Guest guest Posted March 26, 2002 Report Share Posted March 26, 2002 I had to reply to this. I understand your need to vent and I understand your feelings. I went through a terrible time at my church at Christmas time when my son (Apraxia, good possibility he is also autistic) was unable to participate like all the other kids in the Christmas program. People have often commented on how good my son is at church. He loves church---so much that he imitates the pastor and the past few months repeats everything the pastor says. SOmetimes it is cute and people chuckle but lately we have also seebn some frowns--maybe because he is not always that quiet little boy people are used to. I have started to not want to go to church anymore as we have also experienced a few tantrums in church the past few weeks. I feel like everyone is staring and thinking- " why do those parents tolerate that behavior?? " They just dont realize we dont always know what to do. Thank you for letting me vent, as well. > > Hello to All.. Just wanted to vent a little. Of all > places where acceptance should be a given.. your > church family. We went to church and I thought was one > of the better visits.. Our son is Autistic & > non-verbal(verbal apraxia) he was good and his > vocalizations were few.. but they did occur. I keep > getting looks and people who we call " Have breathing > Problems " .. you know those sounds when someone takes a > DEEP breathe! My oldest who is nine is starting to > notice more peoples expressions, looks and sounds > towards her brother. I have told her that I do not > have time for Human Ignorance.. We as time goes on > will have to try to educate these humans who do not > understand what Autism is.. The ASA has cards that > say.. Are you puzzled by my childs behavior? and > explain a little to what Autism is. I did not have any > on hand to give out at church.. and boy did I want to > give them out! I was upset to see my daughter go threw > this.. emotional tug-of-war. Being embarrassed, > feeling guilty of the embarrassment and then being mad > at all around her. I tell her that their is a reason > why god made who he is. He made you the person > you are.. and your sister the person she is. I would > never wish to change the three most special people in > my life and thank god every day for giving you, your > sister and your brother to me. Okay.. I need a tissue. > Thanks for letting me vent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 26, 2002 Report Share Posted March 26, 2002 Thanks ! I was so upset that I called our Parish Priest and explained what had happen. He was very upset and agreed fully with me that this should not happen in church. Since our church is small.. a Children's Mass would not be possible(I asked) but it might be something for you to look into at your church. I also suggested to our Priest that he be an advocate of sorts... and mentioned that a good way to address this would be in his sermon to the congregation. He agreed! I am in the process of getting him information regarding Autism. Thanks Again for listening and I hope things get better for you. > I had to reply to this. I understand your need to > vent and I understand > your feelings. I went through a terrible time at my > church at Christmas > time when my son (Apraxia, good possibility he is > also autistic) was unable > to participate like all the other kids in the > Christmas program. People have > often commented on how good my son is at church. He > loves church---so much > that he imitates the pastor and the past few months > repeats everything the > pastor says. SOmetimes it is cute and people > chuckle but lately we have > also seebn some frowns--maybe because he is not > always that quiet little boy > people are used to. I have started to not want to > go to church anymore as > we have also experienced a few tantrums in church > the past few weeks. I > feel like everyone is staring and thinking- " why do > those parents tolerate > that behavior?? " They just dont realize we dont > always know what to do. > > Thank you for letting me vent, as well. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 27, 2002 Report Share Posted March 27, 2002 Wow, do I know what you mean!!! My heart goes out to you and your family. Hopefully your nine year old will grow up with compassion and tolerance for others - something which seems to have been forgotten by many other people. Been there stacey Hello to All.. Just wanted to vent a little. Of all places where acceptance should be a given.. your church family. We went to church and I thought was one of the better visits.. Our son is Autistic & non-verbal(verbal apraxia) he was good and his vocalizations were few.. but they did occur. I keep getting looks and people who we call " Have breathing Problems " .. you know those sounds when someone takes a DEEP breathe! My oldest who is nine is starting to notice more peoples expressions, looks and sounds towards her brother. I have told her that I do not have time for Human Ignorance.. We as time goes on will have to try to educate these humans who do not understand what Autism is.. The ASA has cards that say.. Are you puzzled by my childs behavior? and explain a little to what Autism is. I did not have any on hand to give out at church.. and boy did I want to give them out! I was upset to see my daughter go threw this.. emotional tug-of-war. Being embarrassed, feeling guilty of the embarrassment and then being mad at all around her. I tell her that their is a reason why god made who he is. He made you the person you are.. and your sister the person she is. I would never wish to change the three most special people in my life and thank god every day for giving you, your sister and your brother to me. Okay.. I need a tissue. Thanks for letting me vent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 27, 2002 Report Share Posted March 27, 2002 Hi ! First, I'm not even going to bore you with my sermon on our church experience. Lets just say the church is a quieter place for ignorant people. Now for my story. Like you, I always worry about how my other children feel when their brother is acting out in public, but I now know he is also affected by the stares. Several years ago we were in the wheelchair area of the baseball stadium and was having an exceptionally difficult time of adjusting. A woman a couple of rows up just had to keep turning around everytime he made any noise. He wanted a banana and as soon as I gave it to him he hit the woman in the back of the neck with it. I had no idea that he was aware of her until that moment. Gloria Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 27, 2002 Report Share Posted March 27, 2002 Hi Gloria, Thanks for your story.. > Hi ! > > First, I'm not even going to bore you with my sermon > on our church experience. Lets just say the church > is a quieter place for ignorant people. > > Now for my story. Like you, I always worry about > how my other children feel when their brother is > acting out in public, but I now know he is also > affected by the stares. Several years ago we were > in the wheelchair area of the baseball stadium and > was having an exceptionally difficult time > of adjusting. A woman a couple of rows up just had > to keep turning around everytime he made any noise. > He wanted a banana and as soon as I gave it to him > he hit the woman in the back of the neck with it. > I had no idea that he was aware of her until that > moment. Gloria Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 28, 2002 Report Share Posted March 28, 2002 I just had to respond.Some of the worst examples of " Christianity " are found at church.Before my son was dx with apraxia and sensory integration issues he had a great deal of behavior issues that went with this because as I found out was not only due to frustration but his sensory issues.This was before he was wasn't even 2 and a lot of children have behavior issues that don't have problems.The point is they had only problems with him and no one else. And of course his teacher,who really wasn't a teacher a Mom like me used to " yell " at him. Not only is this not appropriate when working with kids,he was in the Mother's Day Out program,but she had a son who was autistic so mine was no biggie.Anyway I was so mad!!! Needless to say I took him out of there and put him in another program where he had no problems.Imagine that? Sometimes I think it is the people working with our kids that are the problem and not our kids.I just had to throw my two cents in and tell you I and others here understand.Good Luck.Gretchen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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