Sad news

[Guest guest]

Hi guys,

Ok...i don't know how many know or remember...but my dad was diagnosed with

stomach cancer back in January. He had surgery to remove part of his

stomach..and he was going through chemo..and we all though all was ok. Well

my dad is having some pains again that are similar to what he was having and

is having trouble eating. The dr ordered an endoscopy for Wed..and is pretty

sure that there is blockage and most likely is the cancer....and if it

is..basically there is nothing they can do...and he will end up going on IV's

for the rest of his life which won't be long...

After my dad's surgery...the surgeon came out and told us that he was really

sick and that with this type of cancer... a lot of patients dont' live long

even with chemo. Well..they told my dad more positive things to get him to

have a good outlook on this..as that helps sometimes. Well..my dad went to

the big cancer hospital in NYC..and the dr there told my dad that he would be

ok..and will have to have chemo for the rest of his life. And that totally

contradicted what the surgeon had said..so i guess i wanted to believe this

dr and so i went into denial. Well my dad told me today the news of the

enodocscopy..and what would likely happen. It's not definite..but just

about....I'm a mess..i don't know how to handle this. I really don't. I'm

trying to be strong..and not cry in front of ..but this is awful. I

knew this would probably happen..but like i said..i believed the dr in NY

(it's a famous hospital for cancer) and now i'm so upset. I can't imagine

watching my dad withering away...or suffering...or dying. I can't imagine

losing my father. My mother is not self sufficient (she has depression and

other mental illensses) and she is medicated..and is pretty out of it...she's

not working..nor would she be able to...and my sister is workign as a

waitress..and i don't know what would happen to them...and as bad and mean as

it sounds..i could not handle my mom living with me and having to take care

of her ....i'm taking care of . I hope that doesn't make me sound

awful...i love her..it's just hard for me to see her the way she is...she's

been that way for a few years now. Anyway...this is really hard for me to

handle..and i just needed to share it with you guys...I know you guys don't

know what to say...i don't even know what to say...i just wanted some

support...and you guys are always here for me.