Re: Iv'e been reported to SS!!!!!

August 24, 2010

Oh God Vicky, that's a breach of confidentiality from SS to the bitch next door I don;t know what else to say but I know how it feels having been there myself, except it was school not neighbours

Mandi x

In a message dated 24/08/2010 12:07:30 GMT Daylight Time, MaddiganV@... writes:

UNBELIEVABLEOur next door neighbour has phoned SS and complained that the VB therapists are possibly abusing , reported lots of shouting.The background to this is we live in fairly posh road which is mainly families, been here 10 yrs get on with everyone as much as any of us mix.These two OAP's moved in a few months ago and have done nothing but complain since, are we going to grow our hedge too high? Music too loud in the garden [it isn't] etc.We are detached so they don't hear any indoor noise, this is all about the garden.The therapists are doing pretend angry with , because it is highly motivating, they do talk loudly also because he just doesn't register quiet stuff, there is lots of jumping on the trampoline, laughter etc.Anyway because there has been this complaint SS want to see the video's of 's therapy.I just lost it and went straight next door and have just had an enormous face off with the old cow and her husband, what really upsets me even more is that SS have informed them is disabled which is none of their bloody business, they are now referring to "carers" which the therapists obviously aren't. How much of our business are these people going to be allowed to know because I strongly protect my childrens privacy and deeply resent being investigated on child protection issues when I devote my life to my kids.I just can't sit still since the phone call this morning, totally out of my mind ripping about this.Vicky

August 24, 2010

Oh Vicky, this is terrible, i had an incident a few years back when i was busting my a*se off working two jobs, morning and evening and waiting for Harry to be formally diagnosed, my neighbours complained to the police that my daughter was abusive to them, they can round and questioned my daughter without me being present (i was at work). I went bloody mad too, torn a strip off the policemen when i got home (i had to go to the station) i demanded what ever happened to innocent until proven guilty (my daughter was in tears saying she hadn't done anything) the policeman told me that didn't exist, i then had to take it all into my own hands and marched my children round to the neighbours house (they have special needs too) I was then told by my neighbour that it wasn't my child and it was a case of mistaken identity, i was bloody livid though, so i know exactly how you feel.

Perhaps you can get your (narrow minded nieghbour) to sit in on a session, i hate people who judge or jump to the wrong conclusion before they have all the facts in hand, my family are the worst for it.

Good luck

x

Autism Treatment From: MaddiganV@...Date: Tue, 24 Aug 2010 11:02:00 +0000Subject: Iv'e been reported to SS!!!!!

UNBELIEVABLEOur next door neighbour has phoned SS and complained that the VB therapists are possibly abusing , reported lots of shouting.The background to this is we live in fairly posh road which is mainly families, been here 10 yrs get on with everyone as much as any of us mix.These two OAP's moved in a few months ago and have done nothing but complain since, are we going to grow our hedge too high? Music too loud in the garden [it isn't] etc.We are detached so they don't hear any indoor noise, this is all about the garden.The therapists are doing pretend angry with , because it is highly motivating, they do talk loudly also because he just doesn't register quiet stuff, there is lots of jumping on the trampoline, laughter etc.Anyway because there has been this complaint SS want to see the video's of 's therapy.I just lost it and went straight next door and have just had an enormous face off with the old cow and her husband, what really upsets me even more is that SS have informed them is disabled which is none of their bloody business, they are now referring to "carers" which the therapists obviously aren't. How much of our business are these people going to be allowed to know because I strongly protect my childrens privacy and deeply resent being investigated on child protection issues when I devote my life to my kids.I just can't sit still since the phone call this morning, totally out of my mind ripping about this.Vicky

August 24, 2010

Hi Vicky

I get how hard it is to have people who don't understand a situation do things which are not helpful.

We have a press which tells us about all the bad things in the world, and I guess people are highly tuned to hot buttons.. which lead to irrational complex equivalents.. So for these oldtimers... shouting must equal a risky situaion which needs reporting. which is simply not the case here. We know from this ABE group how incredibly devoted you are to your boys.

Sometimes we have to help people understand why our children need and do things in their unique way. I am sure that even though they seriously got it wrong, your neighbours acted in a way which they thought was helpful. and that if they really understood the situation they would be mortified by their actions. I believe that part of my role with Tatijana is also to educate the people around us so that they are more accepting of her too and the knowledge pool within society grows... which long term gives our babes a better chance of being given opportunities in life and of being more integrated into society.

Vicky you have a group of wonderful people on this group who have journeyed with you.. your friends, and what really matters in life is friends... If we asked the group what they knew of you.. I believe they would all support you and say how wonderfully you dedicate you life to your boys and how positively they have benefitted by it.

It is sad when there remains such an ignorance gap about our children's special needs within society.. If only we could find more creative and inventive ways of spreading the message about things like autism including the very inventive ways that have to be uncovered to help this special part of society.

Hold your head high Vicky

Tracey

On Tue, Aug 24, 2010 at 12:02 PM, veronicamadigan <MaddiganV@...> wrote:

UNBELIEVABLEOur next door neighbour has phoned SS and complained that the VB therapists are possibly abusing , reported lots of shouting.The background to this is we live in fairly posh road which is mainly families, been here 10 yrs get on with everyone as much as any of us mix.

These two OAP's moved in a few months ago and have done nothing but complain since, are we going to grow our hedge too high? Music too loud in the garden [it isn't] etc.We are detached so they don't hear any indoor noise, this is all about the garden.

The therapists are doing pretend angry with , because it is highly motivating, they do talk loudly also because he just doesn't register quiet stuff, there is lots of jumping on the trampoline, laughter etc.Anyway because there has been this complaint SS want to see the video's of 's therapy.

I just lost it and went straight next door and have just had an enormous face off with the old cow and her husband, what really upsets me even more is that SS have informed them is disabled which is none of their bloody business, they are now referring to " carers " which the therapists obviously aren't. How much of our business are these people going to be allowed to know because I strongly protect my childrens privacy and deeply resent being investigated on child protection issues when I devote my life to my kids.

I just can't sit still since the phone call this morning, totally out of my mind ripping about this.Vicky

August 24, 2010

Oh, god. I just don't understand it, Vicky. I think that it is a breach of confidentiality as well that they were informed of private information about your child. I know of someone near us that had a similar experience and it was put aside pretty quickly by SS, I can only hope that you have a similar experience. So sorry this has happened.

Darla xxOn 24 August 2010 12:02, veronicamadigan <MaddiganV@...> wrote:

UNBELIEVABLE

Our next door neighbour has phoned SS and complained that the VB therapists are possibly abusing , reported lots of shouting.

The background to this is we live in fairly posh road which is mainly families, been here 10 yrs get on with everyone as much as any of us mix.

These two OAP's moved in a few months ago and have done nothing but complain since, are we going to grow our hedge too high? Music too loud in the garden [it isn't] etc.

We are detached so they don't hear any indoor noise, this is all about the garden.

The therapists are doing pretend angry with , because it is highly motivating, they do talk loudly also because he just doesn't register quiet stuff, there is lots of jumping on the trampoline, laughter etc.

Anyway because there has been this complaint SS want to see the video's of 's therapy.

I just lost it and went straight next door and have just had an enormous face off with the old cow and her husband, what really upsets me even more is that SS have informed them is disabled which is none of their bloody business, they are now referring to " carers " which the therapists obviously aren't. How much of our business are these people going to be allowed to know because I strongly protect my childrens privacy and deeply resent being investigated on child protection issues when I devote my life to my kids.

I just can't sit still since the phone call this morning, totally out of my mind ripping about this.

Vicky

August 24, 2010

T

On 24/08/2010 13:33, Darla wrote:

Oh, god. I just don't understand it, Vicky. I think that it is a

breach of confidentiality as well that they were informed of private

information about your child. I know of someone near us that had a

similar experience and it was put aside pretty quickly by SS, I can

only hope that you have a similar experience. So sorry this has

happened.

Darla xx

On 24 August 2010 12:02, veronicamadigan <MaddiganV@...>

wrote:

UNBELIEVABLE

Our next door neighbour has phoned SS and complained that the VB

therapists are possibly abusing , reported lots of shouting.

The background to this is we live in fairly posh road which is mainly

families, been here 10 yrs get on with everyone as much as any of us

mix.

These two OAP's moved in a few months ago and have done nothing but

complain since, are we going to grow our hedge too high? Music too loud

in the garden [it isn't] etc.

We are detached so they don't hear any indoor noise, this is all about

the garden.

The therapists are doing pretend angry with , because it is highly

motivating, they do talk loudly also because he just doesn't register

quiet stuff, there is lots of jumping on the trampoline, laughter etc.

Anyway because there has been this complaint SS want to see the video's

of 's therapy.

I just lost it and went straight next door and have just had an

enormous face off with the old cow and her husband, what really upsets

me even more is that SS have informed them is disabled which is

none of their bloody business, they are now referring to "carers" which

the therapists obviously aren't. How much of our business are these

people going to be allowed to know because I strongly protect my

childrens privacy and deeply resent being investigated on child

protection issues when I devote my life to my kids.

I just can't sit still since the phone call this morning, totally out

of my mind ripping about this.

Vicky

August 24, 2010

Easier said than done Vicky but try not to waste any more energy being angry

/hurt , they just don't understand , they don't know autism , they don't know S,

they don't live it.Stay calm, you(it could be anyone of us)haven't done anything

wrong.

When J was younger I used to see it as my job/mission to educate the public but

now see that its impossible and just concentrate on " educating " only those

people who my son sees frequently. I would say don't worry about strangers but

neighbours are a different story. You could ask them if they would like to know

more about S... explain how far S has come and thats all down to you. You are

known to the SS already via the direct payment scheme. Remember in the past

most kids like ours were in residential placements and rarely seen by the

public.

So sorry you have to go through this

Nina xx

>

> > stuff, there is lots of jumping on the trampoline, laughter etc.

> > Anyway because there has been this complaint SS want to see the video's of

> > 's therapy.

> > I just lost it and went straight next door and have just had an enormous

> > face off with the old cow and her husband, what really upsets me even more

> > is that SS have informed them is disabled which is none of their bloody

> > business, they are now referring to " carers " which the therapists obviously

> > aren't. How much of our business are these people going to be allowed to

> > know because I strongly protect my childrens privacy and deeply resent being

> > investigated on child protection issues when I devote my life to my kids.

> > I just can't sit still since the phone call this morning, totally out of my

> > mind ripping about this.

> > Vicky

> >

>

August 24, 2010

Interesting you say that, our boys bedrooms were built on because of 's stripping off antics when he was younger and now face the back of the house. They had no blinds for 5yrs because would pull them down, anyways fast foreward to these numpty's moving in we had to put blinds up because they would put their garden chairs facing our house with their back to their own garden and sit and look up at the boys bedrooms! When the blinds went up they moved their chairs to a more normal spot in their garden.

Vicky In a message dated 24/08/2010 15:45:47 GMT Daylight Time, peter_2_@... writes:

Phone the police and say you suspect them of being pedophials due to constant staring, or even better if you can get them to strike you, you can get them arrested and locked up for a few hours

August 24, 2010

Interesting you say that, our boys bedrooms were built on because of 's stripping off antics when he was younger and now face the back of the house. They had no blinds for 5yrs because would pull them down, anyways fast foreward to these numpty's moving in we had to put blinds up because they would put their garden chairs facing our house with their back to their own garden and sit and look up at the boys bedrooms! When the blinds went up they moved their chairs to a more normal spot in their garden.

Vicky In a message dated 24/08/2010 15:45:47 GMT Daylight Time, peter_2_@... writes:

Phone the police and say you suspect them of being pedophials due to constant staring, or even better if you can get them to strike you, you can get them arrested and locked up for a few hours

August 24, 2010

Vicky - all I can say is damn lucky they are old!!! I have had to refrain many a time from giving someone a slap for their own pure ignorance and have decided not to waste my time or energy even explaining our situation to people. Not worth your head space or breath. However I certainly would take up the breach of confidentiality with SS. Deep breath Marina xx

August 24, 2010

Thanks everyone for the support, thing is I am more likely to tear her head off

than explain autism to her, I come from the school of thought that my sons

business is exactly that, his business and I respect and guard his privacy.

I have phoned SS back and it turns out that the neighbour in one of her calls

[so she has been on to them more than once] told them that was autistic,

therefore she knew she was reporting on a disabled child who she thought had

carers and parents at home, obviously her prying didn't lead her to know it is

actually therapy time and not carers.

She would have been able to hear him laughing and whooping with the trampoline

activities etc, this has been done out of spite because they should have moved

to a retirement village and now expect us all to tip toe around them!

She clearly has been asking round the neighbourhood about us and I really feel

that being looked into under child protection laws by SS to satisfy this

geriatric busy body is unacceptable, I want to know what I can do as regards

harrassment.

SS asked her how she got the particular number she phoned because it is not the

standard number, she refused to say.

I hear what you are all saying, but I want blood!

Vicky

>

> Vicky - all I can say is damn lucky they are old!!! I have had to refrain

> many a time from giving someone a slap for their own pure ignorance and have

> decided not to waste my time or energy even explaining our situation to

> people. Not worth your head space or breath. However I certainly would

> take up the breach of confidentiality with SS. Deep breath Marina xx

>

August 24, 2010

Thanks everyone for the support, thing is I am more likely to tear her head off

than explain autism to her, I come from the school of thought that my sons

business is exactly that, his business and I respect and guard his privacy.

I have phoned SS back and it turns out that the neighbour in one of her calls

[so she has been on to them more than once] told them that was autistic,

therefore she knew she was reporting on a disabled child who she thought had

carers and parents at home, obviously her prying didn't lead her to know it is

actually therapy time and not carers.

She would have been able to hear him laughing and whooping with the trampoline

activities etc, this has been done out of spite because they should have moved

to a retirement village and now expect us all to tip toe around them!

She clearly has been asking round the neighbourhood about us and I really feel

that being looked into under child protection laws by SS to satisfy this

geriatric busy body is unacceptable, I want to know what I can do as regards

harrassment.

SS asked her how she got the particular number she phoned because it is not the

standard number, she refused to say.

I hear what you are all saying, but I want blood!

Vicky

>

> Vicky - all I can say is damn lucky they are old!!! I have had to refrain

> many a time from giving someone a slap for their own pure ignorance and have

> decided not to waste my time or energy even explaining our situation to

> people. Not worth your head space or breath. However I certainly would

> take up the breach of confidentiality with SS. Deep breath Marina xx

>

August 24, 2010

Bloody hell, is it a crime now for kids to laugh & whoop in their own garden, some people should get a life! Makes my blood boil to, don't blame you for wanting blood, id be the same.

xx

Autism Treatment From: MaddiganV@...Date: Tue, 24 Aug 2010 14:16:11 +0000Subject: Re: Iv'e been reported to SS!!!!!

Thanks everyone for the support, thing is I am more likely to tear her head off than explain autism to her, I come from the school of thought that my sons business is exactly that, his business and I respect and guard his privacy.I have phoned SS back and it turns out that the neighbour in one of her calls [so she has been on to them more than once] told them that was autistic, therefore she knew she was reporting on a disabled child who she thought had carers and parents at home, obviously her prying didn't lead her to know it is actually therapy time and not carers.She would have been able to hear him laughing and whooping with the trampoline activities etc, this has been done out of spite because they should have moved to a retirement village and now expect us all to tip toe around them!She clearly has been asking round the neighbourhood about us and I really feel that being looked into under child protection laws by SS to satisfy this geriatric busy body is unacceptable, I want to know what I can do as regards harrassment.SS asked her how she got the particular number she phoned because it is not the standard number, she refused to say.I hear what you are all saying, but I want blood!Vicky>> Vicky - all I can say is damn lucky they are old!!! I have had to refrain> many a time from giving someone a slap for their own pure ignorance and have> decided not to waste my time or energy even explaining our situation to> people. Not worth your head space or breath. However I certainly would> take up the breach of confidentiality with SS. Deep breath Marina xx>

August 24, 2010

Bloody hell, is it a crime now for kids to laugh & whoop in their own garden, some people should get a life! Makes my blood boil to, don't blame you for wanting blood, id be the same.

xx

Autism Treatment From: MaddiganV@...Date: Tue, 24 Aug 2010 14:16:11 +0000Subject: Re: Iv'e been reported to SS!!!!!

Thanks everyone for the support, thing is I am more likely to tear her head off than explain autism to her, I come from the school of thought that my sons business is exactly that, his business and I respect and guard his privacy.I have phoned SS back and it turns out that the neighbour in one of her calls [so she has been on to them more than once] told them that was autistic, therefore she knew she was reporting on a disabled child who she thought had carers and parents at home, obviously her prying didn't lead her to know it is actually therapy time and not carers.She would have been able to hear him laughing and whooping with the trampoline activities etc, this has been done out of spite because they should have moved to a retirement village and now expect us all to tip toe around them!She clearly has been asking round the neighbourhood about us and I really feel that being looked into under child protection laws by SS to satisfy this geriatric busy body is unacceptable, I want to know what I can do as regards harrassment.SS asked her how she got the particular number she phoned because it is not the standard number, she refused to say.I hear what you are all saying, but I want blood!Vicky>> Vicky - all I can say is damn lucky they are old!!! I have had to refrain> many a time from giving someone a slap for their own pure ignorance and have> decided not to waste my time or energy even explaining our situation to> people. Not worth your head space or breath. However I certainly would> take up the breach of confidentiality with SS. Deep breath Marina xx>

August 24, 2010

Phone the police and say you suspect them of being pedophials due to constant staring, or even better if you can get them to strike you, you can get them arrested and locked up for a few hours > Autism Treatment > From: MaddiganV@...> Date: Tue, 24 Aug 2010 14:16:11 +0000> Subject: Re: Iv'e been reported to SS!!!!!> > > Thanks everyone for the support, thing is I am more likely to tear her head off than explain autism to her, I come from the school of thought that my sons business is exactly that, his business and I respect and guard his privacy.> I have phoned SS back and it turns out that the neighbour in one of her calls [so she has been on to them more than once] told them that was autistic, therefore she knew she was reporting on a disabled child who she thought had carers and parents at home, obviously her prying didn't lead her to know it is actually therapy time and not carers.> She would have been able to hear him laughing and whooping with the trampoline activities etc, this has been done out of spite because they should have moved to a retirement village and now expect us all to tip toe around them!> She clearly has been asking round the neighbourhood about us and I really feel that being looked into under child protection laws by SS to satisfy this geriatric busy body is unacceptable, I want to know what I can do as regards harrassment.> SS asked her how she got the particular number she phoned because it is not the standard number, she refused to say.> I hear what you are all saying, but I want blood!> Vicky> > >> > Vicky - all I can say is damn lucky they are old!!! I have had to refrain> > many a time from giving someone a slap for their own pure ignorance and have> > decided not to waste my time or energy even explaining our situation to> > people. Not worth your head space or breath. However I certainly would> > take up the breach of confidentiality with SS. Deep breath Marina xx> >> > > > > ------------------------------------> > DISCLAIMER> No information contained in this post is to be construed as medical advice. If you need medical advice, please seek it from a suitably qualified practitioner.>

August 24, 2010

Phone the police and say you suspect them of being pedophials due to constant staring, or even better if you can get them to strike you, you can get them arrested and locked up for a few hours > Autism Treatment > From: MaddiganV@...> Date: Tue, 24 Aug 2010 14:16:11 +0000> Subject: Re: Iv'e been reported to SS!!!!!> > > Thanks everyone for the support, thing is I am more likely to tear her head off than explain autism to her, I come from the school of thought that my sons business is exactly that, his business and I respect and guard his privacy.> I have phoned SS back and it turns out that the neighbour in one of her calls [so she has been on to them more than once] told them that was autistic, therefore she knew she was reporting on a disabled child who she thought had carers and parents at home, obviously her prying didn't lead her to know it is actually therapy time and not carers.> She would have been able to hear him laughing and whooping with the trampoline activities etc, this has been done out of spite because they should have moved to a retirement village and now expect us all to tip toe around them!> She clearly has been asking round the neighbourhood about us and I really feel that being looked into under child protection laws by SS to satisfy this geriatric busy body is unacceptable, I want to know what I can do as regards harrassment.> SS asked her how she got the particular number she phoned because it is not the standard number, she refused to say.> I hear what you are all saying, but I want blood!> Vicky> > >> > Vicky - all I can say is damn lucky they are old!!! I have had to refrain> > many a time from giving someone a slap for their own pure ignorance and have> > decided not to waste my time or energy even explaining our situation to> > people. Not worth your head space or breath. However I certainly would> > take up the breach of confidentiality with SS. Deep breath Marina xx> >> > > > > ------------------------------------> > DISCLAIMER> No information contained in this post is to be construed as medical advice. If you need medical advice, please seek it from a suitably qualified practitioner.>

August 24, 2010

I'm so sorry to hear this, Vicky.

I am afraid I had the same treatment with my own NT children when we moved to a

neighbourhood where their children had all grown up, with 4 small children.

My neighbour actually threatened to call the police when I had a friend over

with her children - they were one 4 year old, two 3 years and one 1 years!!!!!

(My 2 boys must have been at school) I told him to go ahead.

It made my life miserable as although I didn't mean to take any notice, I was

constantly telling them not to make too much noise or scream.

Please try to ingnore them and carry on with your great work with your little

boy. Miserable people like these are not worth bothering about. You know you

are doing your best and I am sure SS will agree.

Jill

> >

> > Vicky - all I can say is damn lucky they are old!!! I have had to refrain

> > many a time from giving someone a slap for their own pure ignorance and have

> > decided not to waste my time or energy even explaining our situation to

> > people. Not worth your head space or breath. However I certainly would

> > take up the breach of confidentiality with SS. Deep breath Marina xx

> >

>

August 24, 2010