Re: Yee Gads!!!

March 29, 2000

galofgo-@... wrote:

original article:tae-bo_on/?start=15959

> Some of this is stemming from a feeling of not knowing what I am. I

was always very involved with band, but was not talented enought to

continue professionally as a flutist. I've always loved singing..but

just hav an ok voice. etc. I love the fine arts and want to have a

career in the fine arts. Politics is just my hobby (for now), but it

doesn't move me the same way performing does. I fell like I have let

to much of my favorite parts of me slip away and that I might not get

them back again, because my age and body will limit me. I know I can

overcome it, but again, when the depression kicks in so does the

neurosis and self-criticism.

>

,

I can totally relate to this feeling. For the longest time, I was

depressed because I felt like I should be doing something " more " with

my life. I had no idea what I wanted to do. There were too many

options for me to limit myself to just one and so I jumped around a

lot...did some waitressing and such...only had that one job that was

actually in the field I wanted to work in. I had tons of ideas, but

things just never seemed to work out for me professionally (some of

that bad timing, some of it lack of motivation on my part, some of it

just not having any idea what I wanted to do). It got me down for a

really long time. I felt I was a failure because I didn't have it all

figured out by age 25. I'm not quite sure when I got over that. I

guess some of it was getting older and realizing that it really wasn't

all that important to have it " all figured out " ...some of it was

finding someone who loved me for who I was....some of it was just

accepting that I am where I am right now for a reason and that it will

all work out when it's supposed to work out. I'm a mother now and

that's enough for me right now. At some point in the future, I'm sure

I'll start doing something else and it's ok that it's taken me 30 years

(or more) to find what it is I'm meant to do....because when I actually

find it, I'll know it and I'll have that much more life experience

behind me to really be able to help some people. What I'm trying to

say is don't stress out about not having it all figured out yet. You

are about to move and there will be new opportunities for you....the

dream job or fulfilling your passion might be right around the corner.

It's hard not to get depressed when you think there is something out

there that you were meant to be doing and you're not doing it....but,

if it's meant to be, then you'll get your chance to shine. Reading

your message made me go find one of my favorite songs because one of

the lyrics applied to this. I love this song...it's called

" Everybody's free to wear sunscreen " and it's done by Baz Luhrmann.

All he does is talk while music is playing in the background...some of

you might have heard it. I'm going to post all the lyrics in a

different message because I think there's something for everyone. But

the ones that apply to you are:

" Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your

life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they

wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40 year

old's I know, still don't "

So, try not to get too stressed out about it. You'll figure it out

eventually and you'll find that things happen for a reason. The

important thing is not to let it depress you in the meantime...I know

this is so easy to say and much harder to follow, but I speak from

experience and I know what it's like to feel like you are not doing

what you love and what you were meant to be doing. Just know that if

you want it bad enough, you have the ability to make it happen and you

can accomplish anything you want to accomplish. Keep your dreams

inside of you and one day you will be able to make them a reality

March 29, 2000