struggling

August 3, 2002

thanks tess, sounds like you know just where i'm comming from. yes i can

re-apply too, but i thought it was 55. but still a long ways off. kathy in il

August 4, 2002

Hi Tess,

Yes our government seems to have a policy of not disclosing anything

to anyone. I was on V.A. Non service connected disability, I told my

VA counselor that I was returning to work, He said " Thats nice " . I

went back to work thinking I was doing the right thing. Sometime

later the V.A. found out I was working and demanded all their money

back. It was somewhere in the neighborhood of $20,000. About the same

time I lost my job, The lupus flared back up and I was financially

ruined. The good side (if you want to call it that)was the Va found

out I was unemployed and granted me my disability again.... Which

they kept till my debt to them was paid off!! Not able to work and

with 2 children I found myself on welfare. Seems like sometimes there

just is no easy way!!

Huggs

Lena

> Dear Kathy (IL)...I am sorry for your struggles. I know it is hard.

> When I first applied for Soc Sec, I was informed that since I had

been a

> stay-at-home mom to 4 children, I had no credits toward social

security.

> Therefore all I could qualify for was SSI. After my kids were

grown, I

> did work off and on as I could. I found out a few months ago that

had I

> chosen not to try to work, I would now be eligible for my deceased

> husband's SS which is almost double what SSI is. But since I

worked a

> little, I have to wait til I am 60. (I was widowed at 24, divorced

at

> 39) I was trying to do the " right " thing.

>

> We've been on the low-income/sec. 8 list since 96, still waiting.

Our

> county has very little fed. funded. housing. I have considered

moving

> to another county, but our medical insurance is very good here

compared

> to other places. And Em knows this area, the buses, etc. It would

be

> hard to move. But, we may have to at some point.

>

> Em works part-time at Safeway, and is eligible for SSI when her

hours

> are down, but it is very little - sometimes $35. - 40 a month.. She

> would make more if she didn't work and took the full SSI. But

people

> need to understand she is WAY more capable than she is disabled,

and at

> 24 she needs to be with people and have a life. Staying home all

day

> would hurt her terribly.

>

> This country, as much as I love it, does not make things easy for

people

> who are truly disabled and needy. We are so tight this month I'm

short

> for rent by a hundred. But I know God will take care of us. I

don't

> know what I'd do without my faith. Sometimes I do feel bitter, but

I

> really try to keep a hopeful outlook.

>

> A friend was complaining about how hard it was to live on $1700. a

> month. We live on about half of that. Sometimes I feel like I'm

going

> to have to force myself back to work, no matter what. But I might

be

> able to keep it up a couple months then I pay for it a few years

with so

> many health problems. I also lose part of the SSI. Caught between

a

> rock & a hard place.

>

> Whew... didn't know all that needed to come out!

>

> Hang in there, Kathy...we are all hoping and praying things will get

> better.

>

> Love & Hugs, Always...

>

> Tess

August 4, 2002

Hi Lena...That must have been so very difficult, Lena. I guess life

isn't necessarily supposed to be easy, but golly, a " little less

difficult " would sure be nice!

I am grateful to be able to share here, Thanks for your kindness.

Hugs...

Tess

August 4, 2002

Hi Tess,

At the time I thought I faced an impossible task, However we do seem

to be able to adapt and overcome.

Huggs

Lena

> Hi Lena...That must have been so very difficult, Lena. I guess life

> isn't necessarily supposed to be easy, but golly, a " little less

> difficult " would sure be nice!

>

> I am grateful to be able to share here, Thanks for your kindness.

>

> Hugs...

>

> Tess

April 1, 2004

Hi ) I'm no pro (yet) and I haven't had the drastic results

some have had. My advice would be to go a little slower on the

treadmill so you aren't so uncomfortable you want to quit but still

challenge yourself. I like to watch tv while I do the treadmill. I

usually wake up early and do cardio (5:30) and the only thing I can

find on is MTV and let me tell you, that is motivating, seeing all

the scantly clad hotties dancing around. And knowing I wouldn't mind

looking like that but would never have the guts to flaunt it ;o)

I've lost 21 lbs (169-148) and only 7% body fat (32%-25%)in 6 months,

some do more than that in 12 weeks. But I want to make this doable

for me and not try to kill myself and get burned out.

Good luck to you )

Sunshine

> I haven't posted much about what I'm doing lately because I've been

in limbo

> and didn't want to set myself up for disappointment. I did BFL

eating and

> exercising for 10 weeks. It was incredible that I stuck to it for

so long. I

> have never exercised regularly although I've tried in the past. So

this was

> major accomplishment. Progress was very slow, but thanks to this

group I kept

> going realizing that the scale was not a good judge and that

results would come

> in time. I didn't see much change at all despite my dedication,

but I still

> want to try again.

> After 2 weeks out of the program I'm starting again this week. It

has been

> so hard to get back into the routine of waking up at 5:30. I

didn't do it for

> the first few days and missed workouts. I did lower body yesterday

and just

> now I finished my first cardio in two weeks. It was awful. I'm so

discouraged

> because cardio is so difficult for me. It's hard enough to get out

of bed to

> start running, but then as I start I immediately want to quit. I

have the

> added pressure of feeling that I have to work harder with the

exercise because I

> didn't see much results the last 10 weeks. How in the world did

these people

> do it that are pictured in the book? I don't understand how they

can be so

> fit and muscular in 12 weeks. What do you think? So many people

on this list

> seem so dedicated and their progress is slow too. How can somebody

else

> following the same program have such dramatic results.

> Anyway back to this exercise stuff. I only made it 16 minutes on

the

> treadmill. I guess that's better than quitting at 5 minutes which

is what I wanted

> to do every minute after that. How do you keep going when you're

getting out

> of breath and your throat is burning? I'm so afraid that if I

don't keep the

> intensity up I won't see results but then I can't increase the

intensity

> because I won't last. It's a catch 22.

> One of the things that made the eating plan easy for me is that I

always knew

> I could eat again in a couple hours and I could eat at night. Also

the free

> days kept me from feeling deprived and I really looked forward to

them. With

> exercise I feel like there is no " light at the end of the tunnel "

to keep me

> going. It would be great to know that if I keep working at it I'll

build the

> stamina to make it through comfortably. But the nature of this

program is that

> you have to keep increasing the intensity so I never will be

comfortable. I

> feel like this will always be torture and I question myself

everyday if it's

> worth it.

>

> K

>

April 1, 2004

Hi ,

I have found diet is generally the culprit when folks aren't seeing

results, not usually the exercise portion. Why don't you post a

sample menu and we can take a look at it?

I am not sure what is considered dramatic? The folks in the book,

some of them took 2-3 challenges to get where they are at.

This program is great because you are getting in shape while loosing

weight so you may not see the 'dramatic' results that you do with say

Atkins or Weight watchers, but you know that you are not loosing lean

mass and you know you won't look like one of those 'Skinny Fat' folks.

Keep in mind a loss of 1-2 lbs a week is healthy and sustainable,

anything more then that signifies a lean mass loss. I know it took me

3 years to gain my weight and get out of shape so it will take me

more then 12 weeks to get back into shape and drop the fat.

Good luck

April 1, 2004

The thing that kept me from succeeding last time was my belief that

I was going to look like those people in the book once I was

finished, and anything short of that was not acceptable. So guess

what, I defined the term 'setting yourself up to fail'!! I am one

week away from my 12 week goal this time, ate clean most of the

time, and did not miss ONE workout. It's all about just doing YOUR

best and not trying to live up to anyone else's results.

You did the right thing by continuing the program, most people would

just give up but you haven't!!! Congratulate yourself!! This is not

about 12 weeks, it is about a lifetime of eating right and doing

good for your body. Everyone goes through tough spots, it's who

bounces back that has truly succeeded. (listen to me, like I'm some

philosopher!)

Anyway, IMHO, most of those people have trainers that push them, or

additional help with diet, etc. I applaud them, and I'm sure it took

a lot of work and dedication to get that way. But it's more

important on focusing on what is going to work for you.

Maybe post a few meals and exercises on this board and let some

feedback guide you back into things. Everyone here is always willing

to help out and you know you'll never be judged or criticized! Just

given the boot to the rear that we all need sometimes!!

Keep your chin up, you are doing something great for yourself!!!

Jana

> I haven't posted much about what I'm doing lately because I've

been in limbo

> and didn't want to set myself up for disappointment. I did BFL

eating and

> exercising for 10 weeks. It was incredible that I stuck to it for

so long. I

> have never exercised regularly although I've tried in the past.

So this was

> major accomplishment. Progress was very slow, but thanks to this

group I kept

> going realizing that the scale was not a good judge and that

results would come

> in time. I didn't see much change at all despite my dedication,

but I still

> want to try again.

> After 2 weeks out of the program I'm starting again this week. It

has been

> so hard to get back into the routine of waking up at 5:30. I

didn't do it for

> the first few days and missed workouts. I did lower body

yesterday and just

> now I finished my first cardio in two weeks. It was awful. I'm

so discouraged

> because cardio is so difficult for me. It's hard enough to get

out of bed to

> start running, but then as I start I immediately want to quit. I

have the

> added pressure of feeling that I have to work harder with the

exercise because I

> didn't see much results the last 10 weeks. How in the world did

these people

> do it that are pictured in the book? I don't understand how they

can be so

> fit and muscular in 12 weeks. What do you think? So many people

on this list

> seem so dedicated and their progress is slow too. How can

somebody else

> following the same program have such dramatic results.

> Anyway back to this exercise stuff. I only made it 16 minutes on

the

> treadmill. I guess that's better than quitting at 5 minutes which

is what I wanted

> to do every minute after that. How do you keep going when you're

getting out

> of breath and your throat is burning? I'm so afraid that if I

don't keep the

> intensity up I won't see results but then I can't increase the

intensity

> because I won't last. It's a catch 22.

> One of the things that made the eating plan easy for me is that I

always knew

> I could eat again in a couple hours and I could eat at night.

Also the free

> days kept me from feeling deprived and I really looked forward to

them. With

> exercise I feel like there is no " light at the end of the tunnel "

to keep me

> going. It would be great to know that if I keep working at it

I'll build the

> stamina to make it through comfortably. But the nature of this

program is that

> you have to keep increasing the intensity so I never will be

comfortable. I

> feel like this will always be torture and I question myself

everyday if it's

> worth it.

>

> K

>

April 1, 2004

Hear Hear Jana!

That's the Key to success you just stated there, do your best and

don't give up. No matter what you will look better and feel better

after 12 weeks, that's a gaurantee. So choose goals that are

achievable and you will be a winner. Your number one goal should be

to complete 12 weeks regardless of all other outcomes. That was my

number one goal in challenge 1.

April 1, 2004

In a message dated 4/1/2004 2:36:08 PM Eastern Standard Time,

writes:

I like to watch tv while I do the treadmill. I

usually wake up early and do cardio (5:30) and the only thing I can

find on is MTV and let me tell you, that is motivating,

Hi Sunshine. I know everybody is different but would you mind telling me how

you increase your intensity level with the treadmill. I'm just curious what

some people judge as a 5, 6, 9 or 10. Again I know that depends on how fit

you are. When I did the challenge the first time I was pretty conservative in

how I increased my intensity because I wanted to make it through. I would

start around level 5 for speed and then I would increase about every .4 - .5 as

I

went up a level so I would end up doing around level 7 as my 9 intensity.

Today I tried starting at 5.5 and increasing by .5 each time. That was much

harder for me. I've also considered changing incline instead of speed. I think

maybe I could manage a brisk walk at a higher incline rather than the full out

running. Would this work the same?

K

March 26, 2005

----- Original Message -----

From: ltlmisscrankypants

> I am wondering if the excessing swelling in my throat could in some

way have to do with missing 2 days of Prednisone. Sure, I'm supposed

to swell after a tonsillectomy...but this is ridiculous.

That wouldn't surprise me at all. Every time I get down to a low dose of

prednisone, my throat hurts and the glands swell.

Nina

March 26, 2005

----- Original Message -----

From: ltlmisscrankypants

> I am wondering if the excessing swelling in my throat could in some

way have to do with missing 2 days of Prednisone. Sure, I'm supposed

to swell after a tonsillectomy...but this is ridiculous.

That wouldn't surprise me at all. Every time I get down to a low dose of

prednisone, my throat hurts and the glands swell.

Nina

March 26, 2005

My prayer's for a speedy recovery are with you. Take it easy and take your

med's.

ltlmisscrankypants <ltlmisscrankypants@...> wrote:

Hi everyone.

I had my tonsillectomy yesterday morning, and although initially I was

told I would be kept in for a few days to be administered my meds via

IV, I was let go yesterday evening, because I seemed to be doing

okay. I was cranked up on pain meds....so of course I was

feeling " fine " .

I had been struggling since last night to get any fluids down at all. My

throat started to swell shut and I couldn't even swallow my own saliva.

As of today, I was on day 2 without Prednisone....and I could sure tell.

I was in excruciating as every joint in my body decided to flare right up.

Went back to the hospital this afternoon, and was just released again a

little while ago. Had some lovely IV fluids and meds to help me out.

Was feeling a lot better initially, but am going downhill again slowly

here. Was switched to a liquid pain reliever, but I struggle to get it

down as well. I was told to go back to the hospital in the morning if I

am still unable to take my meds and swallow properly.

I am wondering if the excessing swelling in my throat could in some

way have to do with missing 2 days of Prednisone. Sure, I'm supposed

to swell after a tonsillectomy...but this is ridiculous.

Needed to vent...thanks.

March 26, 2005