. the more people we tell, the more people opt > out of vaccines, the more the medical community will have to take a > look at our program, no? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 9, 2008 Report Share Posted January 9, 2008 I had friends who were anti-vaccine before I ever had kids. I used to stand with the ped & make fun of them while he shot up my kids. Just goes to show information isn't always enough. I've since to my closest friend how much I wish I would have listened to her, she might have saved my daughter's life if I had only been open to it. That's why I say for some people it takes a personal experience, it sure did for me. Debi > > I will never forget the very valuable advice a good friend gave me on > this very topic. In her words, Dr. Stanley Monteith said it best - > " Once you recognize what is happening, you have a moral obligation > to become involved. " > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 9, 2008 Report Share Posted January 9, 2008 Or in the words of the late, great Dr. Luther Knig Jr., " In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but rather the silence of or friends " . Re: Interesting exchange Posted by: " jenna.keefe " jkeefe@... jenna.keefe Tue Jan 8, 2008 1:18 pm (PST) I will never forget the very valuable advice a good friend gave me on this very topic. In her words, Dr. Stanley Monteith said it best - " Once you recognize what is happening, you have a moral obligation to become involved. " ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Mobile. Try it now. http://mobile./;_ylt=Ahu06i62sR8HDtDypao8Wcj9tAcJ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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