What's the best way to react to an Obsession?

[Guest guest]

Hi Guys!

I have a 24 yr old son who lives on the internet is completely obsessed with Mad

Cow

Disease. Reasoning, as you may have guessed, doesn't work.

It has been an annoyance up till now for me (not for him) but now he found out

that

most medications in capsule form are made out of beef gelatin and abruptly

stopped

taking 100mg of clomipramine cold turkey. (Yes I checked with Teva

Pharmaceuticals)

Luckily he's on so many other meds, that his withdrawal was not as horrendous as

it

might have been but he is still extremely irritable and is aware that he's not

been the

most pleasant person to live with.

He now has me looking up everything under the sun to see if it has beef

byproducts in

it. Some do, some don't. I actually don't mind looking things up but I wonder

if I'm

feeding into the obsessions.

Should I be doing this? Am I making this worse?

If it is making it worse, how do I stop complying without a meltdown?

in NY

[Guest guest]

Hi, . Working on thoughts like that are much more difficult to

treat than the physical rituals. I think you are right that your

looking things up for him is feeding into his obsession, but right now

where he is so stirred up, it could be more harmful than helpful to

stop. I don't really have an answer for you, but hopefully somebody

else on here does. If not, you could try writing to one of the

experts on here to see what they might suggest.

I have a nephew, with scrupulosity, who sounds very much like your son.

Does your son see anyone for therapy?

I haven't seen you on here before. Are you new? If so, Welcome. )

BJ

>

> Hi Guys!

>

> I have a 24 yr old son who lives on the internet is completely

obsessed with Mad Cow

> Disease. Reasoning, as you may have guessed, doesn't work.

>

> It has been an annoyance up till now for me (not for him) but now he

found out that

> most medications in capsule form are made out of beef gelatin and

abruptly stopped

> taking 100mg of clomipramine cold turkey. (Yes I checked with Teva

Pharmaceuticals)

> Luckily he's on so many other meds, that his withdrawal was not as

horrendous as it

> might have been but he is still extremely irritable and is aware

that he's not been the

> most pleasant person to live with.

>

> He now has me looking up everything under the sun to see if it has

beef byproducts in

> it. Some do, some don't. I actually don't mind looking things up

but I wonder if I'm

> feeding into the obsessions.

>

> Should I be doing this? Am I making this worse?

>

> If it is making it worse, how do I stop complying without a meltdown?

>

> in NY

>

[Guest guest]

Only have a moment now - and still thinking - but, WOW! I looked up

beef byproducts and didn't realize what all it's used in.

Does he look up anything at all himself? (Thinking that could be a

problem if he sees what all I saw) Is he just concerned about

products that he would eat/take (internally)?

>

> Hi Guys!

>

> I have a 24 yr old son who lives on the internet is completely

obsessed with Mad Cow

> Disease. Reasoning, as you may have guessed, doesn't work.

>

> It has been an annoyance up till now for me (not for him) but now

he found out that

> most medications in capsule form are made out of beef gelatin and

abruptly stopped

> taking 100mg of clomipramine cold turkey. (Yes I checked with

Teva Pharmaceuticals)

[Guest guest]

I think it is a process whereby you set up mutual expectations in

form of therapy, such as trying graded exposures (eating a bit of

something with objectionable content?). It is hard to just stop

complying with ocd requests when you have accomodated, and that is

now expected. Your son would have to know you plan to stop, when, and

why (your help reinforces the false beliefs you don't want to

promote).

With eating it is tricky, you don't want him to stop eating enough,

due to not having reasuurance something is safe, and/or due to not

checking, as you are doing for him. But at same time accomodating by

checking and resuurance, feeds the obsession, and the end result

could be eating less and less either way...it is very difficult b/c

can become severe health issue. Get help soon if eating becomes

severely restricted. It really puts the mom in a bind because we are

more motivated to maintain health and nutrition in our children than

just about anything.

nancy grace

>

> Hi Guys!

>

> I have a 24 yr old son who lives on the internet is completely

obsessed with Mad Cow

> Disease. Reasoning, as you may have guessed, doesn't work.

>

> It has been an annoyance up till now for me (not for him) but now

he found out that

> most medications in capsule form are made out of beef gelatin and

abruptly stopped

> taking 100mg of clomipramine cold turkey. (Yes I checked with Teva

Pharmaceuticals)

> Luckily he's on so many other meds, that his withdrawal was not as

horrendous as it

> might have been but he is still extremely irritable and is aware

that he's not been the

> most pleasant person to live with.

>

> He now has me looking up everything under the sun to see if it has

beef byproducts in

> it. Some do, some don't. I actually don't mind looking things up

but I wonder if I'm

> feeding into the obsessions.

>

> Should I be doing this? Am I making this worse?

>

> If it is making it worse, how do I stop complying without a

meltdown?

>

> in NY

>

[Guest guest]

I think it is a process whereby you set up mutual expectations in

form of therapy, such as trying graded exposures (eating a bit of

something with objectionable content?). It is hard to just stop

complying with ocd requests when you have accomodated, and that is

now expected. Your son would have to know you plan to stop, when, and

why (your help reinforces the false beliefs you don't want to

promote).

With eating it is tricky, you don't want him to stop eating enough,

due to not having reasuurance something is safe, and/or due to not

checking, as you are doing for him. But at same time accomodating by

checking and resuurance, feeds the obsession, and the end result

could be eating less and less either way...it is very difficult b/c

can become severe health issue. Get help soon if eating becomes

severely restricted. It really puts the mom in a bind because we are

more motivated to maintain health and nutrition in our children than

just about anything.

nancy grace

>

> Hi Guys!

>

> I have a 24 yr old son who lives on the internet is completely

obsessed with Mad Cow

> Disease. Reasoning, as you may have guessed, doesn't work.

>

> It has been an annoyance up till now for me (not for him) but now

he found out that

> most medications in capsule form are made out of beef gelatin and

abruptly stopped

> taking 100mg of clomipramine cold turkey. (Yes I checked with Teva

Pharmaceuticals)

> Luckily he's on so many other meds, that his withdrawal was not as

horrendous as it

> might have been but he is still extremely irritable and is aware

that he's not been the

> most pleasant person to live with.

>

> He now has me looking up everything under the sun to see if it has

beef byproducts in

> it. Some do, some don't. I actually don't mind looking things up

but I wonder if I'm

> feeding into the obsessions.

>

> Should I be doing this? Am I making this worse?

>

> If it is making it worse, how do I stop complying without a

meltdown?

>

> in NY

>

[Guest guest]

Hi BJ

Yes I'm new. Thanks for the welcome.

He currently sees a psychopharmacologist at Mt Sinai who also does

some talk therapy. I have an appt for him at the end of this month

with a psychologist that I know and I think he'll be good for my

son. My son seems to respond better to men than to women where

advice is concerned.

I don't know much about scrupulosity but I did order 2 books on

Amazon to get me up to speed.

I spoke to my therapist yesterday and she told me that I was feeding

into his obsessions. But, like you, I think any abrupt change would

do more harm than good.

Sometimes you need advice from people in the trenches:)

in NY

On Jan 18, 2008, at 2:03 PM, svdbyhislove wrote:

> Hi, . Working on thoughts like that are much more difficult to

> treat than the physical rituals. I think you are right that your

> looking things up for him is feeding into his obsession, but right now

> where he is so stirred up, it could be more harmful than helpful to

> stop. I don't really have an answer for you, but hopefully somebody

> else on here does. If not, you could try writing to one of the

> experts on here to see what they might suggest.

>

> I have a nephew, with scrupulosity, who sounds very much like your

> son.

>

> Does your son see anyone for therapy?

>

> I haven't seen you on here before. Are you new? If so, Welcome. )

>

> BJ

>

>

> >

> > Hi Guys!

> >

> > I have a 24 yr old son who lives on the internet is completely

> obsessed with Mad Cow

> > Disease. Reasoning, as you may have guessed, doesn't work.

> >

> > It has been an annoyance up till now for me (not for him) but now he

> found out that

> > most medications in capsule form are made out of beef gelatin and

> abruptly stopped

> > taking 100mg of clomipramine cold turkey. (Yes I checked with Teva

> Pharmaceuticals)

> > Luckily he's on so many other meds, that his withdrawal was not as

> horrendous as it

> > might have been but he is still extremely irritable and is aware

> that he's not been the

> > most pleasant person to live with.

> >

> > He now has me looking up everything under the sun to see if it has

> beef byproducts in

> > it. Some do, some don't. I actually don't mind looking things up

> but I wonder if I'm

> > feeding into the obsessions.

> >

> > Should I be doing this? Am I making this worse?

> >

> > If it is making it worse, how do I stop complying without a

> meltdown?

> >

> > in NY

> >

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi BJ

Yes I'm new. Thanks for the welcome.

He currently sees a psychopharmacologist at Mt Sinai who also does

some talk therapy. I have an appt for him at the end of this month

with a psychologist that I know and I think he'll be good for my

son. My son seems to respond better to men than to women where

advice is concerned.

I don't know much about scrupulosity but I did order 2 books on

Amazon to get me up to speed.

I spoke to my therapist yesterday and she told me that I was feeding

into his obsessions. But, like you, I think any abrupt change would

do more harm than good.

Sometimes you need advice from people in the trenches:)

in NY

On Jan 18, 2008, at 2:03 PM, svdbyhislove wrote:

> Hi, . Working on thoughts like that are much more difficult to

> treat than the physical rituals. I think you are right that your

> looking things up for him is feeding into his obsession, but right now

> where he is so stirred up, it could be more harmful than helpful to

> stop. I don't really have an answer for you, but hopefully somebody

> else on here does. If not, you could try writing to one of the

> experts on here to see what they might suggest.

>

> I have a nephew, with scrupulosity, who sounds very much like your

> son.

>

> Does your son see anyone for therapy?

>

> I haven't seen you on here before. Are you new? If so, Welcome. )

>

> BJ

>

>

> >

> > Hi Guys!

> >

> > I have a 24 yr old son who lives on the internet is completely

> obsessed with Mad Cow

> > Disease. Reasoning, as you may have guessed, doesn't work.

> >

> > It has been an annoyance up till now for me (not for him) but now he

> found out that

> > most medications in capsule form are made out of beef gelatin and

> abruptly stopped

> > taking 100mg of clomipramine cold turkey. (Yes I checked with Teva

> Pharmaceuticals)

> > Luckily he's on so many other meds, that his withdrawal was not as

> horrendous as it

> > might have been but he is still extremely irritable and is aware

> that he's not been the

> > most pleasant person to live with.

> >

> > He now has me looking up everything under the sun to see if it has

> beef byproducts in

> > it. Some do, some don't. I actually don't mind looking things up

> but I wonder if I'm

> > feeding into the obsessions.

> >

> > Should I be doing this? Am I making this worse?

> >

> > If it is making it worse, how do I stop complying without a

> meltdown?

> >

> > in NY

> >

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Right now, he's overweight and suffering from sleep apnea and high

cholerestol. If he didn't eat for awhile, it would do him some

good. However, over the long haul, I do need a strategy.

I do want him to know that he's safe. I think that stress is what

set this off and I'm hoping this will simmer down if we could just

get him to relax a little.

in NY

On Jan 18, 2008, at 4:08 PM, nancy grace wrote:

> I think it is a process whereby you set up mutual expectations in

> form of therapy, such as trying graded exposures (eating a bit of

> something with objectionable content?). It is hard to just stop

> complying with ocd requests when you have accomodated, and that is

> now expected. Your son would have to know you plan to stop, when, and

> why (your help reinforces the false beliefs you don't want to

> promote).

>

> With eating it is tricky, you don't want him to stop eating enough,

> due to not having reasuurance something is safe, and/or due to not

> checking, as you are doing for him. But at same time accomodating by

> checking and resuurance, feeds the obsession, and the end result

> could be eating less and less either way...it is very difficult b/c

> can become severe health issue. Get help soon if eating becomes

> severely restricted. It really puts the mom in a bind because we are

> more motivated to maintain health and nutrition in our children than

> just about anything.

>

> nancy grace

>

>

> >

> > Hi Guys!

> >

> > I have a 24 yr old son who lives on the internet is completely

> obsessed with Mad Cow

> > Disease. Reasoning, as you may have guessed, doesn't work.

> >

> > It has been an annoyance up till now for me (not for him) but now

> he found out that

> > most medications in capsule form are made out of beef gelatin and

> abruptly stopped

> > taking 100mg of clomipramine cold turkey. (Yes I checked with Teva

> Pharmaceuticals)

> > Luckily he's on so many other meds, that his withdrawal was not as

> horrendous as it

> > might have been but he is still extremely irritable and is aware

> that he's not been the

> > most pleasant person to live with.

> >

> > He now has me looking up everything under the sun to see if it has

> beef byproducts in

> > it. Some do, some don't. I actually don't mind looking things up

> but I wonder if I'm

> > feeding into the obsessions.

> >

> > Should I be doing this? Am I making this worse?

> >

> > If it is making it worse, how do I stop complying without a

> meltdown?

> >

> > in NY

> >

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Right now, he's overweight and suffering from sleep apnea and high

cholerestol. If he didn't eat for awhile, it would do him some

good. However, over the long haul, I do need a strategy.

I do want him to know that he's safe. I think that stress is what

set this off and I'm hoping this will simmer down if we could just

get him to relax a little.

in NY

On Jan 18, 2008, at 4:08 PM, nancy grace wrote:

> I think it is a process whereby you set up mutual expectations in

> form of therapy, such as trying graded exposures (eating a bit of

> something with objectionable content?). It is hard to just stop

> complying with ocd requests when you have accomodated, and that is

> now expected. Your son would have to know you plan to stop, when, and

> why (your help reinforces the false beliefs you don't want to

> promote).

>

> With eating it is tricky, you don't want him to stop eating enough,

> due to not having reasuurance something is safe, and/or due to not

> checking, as you are doing for him. But at same time accomodating by

> checking and resuurance, feeds the obsession, and the end result

> could be eating less and less either way...it is very difficult b/c

> can become severe health issue. Get help soon if eating becomes

> severely restricted. It really puts the mom in a bind because we are

> more motivated to maintain health and nutrition in our children than

> just about anything.

>

> nancy grace

>

>

> >

> > Hi Guys!

> >

> > I have a 24 yr old son who lives on the internet is completely

> obsessed with Mad Cow

> > Disease. Reasoning, as you may have guessed, doesn't work.

> >

> > It has been an annoyance up till now for me (not for him) but now

> he found out that

> > most medications in capsule form are made out of beef gelatin and

> abruptly stopped

> > taking 100mg of clomipramine cold turkey. (Yes I checked with Teva

> Pharmaceuticals)

> > Luckily he's on so many other meds, that his withdrawal was not as

> horrendous as it

> > might have been but he is still extremely irritable and is aware

> that he's not been the

> > most pleasant person to live with.

> >

> > He now has me looking up everything under the sun to see if it has

> beef byproducts in

> > it. Some do, some don't. I actually don't mind looking things up

> but I wonder if I'm

> > feeding into the obsessions.

> >

> > Should I be doing this? Am I making this worse?

> >

> > If it is making it worse, how do I stop complying without a

> meltdown?

> >

> > in NY

> >

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

No he looks it up himself and he's the world's foremost authority on

prion diseases.

Yeah, I looked it up myself and I think I saw what you saw. It's a

little unsettling.

He's concerned about anything that might touch anything that he might

touch. Today the focus is on the cat's food. He no longer wants the

cat around him. I'm not giving away my cat over this.

On Jan 18, 2008, at 3:40 PM, wrote:

> Only have a moment now - and still thinking - but, WOW! I looked up

> beef byproducts and didn't realize what all it's used in.

>

> Does he look up anything at all himself? (Thinking that could be a

> problem if he sees what all I saw) Is he just concerned about

> products that he would eat/take (internally)?

>

>

>

>

> >

> > Hi Guys!

> >

> > I have a 24 yr old son who lives on the internet is completely

> obsessed with Mad Cow

> > Disease. Reasoning, as you may have guessed, doesn't work.

> >

> > It has been an annoyance up till now for me (not for him) but now

> he found out that

> > most medications in capsule form are made out of beef gelatin and

> abruptly stopped

> > taking 100mg of clomipramine cold turkey. (Yes I checked with

> Teva Pharmaceuticals)

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

No he looks it up himself and he's the world's foremost authority on

prion diseases.

Yeah, I looked it up myself and I think I saw what you saw. It's a

little unsettling.

He's concerned about anything that might touch anything that he might

touch. Today the focus is on the cat's food. He no longer wants the

cat around him. I'm not giving away my cat over this.

On Jan 18, 2008, at 3:40 PM, wrote:

> Only have a moment now - and still thinking - but, WOW! I looked up

> beef byproducts and didn't realize what all it's used in.

>

> Does he look up anything at all himself? (Thinking that could be a

> problem if he sees what all I saw) Is he just concerned about

> products that he would eat/take (internally)?

>

>

>

>

> >

> > Hi Guys!

> >

> > I have a 24 yr old son who lives on the internet is completely

> obsessed with Mad Cow

> > Disease. Reasoning, as you may have guessed, doesn't work.

> >

> > It has been an annoyance up till now for me (not for him) but now

> he found out that

> > most medications in capsule form are made out of beef gelatin and

> abruptly stopped

> > taking 100mg of clomipramine cold turkey. (Yes I checked with

> Teva Pharmaceuticals)

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

The internet, PERIOD, is unsettling. It's information overload. And

a lot of sites treat " everything " like the big " Bird Flu " epidemic

that has never come. Not to say it won't, because who knows, but for

a while there every news channel and story of tv was going overboard

about it. I was glad to see them move on. Anyway, if it upsets us

when we see stuff like that, imagine what it is doing to our kids, who

struggle to put things in perspective and not overreact. (

Our son freaked out once about cheese being made with rennet (cow

stomach), but only for a day because he likes cheese too much. lol

Oh, boy, Josh goes through the " this touched that " stuff too. He's

currently doing a exposure where he has to touch things with cleaner

and leave them that way. He's supposed to touch his pillow tonight. .

Both sides. . .We'll see how that goes.

Glad you found us, from NY. )

BJ

> > >

> > > Hi Guys!

> > >

> > > I have a 24 yr old son who lives on the internet is completely

> > obsessed with Mad Cow

> > > Disease. Reasoning, as you may have guessed, doesn't work.

> > >

> > > It has been an annoyance up till now for me (not for him) but now

> > he found out that

> > > most medications in capsule form are made out of beef gelatin and

> > abruptly stopped

> > > taking 100mg of clomipramine cold turkey. (Yes I checked with

> > Teva Pharmaceuticals)

> >

> >

> >

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

He no longer wants the cat around him. I'm not giving away

my cat over this.

LOL, , I wouldn't either!

I know he sees nothing wrong/odd in what he's doing. Or does he

realize it's part of his OCD OR that his OCD has him obsessing about

his interest?

My son has scrupulosity OCD and knows his OCD makes him obsess but

feels the thoughts are " his " and not OCD caused.

No he looks it up himself and he's the world's foremost authority on

> prion diseases.

>

> Yeah, I looked it up myself and I think I saw what you saw. It's

a

> little unsettling.

[Guest guest]

No, he's aware his OCD has taken hold of him and he's totally aware

that he's obsessing. We talk about it frequently.

It's great that he has insight into his disorder but I'm still not

having a great time. Know what I mean?

On Jan 19, 2008, at 6:41 PM, wrote:

> He no longer wants the cat around him. I'm not giving away

> my cat over this.

>

> LOL, , I wouldn't either!

>

> I know he sees nothing wrong/odd in what he's doing. Or does he

> realize it's part of his OCD OR that his OCD has him obsessing about

> his interest?

>

> My son has scrupulosity OCD and knows his OCD makes him obsess but

> feels the thoughts are " his " and not OCD caused.

>

>

>

> No he looks it up himself and he's the world's foremost authority on

> > prion diseases.

> >

> > Yeah, I looked it up myself and I think I saw what you saw. It's

> a

> > little unsettling.

>

>

>